Atheism?

[Zico1234]

I think this is the right forum. My apologies if I'm wrong, there's a lot of them on here.

I've been an atheist all my life. My family aren't religious, I haven't been baptised, and I do not believe in God. Up to this point I've been perfectly happy with this, but now, not so much.
For about a year now, I've had a girlfriend, who is christian. Her family are christian. They all go to church. I've been to church twice in my whole life, both times in my primary school for christmas. It was a Church of England school, so it was pretty much necessary.
Her family basically hate my guts for not being Christian, and recently she's started worrying about the second coming of Christ. I can't remember exactly what it's called, sorry, but I think you'll all know what I'm talking about.
She wants me to become Christian because she doesn't want me to go to hell. As I've said, I don't believe in God, nor do I believe in hell.
I don't want her to keep worrying like this, but I don't know what to do about it. I want to believe in God. But I can't. I find the whole religion really unbelievable, and no matter what I try, it doesn't work.
I just want some help with it, I guess. You can quote bible verses, but it won't make any difference to me, and because of that, I'm really just not sure what to do. Is there *anything* that would actually make me believe in it?
Thanks.

 

[Zico1234]

Oh poo, it shows me as female. In that case, I want to make it clear that I am not, under any circumstances, trying to change my sexuality, and I will not attempt to do so. I'm sorry, I'm just perfectly happy being bisexual, and I do not intend on giving my girlfriend up for anything.

Edit: And I now find the edit button. Sorry. D:

 

[seashale76]

Nobody can argue another person in the Kingdom of Heaven. God draws people to Himself.

I will encourage you to at least read about Church history and educate yourself about Christianity. For what it's worth, I'll keep you and your situation in my prayers.

Some things to read to get you started (most from an Orthodox perspective):
Excerpts from the Orthodox Church by Bishop Kallistos Ware (part 1)
Excerpts from the Orthodox Church by Bishop Kallistos Ware (part 2)
http://www.fatheralexander.org/booklets/english/pocket_church_history.htm

Jaroslav Pelikan was one of the better known and respected scholars of the history of Christianity and wrote this (if you're interested):
The Christian Tradition: A History of the Development of Doctrine, 5 vols. (1973–1990). Chicago: University of Chicago Press
Volume 1: The Emergence of the Catholic Tradition 100–600 (1973) ISBN 0-226-65371-4
Volume 2: The Spirit of Eastern Christendom 600–1700 (1974) ISBN 0-226-65373-0
Volume 3: The Growth of Medieval Theology 600–1300 (1978) ISBN 0-226-65375-7
Volume 4: Reformation of Church and Dogma 1300–1700 (1984) ISBN 0-226-65377-3
Volume 5: Christian Doctrine and Modern Culture since 1700 (1990) ISBN 0-226-65380-3

Now, regarding her family: Without knowing the particulars, it is difficult to ascertain whether they simply have a personality conflict with you, or if it really is your lack of religion that disturbs them. You can only control your actions and how you respond to people- you can't change others. Tell your friend that we've been in the end times since the resurrection. While repentance is of vital importance to the Christian, actually getting worked up with fear and worry over the second coming of Christ isn't what we should be doing.

 

[singpeace]

I kept thinking, "What if...?" What if Christ is real? What if there is a Father in heaven Who loves me? What if I can live in heaven for all time?

I decided to give God the opportunity to make a believer out of me.

I put a challenge to God to prove to me beyond a shadow of a doubt that He, His Son, and the whole story of salvation were real. He had to convince me.

I decided to sit alone in the quiet every day for 30 min. for two weeks and if God was real, He would show up somehow (I didn't know how), and I would KNOW. After two weeks, if He hadn't done something... and no one else but him... then I would know; for me, that I'd given it my best shot and it just wasn't real afterall.

I'll just say that I didn't have to wait two days. He did convince me; and that was 20 years ago. Since then, I can say with all honesty that I have not doubted Him once.
He is alive and nothing can ever convince me otherwise.

 

[drich0150]

Is there *anything* that would actually make me believe in it?

