corvus_corax
Naclist Hierophant and Prophet
Quite a bit off topic from the OP, but I was thinking the same thing.You're doing it wrong.
"Fuzzy" and "pink"......pshaw
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Quite a bit off topic from the OP, but I was thinking the same thing.You're doing it wrong.
Yes, evaluating someone for marriage is the sole purpose for Christian dating.
In fact, Christian teens and other teens have the same purpose for dating: to get laid. Christian teens just have a more mature and long-thinking perspective on 1.) when that should happen (in marriage), and 2.) the other things that go along with it.
Respect for and submission to her mate, modest behavior, clothing herself in good deeds.
"Chivalry," BTW, is not a Biblical word; but a man who practices his Biblical role of leader and self-sacrificing caretaker in a relationship will generally meet what we would call "chivalrous" behavior.
That attitude--as well as the attitude that love and kindness are "earned"--is the root of most marital dissolutions. High on the list of things a young woman should look for in a man is someone she can respect unconditionally; and if she cannot do so, she should not marry him.
Because teaching her that boys should be waiting on her hand and foot, woo-ing her away, giving her all their attention, and basically to expect to be treated like a princess -- is not going to end well. Let the poor girl figure out boys herself, because telling her these ideal fantasies is just going to, well, disappoint her when she gets a dose of the real world.
I tell my 9yo daughter that she should be treated as I treat her and her mom.Does anyone know of a biblically based book on male behavior? Specifically for those of dating age. I actually want it for my 9-year-old daughter. No, she is not dating, but I want her to be ready and know how she should be treated when we get to that stage.
I am so surprised that I haven't yet read but one post that was somewhat helpfull. You all have some strange ideas of what relationships/marriages are or should be
First of all, I understand that the term, 'chivalry' may not be the perfect definition of what I want her to look for, but when you read it, you understood exactly what I meant. Second, I know that I am the best example; which is a pretty daunting concept, especially to someone who has a pretty good concept of what the bibleperson has to saythat sbout the subject, but I try to do my best. 3rd, I am not trying to dictate the person I expect, but the person that God expects. Hints the description 'biblically based'. I thank you all though. This is my first attempt at a forum discussion and I have been thoroughly underwhelmed.
I am deffinately the kind of father that will not let her find out guys on her own. That is 'a baby having a baby' waiting to happen.
I guess what I'm not clear on is why you think a boyfriend should treat her in such a radically different way than anybody else that such treatment can't be shown by example and must bet read about in a book
A child will learn best how she deserves to be treated by how her parents treat her. when she has a problem, do you listen to her, and sincerely attempt to understand it? When she is happy, do you share in her joy? Do you make time for her, and treat it as *important* time? Do you let her make mistakes and learn from them and give her the freedom to develop her own interests and pursue her own goals and otherwise let her experience the world through *her* own life?
well then, she will probably expect other people to treat her with the respect she deserves as a human being. and if you have taught her how to treat other people similarly, she will be able to reciprocate and treat her partner with respect also.
when she has a problem, do you immediately take it away from her? Do you do her school assignments for her? If she is upset, do you simply tell her wat to do, or do it for her? Do you ever hit her--in *any* way? do you ever laugh when she cries? When she has trouble accomplishing a goal, do you treat her as if she has failed (as opposes to running into obstacles)? Well.then, she probably views herself as incompetent, unable to function as her own person, not worthy of respect and dependant on others, and she will probably be most comfortable with people who treat her that way.
people gravitate toward familiar situations. if you want her to gravitate toward people who will respect her, you need to make respect familiar and comfortable for her.
People, I am not, and would not try to use a book to replace me. But, as all parents are aware; good, wise, practical help is always welcome. I'm just looking for an additional resource. I never could have imagined that it would be such a hard concept
People, I am not, and would not try to use a book to replace me. But, as all parents are aware; good, wise, practical help is always welcome. I'm just looking for an additional resource. I never could have imagined that it would be such a hard concept
Or make sure she knows that tv romance isn't grounded in reality.
You're asking for a book that in all probability would harm your daughter. That's why people are reluctant to be forthcoming. Instead of stubbornly ignoring the advice people are giving, I recommend you take on board the fact that everyone here is advising you not to set your daughter up for failure.Do anyyou of youyou read theit actual posts? It doesnt't seem like it. Again, I'm not wanting the book to teach for me. I can, will, and am proud that God has found me worthy of such a task. I was just wondering if there were any other SUPPLEMENTAL sources of biblical wisdom that might prove helpful. It is not wise to not seek out all possible sources of golden nuggets that are available. I guess that I should assume that everyone that has ever done anything did that thing strictly on their own and never sought out help from additional avenues. I dare say that would be quite an assumption. It is not really a hard concept. Don't worry though, I will never seek out help again.