Tears said:
I don't like being me.
Sometimes I get mad at God because he made me this way and he let this stuff happen to me.
How can I stop hating myself?
You know if we liked ourselves, we would probably never have known that we needed a Saviour?
It is hard for us to understand why things happen to us, but over the years I have found that God did not cause the bad things.
I was a child of abusive parents, when I was growing up I use to pray that I would die, the heartache and pain was so bad. As I got older, I began to learn more about my Heavenly Father's nature.
We forget that people have freedom of choice, my parents had the choice of loving me or abusing me. God allowed them choice that is the only thing he allowed.
Out of that choice, he allowed me to come to him, many people live life's of desperation never knowing God, and go out into eternity lost. He made even those bad things that happened in my childhood work for my good.
I have learned to trust and adore him as my loving Father, and I as his little child.
He even allowed me to reach my parents before they died, so that they could receive forgiveness for their sins. He is truly a merciful good God.
Remember, you have become a new creation, created in Christ Jesus old things have passed away and all things have become new. I know that it is hard to see good in our pain at times, but he is good, we can trust him for that.
In the meantime my prayers go out to you.
A loving sister in Christ
Crystal