You have to want to believe and if you ever find yourself wanting to believe then all you have to do is ask God to Help you believe.

 

[aiki]

I've been an atheist all my life. My family aren't religious, I haven't been baptised, and I do not believe in God. Up to this point I've been perfectly happy with this, but now, not so much.

So, you knew when you were two that there was no God? You were certain when you were eight that God was a figment of people's imagination? You were sure when you were thirteen that God was an impossibility? Really?

For about a year now, I've had a girlfriend, who is christian. Her family are christian. They all go to church.

Going to church does not make you a Christian any more than going to a hospital makes you a doctor. Certainly, your friend's involvement with you strongly suggests that she is not a Christian in the biblical sense of the word.

I've been to church twice in my whole life, both times in my primary school for christmas. It was a Church of England school, so it was pretty much necessary.

Rest assured, we won't hold this against you.

Her family basically hate my guts for not being Christian, and recently she's started worrying about the second coming of Christ. I can't remember exactly what it's called, sorry, but I think you'll all know what I'm talking about.
She wants me to become Christian because she doesn't want me to go to hell. As I've said, I don't believe in God, nor do I believe in hell.

Um, just because you don't believe in God or hell doesn't mean that these things do not exist.

I don't want her to keep worrying like this, but I don't know what to do about it. I want to believe in God. But I can't.

From what you've written, it seems more a matter of "won't" rather than "can't."

I find the whole religion really unbelievable, and no matter what I try, it doesn't work.

What have you tried, exactly?

I just want some help with it, I guess. You can quote bible verses, but it won't make any difference to me, and because of that, I'm really just not sure what to do.

Are you aware of how odd this sounds? "A man convinced against his will is of the same opinion still." If you refuse right from the outset to even consider the idea that God exists, there is no point in trying to convince you otherwise.

Is there *anything* that would actually make me believe in it?
Thanks.

Sure, there are lots of excellent reasons to believe in God. But, you are determined to reject them all, so there's no reason to get into them with you.

Peace.

 

[salida]

Also, read about biblical evidence-www.TheBibleTruthBook.com, and The Evidence That Demands A Verdict by Josh McDowell, Examine The Evidence by Muncaster(a former athiest)

Some Info Below:
Internal Evidence (prophesies confirmed within bible)
Life of Christ
The Tribe of Judah, Gen 49:10 - Luke 3:23-28
(Genesis was written 4004 BC to 1689 BC)
(Lukes time period 60-70 AD)
-------------------------------------------------------------------
Royal Line of David, Jer 23:5 - Matt 1:1
(Jeremiah 760 to 698 BC)/(Matthew 60 - 70 AD)
-------------------------------------------------------------------
Born of a Virgin, Isaiah 7:14 - Matt 1:18-23
(Isaiah 760 to 698 BC)/(Matthew 60 - 70 AD)
-------------------------------------------------------------------
Rise of Empires
In the book of Daniel, Chapter 2 - four kingdoms are described in the interpretation of a dream of
Nebuchadnezzar, king of Babylon: Babylon, Medo-Persia, Greek - Daniel 8:21, 10:20/and the fourth
great kingdom to follow- part iron and clay-which is the Roman Empire. During this empire Christ came and his church was established.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Historical Accuracy
The bible is loaded with historical statements concerning events hundreds of years ago and has not
been proven incorrect in any.
(Bible compared to other ancient documents):
New Testament starts - at 25 years between original and first surviving copies
Homer - starts at 500 years
Demosthenes - at 1400 years
Plato - at 1200 years
Caesar - at 1000 years
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Number of Manuscript Copies-New Testament - 5,686/Homer - 643/Demosthenes - 200/
Plato - 7/Caesar -10
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Consistency/Written by God
Written by at least 40 men over a period of time exceeding 1400 years and has no internal inconsistencies.
It claims to be spoken by God, 2 Timothy 3:16-17. No other religious book makes such claim.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
External Evidences (prophesies outside bible)
These cities were prophesied to be destroyed and never built again.
Nineveh - Nahum 1:10, 3:7,15, Zephaniah 2:13-14
Babylon - Isaiah 13:1-22
Tyre - Ezekiel 26:1-28
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Bible before Science- He hangs the earth on nothing-Job 26:7/Earth is a sphere-Isaiah 40:22
Air has weight-Job 28:25/Gravity-Job 26:7, Job 38:31-33/Winds blow in cyclones, Eccl 1:6
(Job was written at least 1000 years ago; some scholars think 3000 years ago)
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Documents that Prove Bible is True
Gilgamesh Epic, The Sumerian King List, Mari Tablets, Babylonian Chronicles
Archeological Finds
Excavations of Ur, Location of Zoar, Ziggurats and the foundation of Tower of Babel

