Contamination OCD - "evil" objects

[stella55]

Hello everyone, I hope you are doing well and staying healthy despite the difficult times!

I want to ask your opinions about something that has happened to me and that I now can't stop obsessing about.

So about a month ago I was visiting a kind of fair where there were many people selling their hand-made items. I really enjoy going to these fairs and supporting our local artists. At one booth, some people were selling some nice jewelry. I appreciated the design and bought myself a ring from them. And then after I had done that, I noticed, that amongst all, there was also some jewellery with the pentagram symbol! That immediately made me feel sick to the stomach. I felt so bad for having bought something from these people. I rushed home, but my OCD and panic were already acting up.

Needless to say, I am definitely not going to wear that ring. I didn't know what to do with it, so in panic I just wrapped it in cloth and put it in my basement because I didn't want it in my house.

Now, my main concerns with this event are:
1. That I may have offended God by buying something from those people. This was a major concern for me, but I managed to somehow milden these thoughts by praying and going to church, even though I still get my doubts from time to time.
2. That the ring that I bought is contaminated with evil - I keep thinking, what if the jewelry with the pentagram has touched my ring. I feel like everything I have touched after touching the jewelry in the booth is now contaminated: my handbag, my purse, even my coat and scarf, which I haven't worn ever since that day. And I am scared that the evil that is now on these objects could harm me. And anyone with OCD and contamination fears knows how it's like: you feel like the contamination spreads from object to object until it contaminates your whole house. And that's exactly how I feel right now. I even feel like my bathroom sink is contaminated because that's where I washed my hands after coming home that day. And I am also afraid to spread the contamination further, to the people that I meet, and I am afraid that it could somehow harm them.

Now, part of me sort of understands that this is a little illogical and that right now I should be more worried about not bringing the corona virus into my home. But another part of me just can't let go of this event, and it's driving me crazy.

So, do you have any advice for me? Thank you for your replies in advance

 

[Ophiolite]

Have you considered the possibility that the craftsperson who made the jewellery with the pentagram and the people who sold it may just have viewed it, as I do, as an attractive geometrical design? Would it help you think of it that way?

 

[Sabertooth]

So, do you have any advice for me? Thank you for your replies in advance

1. Breathe.
2. Worst-case scenario, it IS a pentagram and dedicated to the devil. Just destroy it. See Acts of the Apostles 19:19.
3. God is not angry with an honest mistake. In fact, He brought it to your attention so you could deal with it appropriately. (Also, your purchase prevented someone else from buying it.)
4. You will make even more ignorant mistakes going forward. God doesn't hate you for that. Just receive His correction, as it is necessary.

 

[stella55]

Thank you both for your replies! I do feel a little better now. Just to clarify, I did not buy a ring with a pentagram. My ring just has a simple, minimalist design without any decorations. I just saw jewelry with the pentagram symbols at the same booth and it made me feel like my ring and anything I touched afterwards was "contaminated" by them.

Have you considered the possibility that the craftsperson who made the jewellery with the pentagram and the people who sold it may just have viewed it, as I do, as an attractive geometrical design? Would it help you think of it that way?

Unfortunately, I think it is what it is. There were also some designs which said "Witch" on them. I have a feeling they were trying to appeal to the youth, since I have noticed such things now being in fashion and being used on youth apparel, which also freaks me out.

Worst-case scenario, it IS a pentagram and dedicated to the devil. Just destroy it. See Acts of the Apostles 19:19.

Any advice on how best to do that? Not something that you could just burn, since it's made of metal. And just throwing it away also makes me feel like I could spread the contamination, since I won't know where it will eventually end up.

 

[Sabertooth]

Any advice on how best to do that? Not something that you could just burn, since it's made of metal. And just throwing it away also makes me feel like I could spread the contamination, since I won't know where it will eventually end up.

What kind of metal is it made of?

You might try

• crushing it in a vise, or
  
• melting it before throwing it away;
• cutting it into three or more pieces (using a rented bolt-cutter [wear goggles]), before throwing them away, separately; or
  
• asking your pastor for ideas...

 

[WDSobieski]

My suggestions are just sit back and relax, also reflect on Romans 14.

I bought a silver Celtic Triquetra pendant ( can also be interpreted as the Trinity among early Christians there) which the store also sold pagan pendants. Personally I just don't believe in these things so there's no fuss about buying things from stores like that. Same for me wearing natural crystals despite their popular association with esoteric practices, they're just some pretty stones without powers.

