How to not turn people off to God...

[LuminousFive]

This is very important for new believers, because without Christ we can not be "Christians". I don't believe in saying "you are a sinner, you are going to hell", that is very harsh to a non-believer, but it should be mentioned that we are not perfect, only one man was, and his name was Jesus...he loves all of us!

Lead people to explore Christ by telling them about his love. Once they see his grace and perfection, his light will shine on their sinful and imperfect lives. Let the Light of Christ illuminate our lives. His light is so bright it can expose even the smallest of flaws. I don't hide my light under a bushel, but it is nowhere near as bright as the light of the savior himself. Let us allow the Light of Christ to shine into unbeliever's lives and resist the temptation to try and expose other peoples sin ourselves. Only when we see perfection can we understand what flaw really is.

 

[hiumble1]

how do they know the gospel without it being spoken... (read any of the gospels from Paul)
To them who know not the law the Coss seams Foolishness.... If you were to tell me that Jesus loves me and God loves me I would say cool..... but would still be taking part in this world and giving into sin, Your light only goes so far unless you explain it!... And How do you explain it? I have this light because God Loves me and Jesus Loves me..... sorry to tell you but you left out an important part....
For Many Will cry out his name on the day of judgement and he will Say depart form me you worker of iniquity, I never knew you; Why is that? ask yourself why would this or could this happen... someone knows Jesus and cries out his name at the time of judgement and he makes that statement, why?
Could it be because they came to Christ out of love and not out of need of heart. What are they missing that could cause such a calamity to occur... They Know Jesus yet they never repented from their sins? Why?.... could it be because they did not have an understanding of what sin is....

Analogy:
You walk along a path that follows this river, when you see a man in a canoe in the river paddling up stream but slowly being pulled down stream. The man has a very happy and content look on his face, so you continue your walk, when you see just 100 feet down stream a water fall. To you horror you realize that this man is slowly being pulled back to this waterfall and will be pulled over, so you run back and luckily find some roap on the bank near the river. You take the roap and throw it really hard over to the man. the roap lands right over the front of the canoe the man looks at it and immediately pushes it off the from of the canoe and continues paddling and having a ball... you try several more times with each the same thing happening the man pushes away the roap until the last time it is too late, the man goes over the falls and is not seen again... why didn't the guy just tell the man that what he is doing was dangerous and that there was a waterfall downstream, wouldn't that have helped out the situation, probably the man may have taken the rope and not pushed it away. for understanding what situation he was in it would have made sense to him to take the rope and come to safety.

I challenge you to read your Bible and see where Jesus was a witness to himself (the rich young man, the woman at the well) also see when the apostles witnessed of Jesus.
Paul speaks that he did not sin but by the law....
It is by the law that man knows sin and understands that he is now an enemy of God (thats right I said enemy of GOD, check you Bible it is in there)
Then the cross no longer seams foolish, it makes sense and they will run to the cross.

Law to the Proud
Grace to the Humble

 

[LuminousFive]

I no longer feel the need to argue this point with you. We both want the same thing here, to bring people to Christ. I still think that you are misunderstanding what I am saying, but I don't know how to make it any clearer than this: Lead people to Christ by telling them about his unending and perfect love for them. This gets them to look into the gospels and explore the faith. During the initial encounter with a non-believer telling them that they are sinners is counterproductive. Once they have explored the faith and grasp that the essence of God is his love, you can follow up with this person. At that point it is productive to tell them about God's law, sin, and Grace. But, when we use God's law/sin/grace as an initial approach people are immediately turned off to the whole concept.

That Is all I will say. I have said everything as clearly as I know how. Don't expect another response from me on this thread. If you have any questions about what I have said please PM me.

Love in Christ,
John

 

[clonenomore]

To them who know not the law the Coss seams Foolishness.... If you were to tell me that Jesus loves me and God loves me I would say cool..... but would still be taking part in this world and giving into sin, Your light only goes so far unless you explain it!... And How do you explain it? I have this light because God Loves me and Jesus Loves me..... sorry to tell you but you left out an important part....

...Without the mention of sin, we would not have known why Jesus came and died for us. This is very important for new believers, because without Christ we can not be "Christians". I don't believe in saying "you are a sinner, you are going to hell", that is very harsh to a non-believer, but it should be mentioned that we are not perfect, only one man was, and his name was Jesus...he loves all of us!

I still believe that all of you are missing the point that LuminousFive and I are trying to make -- we are not saying that true repentance is not important. We are saying that many of us miss the point when we witness. We lead with the fact that we are all sinners, and that closes many non-believer's minds. We have to lead with the love that Jesus has for us.

