How do you "send the signal?"

[memoriesbymichelle]

No, that's actually perfectly okay. Some guys find shyness to be a challenge. And you know how us guys just loooove a challenge

OK so what does it mean when a guy tells you, you need to be more of a challenge?

 

[justaGUYnamedROB]

OK so what does it mean when a guy tells you, you need to be more of a challenge?

That's just somebody's totally subjective opinion about what a "challenge" really is. It's different for different people.

Remember the movie "Rocky?" Remember how Adrian was? Totally shy, backwards, and to herself? To Rocky, the challenge she presented was "getting her to come out of her shell." Some other random guy may have just found her to be a total bore. If the shoe fits...

Think about the married people that you know. Are they all "a certain way?," or do they "fit the mold?" The ones who I know are just as varied as the sands on the seashore, shy ones and all. I don't think stuff like that happens by accident. I think people should just be who they are and let God work out the rest.

 

[atuck00]

If I could stop acting the way I do when around a guy I like, I totally would! I crack under pressure. I'm a completely confident person with friends, but that romantic pressure makes me clam up into a self-conscious girl who masks it in any way possible. I am working on being more forward and confident!

 

[JPPT1974]

Tell me about it as I am really
Shy in front of guys
Sometimes I crack under pressure
More than my share.

 

[memoriesbymichelle]

That's just somebody's totally subjective opinion about what a "challenge" really is. It's different for different people.

Remember the movie "Rocky?" Remember how Adrian was? Totally shy, backwards, and to herself? To Rocky, the challenge she presented was "getting her to come out of her shell." Some other random guy may have just found her to be a total bore. If the shoe fits...

Think about the married people that you know. Are they all "a certain way?," or do they "fit the mold?" The ones who I know are just as varied as the sands on the seashore, shy ones and all. I don't think stuff like that happens by accident. I think people should just be who they are and let God work out the rest.

Well OK but that doesn't really help me much. My son-in-law is divorcing my step daughter. The woman he is currently involved with is in love with him. She is a very sweet lady and very kind hearted and will do anything he likes to do. So if he says "hey lets go here or there" she says OK lets go. And she's also beautiful, very slender and has a very nice house, makes great money.
He told her she needed to be more of a challenge for him, and she doesn't know what that means. My step daughter is involved with another man, which caused them to split up (she left my sil for the other man). On one hand he says he likes that he can do whatever he wants and there's no stress like there was when he was with my step daughter, but I don't know what the heck he means by be more of a challenge either. I told her to kick him to the curb, but I doubt she will. Any thoughts?

 

[sweetlambofgod]

If I could stop acting the way I do when around a guy I like, I totally would! I crack under pressure. I'm a completely confident person with friends, but that romantic pressure makes me clam up into a self-conscious girl who masks it in any way possible. I am working on being more forward and confident!

that sounds just like me

 

[sweetlambofgod]

I wither flirt like crazy or am really shy!

 

[memoriesbymichelle]

Hey justaguynamedrob,

Are you considering an answer to my post?

 

[violetpen]

I'm very shy, especially in large groups, and usually don't try to consciously send signals. However, if I like someone, I tend to laugh more at their jokes, watch them but don't meet their eyes (and blush if I happen to), and mirror their movements. I'm guessing this probably lets everyone in the room BUT the person know I like him!

 

[ecuison]

Wow! Unfortunately I have been told after the fact that women were putting cues on for me and I was just to dumb to pick up on them. I am too shy even if the woman has an interest in me. I end up losing out in the end all the time.

~Ed

 

[warriorofprayer]

I am a very straight forward person and tell it like it is. Around someone I like, I get a glow on my face. Talking about someone I like, I get a glow on my face, and you usually cannot shut me up. So if I babble around or about a man, odds are, I like him. Can't say I "love" him, but like him.

Now, it is just to get the guy to see the signal.

 

[Manda_24]

I'll try to stand around the guy I like a lot more than anyone else or try to be on his team for something. With the guy I like now I somehow keep ending up being his partner when we play cornhole (or bags depending on where you're from).
I will also smile a lot more and it's usually a special smile that I don't give anyone else, I guess I kinda glow in a way. My roommate was looking at some old pictures of mine one day and she asked me if I liked the guy I was having my picture with because I smiled different than I did in any of the other pictures with my guy friends.
Let's see, I also try to start up a conversation with him and just try to find out more about him if I don't know him well. And there may be a little teasing that goes on too.