However, not everyone could withstand it and that might be quite uncomfortable to them. Romans 14 is quite a handy quick reference on modern aspects like watching certain films or listening to certain bands, wearing certain clothes (remember the days with huge boycotts on A&F/ Hollister or Hot Topic?). While personally by appearance and personality people would be utterly shocked when they realise I'm Christian, since I'm certainly too "rad" and "secularised" to many. While I don't think my hobbies would stumble but often at churches or when meeting my more traditionally Christian friends, I'd remove whatever things (crystal bracelets, pop cultural things and more suggestive clothes) which they might find uncomfortable.

 

[Mari17]

Hello everyone, I hope you are doing well and staying healthy despite the difficult times!

I want to ask your opinions about something that has happened to me and that I now can't stop obsessing about.

So about a month ago I was visiting a kind of fair where there were many people selling their hand-made items. I really enjoy going to these fairs and supporting our local artists. At one booth, some people were selling some nice jewelry. I appreciated the design and bought myself a ring from them. And then after I had done that, I noticed, that amongst all, there was also some jewellery with the pentagram symbol! That immediately made me feel sick to the stomach. I felt so bad for having bought something from these people. I rushed home, but my OCD and panic were already acting up.

Needless to say, I am definitely not going to wear that ring. I didn't know what to do with it, so in panic I just wrapped it in cloth and put it in my basement because I didn't want it in my house.

Now, my main concerns with this event are:
1. That I may have offended God by buying something from those people. This was a major concern for me, but I managed to somehow milden these thoughts by praying and going to church, even though I still get my doubts from time to time.
2. That the ring that I bought is contaminated with evil - I keep thinking, what if the jewelry with the pentagram has touched my ring. I feel like everything I have touched after touching the jewelry in the booth is now contaminated: my handbag, my purse, even my coat and scarf, which I haven't worn ever since that day. And I am scared that the evil that is now on these objects could harm me. And anyone with OCD and contamination fears knows how it's like: you feel like the contamination spreads from object to object until it contaminates your whole house. And that's exactly how I feel right now. I even feel like my bathroom sink is contaminated because that's where I washed my hands after coming home that day. And I am also afraid to spread the contamination further, to the people that I meet, and I am afraid that it could somehow harm them.

Now, part of me sort of understands that this is a little illogical and that right now I should be more worried about not bringing the corona virus into my home. But another part of me just can't let go of this event, and it's driving me crazy.

So, do you have any advice for me? Thank you for your replies in advance

Is it possible that this is an over-reaction caused by OCD? I'm wondering if it's logical to think that the jewelry that you bought is contaminated by touching a pentagram. If that were the case, we'd have to way over-think everything that we buy, because it may have at some point touched something "bad." Is it possible that through Jesus' grace and sanctification in our lives, the 'neutral' things in our lives (such as objects) can be considered 'clean'?

 

[stella55]

My suggestions are just sit back and relax, also reflect on Romans 14.

I bought a silver Celtic Triquetra pendant ( can also be interpreted as the Trinity among early Christians there) which the store also sold pagan pendants. Personally I just don't believe in these things so there's no fuss about buying things from stores like that. Same for me wearing natural crystals despite their popular association with esoteric practices, they're just some pretty stones without powers.

However, not everyone could withstand it and that might be quite uncomfortable to them. Romans 14 is quite a handy quick reference on modern aspects like watching certain films or listening to certain bands, wearing certain clothes (remember the days with huge boycotts on A&F/ Hollister or Hot Topic?). While personally by appearance and personality people would be utterly shocked when they realise I'm Christian, since I'm certainly too "rad" and "secularised" to many. While I don't think my hobbies would stumble but often at churches or when meeting my more traditionally Christian friends, I'd remove whatever things (crystal bracelets, pop cultural things and more suggestive clothes) which they might find uncomfortable.

Thank you for the reply! It is very interesting to hear about your experiences. I tried reading Romans 14, but I had some trouble and I am not quite sure how it could be applied to my experience. Could you please explain what you meant by that a little more?

Is it possible that this is an over-reaction caused by OCD? I'm wondering if it's logical to think that the jewelry that you bought is contaminated by touching a pentagram. If that were the case, we'd have to way over-think everything that we buy, because it may have at some point touched something "bad." Is it possible that through Jesus' grace and sanctification in our lives, the 'neutral' things in our lives (such as objects) can be considered 'clean'?

Yes, it is definitely an overreaction of OCD. Like I said, I sort if understand that all of this is slightly illogical, but at the same time I feel like I should clean everything "just in case" so as not to spread the "contamination" further. And I am really anxious about it because I feel like it has already spread so much, for example the clothes that I wore that day and then hung in my closet touched other clothes that are now also "contaminated", and so on, and so on...

I like your ideas very much, but my OCD makes me doubt everything. I really wish I could believe that I have nothing to worry about, but it's just so difficult!

