A Deeper Walk or Judgmental?

[BuckeyeBaby]

Please study the lives of those who God used to change their nation, city or family.


You will find a common thread.


Consecration: Separated unto God.


Whether Jeremiah or John the Baptist, you will find these people had a strong personal relationship with the Lord.


Most people will not understand this, and will only be used to distract you from a strong relationship with the Lord.


I would start with making a prayer closet in your home.


Then dedicate it as a holy place where you meet with the Lord every day, to worship Him, pray and read the word.


The more you consecrate yourself unto Him, to be separated, set apart to seek Him, the clearer you will begin to hear His Voice within you.

He will lead you and guide you by His Spirit, into all truth.



However, when He, the Spirit of truth, has come, He will guide you into all truth; for He will not speak on His own authority, but whatever He hears He will speak; and He will tell you things to come.
John 16:13




JLB

Thank you for your advice and suggestions!

 

[FatalHeart]

My biggest quandary is this: How does one read the word, learn the word and see clearly the instructions and desires of the Lord for our life and then actively pursue the continual growth in "getting there" while still being surrounded by others who are either not making any progress, not desiring any progression, not bearing any fruit and/or simply do not believe in their "inner circle" of friends? How does one continue to grow in their faith while everyone else around them seems to stay the same? It seems we have "nothing" to talk about because they don't want to grow- or they don't "get" what I am saying as I share revelation's I may have received that day from reading or otherwise- and it leaves me feeling "empty" as if there is no one to talk too and subsequently I have become very "isolated" which as mentioned is very difficult for someone who is so outgoing such as myself.

I am in no way saying I am any better than anyone ( please don't misunderstand) but, I am struggling as this group of friends I have had for years continues to dwindle- and in earnest my only desire is for "more" -- I want more of God, a deeper walk, a more serious walk and one that includes other's who "get that"?

But, my friends say I just need to "love them" the way they are- I need to not be so judgemental, I need to accept it if they drink, party, curse, sleep with people, live with people without being married ( while Christians ) because they say they are learning just like everyone else- but, those patterns never really change so are they really learning? Even my more devout Christian friends are saying I need to just "accept" others more and stop being judgemental, they quote scriptures about Jesus befriending tax collectors, prostitutes and the like as a means to get me to see that I need to just "accept" everything and not let it affect me. And then there are those of course who don't believe in God at all.

They say these things to me ( above ) all the while telling me I am the "only" person in their life that is that "God" person for them-- they love that I listen to them, ( but, they don't want to listen to me) they love that I inspire them, edifying them etc. and that's wonderful that I can help them-I am grateful and maybe I am "missing it" isn't that the point after all- to help others? But, still, I struggle.

I find myself thinking and feeling that I want to be around people who are striving towards "the mark" in their life as I am- those that actually want to grow in their relationship with the Lord that don't want to stay complacent and "lukewarm" if you will - and finally I find myself wondering why that desire within me is so wrong and more importantly why I have to "lose everyone" in order to achieve it?

Okay, that's a whole lot of "questioning" I do realize- but, has anyone experienced this? It saddens my heart as I feel like everything that I have known is being stripped away and while there is a deep desire for me to keep going and keep moving forward trusting God - because we have come so far- I do find myself stepping back from time to time trying to "accept" or "force" myself to become complacent with what everyone is "asking" me to do while attempting to live out my own life but, I always feel like there is "more" for me and if I keep in this same holding pattern I won't ever find out what it is?

Thanks for listening new friends and any wise words of experience in this area would be appreciated- thanks!

Edit: It appears the entire top portion of this thread disappeared- sorry ( I'm new ) and it appears I posted this thread in two different forums- sorry again!

No, you aren't judgmental. We are supposed to separate from people that say they are Christians but are under specific sins un-repentantly: Corinthians 5:11. There are more verses, and I suggest you look them up. So, isolation is the first step. "Be holy." "Add to your faith, goodness." The second step is to start reading like a mad man and start listening to the Holy Spirit for whatever you do in life, building this relationship of talking to God about your feelings and thoughts and all the things you are and who He is, and seeing what He is willing to do to show you the way. "And to goodness, knowledge." Then, you take what you hear and you eliminate again from your life that which causes you to stumble out of those things and build an even greater habit of living according to what you have learned. "To knowledge, self control." Here is where you will be tested, because the tenacity of such character building will be tested for the rest of your life. "To self control, perseverance." This is where many lose it. They begin to be what they are supposed to be and forget that God is still teaching them and still leading them. They lose their kindness, understanding, and openness here, and start becoming rigid in self righteousness, mostly because where they started from wasn't genuine. That's where these people are attacking you. This is where discernment comes in. The fruit of the Spirit is discernible for those that actually know God, but for those that don't, the twist here becomes the place where most people fail.

