Alcoholics and Addicts Discussion/Support Thread

[SOTK]

There hasn't been any action on this thread for a week! I wanted to bump it back up and also check in with all of you. How is every one doing?

 

[MaryBurwell]

I know from experience that pot is a waste of time.

1 Timothy 5:6 says- "But she that liveth in pleasure is dead while she liveth."

That applies to guys, too.

It might be fun for a season, but it keeps you from doing anything productive. You might make some friends but those friendships are one thing that makes it even harder to stop.

Most everyone who smokes pot ends up having something bad happen to them as a result. The bad thing could be the loss of friendships, the loss of lots of money, run ins with the law. Weed causes alot of unnecessary trouble. Some people are able to do it and not run into too many problems but most of those people have been smoking since they were very young. Most of them have to sacrifice other things to keep up their weed habit. Once you start smoking weed you join a group of people pushing for its legalization. Weed comes before your own personal ambitions, then. if you start smoking weed it is like joining a religion. it is not something you want to get yourself involved in. You will make alot of friends that only want you for your money. There are better causes to invest yourself in. When you buy weed from someone you start a relationship with that person. The relationship is built on trust that no matter what you will not do anything that could get them in trouble- ie the law. You automatically have the law as your personal enemy. That is not a good position to put yourself in. When you smoke weed you become a member in a family of people who have very little money. To be a good member of the family you are expected to help the people who help you get the weed survive. If they need help getting out of jail your duty is to put up money. If they need help with anything it is almost always money. Also, it is hard to get away from smoking weed because the friends you make through weed will not support your decision to quit. People are just people. You can make friends lots of different other ways that do not involve sacrificing your life basically. My advice to you- do not try weed. You can get addicted by doing it just once.

 

[greenonion]

Yes, how are you all doing? Especially those who were struggling?

 

[New Creation]

I'll try and give the short version of my recovery and all props to Jesus!!!!!!

I'm pretty sure my mom and dad are alcoholics though highly functioning and unaware ones.
Alcohol and sex were things that made one grown up and listened to in my world, so when I was ignored in that world, that's what I began to do in order to be seen and heard.

I smoked my first cigarette at 11, got drunk at 13, smoked my first joint at 14, sex at 15, acid at 16, speed and cocaine at 19 and the list goes on.

I aborted my baby at 17 and I believe that's when I truly dove headfirst into my career as an alcoholic. I became an exotic dancer at 18- the perfect job- I could get drunk and [fool] around at work and be rewarded for it.

Although I tried every drug available (except heroin- I had a very healthy fear of heroin that probably saved my life) alcohol was my primary lover. I'm a writer and loved the Hemingwayesque image of the 'tortured writer'. I'd drink at least a bottle of wine a night while writing down poor-me pathetic whinings of misery.

This went on for longer than I care to admit.

(I need to mention also that I practised wicca for a decade because I felt a deep need for spirituality while nursing a monstrous hate for "patriarchal" religions.)
When I turned 30, someone had the guts to write me a 15 page letter telling me [how annoying] I was. The letter woke me up long enough for me to decide that I had to "control" my drinking a little better but really I had dozens of episodes that put myself and others in danger even after that realization. I knew I was an alcoholic at that point but was not prepared to quit drinking. The thought of not being able to drink again TERRIFIED me.

Fast forward four messy but functioning years. I'm working a little club in Southern Ontario one evening and decide to have a drink next to the handsome man named Lloyd at the bar instead of working the room. Lloyd and I get along swimmingly and proceed to get plastered together.
However, during the course of the night, Lloyd tells me about this guy "Jesus"- stuff I'd never heard before- stuff about LOVE (?!) and of the entire conversation, the only thing I really remember is the look of LOVE on this man's face when he talked about this JESUS fella.
We sleep together and exchange addresses because he lives 3000 miles away and is only on vacation visiting his mom. I figure we're never going to see each other again but can't get this JESUS stuff out of my wiccan occupied head for days. Stuff starts happening-like Jesus is suddenly popping up EVERYWHERE. I go see my parents for Christmas vacation and feel drawn to go to Christmas Eve service on my own.
Lo and behold, who's at the service? My old manager from one of my favourite clubs to work at- over 400 miles away! He's dropped 100 pounds, quit drinking and smoking and his wife's come back to him- HE LOOKS LIKE A COMPLETELY NEW MAN. He tells me it's this JESUS fellow. Yep.

Lloyd and I talk on the phone a lot. He's telling me a lot about this Jesus fellow. I want to know more and more about him. I fly out to British Columbia to be with Lloyd.
One week later I'm on my knees asking Christ to forgive me and life is a whole different ballgame.

