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Ok, for starters, I'm American, a French American. So, I found myself in Australia, in Perth to be specific, at a fine breakfast buffet at a pretty fancy hotel. I had come to Perth on a US Navy ship, but I was on shore leave, sampling the local...goods...and I came down to have breakfast.
There were all of the usual things there, and there was this thing called "Vegemite". Now, I had heard OF it, but never had it. It was right next to the bread, so it looked like I should spread it on bread.
So, I took a piece of white bread, and the jar of Vegemite, and I proceeded to slather it on thick, like a great big schmear of peanut butter or cream cheese. I went back to the jar and got more. By the time I was done, I had four tablespoons of Vegemite piled up on that piece of bread, like a pile of peanut butter - as much weight in Vegemite as bread, maybe more.
The stuff looked rich and interesting, a very dark brown. I remember my delight at tasting Nutella for the first time. And Cream Cheese. Such delightful things that we smear on bread: Peanut Butter, Nutella, Cream Cheese...and now, a quarter of a cup of Vegemite lathered onto a piece of bread a half-inch thick. Surely this would be paradaisical.
So, I opened my watering mouth to admit this paradaisical delight, and bit down.
And I vomited.
Back home, when the Alewives first came into the Great Lakes as eggs in the ballast tanks of seagoing ships, they spawned without natural predators, and grew into such huge fish balls that vast quantities of them died of natural causes and washed up on the beach, where they were piled by bulldozers into great smelly heaps of rotting fish. If you stepped on one, it sort of mushed down like a brown squashed banana, and produced a very specific stench.
That stench of rotten alewife, and that squishy consistency - THAT is what filled up my senses as my mouth filled with a tablespoon full of pure Vegemite. OH MY GOD.
It was enough to gag a maggot, and it DID cause me to hurl, to projectile vomit, right there on the floor right in front of the buffet line in one of Perth's finest hotels.
And then the taste stuck with me, like [bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse] on a shoe.
SO VERY NASTY.
I knew instinctively how they make it. There's a factory assembly line conveyor belt that comes up out of a fiery volcano in the Outback called Mt. Doom, whose glowing caldera is a tunnel leading straight down to the sixth circle of Hell. There, twisted, evil demons that have feasted on zombie flesh squat over the jars to defecate. Then the jars are capped, sealed and shipped right out of Mt. Doom to Australian nurseries and convenience stores. Truly infernal stuff. The jars should be marked "Hell Droppings"
Many years later, I was at another buffet, in London, with an English chap. They had Marmite there. It looked just like Vegemite. It, too, was in a little jar. An English chap, colleague of mine, saw me pull out my cruficix, garlic and holy water and start performing the exorcism in the vile substance's general direction and he assured me that, no, no, this was positively DELIGHTFUL stuff.
I recall thinking "Well, you ARE English..." confirming what everybody in France already knows: the English eat out of garbage cans.
But he ASSURED me, and he even prepared a "tartine" of Marmite to prove it. He suggested that there was something deficient about my manhood if I would not even take a bite (and it is very GALLING for a Frenchman to have his manhood questioned by an Englishman, because we ALL know they're poofs). So I had to try it.
Now, I noticed that there was quite a bit different about this Marmite Tartine in London than my Vegemite pile in Perth. For one thing, the Brit had TOASTED the bread. I guess if you're going to smear rotten fish on bread, it's slightly less revolting if you remove the nauseating sponginess from it.
Second, he had spread a pretty thick bed of butter on the toast, and the butter was from Normandie (ah, Europe), so here were two good things: toast and French butter. And then I noticed that the Marmite was VERY thinly spread. It was about a molecule thick, perhaps a half of teaspoon on the whole piece of toast (contrasted with the 12 full teaspoons - 4 tablespoons - a quarter of a cup of Vegemite I had slathered on the raw bread down in Perth).
Gingerly, and Ah! Slowly!, I brought the [bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse] Slime on Toast up to my face. I did not sniff it. I knew if I felt that heady scent of demon anus like a stinky fist right in my center of conscience, I'd never even get one bite down, and then this English Poof would have beaten the Frenchman. Unacceptable.
So I bit down, and...it wasn't so bad. It was salty. I tasted the toast, I tasted the butter. The Marmite just added this saltiness to it, a yeasty saltiness.
I told him about the Vegemite and he almost blew his coffee out his nose laughing. "Mate, you can't eat Marmite out of a jar like Peanut spread. Who would ever DO such a thing. Ha ha ha."
So, my final judgment is that if Vegemite is anything like Marmite, it is the Australian equivalent of Fugu, that poisonous fish that will absolutely kill you unless it's prepared by an expert Japanese sushi chef. Non-natives should only attempt to eat a Vegemite sandwich that has been prepared by a native Aussie or Brit.
It's actually pretty good in single-molecule doses. Eaten like peanut butter, it could be a very cruel execution method.
Oh my gosh. Nothing funnier than a Youtube video of an American or others trying Vegemite all wrong.
First if you have a jar of something new it helps to read it first.
Second zero fish, Vegemite is vegatarian.
Third, its basically spreadable Soysauce so you poured yourself a cup of Soy sauce and drank a shot.
Toast, butter and just a little Vegemite- unless you are a seasoned Aussie then you can eat it any way you please.
I'd never recommend someone be so open minded they will believe anything, but if you can be for the time you watch the following, you might find it interesting. Some don't like Murray, and some love him, and though I certainly don't agree with all he teaches, some of it makes very good sense...you decide for yourselves.
