- Mar 4, 2005
- 13,639
- 2,057
- Gender
- Female
- Faith
- Word of Faith
- Marital Status
- Single
Ohh how I wish I could tell someone so you all get it here.. lol.. I feel this is the only safe place I know..
I have met someone online who is a christian and so charming.. kind and caring.. but sigh.. he has the same name as my ex.. that throws me badly.. don't understand this.. another male friend I have online.. also has the same name but one letter is different.. the irony of it.. I think... is it a sign from GOD that maybe my ex might come back.. We are divorced.. sigh.. back in August.. two years almost since we separated before that..
This guy though.... he is on the other side of the world.. I met him through face book.. He is also single and without kids.. I have kids.. it really is an impossible thing and huge that he would even consider me at all.. which hurts my heart too not that he would but that I do not feel worth it.. but he is a good friend.. I mean so few really stop to ask how I am.. how are the kids.. few people keep in regular contact.. I have not really even opened up that much to him.. not really.. protecting my heart.. knowing this maybe an impossiblity because I am not financial at all.. disabled.. and I don't think he has much money either.. sigh.. but I do thank him for being a friend and for caring.. that I am thankful for.. and to GOD..
But in saying all that.. its nice to think someone is thinking of me nicely.. he is open that he cares and would accept me for all that I bring to the table.. but is careful to respect how I feel.. I may not be ready for more yet.. but he knows that.. I get so lonely though sometimes.. but not for company.. just someone that cares and some kind of hope for the future.. he listens and respects me.. I know this is very open to write all this and honest and probably too much info.. but I need to get it out somewhere..
All signs lead to him being in my life for a reason and that I don't need to be afraid GODS got my back.. and maybe anything that could happen is ages away if ever.. though I know GOD works in mysterious ways.. and that HE could make it happen..
I just waited along time for something that never happened.. and its hard to have faith for something.. anything anymore.. forgive me LORD.. HE knows.. I am trusting HIM.. but keeping all this inside is not me at all so it needs to come out.. please if you notice this.. just pray.. I haven't even had it in me much for being online and I am alway online usually..
God bless anyone who reads...
I have met someone online who is a christian and so charming.. kind and caring.. but sigh.. he has the same name as my ex.. that throws me badly.. don't understand this.. another male friend I have online.. also has the same name but one letter is different.. the irony of it.. I think... is it a sign from GOD that maybe my ex might come back.. We are divorced.. sigh.. back in August.. two years almost since we separated before that..
This guy though.... he is on the other side of the world.. I met him through face book.. He is also single and without kids.. I have kids.. it really is an impossible thing and huge that he would even consider me at all.. which hurts my heart too not that he would but that I do not feel worth it.. but he is a good friend.. I mean so few really stop to ask how I am.. how are the kids.. few people keep in regular contact.. I have not really even opened up that much to him.. not really.. protecting my heart.. knowing this maybe an impossiblity because I am not financial at all.. disabled.. and I don't think he has much money either.. sigh.. but I do thank him for being a friend and for caring.. that I am thankful for.. and to GOD..
But in saying all that.. its nice to think someone is thinking of me nicely.. he is open that he cares and would accept me for all that I bring to the table.. but is careful to respect how I feel.. I may not be ready for more yet.. but he knows that.. I get so lonely though sometimes.. but not for company.. just someone that cares and some kind of hope for the future.. he listens and respects me.. I know this is very open to write all this and honest and probably too much info.. but I need to get it out somewhere..
All signs lead to him being in my life for a reason and that I don't need to be afraid GODS got my back.. and maybe anything that could happen is ages away if ever.. though I know GOD works in mysterious ways.. and that HE could make it happen..
I just waited along time for something that never happened.. and its hard to have faith for something.. anything anymore.. forgive me LORD.. HE knows.. I am trusting HIM.. but keeping all this inside is not me at all so it needs to come out.. please if you notice this.. just pray.. I haven't even had it in me much for being online and I am alway online usually..
God bless anyone who reads...