I understand that.
I had a child at a young age. My stepmother told me something I never forgot. She said people will promise you the world. They mean well. But that's your responsibility. And she was right.
Dependency is fine when you're dealing with healthy people who are loving and compassionate. Nevertheless, you can't put all your eggs in one basket. You need to build a life for you and the children. The obvious solution isn't always the best.
Use this period while they're young to lay the foundation for tomorrow. Finish school. Make it a priority. So you're not relying on a man or someone else to help you make ends meet. You need to be independent.
Meet with social services and tell them your situation. Be honest. They can help you apply for a housing voucher. If you're a full-time student you don't pay any rent. There's a loophole. Use the programs as they're intended. You can't change them. Love them and leave them in His care and move on.
~bella
I was thinking of thisOpen an on line bank account and pay money in each pay day.
On being asked for cash help give what you can from your normal bank account.
That way saving up to a quarter of your pay will quickly enable you to be able to move out.
Submit yourself under the mighty hand of God and He will exalt you in due time. If not in this life, then in the life to come.
In the meantime, people's mistreatment of us is an opportunity to show them the kindness of our Father.
The Lpn program is a year I thought i could atleast stay home for a year but after that I said no and moving is now more important. Much more. Ill just get into a cheap apt. Thats all i can do right now.
I was thinking of this
I try to be kind. When my dad calls me names or makes me late to work i let him use my car. When my mom does what she does i try to be cordial.
It just makes it hard to trust God when it seems like he wants me to suffer and not be happy at all.
I camt do that i have to bc i also need to get to work and now my gas will be out again.I suggest stop filling your car up. Merely put enough in to get to work, home again and back to a filling station. That and hide the keys.
My home situation isnt good at all. I try my hardest in my own strength to do what i can to move. I work, i search out the apt, set money aside, but Im.now realizing i habe really toxic parents.
Im always obligated to help financially and dont have much to save and rarely get paid back.
Im not respected at home.
Not as mother or in general ( see threads-- brother threw toy at my baby and my mom let my daughter sit in poop bc she was mad at me) if i try to stand up for myself and children Im threatened with being put out.
Food I buy gets eaten, everyone drives my car, i put gas in but it comes back empty my dad argued with me last week abt why he doesnt need to put gas in.
Yet when I find a guy who I think would be a good partner and try to move in with him to leave my parents. God gives me warnings ...so thats not his will either.
Does God really want me to stay with toxic people that disrespect me on the daily bases? Why doesnt God want me to leave? Why doesnt he help me ( I do all i can to help myself such as working ect.. Then my parents sabatoge my job or something crazy like my car getting wrecked in an accident happens. I have no friends to room with..)
It just makes it hard to trust God when it seems like he wants me to suffer and not be happy at all. Ive never got the desires of my heart even when serving God.
So much is wrong with all of this. Stop assuming im.not doing anything. Ive search gov housing theyre all on waitlists and closed. As for acting in a way that warrants respect-- should i treat my parents the way they treat me bc im not rude towards them.Is it God's fault when you give money to people you know won't pay you back? Is it God's fault you have chosen to remain with your toxic parents?
Is this God's fault? Generally, if you don't act in a way that warrants respect, you don't get it.
Is there no co-op housing, or government-assisted housing you can move to? Have you researched housing options such as these in your area?
It's your car. If you don't establish inflexible boundaries for its use you shouldn't be surprised when people take advantage of its use. If your Dad won't fill the tank when he empties it, he doesn't get to use the car. Simple. It's your car; you make the rules about it. It's not God's fault if you won't do so.
It is sin to live with a man prior to marriage to him. God does not bless those who willfully choose to disobey Him.
Maybe He's giving you an opportunity to learn to set boundaries with others in your relationships with them. Maybe He's giving you opportunity to make better choices about men than you've been making. Maybe the problem isn't on God's side of things.
God didn't make you to pursue your own desires, but His. He gives you the desires of your heart when your desires reflect His. Nothing you've described in your OP suggests your heart and God's are properly aligned.
What's more, God resists those who aren't living in submission to Him every day. Until we put ourselves under His authority all the time, we are living in rebellion to Him and so He opposes us, withholding blessing until we submit to Him - sincerely - throughout every day.