The Great News of the Gospel is that God loves us so much that He came to earth as a baby, grew up and went through childhood and adolescence, was tempted as we are tempted, was tortured and beaten for us, died on a cross as a substitute for us, and finally arose from the dead to serve as our advocate. That's it. Pretty simple.

Many of us live outside of societal norms. Those of us in the margins of life need to hear that Jesus loves us -- because we know that something's missing. Additionally, that love is more than we get from others. Once we know that Jesus loves us, even though we do bad things such as alcohol abuse, drug abuse, etc, our minds are then opened to hearing about sin.

I challenge you to read your Bible and see where Jesus was a witness to himself (the rich young man, the woman at the well) also see when the apostles witnessed of Jesus.

Okay, I did read my Bible. And you know what? I read where Jesus demonstrated His love before He said anything about sin. The method varied based on individual needs, but He led with His love. Let's look at just 2 examples that I found:

Look at the infirm man at the pool of Bethesda (John 5:2-15). He lived in the margins of life. People walked past and didn't even look at him. He was "unclean" and to hang out with him would make you "unclean". But what did Jesus do? He walked up, asked the dude if he wanted to walk. The guy was able to walk. Jesus saw him later, and that's when He brought up sin (v15).

Consider one of your own examples -- the woman at the well (John 4: 1-28). Jesus didn't lead with sin. Instead, He showed her His love. She was a samaritan. Samaritans and Jews just didn't mix. But, again, what did Jesus do? He stopped and talked to the woman. He had a conversation. He showed her love. After her mind was opened because of His love, He asked her about her love life and brought out her sin.

So when we go back to the Bible, even Jesus witnessed in this way.

 

[Sharky]

That's enough fellas.


Neither should be hindering the other from their labor fields. God will use both to reach different people. If one plows and another waters one side cannot say to the other how to do their job.

We have few labourers in the fields as it is. Just do what you can. Any argument of technique is better directed to those who don't labour for souls.

 

[clonenomore]

We have few labourers in the fields as it is....

Thanks, Sharky. You're right -- we should be putting our efforts towards following the Great Commission. We are each wonderfully and amazingly made. Because of that, no two of us are going to witness in the same way. That's because no two people need to hear the gospel the same way. God knows that different people need to hear the message in different ways, so He created us to deliver that message in a specific way. He sends folks to us that need to hear OUR story told in OUR unique way.

I guess I should have remembered my screen name -- God don't want clones!

 

[Dewi Sant]

Thanks so much for helping me to understand what is a better way to witness to people. I ave tried so many times but I somehow catch up on it and before I know about it I am telling the people why Jesus died on the cross for our sins and though I would accept that as basic knowledge the very idea that some guy should be killed 2000 years ago for us in the future seems absurd.

I have been getting a great deal of help in evangelism recently, through the television, through personal meditation and prayer and now from the internet. You are all great people and may God bless you.

 

[simpletrust]

First and foremost, this post is not meant to offend anyone, it is meant to give you a different perspective.

I have been witnessed to in many different ways, from people holding up signs of pictures of "hell" to being shouted at and being told I'm a sinner and need to repent or risk eternal damnation, to the now very popular list of questions "have you ever stolen, have you ever lied... etc". I am here to tell you that almost all of these methods turn people off. Let me tell you what goes through the mind of the average person who is approached by one of these "you are a sinner" method witnesses... "Oh crap, now I have to deal with this idiot" They are turned off from the begining.

Being a witness is not so simple that you can walk up to someone, ask/tell them that they are a sinner, tell them that god will forgive them and move on... The average person thinks of this as a minor inturruption in their day.

Some guidelines...first and foremost stop telling people they are sinners. How would you like it if someone walked up to you and told you that you are a terrible person? Telling people that they are inherently bad people right off the bat is a great way to make them tune out to everything you say after that. An alternative? Walk up to someone and see if you can ask them a few questions...

"Hi I'm John, Would you mind if I asked you a few questions?"
"Sure"
"First, Whats your name?"
"Dave"
"Nice to meet you Dave"
"Dave, would you consider yourself religious?"

Now here is where you actually have to start using your brain...

