I am a horrible sinner. Please help.

[Alithis]

<staff edit>

I stumbled upon pornography when I was about 10 or 11, and for the rest of my atheistic life until 24 years of age I continued watching. Then at 24, after God showed to me that He exists and I started believing, I realized pornography, masturbation and any kind of lusting was a serious, grave sin in the eyes of the Lord; so I prayed and talked to God, I got convicted, then I promised the Lord not to watch pornography or touch or give in to lust ever again. Now for 3 years I've never done any of those things, neither did I have a hard time struggling maybe except the first month, and nor do I ever look at any women with the same eyes I used to before.

What happened? Well after I realized the value of God and the graveness of sin, and the seriousness of promising things to God, I started praying. I asked the Lord to give me understanding, to give me eyes of a father and a spirit of a brother towards all people; and most importantly not ever to compromise. Until I figured out not to obey that ever sneaky voice on the corner of your head going "look over there, there's a beautiful woman you've got to see!" I had problems with lust invading my thoughts. But when I learned to shut that down militantly, I can honestly tell you that the same problems with lust that I had before in my life I experience no more. Now I can remain calm and collected, dispelling lustful temptation all the while praising God and praying for others in certain situations, whereas before I would not even be able to remain there.

The first, most important and the "hardest" step is this: You sit down and start talking to God and ask for the understanding and power to do the right thing; ask that you may clearly see, that you may understand it is Him who loves you so much that you are grieving. The Lord is already grieved enough with all the things that happen around the world through His children who don't believe in His name, so let us, who are called and chosen to console Him not grieve Him as well.

Sit down and pray, spend as much time as you need with the Lord and wear no masks when you open your heart to Him. Ask for the strength to do the right thing, and then rise up with your God given will not to mess with that sin ever again. You "amen" is cutting every connection, deleting whatever you may have, burning bridges that should not be there and saying "I'm done". Do not compromise, and whenever you feel like you are being overwhelmed by evil thoughts, immediately turn to the Lord and praise Him that He's with you and that He has given you a will to do the right thing, strength to carry on and that you are not ever tempted beyond your ability to endure. If you turn to the Lord and start praising Him every time you are tempted, the devil will have to flee lest he causes you to grow further into Jesus.

Those drawings are not more beautiful than your wife. Neither can they ever be, they have no soul; and there is only a single person with whom you are one with, spirit and body. Only one who is flesh of your flesh, bone of your bone; with whom before God you were made one and blessed with the oath of marriage. Love God with all your heart, so that you may love your wife as she deserves. Believe me, nothing in this world is worth grieving the Lord; crush this weakness in prayer and communion with the Holy Spirit of God. You can do it today. God bless.

This

 

[dontwc]

I have read a lot of good advice here, but I'd like to say this on the subject. The problem of lust does not require the internet, dirty magazines or videos. Just the thoughts in my head are pornographic enough. That said, my go-to verse for overcoming this is Job 31:1
I made a covenant with my eyes not to look lustfully at a young woman.
I have actually spoken to my eyes and commanded them not to lust after three women I come in contact with, and they are many. I have had a lot of practice since my work puts me in people's homes and I have been alone with some woman almost daily. And some of them are very attractive. I reminded myself regularly that my eyes were not to look upon these women lustfully, and over time I have been happy with the results. One day I was checking in the kids that come to a Christian day camp, and it was time to register and collect money. One of the moms is a virtual Barbie doll with tight clothes and an exposed cleavage to make you stare. After she walked away, my wife came to me (I did not know she was watching) and said, "How do you do it? You didn't even glance at her boobs!" She had no idea I'd been practicing this for over 20 years!

So, have a talk with your eyeballs. Coach them up!

 

[Onetruefreedom]

I've been in a similar place (and still am). Lusting after hyper feminine constructs made to look like women. But after watching through a lot of hentai I've noticed how violent and de-humanizing a lot of the subject matter is. I realized if I continued down this path I would end up internalizing those feelings and maybe expressing them towards my significant other. Just think about your wife going through what those characters are and see if you still enjoy those videos. I continue to pray for you man,

 

[Neostarwcc]

what were your habits regarding pornography and masturbation before you got married?

Multiple times a day. It also was before I became a Christian.

 

[S.O.J.I.A.]

Multiple times a day. It also was before I became a Christian.

…….yep

the idea that the issue of porn goes away when we get married(...….or find a girlfriend) is simply not true as the problem isn't a lack of sexual access but that we have reduced women to sexual utilities.

you get a wife and can finally fulfill your sexual desires in an acceptable manner. problem is, once you're done with that novelty you go to the next thing. being able to finally make it with a woman is just a step up from the high you had before and now you just continue to "chase the dragon" AKA get that next sexual high. for you, it's watching anime porn.



been there, done that, got the T-shirt. my struggle ended when the LORD saved me and changed the way I valued women. may the LORD extent similar grace to you.

