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Sam91

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@Doctor.Sphinx 'I don't think you'd want the anti-serum anyway... listen to this..

'The principle of antivenom is based on that of vaccines, developed by Edward Jenner; however, instead of inducing immunity in the patient directly, it is induced in a host animal and the hyperimmunized serum is transfusedinto the patient...'

'it sounds very circumspect don't you think?'
 
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Sam91

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'Hmm @Doctor.Sphinx speaking of venom. If you look carefully... just there... you will see a very neat and tidy line of tiny sutures. I had removed the glands that produce the neurotoxic venom.'

The good, poor old Doctor Sphinx exhaled and visibly relaxed.

Sam 91 continued. 'Maybe, I should have told you originally but it was useful data to add to my studies of psychological reactions to imminent and unexpected death.

It appears a verbose sphinx goes silent when confronted with a painful and unfortunate demise.

Thank you very much for your input into this research. I expect to publish my findings at the end of the study in 2020.'

The good doctor S just gaped, dumbstruck as she left the cabin to join their friends in the sun. He didn't seem to have any symptoms related to the bite. He missed the others, he didn't know what to think. In 3000 years he hadn't met someone like this. 'LaSorcia...'
 
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Doctor.Sphinx

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The doctor asked with a concerned look on his face as he examined the masterfully straight line of sutures on the reptile. 'Did Sam91 really just say she had rendered Hillary Clinton totally harmless?'

LaSorcia looked up, wishing she had exited to the friends outside with @Sam91, when the opportunity presented. 'Well, not totally harmless. She's still pretty scary to look at. And I suppose, just because she's not poisonous anymore, doesn't mean she can't infect one with any number of diseases that such horrible creatures carry. I mean, just look at what she did to Bill...'

Doctor Sphinx didn't know what to think. @LaSorcia was often quiet, and didn't come across as a herpetologist, but what she said did make some sense. He sighed, as Hillary Clinton slithered back amongst Sam91's impressive collection of yarmulkes. 'I'd better not let that snake wipe it's slime on Sam's yarmulke of toxicological assistance, or her yarmulke of protection-against-mental-eavesdroppers, or even her yarmulke of unicorn-surgery-for-dummies, for that matter', he thought to himself.

'Uhhhh. Do you want us to go outside while you sort out those yarmulkes and find the snake, Doc?', asked @DavidFirth, eager to escape the boredom and possibly down some extra chow.
 
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mama2one

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Christine was scratching her head wondering how their food seemed to keep disappearing when she caught a glimpse of @DavidFirth heading over.

She ducked behind a barrel and spied through the worn wooden cracks. Hmmmm, so that's where some of the food is going!

She jumped up causing food to slip through his fingers and a mouse promptly grabbed a piece of cheese.

"What's going on?" she asked the startled CF member.

"Just a little bored with @Doctor.Sphinx 's and @Sam91 's shenanigans."
Where did everyone else go?"

Christine shrugged, "don't know but was about to get a piece of cheese myself. I love cheese."
Suddenly, David's eyes lit up and they began a lengthy discussion of their favorite cheeses.

Their discussion was interrupted 20 min later by strange sounds and animated voices."
"Could we be arriving?" Christine asked David.
"Arriving where?" he asked.

@GreenWizard popped in, heard the question, and started laughing hysterically.

"Do any of us know where we're going anymore?"
 
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Doctor.Sphinx

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'Does it even matter, considering we have all this cheese?' interrupted Doctor Sphinx cheerily, gate-crashing the conversation for the upteenth time.

@christine40 rolled her eyes, and @DavidFirth nodded his head at her understandingly.

'Now if only @Sam91 were here, wearing her yarmulke of extra-ordinary Old Testament knowledge, we could have a bible study' the doctor went on, oblivious to the annoyance his presence was causing.

'We don't need Sam91 to study the bible, Doctor Sphinx', commented Christine40 tersely.

'Well, *you* certainly can't wear the yarmulke of extra-ordinary Old Testament knowledge,' the doctor laughed. 'It would be too large for you'.
'No offense intended about the shape of your head', he added quickly.

'And besides, why does it have to be the Old Testament?', Christine40 continued. 'Aren't the most important lessons contained within the New? We don't need to study the bible *all* the time'.

The doctor nodded his agreeance. 'I was just looking for some good, old fashioned action,' he replied. 'Nothing too bloodthirsty - just some battles, glorious victory. Not too many of the good guys dying, you understand?'

'Did you forget that only moments ago, Sam91 was conducting experiments on you?' asked DavidFirth incredulously.

The doctor nodded sheepishly, but then went on. 'But it's the way they were conducted - so expertly, so scientifically. Who could fault such a mind?'

The three friends' minds quickly turned back to cheese, as what at first appeared to be a humble rodent, but on closer examination, turned out to be @GreenWizard, stole another block.
 
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DavidFirth

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I sure envy @gennypearl for living in this island paradise, David said. The only problem I have with this place is that people don't charcoal grill out nearly enough. One needs more than just an umbrella drink, sand and sun to properly enjoy all this beautiful scenery, after all.

