Jesus says there is no love bigger than this (
John 5:13).
I don't see the correlation there that Jesus is saying "there is no love bigger than this".
John 5:13 Now the man who had been healed did not know who it was, for Jesus had withdrawn, as there was a crowd in the place.
Of course He can only have a loving relationship with those who follow him, but that same love is for all men.
Is that not contradictory?
I don't think God is telling every man to repent if it wasn't possible for everyone.
And that is the role of the hypothetical objector in Romans 9.
Romans 9:19-23 You will say to me then, “
Why does he still find fault? For who can resist his will?” (20) But who are you, O man, to answer back to God? Will what is molded say to its molder, “Why have you made me like this?” (21) Has the potter no right over the clay, to make out of the same lump one vessel for honorable use and another for dishonorable use? (22) What if God, desiring to show his wrath and to make known his power, has endured with much patience vessels of wrath prepared for destruction, (23) in order to make known the riches of his glory for vessels of mercy, which he has prepared beforehand for glory—
The whole idea that God loves some people in one way (saving love) and other people with common love (love that doesn't save) is in my opinion a pretty evil idea.
Are you married? If you are, I assume you love your wife. Do you have any neighbors? Do you love them? Would you say that your love for your wife is radically different than your love for your neighbor? I sure hope it is. They are both forms of love, but different. If we as sinful creatures can have differentiation in love, are you saying that God is not allowed to differentiate His love?
If you believe that God's love is the same for every human being that has ever existed, then your disagreement is with Paul.
Romans 9:13-16 As it is written, “Jacob I loved, but Esau I hated.” (14) What shall we say then? Is there injustice on God's part? By no means! (15) For he says to Moses, “I will have mercy on whom I have mercy, and I will have compassion on whom I have compassion.” (16) So then it depends not on human will or exertion, but on God, who has mercy.