 

[salida]

An saying is that you can lead a horse to water but you can't make him drink. Thus, we can show you all the evidence in the world but you can choose to ignore it.

 

[aiki]

You know there is a reason that you can't get youself to believe in a god, because he isn't there

By this sort of reasoning it must be, since I can't not believe in God, that He is there.

Hold on to what you know to be the truth, don't let others judge! If she really loves you she will let it go eventually.

This is another statement that cuts both ways. I could say exactly the same thing to the Christian (though I use the term very loosely in this instance) girlfriend.

Oh, by the way, you aren't, as an atheist, supposed to be posting replies to the OP.

Peace.

 

[Coralie]

Hi OP. Tough situation to be in. I was once in a similar position. As you can see, I am no longer an atheist

If I were you, I'd do this:

1. Tell her family (and her) that you'll do your best. You'll go along to Church with her every now and again, and never say anything bad about Christianity, and ask questions when you don't understand. But that you can't force yourself to believe something you don't understand. Be nice. Be sensitive. Don't stand on your pride, or be pompous. (Not that I think you are, it's just that atheists often come across in very unfortunate ways, which causes friction with believers where it could easily be avoided.)

2. Ignore any pompous behaviour on the part of her family--realise that it comes from fear and lack of understanding, not hatred.

3. Keep an open mind. The fact is, you (and I) don't know what lies, for example, beyond the bounds of the physical universe... or indeed what lies beyond the bounds of our extremely rudimentary physical senses. So cultivate some humility and try to remember we humans don't have all the answers.

4. Experiment with faith. Try simply "praying" once a day, on waking--"God, if you are there, I am ready to believe in you. But right now, I'm not sure if you are there. Help me if you can. Amen." Mix this in with the humility you're practicing and just see what happens. You may be surprised.

5. Read up on Christian history, like seashale has suggested. I can guarantee you you'll find some of your preconceptions shattered. Christianity has a rich philosophical and historical tradition that you will find very interesting. It's not all gay-bashing and the Inquisition

 

[Coralie]

And God bless. You have my sympathies. I too was raised atheist in a highly intellectual environment, and had a boyfriend (now husband) who was raised Christian.

It was Battle Royale for about 2 years with us but it had a very surprising ending for all concerned.

God bless you (FWIW). I'm thinking of you and your girl.

 

[aiki]

That sort of reasoning is false the double negation of a true statement is wrong, you're thinking of the contrapositive.

Example: I believe in gravity it exists.
I don't believe in gravity it doesn't exists. Is a fallacy.
I don't believe in gravity it does exist. Is the true contrapositive.

So for the original statement, the true contrapositive is:
I can believe in god, he is not there

Actually, what I wanted to demonstrate was the lack of logic in your statement by offering an equally illogical opposite -- one I was pretty certain you would object to.

Oh, and a double negative construction to a statement doesn't make it necessarily false. Such a construction may make it weaker, but not always unavoidably false.

Simply because one doesn't believe a thing to be true doesn't mean it is therefore necessarily untrue. Likewise, just because one does believe a thing is true doesn't mean it is therefore necessarily true. I'm sure you know this, which makes your statement that "the reason that you can't get yourself to believe in a god is because he isn't there" rather specious.

Peace.