It is your knowledge and your honesty in the first place that will allow you to hear the voice of God as to whether you are preforming according to His statutes. I have questioned, or did question, myself alot at this place trying to find out where the best way was, but, thankfully, I was very suspicious of everyone and it kept me from being mislead. The problem with human voices is they like to follow their own arrogant sentiments. The person who knows God no longer functions in a self pleasing way, not as a lifestyle (we do still do things we like, but it is no longer the only way of our hearts). But there are many people who take up religion or God or things about God that are only out to please themselves with the title. They are the pretenders, the actors. They profess things they don't know anything about and teach others the same thing because they are running from the actual God and it's more self affirming to at least look the part. Such people are only interested in how you make them feel or how you come off, rather than what you are actually saying and what you do. They worship themselves and dislike anyone who doesn't because the sin inside them hates the light. So, don't feel awful just because the majority doesn't like you. Remember, the majority is going to hell.

But in your quiet time with God, your reading of the scriptures, and when you are being honest in what the Lord is showing you, if you find conviction to change, change. That's what it means when it says, "And to perseverance, godliness." Knowing then who God is and using His character, His Spirit, and His guidance in what you do continually, as a reference in what you persevere in, you will know what love actually is and how to achieve it. You'll be able to see where you must sacrifice and have the strength to do it, and the humility that will make it done in a right way. Because of godliness, you will also work through laying down your dreams and desires to live the life God has for you, so that the words can be true, "To godliness, brotherly kindness." And this is what they accuse you of lacking because their definitions are wrong because their life is wrong because their teaching is wrong because the voice they are listening to is wrong because their desires are wrong.

Finally, "And to brotherly kindness, love." Love for God is obedience. Loving others is obeying God. The perfect love that drives out fear is not God loving you, it's you loving God; we can love perfectly because God loves perfectly and has put His Spirit inside us, and through following the Spirit, walking as Jesus did, we can make perfect moments that completely fulfill God's will for our lives, just like Adam was meant to (thank you, blood of Jesus). So don't mind people hating you because you do what God wants, or feeling judged if you are indeed speaking the truth in love. It's not your problem how people take you. It's your problem as to how obedient you are being and whether you are doing what the book says. "If I was still trying to please people I would no longer be a servant of Christ." Anyone who has the Spirit has wisdom because we are commanded to be wise and the Spirit does not bring us to sin. Because of this wisdom, and, as you grow in it, rest assured you will always or most often make the right choices in how you are trying to love the world. I have written all this assuming you are actually honest. Remember, "They hated me without reason."

 

[BuckeyeBaby]

Just seek God and God will probably replace them with people walking with you. Or they may begin walking. It may sound harsh, but to walk you have to leave what is behind you there unless it comes with you.

Thank you for your advice.

 

[marineimaging]

Thank you for your advice- much to think and pray about here.

I do pray that you not only find your answer, but accept it with trust and faith that the Lord will fill your life with new friends who are not going to ask you to stand behind their sins, but they will walk the walk of Jesus Christ with you and do it by your side. And I have a feeling that there will be a few of your old friends who will eventually show up and walk with you guys as well.

 

[BuckeyeBaby]

No, you aren't judgmental. We are supposed to separate from people that say they are Christians but are under specific sins un-repentantly: Corinthians 5:11. There are more verses, and I suggest you look them up. So, isolation is the first step. "Be holy." "Add to your faith, goodness." The second step is to start reading like a mad man and start listening to the Holy Spirit for whatever you do in life, building this relationship of talking to God about your feelings and thoughts and all the things you are and who He is, and seeing what He is willing to do to show you the way. "And to goodness, knowledge." Then, you take what you hear and you eliminate again from your life that which causes you to stumble out of those things and build an even greater habit of living according to what you have learned. "To knowledge, self control." Here is where you will be tested, because the tenacity of such character building will be tested for the rest of your life. "To self control, perseverance." This is where many lose it. They begin to be what they are supposed to be and forget that God is still teaching them and still leading them. They lose their kindness, understanding, and openness here, and start becoming rigid in self righteousness, mostly because where they started from wasn't genuine. That's where these people are attacking you. This is where discernment comes in. The fruit of the Spirit is discernible for those that actually know God, but for those that don't, the twist here becomes the place where most people fail.

