For those that waited until marriage to do the you know what

[marineimaging]

Many people including theologians, disagree on that point.

If you take time to browse this forum you will find that only about 2% of all the OP's and responders agree on anything. I contend that the road lesser traveled is a more secure road for the soul. Otherwise Jesus would have said that a few will call my name but I will respond to the many. If SEXual relations before marriage were valuable to the long term relationship then it would be a major subject in scripture. Is it? No. Nor is it considered the spiritual or even physiological glue to a relationship in scripture. As for many people who think that premaritial sex is important to the length of time a couple is betrothed (before getting married), being many doesn't make them right. I just makes them a mob.

 

[marineimaging]

this is an old thread from last year that got going again
wonder if the OP is even reading it anymore

since we waited til marriage, I certainly had the expectation built up in my mind
but don't think us getting married 6 mos from first date had anything to do with sex
he asked me to marry, I said yes, we started planning wedding right away

for me sex has become more important the longer we are married
even though, in my head, know he loves me, want him to show me physically

And I agree with you 100 percent. I will also say that our waiting and doing it by the book had nothing to do with how long we dated or were engaged. What it had to do with in an awesome way is knowing that we could wake up each day with the blessing that we did not have to worry about birth control, about a sudden pregnancy, or about wondering if our relationship was based on lust or love. That was all behind us.

 

[iknowHes4real]

The act of sex is consummating a marriage in God's eyes. This act of "marriage" within this age is just for legal purposes. The idea of "sex before marriage" really makes no sense if we view it in God's way.

If we marry according to God's will for our lives (i.e. marrying someone God has picked for us and not based on our own carnal ways), we don't need to worry about timing, issues, wrong intentions, etc. Of course, that's not to say that marriage will be easy. As long as we keep God at the center of our marriages and continue to esteem our partners above ourselves, all will be well.

In Christ,
GT

 

[Sparagmos]

It's still The Atlantic, or actually a story writer who The Atlantic published, quoting what they think they understood from somewhere else. So no, it's The Atlantic, or actually just Lauren Fox, trying to make cohabitors feel good. Reality might differ.

It’s a STUDY. If you think it’s flawed, then challenge the study on its merits. Instead it sounds like you are saying you think your own personal subjective anecdotal observations are more scientific than a study. That’s not very rational.

 

[chevyontheriver]

It’s a STUDY. If you think it’s flawed, then challenge the study on its merits. Instead it sounds like you are saying you think your own personal subjective anecdotal observations are more scientific than a study. That’s not very rational.

Thank you for digging up something from a year and a half ago to use to tell me I'm irrational.

 

[Sparagmos]

Thank you for digging up something from a year and a half ago to use to tell me I'm irrational.

You think I went looking for an old post of yours for the purpose of telling you you’re irrational? I didn’t even know you existed before I read your post. Pretty irrational.

 

[chevyontheriver]

Thank you again.

 

[marineimaging]

I have a very tiny sample size that I'm judging this on but it seems to me that Christians who wait for marriage before sex are more likely to marry their eventual partner quicker than a couple whos already doing it. Does this sound about right? And if it is true then doesn't this lead to all kinds of issues and wrong intentions for marriage? I think waiting for marriage is a good thing but if you marry someone after a month or year just so you can do the deed then it seems counterproductive to the point of marriage. Perhaps people have experiences themselves or of others who waited a very long time but it doesn't seem likely from what I've seen around me.

One thing that is failed in ALL of these studies is taking into account the effects of modern society on the relationship before and after sex and before and after marriage. If you look at ALL of the aspects of a Bible based husband and wife relationship vs ALL of the impacts made by society on a non-Biblical relationship, the whole of society in industrialized nations is more acceptable of a non-Biblical couple than those who did it "by the book". I mean, if a Godly relationship were as equally endorsed by society as a non-Godly relationship then I contend that marriage itself would be more successful. Anyone with half a brain can see that having to endure the pressures faced by teens and young adults of today leads many into sex before marriage except for those who resist, then it becomes a case of marriage because of sex long before the relationship has had a chance to mature toward compatibility.