Help

[Jayangel81]

I always believed in God but never came to Christ until last year when I read an article about God's final judgment that was a call for me to get right with God.

I don't know if I will ever be able to get excited about praying I know I should I can get excited about going somewhere but not talking to God what kind of person that makes me selfish because we should get excited about prayer or even enjoying like I said it's a part of my life now but I can't get any kind of excitement about praying.

This is why he would send me to Hell because I wasn't excited to talk to him I'm having a panic attack now I love God with all my heart but can't get even excited I'm in tears now I don't know what to do

Yea but your feelings are so screwed up because of your OCD.. You know in your heart that you love God, thats all God needs to know Who said were going to Heaven based on how much we love Him??

Were going to Heaven because what Christ did for you. Im sorry your feeling this way right now, I know how it is I have felt it

Its actually weird how you mentioned this, I was sitting here watching this movie I enjoyed and I was thinking to myself "where is my motivation for praying" Why am I watching TV when I should be enjoying time with God"

Your not alone, these are all just feelings and emotions, and they decieve us. Theyre gonna try to make you feel that you dont love God, than spiritual warfare is going to tell you that your condemned because of it.

Dont worry about it, Just keep praying for strength. And know God loves you no matter how much you pray or talk with Him. Im not saying this just out of comfort it is the truth my friend

 

[JamesAH]

I was in a panic mode in so much tears I have never been scared in my entire life worrying that God will send me to Hell because of 1 thing and that is not having joy or love for praying even though he does it's selfish of me not to have those feelings that makes me evil.

 

[Jayangel81]

does it's selfish of me not to have those ~~~>feelings<~~~ that makes me evil.

Theres that ugly word again

Your feelings are decieved because of your illness. Why do you trust in your feelings, you know what OCD does to them. You cant base Gods love or grace even our salvation based on your feelings. There are so many things that will decieve them. Feelings can easily be twisted and turned around.

Your not evil, your a loving child of God whos feelings are scaring Him to death

James God knows everything. every bit of your heart, He knows you love Him. God doesnt condemn people for not praying enough. You will not see that at all. Nowhere in scriptures does it say that. We must rest on Gods Word Not our feelings.

Psalm 118:8 "It is better to trust in the Lord than to put confidence in man." ...or your feelings

James can we both agree that God sees the pain that you are in?

Ask yourself, why doesnt God just...take these bad feelings away and put good ones instead? It is because love, true love, it isnt about "feelings". Gods promise wasnt based upon a feelings. Jesus never died for our feelings. While it may be nice to have these feelings removed, God taught me that His promises to us, Gods Word stand reguardless of how we feel. Sick or not James.... Sick or not.

He wants you, to disreguard any feelings you have and to rest on Gods Word. God doesnt lie nor will He decieve you but there is something that is decieving you, something that does/tries to decieve us all. And that is our feelings. Rest on God and you are in good hands.

I know your full of fear and anxiety, its disgusting, its tormenting.. times when I asked God to just take me now, I couldnt bear it no more. Its because I didnt trust God James..But He taught me to do it. Noone ever said it was gonna be easy

But if you ground yourself in His Word and keep praying for that faith. you'll get it. I know you will persevere from this. And God is going to use you for something awesome. You just dont see it because of your pain.

 

[JamesAH]

I'm having another panic attack this time I'm not wanting to pray every minute or every hour because I don't want to making me not wanting to be with the Lord and I'm scared so scared

 

[kaykay9.0]

I'm having another panic attack this time I'm not wanting to pray every minute or every hour because I don't want to making me not wanting to be with the Lord and I'm scared so scared

James, I think you should consider getting some professional help here or at least talk to your pastor.

Your expectations of what the Christian life should be or what a Christian should feel is very unrealistic. Your expectations are way over the top, and I hope this doesn't sound unkind in any way. I just think you need to get with someone in real life who can counsel you and speak truth into your life. And if it turns out you do struggle with OCD, you may need to consider getting on medication for it. Often with OCD, we think we have a spiritual problem but really, it's the OCD distorting reality.

 

[Jayangel81]

I'm having another panic attack this time I'm not wanting to pray every minute or every hour because I don't want to making me not wanting to be with the Lord and I'm scared so scared

James God never said to pray every minute.

Why do you feel that you have to pray or be with the Lord a certain amount of time? There is nothing to be scared of. God is not giving you this fear

I agree with Kay you do need to seek professional help. There is only so much we can do for you on these forums im afraid And she is right your expectations of the Christian life is unrealistic and I think your being irrational because of your illness.

I prayed for you James and I will keep you in there.

 

[JamesAH]

James, I think you should consider getting some professional help here or at least talk to your pastor.