 

[LonesomeTexan]

I play footsies. HAHA

 

[LetHimThatGlories]

I met a woman once who kept laughing and touching my knee while we talked. That's a pretty obvious way of sending a signal to any guy, I would think. But usually those kinds of girls aren't Chrisitians. She must have thought that I was really dense, or something, since I ignored it.

I give out inadvertent signals. I'm normally friendly/polite with any girl, but if I like her in some way, I'll tend to get nervous around her, and find that I don't have a whole lot to say. If I have something in my hands, I'll fiddle with it, put it down, pick it up, move it, move it back again, pick it up, put it away, take it back out again, etc...it would be obvous that I don't know what to do with my hands. I'll be indecisive. It's also 10:46 p.m. I'm going to bed.

 

[sweetlambofgod]

I met a woman once who kept laughing and touching my knee while we talked. That's a pretty obvious way of sending a signal to any guy, I would think. But usually those kinds of girls aren't Chrisitians. She must have thought that I was really dense, or something, since I ignored it.

I give out inadvertent signals. I'm normally friendly/polite with any girl, but if I like her in some way, I'll tend to get nervous around her, and find that I don't have a whole lot to say. If I have something in my hands, I'll fiddle with it, put it down, pick it up, move it, move it back again, pick it up, put it away, take it back out again, etc...it would be obvous that I don't know what to do with my hands. I'll be indecisive. It's also 10:46 p.m. I'm going to bed.

christians can't touch your knee?

 

[LonesomeTexan]

christians can't touch your knee?

no. that's way too sexy. God forbid she accidentally touch your thigh or butt. I can't imagine a girl being so racey. Must be work of the devil. haha just messin with ya LHTG. seriously though, it's a knee, not a your crotch.

 

[sweetlambofgod]

no. that's way too sexy. God forbid she accidentally touch your thigh or butt. I can't imagine a girl being so racey. Must be work of the devil. haha just messin with ya LHTG. seriously though, it's a knee, not a your crotch.

LOL

 

[sampa]

..... Talking about someone I like, I get a glow on my face, and you usually cannot shut me up. So if I babble around or about a man, odds are, I like him. Can't say I "love" him, but like him.

Now, it is just to get the guy to see the signal.

Warrior I sometimes get the same. My talking has gotten me into trouble in the past because they weren't Christian. I'd babble on to friends about what someone said and we'd nitpick at what it could be...this could just be me, but this only fed my wandering thoughts and attraction. Joyce Meyers has a good book called Battlefield of the Mind that is probably good for any area of thought life.

But if he's a Christian, still I think this is an area I need to control better and be more reserved, because my thoughts can get way ahead of where things really are....if this makes any sense?

But I guess this thread is talking about how to send a signal....sorry to steer away from the topic.

I met a woman once who kept laughing and touching my knee while we talked. That's a pretty obvious way of sending a signal to any guy, I would think. .......

They could be Christian, LetHimThatGlorifies, but not aware of what their doing. I'm not a touchy person and it definitely might get a rise out of me, like a guy touching my waist or placing his hand on my shoulder if I'm attracted to him, maybe even not. Sometimes it may have to do with sense of space, but I think if you don't know the person that well, it really might seem like they like you. But I always think, if they did this so quickly with me, then they must do this with many women/men.

 

[LetHimThatGlories]

christians can't touch your knee?

Of course not. Good grief. j/k

I've just never seen a Christian girl do this. It's always been the non-Christian ones, and ones that I barely know at all. It usually doesn't stop there, either, even if I ignore her (Gee, what is it, it's not like I'm God's gift to women or anything).

By the way, if some girl wants to touch my knee, hey, she can do that all she wants. I don't care.

 

[sweetlambofgod]

Of course not. Good grief. j/k

I've just never seen a Christian girl do this. It's always been the non-Christian ones, and ones that I barely know at all. It usually doesn't stop there, either, even if I ignore her (Gee, what is it, it's not like I'm God's gift to women or anything).

By the way, if some girl wants to touch my knee, hey, she can do that all she wants. I don't care.

really? Thats crazy, I'm a very touchy/feely kinda gal!