Heroin Addict Husband

[laura0204]

My husband of just over 2 years became addicted to using Vicodin 1 month into our marriage. After two stints in rehab and countless promises to quit, he has moved on to Heroin. We are currently separated and he has vowed he is clean after about 4 months of extreme Heroin use. He says he is now about 5 weeks clean, cold turkey. We began talking again and trying to work things out, BUT, recently on Monday, I had no contact with him and he somewhat dissapeared for the day, a small amount of money (some spare change)was missing from his father's room (where he is currently living) he came home around 1:30 am. Past experience tells me he is using again, but then he got up and went to work again in the morning, and carried on like normal for the rest of the day. From what I understand if he was on Heroin he would have been pretty much out if he used the night before. I don't see any new track marks(just the ones that are healing) on his arms, but he was itching alot and sniffling. Does anyone have any input, he says he was not using, just out with a friend. Sorry this is so long! Any advice would be helpful. He wants to go to counseling but we're flat broke, he feels NA is out right now because in the past he had a hard time with it, he says all they talk about is using, and he wants to forget that for a while.
Anyway.. Help!

 

[joslinbe3]

Hugs. I don't know if he is using again or not, but it IS very hard to quit cold turkey and not be in some type of recovery program. Just keep praying for him!

 

[AngelDove1]

Why don't you go to al-anon?
He is making excuses to not go for help in NA.

If he was serious he would go,no matter what.I went to NA,and AA.....

I went for myself,and to find winners there that would help me.....
Guess what? I was serious and I found winners that helped me.

Right now you need to concentrate on getting help for yourself.
Al-anon is a great start.

If he is sincere he'll go get help.
If not ...he's only fooling himself.
And messing with your head.
Addicts are good at that.

Prayin 4 U

 

[laura0204]

Thank you so much for the encouragement and advice! I am going to talk with him seriously about giving NA another try. Does anyone know of any nationwide Christian grouos for this kind of stuff?

 

[justanobserver]

Thank you so much for the encouragement and advice! I am going to talk with him seriously about giving NA another try. Does anyone know of any nationwide Christian grouos for this kind of stuff?

I so understand where your at right now. I put my former wife thru similiar with my alcoholism/addictions before we divorced (she became a christian not long after that). I been sober now for 19 months and clean for over 2 yrs and all i will say is the person has got to want to do it or they wont change.

I am not a christian but a few years ago I attended a meeting in another part of the state called Celebrate Recovery - its a christian or scripture based version of AA and I remember enjoying my times going there. I felt welcome and no judgement. They have a web site that lists all the meetings (or most of the meetings) in each state. This is the only one that I am aware of.

I wish you the best in this. Dont forget, folks will get so involved in helping the addict they forget about themselves. I strongly (if you havent yet) recommend you do as another here suggested attend ALANON or similiar support group for those with alcoholic/addicted loved ones.

 

[AngelDove1]

Thank you so much for the encouragement and advice! I am going to talk with him seriously about giving NA another try. Does anyone know of any nationwide Christian grouos for this kind of stuff?

Your vary welcomed....
Ask your church,Or call AA,or NA they should be able to direct you to some good meetings.

Also if you look down at the bottem of the screen..
You will find support for Heroin addiction,and rehabs too.

 

[CurtinFL]

I am a recovering addict. I spent 9 months in a Christian Drug and rehab program in Okeechobee Florida. I attended Dunklin, the model for many programs worldwide. At Dunklin, you learn all about your addiction, but most importantly you come to have a working relationship with God. You must commit to 10months in the program, but you don't pay a thing until after you finish. They ask for as little as $5.00 a payment when you can afford it. Dunklin has been in operation for 43 years. Check them out on the web (.org) I don't know where you live so I can't recommend any places, but do check with your local churches, they should be able to help you find a suitable facility. There is HOPE. I met almost 200 addicts while I was there and God does heal us. If I can answer any more questions for you please do NOT hesistate to ask.

 

[BelovedWord]

I can't say if he is using again but I will say that in order to recover from hardcore drug abuse, a treatment plan must be in effect. I am a recovering alcoholic/drug addict. I could not have done it if it were'nt for AA/NA. It sounds to me like he is making excuses to not go to NA. My advice to you is to go to Alanon or NarcAnon. Also, I urge you to pray and ask God for guidance. He is here for you and your husband. I will continue to pray for you and your husband.

In His Service,
Brian

 

[littlenova]

this is for anyone that wants or needs to read about smack and the cold turkey possibility,it's going to be a nasty ride so go to a rehab center.

 

[drich0150]

Heroin/Crack addicts are the worst.. They lie about EVERYTHING..
If one tells you there not using they're using enough to keep the "shakes" away.
if they say they're using alittle, there habit is already in full swing..
if they say "I've been using off and on" then it's more like "I'm blowing 200 to 300 dollars a day..

And the worst part is, if they have been using a while. The only way to tell if there high, is if they are acting "normally." That's when you usually have your guard down, and your wanting more than anything to belive them when they tell you that they are clean...
I've dealt with my wifes addiction for 8 years.. she's been honestly clean for 2, but that first year of methadone and court appointed meetings and drug test were hell on earth. There was much tormenting, and gnashing of teeth.. It was worse than Watching her go thru withdrawls.. I guess because I was going thru them with her then as well.. I was being forced to understand I didnot know this person and that the person I married was died with the heroin use. And that I'd never see her again.. This new person was spiteful, resentful, too proud to except help for the church, made it nearly Impossible to go.. So had to find a "new" one. (One that I still don't like) kicking and fighting every waking moment. Until one day we actually had a Sunday afternoon of peace.. It was more like two strangers sharing a meal, but it was the first of many opportunities to reinvest in the relationship, and I've taken them. This year was still rough but it's getting better..

I say all of that not for praise or to give you a bleak pic of what may happen, but to give you the reason I couldn't give up on her..

The parable of the severant who owed his master much was the one "Jesus story" I I've been carring with me from a very early age.. I know you know the story so I'm not going to retell it, but to say this. I truly know my place. I know how wicked and vial I have been in my life and the very thought that he could forgive so much.. it's staggering. For me not to do the same would be a crime worthy of death.
Not to say your path needs to mirror mine it's just something to think about when you've hit the end of you rope for the last time...

Oh and "the bottom" for my wife was Od'ing in a barns and noble bathroom laying a stall where someone found her with a needle in her arm.. actually it was about 6months later when the sheriffs department served a warrant for that B&N thing. and "being" processed at 3 in the morning with the other junkies and "scarry" people and a year of probation... It worked better than 30,000 dollars of rehab and NA meetings for her anyway.. Oh, and if you do go down the local Sheriff's rehab program "county jail" then don't bail him out right away, let him sit and think for a few days.. It's a REAL eye opener for someone who doesn't mingle well with that "Element"... And I tell you this because He has to "hit bottom" and want to change. and untill then there is REALLY nothing you can physically do to get him there.

 

[vvincelli]

Agree. Not sure if he's using but be very very careful. Just keep an eye on the situation and see if other things start setting off alarm bells.

Very tough drug to step away from. Wish you (and him) the best.

- V

 

[AngelDove1]