He's UGLY but GORGEOUS?! What do I do?

[jenniferkat]

I would most certainly say this one you speak of is highly unique and is absolutely gorgeous and highly intelligent. This one should be in the movies and on tv! This most privilege one should be on television for all to adore and love! It is a sin to hide such beauty from the world.

Don't listen to you evil sister and rude make believe scams (you) they are just very wicked and jealous of real natural divine beauty inside and out. Tell them to get their eyes checked out before making such prejudice claims about such a beautiful person God loves and highly favors. Could be when they eventually behold this beauty someday on tv their prejudice personalities will need to seek out some medical care right away before it's too late for them.

They (ha ha) are so manipulative and are so nervous they (you) have to tell others by lying and saying this beautiful person is ugly which is going to turn out to be your ruins.

I enjoyed this thread so much that I made a copy. LOL LOL

 

[Kid Fish]

If this guy were say deformed in some way, or disfigured from a fire but he was a wonderful person, would it still be considered fair game to dismiss him due to his looks? I mean, how atrocious would that be?

Looks fade, accidents happen, and some people are just not all that attractive to begin with. If you base your judgement on what anyone thinks of his looks, you are not living up to your true self, because if you don't care that he's no Johnny Depp, why the hell would you care what anyone else thinks?

 

[itpro4470]

I'd say meet him... In a public place, see what kind of guy he is. If there are sparks then go for it if not then keep saying you're busy until he stops trying If you're not attracted to someone because of their looks then don't go with them. If you marry someone you have to wake up next to that person every day for the rest of your life they should look good to you. It seems shallow but we all have our own preferences some people only like skinny people some people only like fat people some like bald people some like tall people etc... don't feel bad for him there are 6 billion of us someone is going to like him eventually as long as he keeps looking. You're only 18 you have plenty of time to look find the one thats for you.

 

[Bain_Adaneth]

Hi brothers and sisters in Christ

Im an 18 year old girl, and a month back, me and another 18 yo christian guy formed a strong friendship over facebook via constant emailing and chatting. We have become very close and his personality is ideal for me.

We have strong feelings for each other and have decided to meet up to get to know each other better. (This is purely for marriage potentially, we're not playing around). However I have seen his pictures and (no offence to him at all) he is not so good looking (below average).

My sister saw his photos and came to me protesting, saying 'You're so beautiful you could do so much better' and telling me he looks 'very very bad' and stuff.

I don't know what to do guys?! Do I meet him and give it a go, or find another good christian guy who looks average at least? Looks aren't important, yes, but when the person is considerably below average...well.....

Thanks in advance!! God Bless

Do not be so prideful, or you will stumble in your pride like the devil did.
God gave you those looks, no need to be prideful over them.
I've seen too many prideful people lose what they have, because they were too prideful.

Then again, I guess you should reconsider and pause your search for a while. Because obviously you are not seeking with unconditional love, but you sort of have a physical requirement.

Let unconditional love guide you. Nothing is higher and lasts longer in marriage than unconditional love.

 

[Vollkommen Warrior]

You have to be physically attracted or it doesnt work.

 

[One day at a time]

I would agree with if you meet--meet somewhere public. Definitely don't commit to anything beyond friendship to begin with and make that known to him beforehand. If he still agrees to meet you take it from there.
Don't rush into anything--you still have so much of your life to live. You say that looks aren't important but then you keep saying he is below average....which probably means that you doubt something. The heart is what is most important and only you and God can know that. Definitely pray over the matter. As my mom always told me growing up "If you doubt--don't!"
I'll pray for you as you decide what to do. Keep us posted.

 

[vespasia]

Everyones looks fade and crumble for the beauty of youth is fleeting BUT a good character, a kind personality a relationship founded in friendship, Christ and shared common grounds of what is important to you both now that can last against all the ebb and flows this live on Earth brings.

You can marry a 'good looking' man whose inner self is vile and ugly and regret it within weeks.

[Do follow the good advice on keeping yourself safe when meeting someone you only know over the internet for the first time though]

 

[janny108]

If you are 18 why are you interested in meeting guys over the internet? If you do meet him, meet him as a friend only and in public which folks have said and with friends nearby. Don't assume you won't feel anything other than friendship tho; it's much too early to decide that.
Jan

 

[seashale76]

Have you considered the possibility that he just might not be photogenic? It could be a completely different story in person.

 

[sweet_gal]

Thankyou to all the lovely people who replied and gave me advice!! I read every single one and I value all your input.