 

[stella55]

So I had a mild relapse today. I was organising the clothes in my closet, taking out the winter clothes and preparing the summer ones. And then I started panicking about the "contamination" issue again. As I had mentioned before, I had the feeling that the clothes that I wore on the day of the incident may have "contaminated" other clothes that they touched. So I started categorising the clothes into the ones that had definitely touched those clothes and thus were definitely "contaminated", ones that are less contaminated and ones that are "clean". I put them all into separate bags. The problem is, my washing machine had broken down some time ago, and I was using a self-service laundry near my home until I can buy a new machine, but recently I found out that the place was shut down. So at the moment I can't even wash my clothes to provide me the feeling that they are at least somewhat cleaner. And I considered a lot of my clothes as "contaminated", so I am really left with not many "clean" clothes to choose from.

So now I feel dirty and anxious again.

I am aware that all of this is getting a little ridiculous. I am just curious, theoretically, could such an object really "spread evil" or do any other harm? I am sorry if my questions are weird. I must admit that I am still relatively new to Christianity and don't know many of the things, but I am happy that you guys are helping me out.

 

[Sabertooth]

I am just curious, theoretically, could such an object really "spread evil" or do any other harm?

Not generally, I wouldn't assume such without confirmation (from someone who doesn't have OCD).

 

[stella55]

I think I might have finally understood where my fears are coming from because I remembered a certain incident. In school, I had a very religious teacher. One time, she noticed that a classmate of mine was wearing a bracelet with a skull decoration on it. She became very outraged and told her that she needs to get rid of that bracelet, but she has to bury it in a desolate field or forest where there are no people living close, because the skull symbol brings death and that people will die (not even may - *will*) if they get close to that bracelet.

Back then, we all kind of laughed it off afterwards and I didn't really believe in what the teacher had said. But I guess that that incident stayed in my subconscious mind nevertheless. Maybe that's why I now feel that certain objects and symbols can bring harm.

 

[Not Perfect]

Hi stella55! I think the first thing that you must keep in mind is that God is bigger than Satan. If you have been saved, there is a big, spiritual stamp on your soul that says "Property of God", and you are protected from the devil. Even if someone came and burnt a pentagram in your front yard with gasoline, it could not hurt you, because God is with you. "The Lord is faithful. He will establish you and guard you against the evil one." - 2 Thessalonians 3:3. (You might find Psalm 91:1, Psalm 23:4, Proverbs 18:10, Psalm 121:7-8, and Proverbs 30:5 comforting.)

I agree with the user who suggested you read Romans 14. I also think that 1 Corinthians 8-10 might apply here. Basically, what these two chapters discuss is the idea of eating meat sacrificed to idols. Back when the Bible was written, there were certain times during the year that the pagans would hold festivals for their idols. As part of their idol worship, they would sacrifice animals to these idols. Afterwards, vendors would sell the sacrificed meat, and it would generally be very cheap (since they sacrificed a lot of idols at once). Many Christians would buy this meat to consume, seeing it as just cheap meat, nothing more. However, others felt that by eating the meat, they were participating in the idol-worship. In general, it was new believers, who not too long ago worshipped idols themselves, who felt like they were sinning by eating meat. More mature believers often thought it wasn't a big deal; meat is mead. In these two passages, Paul reassures his readers that eating meat sacrificed to idols is not a sin in and of itself, saying that "an idol is nothing, and meat sacrificed to idols is nothing". However, a new believer might have what Paul calls a "weak conscience", and feel that by eating the meat they are sinning or taking part in the idol worship. Those of weak conscience are "defiled" by it. Likewise, if you go to an unbeliever's house and eat meat sacrificed to idols, they might think you agree with their idol-worship.

I'm not a Bible scholar, but I think most people interpret this verse to mean that there are a lot of "gray areas" in our faith. I think your situation might fall into one of these. One person might think that it's okay to keep the ring. After all, it's just a piece of jewelry. I've bought clothing from stores that also sell skimpy clothing or t-shirts with vulgar slogans. Yet, I don't worry about that, because there was nothing bad about the things I bought. On the other hand, a lot of Christians might think that you shouldn't keep it. If you associate it in your mind with the pentagram you saw, you might feel as though you are entertaining thoughts of evil spiritual forces. My advice would be this: Just like meat sacrificed to idols is just meat, which is chewed up and swallowed and eventually comes out the other end, I think your ring is just a ring, which you wear on your body but has no power either to defile or sanctify anything inside your head or your heart. However, because it makes you uncomfortable, I recommend that you get rid of it. Go throw it in the river, or better yet, come up with some fun and creative way to destroy it! But do not do anything about the clothes that it has touched or whatever. I have OCD and have been down that road. Trust me, it becomes an all-consuming obsession, and it undermined my faith in God. I felt like my spiritual well-being relied not on trusting God and following him, but on making sure that everything was free of "contamination".