Although nobody told me the stuff I was doing was wrong, the Spirit spoke to me and having been drug up from the PIT where I was slinking before, I was incredibly EAGER to do as He asked. I quit getting drunk ( notice I didn't say I quit drinking?)
I quit smoking- (that's a great story in itself), quit smoking pot and Lloyd and I stopped having sex and decided to wait until we were married. Lloyd had quit drinking as well, knowing that he's an alcoholic.

Still, I got a job waitressing at a pub that summer and after work, I'd have a glass of wine. A couple of times, I had TWO. And I'll tell ya, I REALLY wanted to keep going after those TWO. The edge of the buzz was there at my consciousness and I WANTED it. I MISSED it. Lloyd knew that the deal is- you can't even have ONE. You CAN'T. And I knew it too. But it was like before- I didn't want to give it up!
Finally though, it DID happen again- it was only a matter of time. One drink turned into two into three into four into....
and before I know it I've fallen on my keister at a hockey game in front of everyone. Still- not enough to make me stop. I had to go ONE MORE TIME to realize that I couldn't go ONE MORE TIME.
The morning I woke up with literally the worst hangover of my entire life- a life littered with thousands of hangovers-was when I finally got on my knees and asked him to take it away from me- that I was giving it to Him because I didn't want it anymore. I couldn't do it on my own and THAT MUCH was obvious.
And I am healed. I am. I'll be honest and tell you all that there have been times where I wanted to drink very much- mostly with my family because that is the way we relate to each other- drunk. But with Christ's power, I have been able to resist and walk in FREEDOM!!!!!!! I know that I can never drink again. It doesn't frighten me anymore because my life is full of Him and His blessings.
Lloyd and I married, we are the guardians of our 12 year old nephew, I'm writing, I have this amazing church family and the love of my Saviour.
Life is not perfect every day. In fact, some days, I still wonder what the point is. But it all comes back to Him and His love for me. The fact that He loved me enough to save me from the depths of hell keeps me from wallowing in self pity for too long. I wasn't on that cross, though I tried for the longest time to put myself there. It was HE who suffered for me.
"NO," he said. "I went up there so you don't have to. I love you. Now get down before you hurt yourself."

So I did.

 

[greenonion]

New Creation, that is the most powerful testimony I have ever read. Thank you so much for sharing it.

 

[SOTK]

That's a very awesome and powerful testimony, New Creation! Thank you very much for sharing it! There were aspects to your testimony that I related to. God is truly wonderful beyond what words can say!

In Christ,

SOTK

 

[madison1101]

Hi everyone,
I thought I would drop in and introduce myself. I have been in AA for my alcoholism for fifteen years. I have only been sober for a little less than four of those years. I also go to OA for eating disorders, so the 12 steps have been my support for a while.

My sobriety had been pretty good till lately. I have been finishing a Masters in Social Work, and have done internships in treatment facilities for two years, so drinking was not at all attractive to me. BUT,last week, I had not been to a meeting in a couple of weeks, and I got my stinking thinking going, and was seriously tempted to get drunk. It was so intense it scared me.

I just had to let you know that Satan is alive and well and ready to tempt me any time, any place. I have to keep my spiritual armor in good shape, or I am vulnerable to one of his arrows.

Trish

 

[New Creation]

Hi everyone,
I thought I would drop in and introduce myself. I have been in AA for my alcoholism for fifteen years. I have only been sober for a little less than four of those years. I also go to OA for eating disorders, so the 12 steps have been my support for a while.

My sobriety had been pretty good till lately. I have been finishing a Masters in Social Work, and have done internships in treatment facilities for two years, so drinking was not at all attractive to me. BUT,last week, I had not been to a meeting in a couple of weeks, and I got my stinking thinking going, and was seriously tempted to get drunk. It was so intense it scared me.

I just had to let you know that Satan is alive and well and ready to tempt me any time, any place. I have to keep my spiritual armor in good shape, or I am vulnerable to one of his arrows.

Trish

Wow Trish- hey!!! YOU DID IT! YOu did not give in. Glory to GOD in the HIGHEST!
Do you have any Christian friends with whom you can relate about your alcoholism?

 

[BlondieLashes]

Hi New Creation! I am new to the boards and very happy to find you and your post! I too am a former "exotic dancer" that has come back to the Lord and left "the industry" about four years ago!!!!

I also became very addicted to substances and the "high" of constant verbal praise for my outward appearance. I am now (with God's strength) working on changing. I am currently sober - but constantly tempted. I am working out my salvation with fear and trembling!

