Help...

[jesus'child]

Hi,

I don't know what to say, but my husband is not really attracted to me. Unfortunately, he is attracted to men. Not only that I wake up in the middle of the night and he is speaking on the phone. He doesn't want me anywhere near his computer or phone. We lost the friendship we had before marriage and now he tries to avoid me. I don't know what to do. I know its bad and wrong, but I am getting angry with God. I also do not know what is the right thing to do biblically. I am thinking of leaving him, but at the same time I love him, however this love is slowly going. What would Jesus tell me to do? I need Christian advice, what do I do, how do I act?

God bless

 

[UnitynLove]

Wow what a situation. I would try marriage counseling first and if that doesn't work then I would suggest that you leave him. The bible gives you ground to leave if a person is being unfaithful. You should not put up with this behavior, trust God he will work it out for your good.

 

[Johnnz]

If you have a sensible pastor or respected Christian to tlak to that could be helpful. You will need good support whatever happens.

John
NZ

 

[Johnnz]

If he is homosexual and not willing to make changes in his life then your marriage has essentially ended. Probably a talk with a Christian leader would be helpful.

John
NZ

 

[555onetwothreefour]

Hi,

I don't know what to say, but my husband is not really attracted to me. Unfortunately, he is attracted to men. Not only that I wake up in the middle of the night and he is speaking on the phone. He doesn't want me anywhere near his computer or phone. We lost the friendship we had before marriage and now he tries to avoid me. I don't know what to do. I know its bad and wrong, but I am getting angry with God. I also do not know what is the right thing to do biblically. I am thinking of leaving him, but at the same time I love him, however this love is slowly going. What would Jesus tell me to do? I need Christian advice, what do I do, how do I act?

God bless

I've heard it said, time and time again, is that communication is key to making any relationship work. You're his wife, and when you come together in marriage before God, then you share everything together. You become ONE. You have every right to know who he's been e-mailing and talking to. If you haven't already done so, i would flat out ask him why he has a problem with you knowing.

I'm thinking a couple of things. One... he's hiding from you because he doesn't want to deal with the outcome of something this dangerous. Which means, ultimately, that he's not wanting to lose what he currently has. Whether he's doing this for the thrill, or by wanting to hide the shame, he's still clinging to what he has.

Two... I don't want to encourage anyone to divorce. I think that all things can be salvaged, as long as both people are willing to work on it. The first thing that needs to happen is that he needs to be confronted. If he's doing shameful things like this then he needs to know that you're absolutely NOT okay with it. If he's reluctant to work on his behavior and try to iron all of this out, then perhaps he needs a taste of what he WILL lose if he doesn't shape up. Seperation, while it can send a message that it's "over" can also be a useful step in letting the two of you think about what this relationship really needs.

I would encourage you to seek God above all, then seek some biblical counsel from your pastor. Confront your husband. Until then, you have my prayers.