As for your first worry, that you might have offended God by buying that, don't give it another thought. Pray to God and ask for forgiveness if you feel guilty. Then forget about it. As with the meat example, it is not the meat itself that defiles, but the fact that the person believes they are participating in sinful activity by eating. Likewise, when you bought the ring, you did not know that the owners also sold pentagrams. You were ignorant, so you did not sin. It is for this reason that Paul encourages believers to "eat whatever is put before you without raising questions of conscience". It is not the thing itself that defiles, but the attitude with which it is used.

If it makes you feel any better, my dad is a Christian and a math professor, and he often uses pentagrams to teach his students about angles. Apparently they have a lot of interesting mathematical properties. He knows that this is a spiritual symbol to some, but he knows is able to separate the religious significance from the mathematical significance (and in teaching about math, he actually comes closer to God by appreciate the beauty and logic of his creation!) If that makes you feel any better....

I will leave you with a quote from CS Lewis. He says, that there are "two equal and opposite errors into which our race can fall about the devils." One error "is to disbelieve in their existence. The other is to believe and to feel an excessive and unhealthy interest in them." There are real, powerful, evil forces out there, and they should be taken seriously. But we shouldn't be paralyzed by fear of them. I imagine that you have spent a lot more time than usual thinking about the devil in the past month or so.

 

[stella55]

Hi stella55! I think the first thing that you must keep in mind is that God is bigger than Satan. If you have been saved, there is a big, spiritual stamp on your soul that says "Property of God", and you are protected from the devil. Even if someone came and burnt a pentagram in your front yard with gasoline, it could not hurt you, because God is with you. "The Lord is faithful. He will establish you and guard you against the evil one." - 2 Thessalonians 3:3. (You might find Psalm 91:1, Psalm 23:4, Proverbs 18:10, Psalm 121:7-8, and Proverbs 30:5 comforting.)

I agree with the user who suggested you read Romans 14. I also think that 1 Corinthians 8-10 might apply here. Basically, what these two chapters discuss is the idea of eating meat sacrificed to idols. Back when the Bible was written, there were certain times during the year that the pagans would hold festivals for their idols. As part of their idol worship, they would sacrifice animals to these idols. Afterwards, vendors would sell the sacrificed meat, and it would generally be very cheap (since they sacrificed a lot of idols at once). Many Christians would buy this meat to consume, seeing it as just cheap meat, nothing more. However, others felt that by eating the meat, they were participating in the idol-worship. In general, it was new believers, who not too long ago worshipped idols themselves, who felt like they were sinning by eating meat. More mature believers often thought it wasn't a big deal; meat is mead. In these two passages, Paul reassures his readers that eating meat sacrificed to idols is not a sin in and of itself, saying that "an idol is nothing, and meat sacrificed to idols is nothing". However, a new believer might have what Paul calls a "weak conscience", and feel that by eating the meat they are sinning or taking part in the idol worship. Those of weak conscience are "defiled" by it. Likewise, if you go to an unbeliever's house and eat meat sacrificed to idols, they might think you agree with their idol-worship.

I'm not a Bible scholar, but I think most people interpret this verse to mean that there are a lot of "gray areas" in our faith. I think your situation might fall into one of these. One person might think that it's okay to keep the ring. After all, it's just a piece of jewelry. I've bought clothing from stores that also sell skimpy clothing or t-shirts with vulgar slogans. Yet, I don't worry about that, because there was nothing bad about the things I bought. On the other hand, a lot of Christians might think that you shouldn't keep it. If you associate it in your mind with the pentagram you saw, you might feel as though you are entertaining thoughts of evil spiritual forces. My advice would be this: Just like meat sacrificed to idols is just meat, which is chewed up and swallowed and eventually comes out the other end, I think your ring is just a ring, which you wear on your body but has no power either to defile or sanctify anything inside your head or your heart. However, because it makes you uncomfortable, I recommend that you get rid of it. Go throw it in the river, or better yet, come up with some fun and creative way to destroy it! But do not do anything about the clothes that it has touched or whatever. I have OCD and have been down that road. Trust me, it becomes an all-consuming obsession, and it undermined my faith in God. I felt like my spiritual well-being relied not on trusting God and following him, but on making sure that everything was free of "contamination".