 

[mark46]

MY BOTTOM LINE
Please read the rest below, but the bottom line should be first. Jesus has a very good reputation in this world. It is Christains who have sullied his reputation. Study his ways and consider following him. Muslims and Hindu, Sufi and Buddhist, all agree. In a non-Christain paradigm, Jesus is a master, a great teacher, a prophet, a holy one leading us to the Light.

And when you are ready, consider coming to the places where fellow followers gather and meet him face to face on a regular basis.

Be prepared for the obvious fact that many who call themselves "Christian" do not seem to follow his ways.
===============================================
SOME THOUGHTS

1) The behavior of her family is unacceptable and ultimately unChristain. Badgering folks (and thereatening them with hell) does not lead them to God, although many pastors have belived this for centuries. If you are to change you life, you must find that you present life is unacceptable and see form the example of others that there is a better way.

2) You say that you have been an atheist since you were a child. Perhaps it is time to put away childish things and become open to the possibilties of life.

3) I don't know your background, but the heart of the problems of the few centuries is that, for the first time, many (if not most) believe that the material world is all that there is. They ignore half of reality (some would say, all of reality) and live in an illusion. Perhaps many here would disagree, but the first question must be "is this all there is?". The resounding answer of billlions over the centureis is "no". Here in the US, over 85% of folks believe that there is more than the material world. We are a country of seekers. Many of us seek in all the worong places, but we are seekers nonetheless.

4) In addition, there is real TRUTH. The laws of gravity and thermodynamics are not choices. They are simply true. So it is with God. Whether you believe or not does not change reality. The choice is whether to believe or not.

5) If you like to read, CS Lewis has written great stuff, mostly fantasy that helps us understand the faith. Or read some of Scott Peck. We follow the road less traveled. And yes, buy a version of the New Testament called The Message. You will find it very readable.

6) Many may disagree with me here, so I apologize beforehand. For me, it more important that folks open their minds and hearts to the possibilties and become seekers after the Truth. God has promised to honor that search, wherever you explore: platonism, pagonism, Hindu, Muslim, Sufi, Buddhist or Christain. I truly understand Gandhi's choice to not become Christains because he hadn't met any followers of Jesus,

I think this is the right forum. My apologies if I'm wrong, there's a lot of them on here.

I've been an atheist all my life. My family aren't religious, I haven't been baptised, and I do not believe in God. Up to this point I've been perfectly happy with this, but now, not so much.
For about a year now, I've had a girlfriend, who is christian. Her family are christian. They all go to church. I've been to church twice in my whole life, both times in my primary school for christmas. It was a Church of England school, so it was pretty much necessary.
Her family basically hate my guts for not being Christian, and recently she's started worrying about the second coming of Christ. I can't remember exactly what it's called, sorry, but I think you'll all know what I'm talking about.
She wants me to become Christian because she doesn't want me to go to hell. As I've said, I don't believe in God, nor do I believe in hell.
I don't want her to keep worrying like this, but I don't know what to do about it. I want to believe in God. But I can't. I find the whole religion really unbelievable, and no matter what I try, it doesn't work.
I just want some help with it, I guess. You can quote bible verses, but it won't make any difference to me, and because of that, I'm really just not sure what to do. Is there *anything* that would actually make me believe in it?
Thanks.

 

[Lithp]

To comment on the OP's situation, it's not necessarily true that people are atheists because they "want to be." In my opinion, it'd be pretty awesome if there was someone out there "looking out for us." It would not matter to me if it's one, many, omnipotent, or not. So, why don't I believe in any deities? Same reason the OP does: There is no apparent evidence. It is a case of can't, not won't. Belief is not a choice.

 

[mark46]

I do believe that we should all put away childish things. We are all seekers after the Truth of the Universe.

Funny, that's what I would say to a believer as well. Especially as becoming open to the possibilities of life means accepting nature for what it is, not denying it or attributing it to a supernatural entity.

@OP: Drop the girl man (PS: your profile suggests you are Christian... have you converted already?). Find yourself a nice atheist girl who won't make such demands. Joining a religion just because of a girl is no way to get into that religion.... actually, go and watch Grease, this will teach you that if a girl loves you enough she will become like you <--- sarcasm intended.