The thinking people I know simply shrug their shoulders and say there is nothing new to see here.
As do I, friend. I'm just having fun helping to turn this thread into chaos, since the OP is either pure satire or so downright bonkers there's really not much else one can do with it.Love the quotes in your signature, by the way, especially the Third Law of Theology.
I’ll argue with a science denier in a hot minute . I don’t see how bible based ignorance and superstition make anything better and it causes a lot of harm. I don’t see what deliberate ignorance has to do with being ChristianThe creation v. evolution argument only seems to occur in my humble opinion at the extremes of both the creationists and the Richard Dawkins style evolutionists. The thinking people I know simply shrug their shoulders and say there is nothing new to see here.
I’ll argue with a science denier in a hot minute . I don’t see how bible based ignorance and superstition make anything better and it causes a lot of harm
Why?
It doesn't change a thing as I said the extremes of either side of that ridiculous debate are not going to change their minds, so all you really achieve is a level of frustration for yourself and provide them with the entertainment they desire.
To be fair on the English, their cuisine has suffered through the past century from food rationing during the wars and then the rise of convenience foods,
I'll tell you truly, I think that there is harm done by this debate, but it is very subtle harm, and difficult to articulate. I will try. The harm that the Young Earth Creationism versus Theistic Evolution debate does is that it takes people who are otherwise natural allies in a world where there is very aggressive evil stalking the corridors of power, with greater and greater influence, and it turns them into enemies who cannot thereafter reconcile even in the face of what ought to be a common foe.
Many's the time that I have been accused on this board and elsewhere, including face of face by kin or classmates, of being evil, or against God, or some other dark and terrible thing, because my theology does not match this other Christian's theology. I don't forget these things, or laugh them off. In the past, sometimes, I resorted to the same sort of rhetoric in reverse, but I don't do that anymore: it's not me.
The accusations are so aggressive, and so offensive, that I take these people at their word, and see them as the enemies they are. Now, trouble is, I believe in God as strongly as they do, and believe my theology is right with the same fervor they have. So, then, if in their eyes I am Satan's ally, because my theology is, according to them, the exact opposite of theirs, I flip the logic around and think the same thing in reverse.
"Well, I know I'm on God's side, and I know how I came into this conversation with goodwill even if we disagree, but you have told me that I am literally evil, that what I believe is the direct opposite of your beliefs. I didn't think so, but since you put it that way, yeah, I guess it's true, what you believe really IS pretty much the opposite of me, and I KNOW I'm with God, and that what I believe is good and holy, so what, then, does that make you?"
"It makes you an agent of the Devil. NO WONDER you are so filled with hate and illogic. The Devil has poisoned your mind and turned you into this snarling beast. OF COURSE, then, I cannot be your ally or your friend. You hate me BECAUSE I am with God. You can't help it. The evil flows out of you. OF COURSE, then, I'll side with some non-Christian or secular over you - you're an evil Devil-filled fanatic trying to use God for your own evil views. YOU are the enemy."
"So, I didn't care about evolution either way, either, but YOU care so much about it that you're calling me evil and ungodly because I don't think what you do about Genesis? You're a scary idolator, a religious fanatic, the kind that burnt witches and justified slavery. You are the enemy. The non-religious, the Jews, the Muslims, the seculars, ANYBODY who is less of an evil fanatic is better than YOU!"
And thus it is that Christians divide, and are conquered. If you're making evolution the litmus test of faith, then we're not going to be friends, because evolution was the litmus test for MY faith: I could not believe in the Christian or any OTHER God that required me to reject my knowledge of science. The Catholic Church surprised me when the priest said to me: "God made the heavens and the earth, and evolution is probably how he did it". It was THAT statement that made me eagerly return to the Church of my baptism. I reject any god that denies evolution: that god doesn't exist.
The Catholic God doesn't reject evolution, so he very well COULD Be the real God, and I believe that he is. Because the REAL God created the world over oceans of time through majestic natural laws and processes.
If you believe in "POOF", I can be your friend. I don't care what you believe. But if you won't be my friend if I don't believe in poof, then you're an enemy, and one who is too stupid for me to enjoy your company anyway. Go marry your sister or something, because that's what your type does.
And THAT is why this debate does such harm. It breeds hatred.
Because I teach science classes every once in a while
The creation v. evolution argument only seems to occur in my humble opinion at the extremes of both the creationists and the Richard Dawkins style evolutionists. The thinking people I know simply shrug their shoulders and say there is nothing new to see here.
Concerning your "funny" rating on the video, and that's fine, but it doesn't tell me much. Did you watch the video? And can you offer your own explanation of some of the scripture Murray explains in his own way as proof there were other ages?
I ask because, first, I don't know if he's right or not, but it would certainly fill in some popular blanks, and because I would like to hear others opinions on the scripture, and what exactly it means if it's not what he says it means. I'll assume for the moment you watched the video and know what scripture I refer to.
Hi K. I didn't watch it all the way through I watched enough to know I have heard it all before and as I said in my post "there is nothing new to see here...". If it is offensive I will remove my funny rating and make it optimistic if you like.
No, not at all, as I already stated that's fine, I even welcome it, I just need to know why? If you can refute his so-called proof, I'd love to hear another explanation for that scripture that I personally don't understand at all.
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