 

[SpiritRehab]

I don't really feel very comfortable talking about this but, I have a porn addiction.

The way to gain strength over all temptation,
is Growing in Love for our Father in Heaven, while Fasting.
Take vacation time,
cancel internet, phone data & tv,
(tv doesn't have porn, but it has sexy ladies)
Fast for Forty Days & Nights,
drinking only natural mineral water with a squeeze of lemon or lime,
Feed yourself Scripture to deepen your Love for Him
and beg our Father in Heaven
morning, mid-day and at night,
to grant you repentance
to help you to Love Him with ALL your heat, mind & strength
and to give you strength over ALL temptation
worship him
and faithfully thank him.
All in the name of His son.

Ask yourself:
If a wife says she loves her husband of 10 years
but never bothered to learn His name
instead has been calling Him by the nickname His worst enemy gave Him
how deep is her love?

If her love is shallow
how well will she serve Him?

Do you pray to Jesus?
He taught us to pray to our Father in Heaven.
Do you call our Father in Heaven, LORD?
He taught us His name and used it almost 7,000x in the OT
but the translators replaced it with the name of the Canaanite god bal: lord.
What is the name of our Father in Heaven?
Jehovah?
There is not J in Hebrew.
And He communicated and recorded His name in Hebrew almost 7000x
So the pronunciation, must be natural to that language.
Yehovah?
Ye Hovah means, Let There Be Mischeif
Yahweh?
His name is YHWH: YaHUaH / Yahuah
To grow in Love
you must confirm this for yourself & with the Holy Spirit.

Also,
Yahusha not Jesus
House of Gathering not Church = Circus = Circe = Greek goddess with a cup of wine
Discipleship not live long pew sitting
12 Disciples with wives & children, not 500+ visitors
You must escape all error of man and learn all truth from the Holy Spirit of Yah
Truth leads to Love
Error leads darkness
and eventually to nakedness in the wilderness
like the many tribes of the world
who all started from the same technologically advanced people at Babel.

<staff edit>
We all have a criminal nature.
Porn is a crime you have allowed yourself to experience more
and more experience makes it easier for us to choose & do the same thing again.
You have trained yourself to choose & do a crime that is rewarding.

Once we have developed a taste of a crime
we will always be tempted by it.
I did not know I would like Mango so much
I did not crave Mango
until I tried it.
So temptation will always be with us
BUT
just as we train ourselves to choose & do crimes
and get stronger at choosing & doing those crimes,
we can train ourselves to choose to flee temptation
and get stronger at running to our Father to remove the temptation.

Choosing to Fast,
meal opportunity after meal opportunity,
trains yourself to choose to deny bodily temptation
Asking our Father in Heaven
to give you strength over ALL temptation
and to remove the temptation of the moment
every time you are tempted
is experience choosing to flee to Him
and experience rejecting temptation.
Plus He will give you strength.

Read Memorize James & John's letters.
We all know that Salvation is a Free Gift.
Paul is the only thing the Church teaches
and Grace is Wonderful,
but memorizing & understanding James & John
will help you realize salvation is not only from the punishment for our crimes,
but from our criminal nature itself,
not only after resurrection,
but now, as we wait for the return of our High Priest & King.

Love is the Height of Holyness
Love is the Opposite of Evil
Love is the Cure.
Love YaHUaH your Most High with ALL your Heart, Mind & Strength.

 

[Sketcher]

Be thankful that your wife is giving you so much grace on this matter, and do what you can to phase it out. I unfortunately don't have a solution for phasing out any kind of pornography; all I can tell you is what doesn't work.

 

[Kristen.NewCreation]

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[Anguspure]

I don't really feel very comfortable talking about this but, I have a porn addiction. More specifically a hentai addiction. I don't touch a lot (Probably like 2-3 times every month or two) this makes me feel guilty because I'm basically saying that these virtual women are more beautiful than my wife. They are but isn't that not really the point? The point isn't supposed to be about "these women are more beautiful than my wife" it's supposed to be "I'm cheating on my wife by masturbating to women more beautiful than my wife".

Why do I call it cheating on my wife? Well because it basically is. I'm not having physical sex with these virtual women but I'm intentending to and didn't Jesus say that even lustful thoughts are equivalent to cheating in the eyes of God? So, yes about 2-3 times every month or two I cheat on my wife.