"No, I'm an athiest, or yes I'm Hindu (or whatever)?"
"Would you mind telling me a little about why you don't believe in God?/Why you believe in your religion?"
"Sure, I dont believe in god because of 'X'"

Listen to what he/she has to say. People actually do have reasons for what they believe. Then I usually tell them why I am a Christian. "I'm a Christian because of Gods amazing love for me, not because I am a sinner, not because I'm worried about going to hell, but because God created me I appreciate the fact that I'm even alive, and for that God deserves my worship. I honor God by having a relationship with His son Jesus Christ."

Then I follow that by asking them if there is anything really tough going on in their life.

"Dave, is there anything going on in your life that is really tough to deal with? Stress from work, an upcoming test at school, a girlfriend problem, because I would like to pray for you."
"Right now?"
"If you want, or if not I can pray for you later."
"Well, I don't think so.../Yeah work problems (or whatever)"

Either pray for him, or If he isn't interested tell him that it was really nice talking to him and you hope he has a good day.

Voila! You have just witnessed to someone without turning them off to God. You didn't even have to call him a sinner.

The essence of God is his love. Grace is important. There is no doubt about that, but what people need is to see that God loves them and wants them. Get people thinking about Jesus, let them see God's amazing love in you, and repentance will follow. Tell people about God's love and perfection and they will soon realize their own shortcomings and imperfections.

Love in Christ,
John

Man, you totally rock The YOU ARE A SINNER approach is what has put off most people in my school and made them really hostile towards me because they assume I'm going to take the same approach.

 

[Prayer_Warrior83]

First and foremost, this post is not meant to offend anyone, it is meant to give you a different perspective.

I have been witnessed to in many different ways, from people holding up signs of pictures of "hell" to being shouted at and being told I'm a sinner and need to repent or risk eternal damnation, to the now very popular list of questions "have you ever stolen, have you ever lied... etc". I am here to tell you that almost all of these methods turn people off. Let me tell you what goes through the mind of the average person who is approached by one of these "you are a sinner" method witnesses... "Oh crap, now I have to deal with this idiot" They are turned off from the begining.

Being a witness is not so simple that you can walk up to someone, ask/tell them that they are a sinner, tell them that god will forgive them and move on... The average person thinks of this as a minor inturruption in their day.

Some guidelines...first and foremost stop telling people they are sinners. How would you like it if someone walked up to you and told you that you are a terrible person? Telling people that they are inherently bad people right off the bat is a great way to make them tune out to everything you say after that. An alternative? Walk up to someone and see if you can ask them a few questions...

"Hi I'm John, Would you mind if I asked you a few questions?"
"Sure"
"First, Whats your name?"
"Dave"
"Nice to meet you Dave"
"Dave, would you consider yourself religious?"

Now here is where you actually have to start using your brain...

"No, I'm an athiest, or yes I'm Hindu (or whatever)?"
"Would you mind telling me a little about why you don't believe in God?/Why you believe in your religion?"
"Sure, I dont believe in god because of 'X'"

Listen to what he/she has to say. People actually do have reasons for what they believe. Then I usually tell them why I am a Christian. "I'm a Christian because of Gods amazing love for me, not because I am a sinner, not because I'm worried about going to hell, but because God created me I appreciate the fact that I'm even alive, and for that God deserves my worship. I honor God by having a relationship with His son Jesus Christ."

Then I follow that by asking them if there is anything really tough going on in their life.

"Dave, is there anything going on in your life that is really tough to deal with? Stress from work, an upcoming test at school, a girlfriend problem, because I would like to pray for you."
"Right now?"
"If you want, or if not I can pray for you later."
"Well, I don't think so.../Yeah work problems (or whatever)"

Either pray for him, or If he isn't interested tell him that it was really nice talking to him and you hope he has a good day.

Voila! You have just witnessed to someone without turning them off to God. You didn't even have to call him a sinner.

The essence of God is his love. Grace is important. There is no doubt about that, but what people need is to see that God loves them and wants them. Get people thinking about Jesus, let them see God's amazing love in you, and repentance will follow. Tell people about God's love and perfection and they will soon realize their own shortcomings and imperfections.

Love in Christ,
John

I've also put this principle into action, and while it does have it's uses by allowing people to experience God's grace, it also has pitfalls which have made me seriously question both it's practicality and biblical validity.

Most often those who are likely to respond are the down and out with actual plights that obviously need assistance. But at the same time, you get Joe Average who from the looks of things does need help, but just doesn't want it, not to mention Jane Has-it-all whom based upon her physical appearance and the extra-high self esteem she expresses causes you to automatically think that there isn't really anything more that can be added to her already abundant life.
I've approached people with utmost loving concern and have them respond to me harshly by saying "Who are you to say that my life is rubbish? How would you feel if I walked up to you and said 'Hi there, based on how you look, I'd say that your life must be pretty stupid, can I kindly offer some advice on how you can fix it?' [insert expletive here]-off!"
But the truth is, are Joe Average and Jane Has-It-All any less requiring of salvation through Christ than Greg Has-Needs?
No.