So... where to next, Doc?
 
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Sam91

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@joyshirley came over to the group, beckoning to the rest to join them. 'I've made you all something.' She sat down and reached into the bag.

Her hand brought out some wide brim hats for the ladies and desert hats with neck protectors for the guys.

'Wow' proclaimed @*LILAC
'JoyShirley where did you have the time to craft these?' Said @christine40
'These are so stylish and so needed in this weather' @LaSorcia exclaimed
'Thank you so much' added @DavidFirth. @Spikey and @GreenWizard nodding in agreement.
'Yes, thank you. It was so kind of you to make those' said @gennypearl

'I made them while @ancientofdays was overboard and while you all were sleeping, the last thing we need is sunstroke... after all we never know what trouble we'll get into next' replied @joyshirley smiling.

Sam 91 smiled. Joyshirley had made hers slightly larger. It fit her largish head wonderful and that was including her yarmulke. 'Hmmm Dr S is strangely quiet.' She looked over and he'd fallen asleep. 'Aww all the excitement has tired him out'.

'Land Ahoy.... China...' squawked @ebony

@DavidFirth licked his lips!
 
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Dirk1540

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Just then the celebration of spotting land was frightfully interupted by the presence of 5 more highly venomous King Clinton snakes!

In total disarray every part of the group scattered and ran in a different direction. Handling one Hillary Clinton was bad enough but this could end up in total disaster! In desperation @Sam91 fumbled through Wikipedia once more, having no clue what she would hope to accomplish by doing so.

As if the words had jumped off of the page Sam had to look twice because she could not believe what she had just read. A list of creatures with high resistance to King Clinton venom...”Mongoose, honey badger...” “There’s no way I could be reading the 3rd entry correctly” Sam thought!!! After rubbing her eyes and looking back sure enough it read...
@DavidFirth

Immediately after reading this Sam gazed up only to see with amazement that David was snacking on all 5 King Hillary snakes as if they were beef jerky. Sam barely squeaked a few incomplete questions out “But how can you...” “But how is it possible that...” only to have her quiet fragmented questions interrupted by David’s loud enthusiastic question, “Does anyone have any Tabasco sauce!!??”

As David looked up to find more napkins he noticed everyone’s bewildered stares completely locked onto him. He very calmly explained to the group that the reason he has very high resistance levels to Hillary Clinton venom is that...
 
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Sam91

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@Dirk1540 and @DavidFirth had been taking the venom as a recreational drug, which accounts for the latter's current food obsession and odd comments. Their immune system had built up a tolerance for the highly toxic venom. However, poor, poor Dirk has been the heavier user and is hidden deep in the bowels of the ship, due to him acting very much like a mythical zombie. Hence, the abundance of snakes, they have been breeding them to ensure a continuing supply of the potent substance.

The members were shocked, aghast and deeply sorrowed at this news. Tears in the eyes of a few of the ladies, maybe one in the eye of Twinkle-toes. You can never tell with him.

@GreenWizard looked mightily curious, causing @gennypearl to give him yet another eye-roll
 
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Sam91

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The group huddled together and prayed for wisdom. They had no data as to what symptoms were to be expected by cutting out the deadly poison cold turkey. They felt it must be the best way. Thankfully the ship had docked and they clubbed together their currency. First they did was to check @DavidFirth and poor, poor @Dirk1540 into a hospital.

Unfortunately, the medics hadn't dealt with such a business before but would keep David and Dirk under observation. It was with many tears that the group left to go to the ship. The mood on the ship was very solemn. Even @GreenWizard didn't have the heart to make mirth.

Three days later David and Dirk joined the others. It was so much of an ordeal that the group didn't hear the details. However, David intimated that he'd had intense agony in every bone... infact even the cartilage of his nose felt like it was being squeezed. They had learned their lesson and would never abuse their bodies, given to them by the Lord, again.

Things looked like they were going to continue to be peaceful but...
 
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Doctor.Sphinx

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Then Doctor Sphinx burst in.

'What have you done with Hillary Rodham Clinton?' he shouted at @Dirk1540.

'Settle down', commented @Sam91, 'The experiment is over Doctor Sphinx. The results have been recorded. You passed...'

'Your snake's middle name is Rodham?' sniggered @DavidFirth.

'It's a very common name amongst snakes...' replied Doctor Sphinx defensively. 'And besides, she's named after that corrupt and annoying American lawyer of the same name. The one married to that smarmy ex-president.'

'Michelle Obama?' questioned the @GreenWizard, confused.

'No, no, no!' exclaimed Doctor Sphinx exasperatedly. 'The other smarmy one'.

'You don't mean Barbara Bush, do you', asked DavidFirth helpfully. 'Her husband was kind of smarmy'.

'If I meant dumb as an anvil's weight in barbells, I'd have said so', replied Doctor Sphinx frustratedly. 'I said smarmy because I meant slimier than the ophiophagus hannah's aquatic cousin'.

'Ah, you really do mean Michelle Obama,' answered Dirk1540 with certainty.