As for your first worry, that you might have offended God by buying that, don't give it another thought. Pray to God and ask for forgiveness if you feel guilty. Then forget about it. As with the meat example, it is not the meat itself that defiles, but the fact that the person believes they are participating in sinful activity by eating. Likewise, when you bought the ring, you did not know that the owners also sold pentagrams. You were ignorant, so you did not sin. It is for this reason that Paul encourages believers to "eat whatever is put before you without raising questions of conscience". It is not the thing itself that defiles, but the attitude with which it is used.

If it makes you feel any better, my dad is a Christian and a math professor, and he often uses pentagrams to teach his students about angles. Apparently they have a lot of interesting mathematical properties. He knows that this is a spiritual symbol to some, but he knows is able to separate the religious significance from the mathematical significance (and in teaching about math, he actually comes closer to God by appreciate the beauty and logic of his creation!) If that makes you feel any better....

I will leave you with a quote from CS Lewis. He says, that there are "two equal and opposite errors into which our race can fall about the devils." One error "is to disbelieve in their existence. The other is to believe and to feel an excessive and unhealthy interest in them." There are real, powerful, evil forces out there, and they should be taken seriously. But we shouldn't be paralyzed by fear of them. I imagine that you have spent a lot more time than usual thinking about the devil in the past month or so.

Thank you so, so much for taking your time to give me such a lengthy and detailed explanation. It was very interesting to read and has definitely helped me a lot!

Even though my obsession has definitely put me in a dark place, I often also felt a strong sense of calamity and inner peace. I believe that it was God telling me that everything is going to be alright. So even though I am still a bit anxious from time to time, I am trying to avoid seeking complete control over the situation and just trust God.

I am really touched by everyone's replies amd support. Thank you so much!!

 

[stella55]

Hi everyone! It's me again.

So I've had a relatively good period with my contamination OCD having retreated. I was actually feeling quite relaxed and calm lately. Of course, there still had been a few situations that had triggered my contamination fears again, but I somehow managed to take control over them through my faith in God and the knowledge that I have gained on this forum. I am learning to just really trust God, that He will protect me, that He will take care of the things that I am unable to do myself and that He doesn't want me to live in constant fear of everything. And it was really going well, I started gaining more confidence and slowly began to lose my fears. There have been many situations where I have felt God's presence and blessings.

But, today I experienced a trigger again. So I was browsing this forum and came across this thread that discusses curses and cursed objects. I couldn't help myself and started reading all the replies. Of course, there are many opinions on this topic. But, many people have mentioned that you can get "cursed" solely by believing that you are or by thinking about evil stuff a lot. So I am just wondering, are the obsessions caused by OCD the same thing? Because as you know, OCD just makes us think about things we don't really want to be thinking about.

Here is what I am mainly worried about:
In the past, really more than 10 years ago, a family member of mine used to watch many TV shows that featured paranormal topics and psychics. Very often I was also in the room at the time and sort of overheard everything that was being said on the TV. Anyway, the psychics consulted people on their problems, and many times came to the conclusion that those people were cursed. They made it sound like curses were just everywhere and that it was really very easy to get cursed. There were also stories about evil spirits. They told the names of those spirits and all. And some time later, my OCD kind of remembered all those stories on the show and started bullying me with them. I experienced a similar fear that many people with OCD get at some point - that when I was praying, I was actually praying to those evil spirits and asking them for help and not God, and so on. It didn't help that the spirits were named, because my OCD would then randomly shout those names and that made everything feel much more real. Furthermore, my OCD started blurting insults at them, and that of course made me feel like I will make them angry and that they will come after me. That was probably the darkest period of my life, I was feeling petrified all the time and really believed that I will go crazy eventually. I didn't, of course, and somehow managed to get away from that obsession, but it was such a traumatic experience, that it still left a deep scar on me. To this day, I still tend to avoid some things associated with those stories seen on that TV show.

Well, anyway, after reading that topic today these fears returned again. Since many of replies mentioned the power of our own thoughts, I started ruminating whether I really could have opened a door to those evil spirits through my thoughts, which of course were not my own thoughts at all, but rather intrusive thoughts caused by my OCD. I started counting every bad thing that has happened to me or my family and started wondering whether they were caused by evil forces, just because I used to think about them so much. Is fearing it the same as believing it?

And then I also have moments where I feel like I am not worthy of God's protection because I am a bad Christian, I feel like I am still doing many things wrong, because as I mentioned, I am still relatively new to Christianity (I have always believed in God and prayed to Him, but my family wasn't religious so no one went to church or taught me the basics, I am sort of slowly discovering everything by myself now). Therefore I feel like my faith might still be too weak for me to be properly protected, and so on.

I was working so hard on getting rid of my contamination fears and magical thinking, but I still feel very vulnerable, and I really don't want to relapse again.