Secondly, for those that were open towards prayer, it was absolutely necessary to give a full gospel presentation of explaining moral Law, having them admit the specific sins they have committed, God's righteousness and justice, and Christ crucified. Why? Because unless they themselves as non-christians are under the direction of the Holy Spirit that leads to the beginning of faith in god being planted in their hearts, how can you really be sure that the "God" they're opening their hearts to is the same God as Christianity? The Bible makes it clear about this regarding a non-christians relationship (or actual lack thereof) with God:

10As it is written:
"There is no one righteous, not even one;
11there is no one who understands,
no one who seeks God.
12All have turned away,
they have together become worthless;
there is no one who does good,
not even one."
13"Their throats are open graves;
their tongues practice deceit."
"The poison of vipers is on their lips."
14"Their mouths are full of cursing and bitterness."
15"Their feet are swift to shed blood;
16ruin and misery mark their ways,
17and the way of peace they do not know."
18"There is no fear of God before their eyes."

Romans 3:10-18

Where in the Bible do you find Christ or his diciples expressing the awesome Grace of God to someone who was not yet prepared for it first?

Do not give dogs what is sacred; do not throw your pearls to pigs. If you do, they may trample them under their feet, and then turn and tear you to pieces.

Matthew 7:6

(Note: This isn't post intended as a criticism, I'm just reporting on my own experiences using the same method)

 

[CandleLightSky]

Simply saying God loves them can lead to worse consequences if they don't really understand HOW(Died on the cross) he showed that and WHY(Sin). If you stick to the fluff then they will only expect fluff, so when the bad stuff happens in life they think where's God and are 'turned off' as you say. It's the "I tried it once and it didn't work" people.

I don't reccomend screaming at people and telling them they are sinners or anything like that but it's all about how you do it, and there are good and bad ways--Do you want people to understand the Gospel or go away feeling better about themselves? You can do it in a way that is personable but still gets the message across.

 

[Sharky]

Never give the gospel to a proud, arrogant self righteous person. Doing so, you will 'gospel - harden' them which makes them even harder to get through to.

Also never go around telling people about hell without FIRST using the Law or use that cliche "you're a sinner you're going to hell." and please don't scream or raise your voice (unless you're open air preaching) it's just intimidating no matter how good the news is.

Use the Law, show them they have sinned then warn them about hell. If they're humble, you tell them about God's grace and mercy. If they're proud, you walk away or if need be, give it to them and run off (sometimes a proud person might be humble inside and was afraid to show it somehow).

And don't say that i'm 'doing more damage than good' because i've used this for a whole year to at least 1 person a day and find such accusations are completely false. Many who accuse me of this have not done so themselves thus their arguments are not supported.

Accusations like that are fuled by the fear of telling people about hell and concern for their reaction for why should God send anyone to hell? Indeed no one will know until you show them the Law and have them see why.

 

[NotEnoughFaith2BeAtheist]

Good word

 

[Tenebrae]

The essence of God is his love. Grace is important. There is no doubt about that, but what people need is to see that God loves them and wants them. Get people thinking about Jesus, let them see God's amazing love in you, and repentance will follow.

Love in Christ,
John

To quote St Francis of assis... "Preach the gospel always, and if need be use words". In other words, your actions will always be far more powerful than the words you speak

 

[Sharky]

I have to disagree on that quote completely.

It's exactly what satan is saying. "Don't worry about sharing your faith, your actions will say it all."

Friend, speaking your faith is more important. Speaking and actions should go together but the real sowing of the seed comes from speech, not from actions.

People are afraid to speak and it's understandable. But practice and you'll get it right. Actions are important but it doesn't bring anyone to Christ (of course there are exceptions).

 

[Tenebrae]

I have to disagree on that quote completely.

It's exactly what satan is saying. "Don't worry about sharing your faith, your actions will say it all."

Friend, speaking your faith is more important. Speaking and actions should go together but the real sowing of the seed comes from speech, not from actions.

People are afraid to speak and it's understandable. But practice and you'll get it right. Actions are important but it doesn't bring anyone to Christ (of course there are exceptions).