'Look,' said Doctor Sphinx, tired already of the guessing game he'd initiated, 'Hillary Clinton is getting more involved in the 2018 midterms, and she's been invited to a TV interview tomorrow night. As her manager, controller, puppeteer - call it what you will - I need to get hold of that obnoxious, ugly, good-for-nothing reptile!'

DavidFirth gave Dirk1540 a guilty look, but Sam91 looked on brightly, ready with her pen and notebook, interested to see how this turn of events would play out, and how a Sphinx would respond to the bad news someone was about to deliver...
 
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Doctor.Sphinx

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'Johnson?' Doctor Sphinx exclaimed. 'Johnson? I apologise old chap, but I've never heard of him. Johnson doesn't sound like the name of a snake, or even a poisonous reptile. Are you sure he's a politician?'

'Doctor Sphinx, if you don't give me a destination, our ship is going to keep heading straight, and we're going to end up in Antarctica' @DavidFirth exclaimed, trying to get some sense out of the ageing and at-least-partially-insane doctor.

'Antarctica, eh?' asked Doctor Sphinx, thoughtfully stroking his beard. 'Then we'd be able to locate the ice wall, and possibly the beginnings of the firmament which covers the Earth, and prove once and for all the Earth is flat.'

'Or prove it's not flat', added @Sam91, 'I mean, if we weren't able to locate the ice wall, or the firmament'.

'If we can't locate the firmament, it just means we're looking in the wrong spot', snapped Doctor Sphinx. 'It's clearly all there in Genesis 1 and 2'.

'Perhaps we should go back to the Philippines?' asked @GreenWizard hopefully. 'Doctor Sphinx could teach the native police force how to be less corrupt, @LaSorcia could start a hospital or something, Sam91 could teach them the secret of modesty and proper clothing...'

'Why GreenWizard, that's the most altruistic thought I've ever heard from a leprechaun,' Doctor Sphinx exclaimed at the somewhat repugnant smelling, but never-the-less philanthropic, little, green man. 'Very well', he beamed, 'Captain Firth, take us back to the Philippines!'

'Errr... Isn't that illegal, seeing as we only just got turned away by the police?' asked Sam91.

'Nonsense, dear Sam91', explained the doctor magnanimously. 'The laws of the Philippines only apply when we're in the Philippines, or if we're Filipinos... or ah... Filipinas,' he added, glancing at @gennypearl, 'and as we're not in the Philippines, and clearly we're Americans, they don't apply to us'.

'I thought you were Egyptian', questioned the GreenWizard, his eyes narrowed with suspicion. '3000 plus years advising the Pharaohs and all...'

'No silly, he's Jewish, that's why he always wears those funny yarmulkes', explained @LaSorcia.

'But I thought he was British, with the superfluous letters he uses in his spelling', added @Dirk1540.

'I'm sorry GreenWizard', explained the doctor kindly to the green leprechaun, 'But as it seems none of us can agree, we will have to continue our journey to visit Queen Elizabeth II. Yes, she won't be as restful on the eyes as the scenery in the Philipines, but perhaps this will save Sam91 some work.'

'Full steam ahead, Captain Firth!' he added, as he donned his yarmulke of intrepid-intercontinental-explorership.
 
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Sam91

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@Sam91 decided that she would need to ponder carefully the origins of the Sphinx. o_O

She realised by the position of the sun that the ship was, infact, sailing south. Had Dr Sphinx sabotaged the ship into looking for Antartica, or was something else afoot? She also pondered physics and geometry... "Surely, our latitude is in the northern hemisphere; but in the south, does the sun still rise in the East? Also, if the astute @Doctor.Sphinx is correct and the Earth IS indeed flat, would that mean the sun orbits us? If the Earth is flat would the Sun come up from the same direction to everyone? Would there be a different perception of East?

If there was a difference in perception would that debunk evolution? If there was a difference, would one expect more left handed people statistically to have evolved in the southern hemisphere. A left hander like myself would have heard of that! Therefore the distribution is similar globally.

However, the sun must rise the same in both hemisphere because we are not facing the equator and it isn't a matter of left and right.. The difference between other people's left and right doesn't change to themselves just at someone looking at it. Where as the sun's patterns and compass points are fixed.

Mentally sings 'Sun moon and stars in their courses above, all i have needed His hand hath provided, Great is His faithfulness, Lord unto me!'

It became obvious that the good doctor had sabotaged (so her suspicion was correct in at least one incident... instinct.. not paranoia) @Sam91 tinfoil yarmulke-of-protection-against-mental-eavesdroppers when Dr Sphinx struggled to squash the urge to confront and explain the many mistakes. He had jammed his fingers into his ears in a vain and futile attempt to still the madness of her foolish fallacies and suppositions and the monstrosity of her mental singing.

She also realised from @LaSorcia's reaction that she also was reading minds. LaSorcia was looking at Samantha concerned, and wondering whether her rambling mind was the beginning of insanity, too much travel, lack of sleep or 4g.

She looked at the innocent crew members going about their business when she smelled smoke, plastic burning...
.
 
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