 

[stella55]

Anyone?
I'm not feeling too well again.
This may sound ridiculous, but I bought a new washing machine and then noticed that it was made in the country I associate with those stories of evil spirits (which is where the TV shows I mentioned were from). Since then, I've been trying really hard to tame my OCD and not to give in to its ridiculous suggestions. But it requires so much energy and is making me really tired. I don't want to start viewing my washing machine as a "dangerous" object, which my OCD is trying really hard to do.
And even though I probably shouldn't, I keep stumbling upon similar threads about spirits and cursed objects here on this forum and keep reading them. There are some replies that calm me down, and some that trigger my anxiety. I am really confused. I don't know if I'm in danger because of what used to go on in my head, which I described in my previous reply.
I am so scared and I feel like I might fall back into my dark abyss any time.

 

[Lexia]

Anyone?
I'm not feeling too well again.
This may sound ridiculous, but I bought a new washing machine and then noticed that it was made in the country I associate with those stories of evil spirits (which is where the TV shows I mentioned were from). Since then, I've been trying really hard to tame my OCD and not to give in to its ridiculous suggestions. But it requires so much energy and is making me really tired. I don't want to start viewing my washing machine as a "dangerous" object, which my OCD is trying really hard to do.
And even though I probably shouldn't, I keep stumbling upon similar threads about spirits and cursed objects here on this forum and keep reading them. There are some replies that calm me down, and some that trigger my anxiety. I am really confused. I don't know if I'm in danger because of what used to go on in my head, which I described in my previous reply.
I am so scared and I feel like I might fall back into my dark abyss any time.

Hi Stella,

Hope you are doing well. My name is Lexia- I actually stumbled upon this forum because there is someone in my life who I love very much (and does not currently identify as a Christian, although, in his younger years, he did) who has OCD. I read this thread and I made a Christian Forums account (I didn't initially have one) account to reach out to you. I am a Christian and I do not have OCD, but I have watched my loved one struggle greatly with OCD and doubt.

I don't know if what I am about to share with you now will be helpful to you, but I pray the Holy Spirit will move through me to say this to you:

You are loved, beyond what you could imagine, by the Father, Son and Holy Spirit. You belong to God no matter what the anxiety you feel may tell you and no matter what the OCD may reiterate. The Lord is much, much bigger than any possible contamination. These are small matters to him.

“For My thoughts are not your thoughts,
Nor are your ways My ways,” says the Lord.
For as the heavens are higher than the earth,
So are My ways higher than your ways,
And My thoughts than your thoughts." (Isaiah 55: 8-9)

When you seek the Father, you will find rest in him. John 16:33 says, "These things I have spoken to you, so that in Me you may have peace. In the world you have tribulation, but take courage; I have overcome the world.” Christ defeated curses and contamination- with your life in His hands, you are also an overcomer.

There is rest in him DESPITE how we may feel, and He loves you despite any intrusive thought you may experience. One of my favorite prayers in the world is from Mark 9:24 :

"Immediately the father of the child cried out and said with tears, 'Lord, I believe; help my unbelief!'"

May the Lord bless you and keep you safe in his everlasting arms. You have been saved in Christ Jesus; ask the Holy Spirit to draw near to you.

Our lives cannot be plucked from His hand.

https://www.accounseling.org/wp-con...-for-Christians-With-OCD-and-Scrupulosity.pdf

I did a little bit of searching and found this^.

As I know reassurance can sometimes feed the OCD "loop", I hope that after you take the time to read and pray, you spend some time resting (literally resting your body) and checking in with yourself: are you hungry? do you need to stretch or take a walk? what is something sensory (a smell or texture) that can bring you comfort?

If you are finding you are having significant difficulty with your OCD, don't be afraid to seek support in addition to your prayer and supplication (such as counselling or medication). OCD is an illness and can be debilitating. Mind health is a part of body health and there is no shame in going to the doctor when you feel ill. Just know there is also healing in the peace of Christ, who defeated death because of His great love for us.

I am praying for you, in the name of Christ our Savior Much love to you.

 

[stella55]

Hi Stella,

Hope you are doing well. My name is Lexia- I actually stumbled upon this forum because there is someone in my life who I love very much (and does not currently identify as a Christian, although, in his younger years, he did) who has OCD. I read this thread and I made a Christian Forums account (I didn't initially have one) account to reach out to you. I am a Christian and I do not have OCD, but I have watched my loved one struggle greatly with OCD and doubt.

I don't know if what I am about to share with you now will be helpful to you, but I pray the Holy Spirit will move through me to say this to you:

You are loved, beyond what you could imagine, by the Father, Son and Holy Spirit. You belong to God no matter what the anxiety you feel may tell you and no matter what the OCD may reiterate. The Lord is much, much bigger than any possible contamination. These are small matters to him.