It is your knowledge and your honesty in the first place that will allow you to hear the voice of God as to whether you are preforming according to His statutes. I have questioned, or did question, myself alot at this place trying to find out where the best way was, but, thankfully, I was very suspicious of everyone and it kept me from being mislead. The problem with human voices is they like to follow their own arrogant sentiments. The person who knows God no longer functions in a self pleasing way, not as a lifestyle (we do still do things we like, but it is no longer the only way of our hearts). But there are many people who take up religion or God or things about God that are only out to please themselves with the title. They are the pretenders, the actors. They profess things they don't know anything about and teach others the same thing because they are running from the actual God and it's more self affirming to at least look the part. Such people are only interested in how you make them feel or how you come off, rather than what you are actually saying and what you do. They worship themselves and dislike anyone who doesn't because the sin inside them hates the light. So, don't feel awful just because the majority doesn't like you. Remember, the majority is going to hell.

But in your quiet time with God, your reading of the scriptures, and when you are being honest in what the Lord is showing you, if you find conviction to change, change. That's what it means when it says, "And to perseverance, godliness." Knowing then who God is and using His character, His Spirit, and His guidance in what you do continually, as a reference in what you persevere in, you will know what love actually is and how to achieve it. You'll be able to see where you must sacrifice and have the strength to do it, and the humility that will make it done in a right way. Because of godliness, you will also work through laying down your dreams and desires to live the life God has for you, so that the words can be true, "To godliness, brotherly kindness." And this is what they accuse you of lacking because their definitions are wrong because their life is wrong because their teaching is wrong because the voice they are listening to is wrong because their desires are wrong.

Finally, "And to brotherly kindness, love." Love for God is obedience. Loving others is obeying God. The perfect love that drives out fear is not God loving you, it's you loving God; we can love perfectly because God loves perfectly and has put His Spirit inside us, and through following the Spirit, walking as Jesus did, we can make perfect moments that completely fulfill God's will for our lives, just like Adam was meant to (thank you, blood of Jesus). So don't mind people hating you because you do what God wants, or feeling judged if you are indeed speaking the truth in love. It's not your problem how people take you. It's your problem as to how obedient you are being and whether you are doing what the book says. "If I was still trying to please people I would no longer be a servant of Christ." Anyone who has the Spirit has wisdom because we are commanded to be wise and the Spirit does not bring us to sin. Because of this wisdom, and, as you grow in it, rest assured you will always or most often make the right choices in how you are trying to love the world. I have written all this assuming you are actually honest. Remember, "They hated me without reason."

Thank you for your advice here- I understand and again thank you for taking the time write this - much to pray and consider.

 

[BuckeyeBaby]

I do pray that you not only find your answer, but accept it with trust and faith that the Lord will fill your life with new friends who are not going to ask you to stand behind their sins, but they will walk the walk of Jesus Christ with you and do it by your side. And I have a feeling that there will be a few of your old friends who will eventually show up and walk with you guys as well.

Thank you so much. I am struggling through this- I have this inner "sense" and feel/hear the words are you "all in" and in earnest I am struggling with what that really means...

 

[SteveIndy]

My biggest quandary is this: How does one read the word, learn the word and see clearly the instructions and desires of the Lord for our life and then actively pursue the continual growth in "getting there" while still being surrounded by others who are either not making any progress, not desiring any progression, not bearing any fruit and/or simply do not believe in their "inner circle" of friends? How does one continue to grow in their faith while everyone else around them seems to stay the same? It seems we have "nothing" to talk about because they don't want to grow- or they don't "get" what I am saying as I share revelation's I may have received that day from reading or otherwise- and it leaves me feeling "empty" as if there is no one to talk too and subsequently I have become very "isolated" which as mentioned is very difficult for someone who is so outgoing such as myself.

I am in no way saying I am any better than anyone ( please don't misunderstand) but, I am struggling as this group of friends I have had for years continues to dwindle- and in earnest my only desire is for "more" -- I want more of God, a deeper walk, a more serious walk and one that includes other's who "get that"?

But, my friends say I just need to "love them" the way they are- I need to not be so judgemental, I need to accept it if they drink, party, curse, sleep with people, live with people without being married ( while Christians ) because they say they are learning just like everyone else- but, those patterns never really change so are they really learning? Even my more devout Christian friends are saying I need to just "accept" others more and stop being judgemental, they quote scriptures about Jesus befriending tax collectors, prostitutes and the like as a means to get me to see that I need to just "accept" everything and not let it affect me. And then there are those of course who don't believe in God at all.