James 4:2-10
2 ... You do not have, because you do not ask.
3 You ask and do not receive, because you ask wrongly, to spend it on your passions.
4 You adulterous people! Do you not know that friendship with the world is enmity with God? Therefore whoever wishes to be a friend of the world makes himself an enemy of God.
5 Or do you suppose it is to no purpose that the Scripture says, “He yearns jealously over the spirit that he has made to dwell in us”?
6 But he gives more grace. Therefore it says, “God opposes the proud, but gives grace to the humble.”
7 Submit yourselves therefore to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you.
8 Draw near to God, and he will draw near to you. Cleanse your hands, you sinners, and purify your hearts, you double-minded.
9 Be wretched and mourn and weep. Let your laughter be turned to mourning and your joy to gloom.
10 Humble yourselves before the Lord, and he will exalt you.
I prayerfully hope this helps:Does God really want me to stay with toxic people that disrespect me on the daily bases? Why doesnt God want me to leave? Why doesnt he help me ( I do all i can to help myself such as working ect.. Then my parents sabatoge my job or something crazy like my car getting wrecked in an accident happens. I have no friends to room with..)
It just makes it hard to trust God when it seems like he wants me to suffer and not be happy at all. Ive never got the desires of my heart even when serving God. I never got friends that stick closer than a brother. Someone that isnt messed up or as toxic as my parents to love and be loved by. Im not asking for a million dollars just simple things and now I just want to get away from my parents.
Im working and trying to save but it seems fruitless.
So much is wrong with all of this. Stop assuming im.not doing anything. Ive search gov housing theyre all on waitlists and closed. As for acting in a way that warrants respect-- should i treat my parents the way they treat me bc im not rude towards them.
Again i made boundaries my dad started arguing with me. Now what should i do? Cuss him out?will that make him respect me?
All that will lead to is me being thrown out not smart at all.
I tried to move earlier. My son got sick with what Drs thought was cancer then my car was wrecked.
My lord have some sort of empathy. All youre doing is arguing.
Im not in a good space mentally your advice isnt helpful at all. Please refrain from replying right now. Thank You.Not arguing; asking questions and making observations. I'm not going to join you in blaming God and you shouldn't expect any believer to do so. Your problems are never God's fault.
Could u guys keep me in your prayers. I broke up eith my bf again and it truly wasnt easy bc i felt like he loved me more than my family.
I feel sick.
My observation is you sound like Job’s friends who were condemning Job all day long for questioning God about his senseless suffering, and God said his friends needed to repent.
My observation is you sound like Job’s friends who were condemning Job all day long for questioning God about his senseless suffering, and God said his friends needed to repent.
Not really, i think otherwise. The OP raised some questions which he/she responded to based on scriptures e.g. moving in with a man she isn't married to. It's quite hard to pass an opposing response across without seeming harsh but we know he/she responded based on love. I think if the OP simply requests for prayers it would be best, no need to blame God for decisions we make(this may offend other believers) but we can get solutions
through prayers. God bless
Thank you. Im not blaming God at all. I kno. Good portion if this is my fault. Im just asking where is God now. Thats all. Im just not going to share my issues here anymore. I do it bc i genuinely have no one else to talk to but i know better now.I read the OP’s post too, and I don’t see a God blaming attitude anywhere in there. The OP is confused and shaken in faith because the situation is not getting better, and wonders why God is silent, a perfectly reasonable response in abuse victims. Where then is the love and sympathy? Is not offending you more important than the OP’s need for encouragement?
If blaming God is an offense to believers, the book of Job is full of such offences. Did you not read that Job even asked God if it pleases Him to oppress him? (Job 10:3) Job was questioning God’s justice and righteousness, and the entire time he ascribed his suffering to God. His friends on the other hand, spoke up for God and condemned Job for his God-blaming. Yet God said his friends were the ones who were wrong and in need of repentance.
Not really, i think otherwise. The OP raised some questions which he/she responded to based on scriptures e.g. moving in with a man she isn't married to. It's quite hard to pass an opposing response across without seeming harsh but we know he/she responded based on love. I think if the OP simply requests for prayers it would be best, no need to blame God for decisions we make(this may offend other believers) but we can get solutions
through prayers. God bless
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