“For My thoughts are not your thoughts,
Nor are your ways My ways,” says the Lord.
For as the heavens are higher than the earth,
So are My ways higher than your ways,
And My thoughts than your thoughts." (Isaiah 55: 8-9)

When you seek the Father, you will find rest in him. John 16:33 says, "These things I have spoken to you, so that in Me you may have peace. In the world you have tribulation, but take courage; I have overcome the world.” Christ defeated curses and contamination- with your life in His hands, you are also an overcomer.

There is rest in him DESPITE how we may feel, and He loves you despite any intrusive thought you may experience. One of my favorite prayers in the world is from Mark 9:24 :

"Immediately the father of the child cried out and said with tears, 'Lord, I believe; help my unbelief!'"

May the Lord bless you and keep you safe in his everlasting arms. You have been saved in Christ Jesus; ask the Holy Spirit to draw near to you.

Our lives cannot be plucked from His hand.

https://www.accounseling.org/wp-con...-for-Christians-With-OCD-and-Scrupulosity.pdf

I did a little bit of searching and found this^.

As I know reassurance can sometimes feed the OCD "loop", I hope that after you take the time to read and pray, you spend some time resting (literally resting your body) and checking in with yourself: are you hungry? do you need to stretch or take a walk? what is something sensory (a smell or texture) that can bring you comfort?

If you are finding you are having significant difficulty with your OCD, don't be afraid to seek support in addition to your prayer and supplication (such as counselling or medication). OCD is an illness and can be debilitating. Mind health is a part of body health and there is no shame in going to the doctor when you feel ill. Just know there is also healing in the peace of Christ, who defeated death because of His great love for us.

I am praying for you, in the name of Christ our Savior Much love to you.

Thank you so much for the reply. I cannot believe that you made an account only to reach out to me. I am deeply moved by your kindness and started crying while reading your reply. I am sorry that I am unable to give a more lengthy response right now, because I still feel very tired and exhausted from this situation. But just know that what you have written means a lot to me. It did make me feel much better. So once again, thank you

 

[Mari17]

Hi everyone! It's me again.

So I've had a relatively good period with my contamination OCD having retreated. I was actually feeling quite relaxed and calm lately. Of course, there still had been a few situations that had triggered my contamination fears again, but I somehow managed to take control over them through my faith in God and the knowledge that I have gained on this forum. I am learning to just really trust God, that He will protect me, that He will take care of the things that I am unable to do myself and that He doesn't want me to live in constant fear of everything. And it was really going well, I started gaining more confidence and slowly began to lose my fears. There have been many situations where I have felt God's presence and blessings.

But, today I experienced a trigger again. So I was browsing this forum and came across this thread that discusses curses and cursed objects. I couldn't help myself and started reading all the replies. Of course, there are many opinions on this topic. But, many people have mentioned that you can get "cursed" solely by believing that you are or by thinking about evil stuff a lot. So I am just wondering, are the obsessions caused by OCD the same thing? Because as you know, OCD just makes us think about things we don't really want to be thinking about.

Here is what I am mainly worried about:
In the past, really more than 10 years ago, a family member of mine used to watch many TV shows that featured paranormal topics and psychics. Very often I was also in the room at the time and sort of overheard everything that was being said on the TV. Anyway, the psychics consulted people on their problems, and many times came to the conclusion that those people were cursed. They made it sound like curses were just everywhere and that it was really very easy to get cursed. There were also stories about evil spirits. They told the names of those spirits and all. And some time later, my OCD kind of remembered all those stories on the show and started bullying me with them. I experienced a similar fear that many people with OCD get at some point - that when I was praying, I was actually praying to those evil spirits and asking them for help and not God, and so on. It didn't help that the spirits were named, because my OCD would then randomly shout those names and that made everything feel much more real. Furthermore, my OCD started blurting insults at them, and that of course made me feel like I will make them angry and that they will come after me. That was probably the darkest period of my life, I was feeling petrified all the time and really believed that I will go crazy eventually. I didn't, of course, and somehow managed to get away from that obsession, but it was such a traumatic experience, that it still left a deep scar on me. To this day, I still tend to avoid some things associated with those stories seen on that TV show.

Well, anyway, after reading that topic today these fears returned again. Since many of replies mentioned the power of our own thoughts, I started ruminating whether I really could have opened a door to those evil spirits through my thoughts, which of course were not my own thoughts at all, but rather intrusive thoughts caused by my OCD. I started counting every bad thing that has happened to me or my family and started wondering whether they were caused by evil forces, just because I used to think about them so much. Is fearing it the same as believing it?