My wife knows about my hentai addiction and she doesn't understand it when sex is so much better. And yes, sex IS so much better and the stupid part is why should I even have to touch when I have sex with my wife like 2-3 times a week? It's so stupid! It's like, I WANT to cheat on my wife! Is there anything I can do to kick this habit? Because, I am such a sinner!

Start off by not calling yourself a horrible sinner. Calling yourself this sort of thing only serves to reinforce the shame-sin cycle which the Law is powerless to break.
Rather choose to fix your mind in the things of the Spirit, which in respect of sex is the Love of your gourgeous and sexy wife.

 

[Naalderiis]

How to Edit Your Windows Hosts File | Techwalla.com

edit your hosts file to redirect certain web addresses to your home IP. it will cause those web addresses to not load without having to edit the hosts file again to get to them.
it will make it difficult to visit your normal websites.
keep adding new ones if you keep going to new sites.

i haven't heard of one but there may be a program or browser extension that will redirect certain website addresses to something else. if there is such a thing and you find one you can set up yourself i'd suggest various bible verses on biblehub or something. pick some that might make you feel disgusted with what you were thinking about doing. go for the real hellfire and brimstone stuff if you need to.

or maybe options in a browser... like in chromium there's a bit on the address bar with a lock and "Secure" if it's a https page. if you right click on that you can choose to block a lot of things like flash and images from showing on a website.

the more hassle you make it to get to the websites the better. eventually it will get to the point that it's so annoying to get to what you're looking for that you just won't feel like bothering. once that happens don't undo all the crap you did to make it hard for yourself. eventually you may forget you even did those things in teh first place... that's good because eventually you may have the urge to relapse and by that point if you're like most people and are fairly technologically illiterate you won't have a clue what you did.

+edit+
i'd also like to point out that all of that junk i just mentioned is no replacement for prayer, willpower, and stubborn refusal to give in rather than do what's good.
ask God to help you view your sin from closer to his perspective.

 

[Ojpalosa]

<staff edit>

I stumbled upon pornography when I was about 10 or 11, and for the rest of my atheistic life until 24 years of age I continued watching. Then at 24, after God showed to me that He exists and I started believing, I realized pornography, masturbation and any kind of lusting was a serious, grave sin in the eyes of the Lord; so I prayed and talked to God, I got convicted, then I promised the Lord not to watch pornography or touch or give in to lust ever again. Now for 3 years I've never done any of those things, neither did I have a hard time struggling maybe except the first month, and nor do I ever look at any women with the same eyes I used to before.

What happened? Well after I realized the value of God and the graveness of sin, and the seriousness of promising things to God, I started praying. I asked the Lord to give me understanding, to give me eyes of a father and a spirit of a brother towards all people; and most importantly not ever to compromise. Until I figured out not to obey that ever sneaky voice on the corner of your head going "look over there, there's a beautiful woman you've got to see!" I had problems with lust invading my thoughts. But when I learned to shut that down militantly, I can honestly tell you that the same problems with lust that I had before in my life I experience no more. Now I can remain calm and collected, dispelling lustful temptation all the while praising God and praying for others in certain situations, whereas before I would not even be able to remain there.

The first, most important and the "hardest" step is this: You sit down and start talking to God and ask for the understanding and power to do the right thing; ask that you may clearly see, that you may understand it is Him who loves you so much that you are grieving. The Lord is already grieved enough with all the things that happen around the world through His children who don't believe in His name, so let us, who are called and chosen to console Him not grieve Him as well.

Sit down and pray, spend as much time as you need with the Lord and wear no masks when you open your heart to Him. Ask for the strength to do the right thing, and then rise up with your God given will not to mess with that sin ever again. You "amen" is cutting every connection, deleting whatever you may have, burning bridges that should not be there and saying "I'm done". Do not compromise, and whenever you feel like you are being overwhelmed by evil thoughts, immediately turn to the Lord and praise Him that He's with you and that He has given you a will to do the right thing, strength to carry on and that you are not ever tempted beyond your ability to endure. If you turn to the Lord and start praising Him every time you are tempted, the devil will have to flee lest he causes you to grow further into Jesus.

Those drawings are not more beautiful than your wife. Neither can they ever be, they have no soul; and there is only a single person with whom you are one with, spirit and body. Only one who is flesh of your flesh, bone of your bone; with whom before God you were made one and blessed with the oath of marriage. Love God with all your heart, so that you may love your wife as she deserves. Believe me, nothing in this world is worth grieving the Lord; crush this weakness in prayer and communion with the Holy Spirit of God. You can do it today. God bless.

Wow... Just wow, thank you for this!