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I am not just a regular sinner who still feels any guilt for what he's done. I am so careless if it comes to my consience and the sins I have committed to sear that consience that it's scary. I'm like a zombie
No it certainly was not .I'd like to find someone who's experienced something likewise and got to resolve the predicament they were in and then tell me how they did it so I can start living again instead of considering to end my life anytime soon, like everyday since July 2016.
[Edit] I am sorry, that was not directed to me.
What are you trying to achieve with this post ?
Trying to drive him away before you know his story .Where is the love ,the patience, required from a Christian ?
That's better .God is greater than your sins.
If you desire relationship with Him, He will work out your sin issue.
He's still working on mine ...
My parents are both non-practising Roman Catholics. I guess it was my task to inspire them and a lot of other people to start having faith in Jesus like I had in the beginning of last year. My change of behaviour got them thinking for sure, but now all that they're concerned about is how to get me out of this mess, and since they're not so well read in the Bible, they can't help me out on the spiritual path. They still clinge to the psychiatric approach...No it certainly was not .
I would like to know what denomination you grew up in ,even if they were not practising ?
Thank-you ...
Hello all,
I have already shared my story on this forum somewhere about a year ago. I'm still stuck in the same predicament and I've been wondering if I have committed the unpardonable sin. To summarize my story: I was depressed, as an atheist, around the later part of 2015. Then I prayed, because I was so desperate and my prayer was answered. I found God and I learned what the Holy Spirit was and what It did in my life. I had really never felt better than ever before, it felt as if I became a new human being. I started walking,talking, thinking and doing everything in a new way. I was so happy that I found God and wanted to become a better person after He'd shown me that I was a great sinner before.
Then I started backsliding, severely, and ignoring the revelations and guidance of the Holy Spirit. I didn't want to do certain things that God wanted me to do, because that meant giving up on sin. So I started to love sin again and was a great partaker in it. I kept doing this until my mind got, what I believe is called 'reprobated'. Emotionally flat, no interest in anything, mentally turned inwards and hella confused, concentration and sleeping problems. Summarized: I have nothing left to live for, I don't even love my closest family anymore.
Life is so hard right now and I can't take it much longer. All of this writing doesn't come from actual despair, I don't feel anything at all. I don't even seem to care about God and my past sins anymore, my conscience is seared and it doesn't stop.
I quit smoking weed and drinking alcohol 3 weeks ago , but it hasn't changed anything for me. Hebrews 6 4-6 isn't even bothering me anymore even though I know I fit the picture and I certainly can't be returned to a repentant state. I have rejected the gift of salvation and I'm therefor hellbound. I even saw a part of me slipping into a great red wall of fire when I was on a shrooms trip áfter I had lost the Holy Spirit or close to the end of losing It and I actually felt the heat for a brief moment. I took these shrooms because I wanted to get another revelation. I heard my parents cry that I was gone and then saw that part of me sinking in a pit of fire. I was ungrateful, only loved sin after I had been born again and I'm a terrible person.
Also, there is no actual hatred of self anymore, I don't have to 'forgive myself',because I don't even feel that there's something to forgive. As if I have forgotten about everything I've done in the past. My mind is a mess.
So my question is: Can I fix this situation or am I done here and should I just accept my fate?
Romans 9:17-24 speaks of this in a way.I don't know what I want. I certainly know that I had a relationship with God before and those months it lasted were the best months of my life. I'd lie if I said that I actually wánt a relationship with God, but I know that I nééd a relationship with God in order to be fixed. Also , I forgot to mention that I have been in psychiatry for over 18 months now and they haven't been able to fix me. Not even slightly. This mental confusion doesn't ever stop. I asked God to forgive me every day ever since, but those attempts were not genuine, if you know what I mean. Not from the bottom of my heart that is.
We all at some time experience a 'black hole' ,just like in space , which seems to swallow us up .You have to keep going having faith in the One who created you .There will be moments of 'light' briefly ,at first ,but then the darkness comes back .Hello all,
I have already shared my story on this forum somewhere about a year ago. I'm still stuck in the same predicament and I've been wondering if I have committed the unpardonable sin. To summarize my story: I was depressed, as an atheist, around the later part of 2015. Then I prayed, because I was so desperate and my prayer was answered. I found God and I learned what the Holy Spirit was and what It did in my life. I had really never felt better than ever before, it felt as if I became a new human being. I started walking,talking, thinking and doing everything in a new way. I was so happy that I found God and wanted to become a better person after He'd shown me that I was a great sinner before.
Then I started backsliding, severely, and ignoring the revelations and guidance of the Holy Spirit. I didn't want to do certain things that God wanted me to do, because that meant giving up on sin. So I started to love sin again and was a great partaker in it. I kept doing this until my mind got, what I believe is called 'reprobated'. Emotionally flat, no interest in anything, mentally turned inwards and hella confused, concentration and sleeping problems. Summarized: I have nothing left to live for, I don't even love my closest family anymore.
Life is so hard right now and I can't take it much longer. All of this writing doesn't come from actual despair, I don't feel anything at all. I don't even seem to care about God and my past sins anymore, my conscience is seared and it doesn't stop.
I quit smoking weed and drinking alcohol 3 weeks ago , but it hasn't changed anything for me. Hebrews 6 4-6 isn't even bothering me anymore even though I know I fit the picture and I certainly can't be returned to a repentant state. I have rejected the gift of salvation and I'm therefor hellbound. I even saw a part of me slipping into a great red wall of fire when I was on a shrooms trip áfter I had lost the Holy Spirit or close to the end of losing It and I actually felt the heat for a brief moment. I took these shrooms because I wanted to get another revelation. I heard my parents cry that I was gone and then saw that part of me sinking in a pit of fire. I was ungrateful, only loved sin after I had been born again and I'm a terrible person.