They say these things to me ( above ) all the while telling me I am the "only" person in their life that is that "God" person for them-- they love that I listen to them, ( but, they don't want to listen to me) they love that I inspire them, edifying them etc. and that's wonderful that I can help them-I am grateful and maybe I am "missing it" isn't that the point after all- to help others? But, still, I struggle.

I find myself thinking and feeling that I want to be around people who are striving towards "the mark" in their life as I am- those that actually want to grow in their relationship with the Lord that don't want to stay complacent and "lukewarm" if you will - and finally I find myself wondering why that desire within me is so wrong and more importantly why I have to "lose everyone" in order to achieve it?

Okay, that's a whole lot of "questioning" I do realize- but, has anyone experienced this? It saddens my heart as I feel like everything that I have known is being stripped away and while there is a deep desire for me to keep going and keep moving forward trusting God - because we have come so far- I do find myself stepping back from time to time trying to "accept" or "force" myself to become complacent with what everyone is "asking" me to do while attempting to live out my own life but, I always feel like there is "more" for me and if I keep in this same holding pattern I won't ever find out what it is?

Thanks for listening new friends and any wise words of experience in this area would be appreciated- thanks!

Edit: It appears the entire top portion of this thread disappeared- sorry ( I'm new ) and it appears I posted this thread in two different forums- sorry again!

Your dilemma is not new. The short answer to your problem is to separate yourself from unbelievers. If the tree is dead or there is no fruit then they are un-saved, un-regenerated, un-Christian, and un-responsive, which means there is no life in them; they must be treated as un-believers. If you continue to fellowship with them you will eventually become like them. Most Christians today are Christian in name only, they neither read their Bibles, walk as Jesus walked, care about the poor, or love their enemies. The religion of most Christians is Patriotism and Nationalism; they care more about politics and all the latest trash coming out of Washington than the Lamb of God. These “Christians” stock-pile weapons, ammunition, and food and think Jesus would applaud their actions.

Remember the words of the Savior, “Very few will be able to enter through the strait gate but many will walk in the broad-way.” Most modern Christians are living an illusion created by their own inflated egos of what they want Christianity to be. If they do not want to join with you in conversation about truth then don’t push the matter, don’t go to their home and don’t sit down to a meal with them; really, it is that serious. Historically, Christians had few friends. Pursue truth and let God handle finding you your friends.

Every instance where Jesus spoke with unbelievers it was for the purpose of speaking truth into their lives, it was not to beg their friendship or to be buddies. Tell your existing circle of friends the truth and you will find out soon enough what they think of you and your Jesus. Yes, love them, but do not follow them in their madness. The truth is they know nothing about love. You, love the ignorant, you, love the poor, you, preach the truth, and you sacrifice your life for those who despise your way of life, and that sacrificial life will be a loudspeaker proclaiming the Gospel from the rooftops.

 

[BuckeyeBaby]

The advice of your friends suggesting that you be less judgmental and emulate Jesus accepting all kinds of people is worth heeding. Pharisaism is always a hazard of a religious life.

When people say they are struggling, but yet you have a desire to be around "real Christians", that is indeed judgmentalism. A nonjudgmental person would simply give the benefit of the doubt in those circumstances. That doesn't mean you have to participate in activities that are objectionable, but it does mean that criticizing people is bound to alienate them. If your criticism creates a stumbling block to the Gospel, that is a serious offense and should not be treated lightly.

Thank you for your advice.

 

[BuckeyeBaby]

Your dilemma is not new. The short answer to your problem is to separate yourself from unbelievers. If the tree is dead or there is no fruit then they are un-saved, un-regenerated, un-Christian, and un-responsive, which means there is no life in them; they must be treated as un-believers. If you continue to fellowship with them you will eventually become like them. Most Christians today are Christian in name only, they neither read their Bibles, walk as Jesus walked, care about the poor, or love their enemies. The religion of most Christians is Patriotism and Nationalism; they care more about politics and all the latest trash coming out of Washington than the Lamb of God. These “Christians” stock-pile weapons, ammunition, and food and think Jesus would applaud their actions.

Remember the words of the Savior, “Very few will be able to enter through the strait gate but many will walk in the broad-way.” Most modern Christians are living an illusion created by their own inflated egos of what they want Christianity to be. If they do not want to join with you in conversation about truth then don’t push the matter, don’t go to their home and don’t sit down to a meal with them; really, it is that serious. Historically, Christians had few friends. Pursue truth and let God handle finding you your friends.