And then I also have moments where I feel like I am not worthy of God's protection because I am a bad Christian, I feel like I am still doing many things wrong, because as I mentioned, I am still relatively new to Christianity (I have always believed in God and prayed to Him, but my family wasn't religious so no one went to church or taught me the basics, I am sort of slowly discovering everything by myself now). Therefore I feel like my faith might still be too weak for me to be properly protected, and so on.

I was working so hard on getting rid of my contamination fears and magical thinking, but I still feel very vulnerable, and I really don't want to relapse again.

I'm so sorry to hear you've been struggling! It sounds like you've learned a lot about how to deal with your OCD. Which means that you know the best way to deal with this is to ignore it, and not to keep researching about this topic online. I know this can be so so hard to do with OCD. We know the truth, but we don't feel the truth; our anxiety makes us feel pressured to give into our compulsions. Are you able to identify what your compulsions are for this theme?

 

[stella55]

I'm so sorry to hear you've been struggling! It sounds like you've learned a lot about how to deal with your OCD. Which means that you know the best way to deal with this is to ignore it, and not to keep researching about this topic online. I know this can be so so hard to do with OCD. We know the truth, but we don't feel the truth; our anxiety makes us feel pressured to give into our compulsions. Are you able to identify what your compulsions are for this theme?

Thank you. The past 7 days have been especially challenging for me, because I had some people come to my house. This has always been difficult for me, because they don't know my "rules" and can spread the "contamination" around. But in the end, it wasn't as bad as I had expected it to be. It actually felt good seeing them touching all of my things and get my house "dirty". I knew there was nothing I could do, and in a way, it felt liberating.

And I actually noticed that I am perhaps more anxious about the anxiety rather than the thing itself. For example, I often catch myself thinking not "oh no, the contamintion will spread", but rather "oh no, the contamintion will spread and trigger my OCD again, and I will become anxious and it will be difficult for me to calm myself down". But most of the time, it ends up being really not as bad.

I still struggle with handwashing though. I've always had this compulsion, and it got even worse during the pandemic. There were periods when I washed my hands after touching every item, so as not to spread the "contamination" to another item. I am trying to cut down on the handwashing, but it's difficult. By now, it's such a big part of me, that it even lost its meaning in a way. Sometimes I'm washing my hands and don't even remember why. What did I touch?
It's a bit easier on days when I have to go to work, because I get to focus on other things, plus I don't feel like the outside world is "contaminated", or rather, it's contaminated in a different way. But I want to keep my house clean, you know? I think it's something that many people with OCD struggle with.
And I also like to clean my stuff with wet wipes. Bad for the environment!
So yeah, I still need to work on that.

 

[Not Perfect]

Thank you. The past 7 days have been especially challenging for me, because I had some people come to my house. This has always been difficult for me, because they don't know my "rules" and can spread the "contamination" around. But in the end, it wasn't as bad as I had expected it to be. It actually felt good seeing them touching all of my things and get my house "dirty". I knew there was nothing I could do, and in a way, it felt liberating.

I'm glad that having other people around has helped! I find that being around other people helps me as well. It's like when I'm alone, I have control over my environment, and I am free to indulge in my bad habits. When I have other people around, I have to either get over myself to some degree, or look like a total loon by demanding they follow my preferences. I think that's a reason so many people with OCD are deliberately over-involved, making sure every minute is filled with some task, activity, social obligation, or volunteer job. Being alone is not a recipe for success. My brain is not very good company.

And I actually noticed that I am perhaps more anxious about the anxiety rather than the thing itself. For example, I often catch myself thinking not "oh no, the contamintion will spread", but rather "oh no, the contamintion will spread and trigger my OCD again, and I will become anxious and it will be difficult for me to calm myself down". But most of the time, it ends up being really not as bad.

I read about a guy that had a similar problem. He had an obsession about developing a hand-washing compulsion. He was terrified of becoming a compulsive washer, so he had to force himself to wash his hands. He never actually developed a hand-washing compulsion.

I still struggle with handwashing though. I've always had this compulsion, and it got even worse during the pandemic. There were periods when I washed my hands after touching every item, so as not to spread the "contamination" to another item. I am trying to cut down on the handwashing, but it's difficult. By now, it's such a big part of me, that it even lost its meaning in a way. Sometimes I'm washing my hands and don't even remember why. What did I touch?

That sucks. Washing is hard in a pandemic like this. If nothing else, I think it's given the rest of the world a tiny taste of what it is like to have OCD, because it seems like everyone is now a compulsive washer. I'm like, "You know how scared you feel when you come back from the grocery store and haven't washed your hands yet? Well, we feel like that all the time."