Your testimony is so encouraging to me- a sister in the Lord that has been where I have! Praise God!!!!!!

Loving you in Christ!!!

 

[New Creation]

Hi New Creation! I am new to the boards and very happy to find you and your post! I too am a former "exotic dancer" that has come back to the Lord and left "the industry" about four years ago!!!!

I also became very addicted to substances and the "high" of constant verbal praise for my outward appearance. I am now (with God's strength) working on changing. I am currently sober - but constantly tempted. I am working out my salvation with fear and trembling!

Your testimony is so encouraging to me- a sister in the Lord that has been where I have! Praise God!!!!!!

Loving you in Christ!!!

Hey BlondieLashes! Welcome!!!!

Wow! I can't believe how quickly you found me after joining this board! Must be that somebody wants us to meet eh? Hmmmm.... now who could that be?.........

YOu are going to LOVE this place. Today is actually my second year anniversary of joining CF and I have gotten so much out of it. I joined as a 6 month old Christian and I have grown so much because of the other believers here and all the information and stories and encouragement!

I haven't really ever come across another woman who has been in the industry (on THIS board, that is) yet, so it is GREAT to have someone else to relate to.
You know, it's funny, I know I was addicted to substances and I know I have missed the constant praise about how I looked but I never really thought of it as an addiction until just now. I sometimes think I miss that the most.

Let's please keep in touch, I'm sure we can help each other!!!!

 

[BlondieLashes]

Praise God New Creation! I have a few online friends (not on this Forum) that are Christians that are former "dancers". There is a website called Lightdancers that is awesome (a friend of mine runs it)!

I know that I do miss that constant verbal praise that I am beautiful, wanted, etc. God is slowly teaching me to work on my inward appearance as that is what is pleasing to Him!

I am currently trying to decide whether or not to continue to support and write for a website (not Christian) that another friend of mine runs... I love her and I love the women still in the industry and want so badly to help them...I am just not sure that I am helping if I can't mention our Lord..... maybe in due time I can share with some of them...

Lots of healing still...and, yes, I believe God did want us to meet! I don't feel so alone anymore!!!!

Loving you in the Lord!

-BlondieLashes

 

[New Creation]

Lisanne! We have "spoken" in emails a few times and she sent me her devotional in the mail. I actually have a card from her sitting right in front of me- I got it out to look at it last night- haven't looked at it in over a year porbably- WEIRD EH????

I know what you mean about wanting to support the girls, I want to as well but am still not sure how I can do that.

I live in a very remote area now and there was only one club on the whole coast. A funny thing; I was hoping to start an outreach of sorts at this club and was going to begin after I got married (only 4 months ago). So on the way home from our honeymoon, my husband and I drove by the club and he exclaimed "Look! Burned to the ground!" And it had- the only club on the coast had disappeared overnight in a big cloud of smoke!

 

[SOTK]

Hi everyone,
I thought I would drop in and introduce myself. I have been in AA for my alcoholism for fifteen years. I have only been sober for a little less than four of those years. I also go to OA for eating disorders, so the 12 steps have been my support for a while.

My sobriety had been pretty good till lately. I have been finishing a Masters in Social Work, and have done internships in treatment facilities for two years, so drinking was not at all attractive to me. BUT,last week, I had not been to a meeting in a couple of weeks, and I got my stinking thinking going, and was seriously tempted to get drunk. It was so intense it scared me.

I just had to let you know that Satan is alive and well and ready to tempt me any time, any place. I have to keep my spiritual armor in good shape, or I am vulnerable to one of his arrows.

Trish

Howdy! I'm glad you dropped in! Trish, are you pretty involved in Church and/or a Christian type of recovery group?

There has been some discussion and good posts in this thread regarding quitting and staying quit as a Christian. I recommend browsing this thread.

In Christ,

SOTK

 

[SOTK]

Hi New Creation! I am new to the boards and very happy to find you and your post! I too am a former "exotic dancer" that has come back to the Lord and left "the industry" about four years ago!!!!

I also became very addicted to substances and the "high" of constant verbal praise for my outward appearance. I am now (with God's strength) working on changing. I am currently sober - but constantly tempted. I am working out my salvation with fear and trembling!

Your testimony is so encouraging to me- a sister in the Lord that has been where I have! Praise God!!!!!!

Loving you in Christ!!!

Working out our salvation with fear and trembling is always a good idea! I'm glad you're here, BlondieLashes!

In Christ,

SOTK

 

[BlondieLashes]

Thank you SOTK! I am so grateful to find this Forum online! I find that it is difficult to open up to others in person...but I can type my heart out and I need fellowship with other believers!