You talking to me? You have a far better chance of reaching someone for christ, if you take the time to walk along side them, and get to know them and gradually speak biblical truths into their lives than flat out preaching at them


as a former witch I can recall the christians who made a lasting impression, werent the ones who preached and told me what a dirty rotten sinner I was and how hell bound I was. Hey I was a witch I didnt belive in the concept of hell... them I just laughed at them and dismissed anything that they said. They werent interested in me, just condemming and judging. The ones who made the best impression, were christians who had been with me a long time, who offered a non judgemental ear when I needed it, and who as time went by spoke about what they believed in...

Agreed, actions arent anything, but there is a time for action and a time for silence, and a person led by the spirit, knows which is called for...

 

[Prayer_Warrior83]

This is what Charles Spurgeon had to say:

"Ho, ho, sir surgeon, you are too delicate to tell the man that he is ill! You hope to heal the sick without their knowing it. You therefore flatter them; and what happens? They laugh at you; they dance upon their own graves. At last they die! Your delicacy is cruelty; your flatteries are poisons; you are a murderer.
Shall we keep men in a fool's paradise? Shall we lull them into soft slumbers from which they will awake in hell? Are we to become helpers of their damnation by our smooth speeches?

In the name of God we will not!"

 

[CandleLightSky]

This is what Charles Spurgeon had to say:

"Ho, ho, sir surgeon, you are too delicate to tell the man that he is ill! You hope to heal the sick without their knowing it. You therefore flatter them; and what happens? They laugh at you; they dance upon their own graves. At last they die! Your delicacy is cruelty; your flatteries are poisons; you are a murderer.
Shall we keep men in a fool's paradise? Shall we lull them into soft slumbers from which they will awake in hell? Are we to become helpers of their damnation by our smooth speeches?

In the name of God we will not!"

I love Charle's Spurgeon....he's cool like that.

 

[janny108]

There are so many great points in this post, that it is hard to to narrow it down to the most important one. But I think that this says it all:



God loves ALL people. We are ALL His children.

God created all people but not all are His children. People have to be saved to be one of God's children. If they were, why would they need to be witnessed to?

Jan

 

[clonenomore]

God created all people but not all are His children. People have to be saved to be one of God's children. If they were, why would they need to be witnessed to?

Jan

All right, I've stayed out of this discussion for awhile because I had made my point and I didn't want to casue any more disagreements within the Body. But, respectfully, I have to disagree with this statement. I stand by my original statement that we are ALL God's children. Let me try to explain:

I have a son. He grows up to be a criminal. He's still my son -- even though I will continue to try to get him to change his ways. He will always be my son -- even if he goes to jail for his crimes. No matter what -- he is MY SON!

That's the way God sees us. We are ALL His children -- even though we do bad things and don't listen. Why do I think this? God convicted me while I was reading Jonah. Most people know who Jonah was. He was a religious bigot who was called by God to go to Ninevah to preach -- a city where people did not believe as Jonah believed. Jonah ran the other way and jumped a boat to the other side of the world. God, not one to relent, sent a storm to toss the boat around. So Jonah got blamed for the storm, got tossed overboard into the ocean, got swallowed by a big fish, changed his mind, was vomited onto the beach, and finally went to Ninevah. Even though he finally relented to follow God' command, he only did so halfway. Even so, God used Jonah to bring folks into the Kingdom. Jonah got mad that God didn't smite them down. What did God say to Jonah in Jonah 4:11?

In that city of Nineveh there are more than a hundred twenty thousand people who cannot tell right from wrong, and many cattle are also there. Don't you think I should be concerned about that big city? (CEV)

God is concerned about all of us. All people matter to God because we are ALL His children. Some of us just act up more than others.

Again, this disagreement is in love and I do not want to start an argument.

 

[CandleLightSky]

Those who don't serve God are Children of wrath and disobedience:

Among whom also we all had our conversation in times past in the lusts of our flesh, fulfilling the desires of the flesh and of the mind; and were by nature the children of wrath, even as others.
(Ephesians 2:3)

Let no man deceive you with vain words: for because of these things cometh the wrath of God upon the children of disobedience.
(Ephesians 5:6)

To become a child of God you must recieve Christ, in order to become a son you must recieve him as scripture says:

But as many as received him, to them gave he power to become the sons of God, even to them that believe on his name:
(John 1:12)

Those who follow after their own lusts have a Father in the devil himself and are by nature children of wrath:

Ye are of your father the devil, and the lusts of your father ye will do. He was a murderer from the beginning, and abode not in the truth, because..., he speaketh of his own: for he is a liar, and the father of it.
(John 8:44)