How to Spank a Child Biblically?

[Logic Over Emotionalism]

I forgot that I’d answered you . And I’m still not interested in creationist pseudoscience or bible based archeology because I’ve heard so much bad press about it. Given the pseudoscience nonsense I get from most soi disant bible believers it would be s complete waste of time

If we did have that discussion the sources wouldn't be from Christian sites as I would want something that is unbiased as I always have done. To say the people of the Bible are merely beliefs is to say Julius Caesar or Pontius Pilate (or biblical cities like Jerusalem and Bethlehem that still exist) are just beliefs even tho we have evidence that they existed.

 

[Logic Over Emotionalism]

Christians have no moral rationale for spanking their children

I gave a detailed review of a few problems with this article in post #105 and added more to it today.

 

[Logic Over Emotionalism]

if you choose to adopt and then continue to use spanking in your repertoire, there will be neg. consequences

no adopted child comes with a clean slate

to use spanking to stop a behavior momentarily
(which is all spanking does) will not help an adopted child to change any learned behaviors, learn an alternative appropriate behavior, feel connected to you, or learn to feel safe in a new environment

This hinges on age and trust between you and the child. By age five our oldest Michael we don't spank anymore as he is disciplined and displays responsibility as well as making good choices. Spanking is never our first response as you may believe. We do time outs, chores (all kids have chores by age 2), and taking away privileges before spanking becomes a possibility. When spankings do happen we sit down and talk about it so we can have a healthy dialogue so we can answer why they got spanked. As for adopted children it depends on trust and age. Studies have shown that it becomes less effective as children get older.

 

[Dave-W]

to use spanking to stop a behavior momentarily (which is all spanking does)

Depends on how bad the spanking is and the emotional make up of the child.

If it is bad enough, and the child fearful enough of pain, it may change the behavior long term. But it will be out of fear, not love or a desire to obey.

 

[Dave-W]

The Bible doesn't criticize spanking, because it doesn't mention it at all! No description of striking a child's rear exists in the text.

Proverbs 19:29
Judgments are prepared for scoffers, And blows for the back of fools.

Proverbs 22:15
Foolishness is bound up in the heart of a child; The rod of discipline will remove it far from him.

Proverbs 23:13
Do not hold back discipline from the child, Although you strike him with the rod, he will not die.

 

[mama2one]

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[Dave-W]

was shy and one day didn't stand up for milk count
figures the one day my mom asks if I drank my milk at school
didn't have the wherewithal to say didn't like standing for milk count as felt it drew attention to me

getting hit didn't "change any behavior that needed changing" but it did teach me to never, ever get caught doing anything wrong and increased my shyness for fear of saying anything wrong

it also made me realize, I couldn't TRUST either parent and to this day, I have little trust for people

I totally get that.

 

[mama2one]

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[Dave-W]

There is no "the" in Proverbs 22.15 It is just the plain word shevet. If it was THE rod it would have been ha-shevet.

In Exodus 21.20, shevet has a prefix b'- meaning by or thru.

I do not think the distinction you are drawing stands up in the Hebrew.

FYI: Hebrew does NOT have the indefinite articles of a or an. Only the definite article the.

 

[mama2one]

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[W2L]

Ive seen children who wouldn't listen until they were spanked. Spanking was necessary.

 

[Dave-W]

I wish I could find the other article written by the Pastor
no way all the Bibles are wrong
as there is definitely "a rod" and "the rod"

Only in english.

 

[RDKirk]

If you come at the subject with a Logic Over Emotion viewpoint, any kind of emotional trauma the child experiences gets discounted if the procedure "works" in limiting the bad behavior.

All that a child learns about self-discipline and obedience to authority is by "emotional trauma."

No discipline seems pleasant at the time, but painful. -- Hebrews 12

There is no learning without trauma.

After reading Dr Spock, I tried giving my toddler son a "time out" as recommended. He nearly went catatonic in abandonment panic.

A quick swat on the butt taught the lesson with much, much less emotional trauma. In fact, I doubt there was any emotional trauma. It was much the same way he learned to walk and avoid falling on his butt.

 

[Dave-W]

All that a child learns about self-discipline and obedience to authority is by "emotional trauma."

Many children - true. Not necessarily ALL children.

A quick swat on the butt taught the lesson with much, much less emotional trauma.

There are swats and then there are SWATS.

I experienced a lot of the latter.

 

[RDKirk]

Many children - true. Not necessarily ALL children.

There are swats and then there are SWATS.

I experienced a lot of the latter.

The difference is supposed to be what this topic is about.

 

[Dave-W]

The difference is supposed to be what this topic is about.

I know. My dad insisted that his way WAS biblical. (and he had the seminary degree to "prove" it)

 

[mama2one]

All that a child learns about self-discipline and obedience to authority is by "emotional trauma."
There is no learning without trauma..

not true

there are plenty of positive discipline methods
we have taught our child without trauma

time-ins, modeling correct behavior, teaching/showing how to do something correctly such as petting dog nicely, reading Christian books re traits such as kindness, when very young distraction, bonding & closeness, realizing BEFORE child acts up if child needs a snack break, nap, physical activity, rocked, or a calming bath, natural consequences, catching and praising good behavior so it's repeated, etc

too many parents ignore children when they're playing quietly but then if they act up, then parents swoop in
if parents give attention and praise kid's good behavior, kids get the attention they crave and there's no reason to misbehave for attention seeking (which many kids do) plus they repeat good behavior

 

[mama2one]

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[W2L]

probably a parent yelling at them instead of getting down to their level and talking in a calm voice

every parent I've seen hitting their kid in the neighborhood or at a store, the parent was in a vile mood and yelling at their kids before wacking them

the parent was the one out of control

Ive seen children that would laugh at an adult instead of obeying commands, no matter how calm the adult was, no matter what they say. I have also seen these kids get spanked and immediately they begin to listen and obey.

 

[mama2one]

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