God Bless

 

[BlondieLashes]

Lisanne! We have "spoken" in emails a few times and she sent me her devotional in the mail. I actually have a card from her sitting right in front of me- I got it out to look at it last night- haven't looked at it in over a year porbably- WEIRD EH????

I know what you mean about wanting to support the girls, I want to as well but am still not sure how I can do that.

I live in a very remote area now and there was only one club on the whole coast. A funny thing; I was hoping to start an outreach of sorts at this club and was going to begin after I got married (only 4 months ago). So on the way home from our honeymoon, my husband and I drove by the club and he exclaimed "Look! Burned to the ground!" And it had- the only club on the coast had disappeared overnight in a big cloud of smoke!

New Creation-
There are no accidents in this life! How amazing that you know Lisanne as well. I consider her a close friend- we communicate mainly through e-mail as I live in So Cal and she is back East. Wow! I feel like you are a long lost friend!

It is definately a challenge to reach the girls and women in the industry...but as you know they are such precious women dear to our Lord!

 

[SOTK]

How are you all doing, my friends? I thought I would check in and see if anybody is struggling or having a hard time at present. Please feel free to discuss that here and ask for advice and especially prayer.

In Christ,

SOTK

 

[MarkChristopher]

Hello. I was surfing on the net and came across your site. I am glad that I did.

I have been an abuser of alcohol for most of my adult life. I am also the child of an alcoholic. Most commonly I am a binge drinker. I am not satisfied with just one drink. I looked in my waste can this morning...I knocked off close to a 12-pack of beer in less than an an evening. My body has been giving me signs that I need to stop. Worse still, my drinking has also affected my relationship with my wife. She desires nothing more than to have me permanently sober. She says that I am a different person when I have been drinking, and I am ashamed to say that she in correct.

I desire that as well, and I have tried to go cold turkey, but I am having trouble stopping and fighting the demons pushing me to have another drink. And when they do push me its for another large quantity of alcohol...usually in the form of beer.

I don't want to drink alcohol anymore.

I want to turn my situation completely over to God, but I am having trouble with this. So I thought I would post my situation on your forum in order to see how I can completely turn to God and ask for his help in beating alcohol once and for all.

I don't like the way I'm living and my poor 'ol body can't take much more of this bingeing.

I'm sure I can become permanently sober, but I need guidance...and God's help.

Thank you for your time. I am sure I will enjoy this site very much.

 

[SOTK]

Hello. I was surfing on the net and came across your site. I am glad that I did.

I have been an abuser of alcohol for most of my adult life. I am also the child of an alcoholic. Most commonly I am a binge drinker. I am not satisfied with just one drink. I looked in my waste can this morning...I knocked off close to a 12-pack of beer in less than an an evening. My body has been giving me signs that I need to stop. Worse still, my drinking has also affected my relationship with my wife. She desires nothing more than to have me permanently sober. She says that I am a different person when I have been drinking, and I am ashamed to say that she in correct.

I desire that as well, and I have tried to go cold turkey, but I am having trouble stopping and fighting the demons pushing me to have another drink. And when they do push me its for another large quantity of alcohol...usually in the form of beer.

I don't want to drink alcohol anymore.

I want to turn my situation completely over to God, but I am having trouble with this. So I thought I would post my situation on your forum in order to see how I can completely turn to God and ask for his help in beating alcohol once and for all.

I don't like the way I'm living and my poor 'ol body can't take much more of this bingeing.

I'm sure I can become permanently sober, but I need guidance...and God's help.

Thank you for your time. I am sure I will enjoy this site very much.

I've been there, my friend. First of all, if you don't mind, I'd like to ask you a few questions. This might help me and others to give the best advice we can.

How long have you been a Christian? How long have you been struggling with alcohol? Is your wife the only person in your life which has noticed your problem with alcohol? Have you ever been to treatment before? Have you ever tried Alcoholics Anonymous or Christian Recovery Groups? Also, if you go to church, have you talked with your Pastor about your problem?

I know that I have asked a lot of questions, but if you can answer most of them, it will help me to better understand some things about you so that I can give better advice or direction.

In the mean time, don't give up praying about this to God. One of the worst things an alcoholic can do is give into shame and stop talking with our Father. God wants to help you if you will truly listen to Him and accept His help.

I'll check back in on this thread tomorrow.

Welcome to CF and I'm glad you're here! I'll be praying for you, brother.

In Christ,

SOTK

 

[GabrielW]

If you truly have a desire to stop drinking you can do it friend. I've been sober since 11/02/01. But before much help can be offered answered to the questions asked above would be helpful, I'll check back too