We have confessed over chat that we feel for each other (he is the most Godly person I know and we've had conversations on msn that lasted hours simply talking about God and our love for him). We've exchanged numbers and will meet up in a months time at a public resteraunt.

I was introduced to him through a friend. And you're right, I dont care about the looks anymore...his personality is far too good=) He has also told me he would like to meet my family to introduce himself You advice tremendously helped in reaching a decision. Thankyou brothers and sisters in Christ!!

 

[jenniferkat]

"PLEASE BE AWARE THIS GUY IS NOT A FAKE." THAT'S FOR SURE!


"My sisters just told me she would have trouble coming to my wedding if I married someone like that =("



What EVEN makes them think they would be invited?! LOL LOL

 

[snowfall]

Please meet him with a few of your friends or even your Mom for your safety regardless if you know him from a friend,if he respects you he will understand.I hope your meet up goes great.....As for looks,as long as he treats you with respect and he has good hygene and clean stylish clothing,looks do fade.And most men get better looking with age while women lose there looks..Sounds like a nice guy

 

[live4grace]

Watch "Beauty and the Beast" a few times. The story is not just about looks but about redemption. Then realize that we are all beasts till the Lord redeems us and we're molded into the image of Jesus. His beauty is on the inside, the only place it matters.

(Hint: It sounds like your sister is wrong.)

 

[jenniferkat]

Wondering what occurred to these two?

This thread provokes much inside of my heart!

 

[jenniferkat]

God is Great!

 

[freeport]

Hi brothers and sisters in Christ

Im an 18 year old girl, and a month back, me and another 18 yo christian guy formed a strong friendship over facebook via constant emailing and chatting. We have become very close and his personality is ideal for me.

We have strong feelings for each other and have decided to meet up to get to know each other better. (This is purely for marriage potentially, we're not playing around). However I have seen his pictures and (no offence to him at all) he is not so good looking (below average).

My sister saw his photos and came to me protesting, saying 'You're so beautiful you could do so much better' and telling me he looks 'very very bad' and stuff.

I don't know what to do guys?! Do I meet him and give it a go, or find another good christian guy who looks average at least? Looks aren't important, yes, but when the person is considerably below average...well.....

Thanks in advance!! God Bless

I didn't like my eldest daughter's boyfriend initially because she is so gorgeous and he wasn't. Well, there were other factors. But, he sticks by her, actually treats her like a queen. Drives her around, does anything she says. They have been together awhile. What can I say?

And he actually isn't ugly, just not stunning as she is.

The biggest thing people get into in our society tends to be problems with weight. That can be lost or gained. Guys can beef up or lose excess weight. That is temporary. Also people can not get right hair cuts or know how to dress and such. That also can change.

Otherwise, apart from those basics, people tend to be pretty decent looking and truly "ugly" people are very far and few between. Relationships definitely are about hearts, not looks.

Only remaining concern I would have is: is he married? Because I could see where someone might say something else to cover that up.

Unfortunately, people lie and can be charming online or even in person. That is the main danger.

Claiming one's self is "ugly" could be a way to make someone think, "Oh that is the drawback to this person"... when there is really far worse problems underlying.

So, don't be naive.

But, don't judge someone because they are "ugly" either.

 

[Thir7ySev3n]

Also, it's worth noting that some people do not photograph well for whatever reason and you might be surprised.

I know this is true, especially for me, and I hate it so much. If you saw most of my pictures you would probobly think less of me in that regard than you do of him, I look nothing at all like I do in my pictures. One girl who saw my picture said she thought I was ugly, but when she saw me in person she went over to my mom and emphatically said I was hot. So give him a chance and meet him in person, although I would definitely agree with the others who said to go with a few friends, just to be safe. And I would not say it is shallow of you to not want to be with someone because of physical appearance because that is a big part of that kind of relationship is the attraction, and if attraction and looks were completely unimportant in this regard, God would not have even made us with the capacity to be attracted, or with all the diverse looks each one of us has. Obviously, looks are not everything, and looks should be secondary to godliness, you should always concern yourself first with godly character and then with physical attraction. So if there are two equally godly men and one is more atrractive to you, obviously the one you're more atrracted to would be the better choice. But again, give the guy a chance and see how things go.

 

[GQ Chris]

Do you mind that he's not as attractive as you would like?

 

[GQ Chris]

Can you see yourself making out with this man? That might be the test...

 

[GQ Chris]

Maybe he can be considered "pocket handsome", does he have a lot of cash do you know?