Your expectations of what the Christian life should be or what a Christian should feel is very unrealistic. Your expectations are way over the top, and I hope this doesn't sound unkind in any way. I just think you need to get with someone in real life who can counsel you and speak truth into your life. And if it turns out you do struggle with OCD, you may need to consider getting on medication for it. Often with OCD, we think we have a spiritual problem but really, it's the OCD distorting reality.

I'm going to the doctor soon I know I'm probably the worst OCD victim you guys have ever seen but this are the worst feelings I've ever had worrying constant about punishment from God if I do or feel(yes that ugly word feel)anything negative it's crippling me the worst feeling is that it's me and nothing else I can use the OCD as an excuse but deep down for some reason I get this feeling it's me feeling these things.

I do want to thank each and everyone of you though for the help you have been giving me I've been talking to my mother who is a devout Christian herself and the only person who has guided me on religious things and it's been helping somewhat but I will be going back to the doctor to see if I can get something stronger or an increase in dosage of what I'm on.

 

[Jayangel81]

I'm probably the worst OCD victim you guys have ever seen

I think we all have that in mind. You wouldnt believe the stuff I endured. You can get through this I know you can

 

[kaykay9.0]

I'm going to the doctor soon I know I'm probably the worst OCD victim you guys have ever seen but this are the worst feelings I've ever had worrying constant about punishment from God if I do or feel(yes that ugly word feel)anything negative it's crippling me the worst feeling is that it's me and nothing else I can use the OCD as an excuse but deep down for some reason I get this feeling it's me feeling these things.

I do want to thank each and everyone of you though for the help you have been giving me I've been talking to my mother who is a devout Christian herself and the only person who has guided me on religious things and it's been helping somewhat but I will be going back to the doctor to see if I can get something stronger or an increase in dosage of what I'm on.

Believe me, you've got a lot of OCD distortion going on here. There's always some grain of truth in whatever fears our OCD struggles manage to latch onto...but then they take truth and stretch it to the point it becomes error. Jesus always spoke of God as a Father. As a Christian, He is your Father, James. Try to trust and believe in the Father heart of God for you.

I don't know if you are in a church right now, but again, I think it might help if you could also get some help from a gentle, Godly pastor. I will pray that God leads you to such a person. I am glad that you are seeing a doctor, and I do hope you will tell him that you are struggling very badly and that yes, you may need a med change of some type.

 

[JamesAH]

I think we all have that in mind. You wouldnt believe the stuff I endured. You can get through this I know you can

Thanks Jay God bless you that's why I'm glad God has given you guys love I believe in communities like this so we can help each other out.

 

[GodsChild1010]

I read what you are going through.am sorri that u are goin thru all this.
(((((Hugs)))))

Im praying for you

You have alot of great advice hear

 

[firiel amdir]

*

 

[RachelZ]

Hey James...haven't read all of your thread but just wanted to say I am so sorry you are going through this! OCD is hideous...if nothing else can you try and hold onto the fact that if so many here can identify with how you're describing things then maybe there is more of a problem with OCD than any real likelihood of God damming you for not being good enough? If there was any chance that we could be good enough then there would have been no need for Jesus to die for us. Even when Jesus WANTED and specifically ASKED His disciples to pray in the garden of gethsemane and they instead fell asleep He didn't condemn them to hell and that was BEFORE he died for their sins! And as someone else has touched on, nowhere does it say we must pray or want to pray every single minute of every single day. But the bottom line is no matter what people say or what reasurance you get, if OCD is distorting your perspective then you are unlikely to come to a satsifactory resolution about this unless you try to treat the OCD. I know only too well that unless you deal with the root cause of this, then the problem will not readily improve. I know how hard it is to not listen to that oh so seductively disguised inner voice of apparent truth that says but what if this isn't OCD and this is really me...but only when we deal with it as if it's OCD can we ever begin to determine what the truth really is. One thing that helps me when I am finding it difficult to determine if something is really OCD or not is to say "that's OCD type thinking!" I can more easily recognise the anxiety of OCD than I can recognise the content as being OCD. By doing this I'm not saying something is or isn't all OCD as that can tend to send me in spiralling circles, but I can see that my reaction is OCD. So, If I treat the OCD then when my reactions are more rational I can more easily see if I have any remaining issues to deal with. I can honestly say that when I am doing better, the issues either don't arise or if they do they are much more manageable and not infused with hideous confusion and anxiety. It might be a good idea to check that out cos others with OCD may disagree with my way of tackling it.

I hope something of that helps and makes sense...please God may He bring you some peace today...in Jesus name amen. Take care, Rachel