Also, there is no actual hatred of self anymore, I don't have to 'forgive myself',because I don't even feel that there's something to forgive. As if I have forgotten about everything I've done in the past. My mind is a mess.
So my question is: Can I fix this situation or am I done here and should I just accept my fate?
The fact that you are even on here pouring out your heart shows that you are not reprobate. Hebrews 6:4-6 is speaking about a mature believe, which I promise you have not yet reached that point (many don't). If you were truly reprobate you would not be here at all.
I'm glad to hear that you got out of your nasty situation. I say I'm glad but I'm not(not to be harsh, but if you experienced something likewise you will understand how my mind works right now). How long did it take for your heart to get unhardened and what were the things you've done to accomplish it?The fact that you are even on here pouring out your heart shows that you are not reprobate. Hebrews 6:4-6 is speaking about a mature believe, which I promise you have not yet reached that point (many don't). If you were truly reprobate you would not be here at all. Don't feel bad though, I was at a point where you were at in life, and basically, sin just hardened your heart as it did with mine. I grew cold towards my loved ones, and wanted nothing to do with God. I ran as far away as I could from him, but I eventually came back to him. I even at one point tried to sell my soul to the devil, and uttered the words, "I renounce my salvation." Yet, I'm here, back in love with God again, and things are going great. My life God turned around, and now I'm going into the ministry. I going to teach others the very thing I tried to run from. Don't worry, God has already chosen to forgive you for everything you done. There is nothing you can do to ever stop God from loving you, and stop him from wanting to have a relationship with you again. It will take some time to in-harden you heart, but as you spend time in the word, and fellowship with God, your heart will become opened towards the things of God again. Your flesh is going to fight you to no end, but keep pushing forward, and lean on God for strength, and I promise you can overcome this. There still hope for you
P.S, I did not read any of the other comment. So some stuff may have already been said.
I was facing an all or nothing situation. Either become the man God wanted me to become or become nothing, and I'm certainly nothing now.
God did indeed bring Jonah forth from the belly of the whale. But doesn't running away from your calling and therefore rejecting what the Holy Spirit 'tells you to do' mean you are in danger of committing the unpardonable sin. So did Jonah not commit the unpardonable sin for running away from his calling?I imagine Jonah felt much the same, when he ran from his calling and found himself in the belly of a whale.
But.
God *did* bring Jonah forth from the belly of that whale. And he did complete his calling.
An' that's why we remember him.
So did Jonah not commit the unpardonable sin for running away from his calling?
Hello all,
I have already shared my story on this forum somewhere about a year ago. I'm still stuck in the same predicament and I've been wondering if I have committed the unpardonable sin. To summarize my story: I was depressed, as an atheist, around the later part of 2015. Then I prayed, because I was so desperate and my prayer was answered. I found God and I learned what the Holy Spirit was and what It did in my life. I had really never felt better than ever before, it felt as if I became a new human being. I started walking,talking, thinking and doing everything in a new way. I was so happy that I found God and wanted to become a better person after He'd shown me that I was a great sinner before.
Then I started backsliding, severely, and ignoring the revelations and guidance of the Holy Spirit. I didn't want to do certain things that God wanted me to do, because that meant giving up on sin. So I started to love sin again and was a great partaker in it. I kept doing this until my mind got, what I believe is called 'reprobated'. Emotionally flat, no interest in anything, mentally turned inwards and hella confused, concentration and sleeping problems. Summarized: I have nothing left to live for, I don't even love my closest family anymore.
Life is so hard right now and I can't take it much longer. All of this writing doesn't come from actual despair, I don't feel anything at all. I don't even seem to care about God and my past sins anymore, my conscience is seared and it doesn't stop.
I quit smoking weed and drinking alcohol 3 weeks ago , but it hasn't changed anything for me. Hebrews 6 4-6 isn't even bothering me anymore even though I know I fit the picture and I certainly can't be returned to a repentant state. I have rejected the gift of salvation and I'm therefor hellbound. I even saw a part of me slipping into a great red wall of fire when I was on a shrooms trip áfter I had lost the Holy Spirit or close to the end of losing It and I actually felt the heat for a brief moment. I took these shrooms because I wanted to get another revelation. I heard my parents cry that I was gone and then saw that part of me sinking in a pit of fire. I was ungrateful, only loved sin after I had been born again and I'm a terrible person.
Also, there is no actual hatred of self anymore, I don't have to 'forgive myself',because I don't even feel that there's something to forgive. As if I have forgotten about everything I've done in the past. My mind is a mess.
So my question is: Can I fix this situation or am I done here and should I just accept my fate?
.So my question is: Can I fix this situation or am I done here and should I just accept my fate?
I'm glad to hear that you got out of your nasty situation. I say I'm glad but I'm not(not to be harsh, but if you experienced something likewise you will understand how my mind works right now). How long did it take for your heart to get unhardened and what were the things you've done to accomplish it?
I'd say a clicinal depression is ecstacy compared to what I'm experiencing now, and I know how it is to be depressed to death since that was what God rescued me from in the first place. I just want things to be alright. And even saying that ' I want' something doesn't come from an actual desire, if you know what I mean. If people'd ask me what I want I'd say I want a girlfriend and live life to the fullest but that doesn't really come from me. This might sound weird
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