Every instance where Jesus spoke with unbelievers it was for the purpose of speaking truth into their lives, it was not to beg their friendship or to be buddies. Tell your existing circle of friends the truth and you will find out soon enough what they think of you and your Jesus. Yes, love them, but do not follow them in their madness. The truth is they know nothing about love. You, love the ignorant, you, love the poor, you, preach the truth, and you sacrifice your life for those who despise your way of life, and that sacrificial life will be a loudspeaker proclaiming the Gospel from the rooftops.

Thank you for your advice.

 

[BradB]

My biggest quandary is this: How does one read the word, learn the word and see clearly the instructions and desires of the Lord for our life and then actively pursue the continual growth in "getting there" while still being surrounded by others who are either not making any progress, not desiring any progression, not bearing any fruit and/or simply do not believe in their "inner circle" of friends? How does one continue to grow in their faith while everyone else around them seems to stay the same? It seems we have "nothing" to talk about because they don't want to grow- or they don't "get" what I am saying as I share revelation's I may have received that day from reading or otherwise- and it leaves me feeling "empty" as if there is no one to talk too and subsequently I have become very "isolated" which as mentioned is very difficult for someone who is so outgoing such as myself.

I am in no way saying I am any better than anyone ( please don't misunderstand) but, I am struggling as this group of friends I have had for years continues to dwindle- and in earnest my only desire is for "more" -- I want more of God, a deeper walk, a more serious walk and one that includes other's who "get that"?

But, my friends say I just need to "love them" the way they are- I need to not be so judgemental, I need to accept it if they drink, party, curse, sleep with people, live with people without being married ( while Christians ) because they say they are learning just like everyone else- but, those patterns never really change so are they really learning? Even my more devout Christian friends are saying I need to just "accept" others more and stop being judgemental, they quote scriptures about Jesus befriending tax collectors, prostitutes and the like as a means to get me to see that I need to just "accept" everything and not let it affect me. And then there are those of course who don't believe in God at all.

They say these things to me ( above ) all the while telling me I am the "only" person in their life that is that "God" person for them-- they love that I listen to them, ( but, they don't want to listen to me) they love that I inspire them, edifying them etc. and that's wonderful that I can help them-I am grateful and maybe I am "missing it" isn't that the point after all- to help others? But, still, I struggle.

I find myself thinking and feeling that I want to be around people who are striving towards "the mark" in their life as I am- those that actually want to grow in their relationship with the Lord that don't want to stay complacent and "lukewarm" if you will - and finally I find myself wondering why that desire within me is so wrong and more importantly why I have to "lose everyone" in order to achieve it?

Okay, that's a whole lot of "questioning" I do realize- but, has anyone experienced this? It saddens my heart as I feel like everything that I have known is being stripped away and while there is a deep desire for me to keep going and keep moving forward trusting God - because we have come so far- I do find myself stepping back from time to time trying to "accept" or "force" myself to become complacent with what everyone is "asking" me to do while attempting to live out my own life but, I always feel like there is "more" for me and if I keep in this same holding pattern I won't ever find out what it is?

Thanks for listening new friends and any wise words of experience in this area would be appreciated- thanks!

Edit: It appears the entire top portion of this thread disappeared- sorry ( I'm new ) and it appears I posted this thread in two different forums- sorry again!

When I became a Christian I didn't end a single friendship that I had had in the world. What happened is that as I got on fire my so called friends either caught fire too or scurried for the darkness. I recall one former drinking buddy actually standing up in my living room and saying he was shaking and couldn't stand being in my presence. He literally ran out of my house and I never saw him again. My wife even left me saying she didn't like the "new me." What I am saying is you go ahead and run after God with all your heart soul mind and strength. Don't try and tone it down for anyone. I've found that for every friend I lost God drew in new friends into my life. People who love the Light are drawn in by the light they see shining forth in you. Almost all of my current friends now I met while out street preaching and they were people of like passion. When someone invites me to go some place that might be questionable I simply ask "Is it okay if I bring Jesus with me?" They kinda stop asking you to go to the club with them when all you want to do there is tell people about Jesus.

 

[melder.ar]

Hey BuckEyeBaby! I see you've gotten a lot of replies and that's awesome! But I figure I'd chime in since this is something I've definitely struggled with since being in college for the past couple years.
I think you should definitely talk to your friends who you don't feel are supporting or listening to you. Not in a condescending way, but just talking with them and tell them that you feel like they're sometimes not willing to support or listen to you in the ways you need. I think that's the first step if you want to remain friends with them. But, I also don't think it's unusual that you feel like you're growing aaway from them since you do show and act on that desire to grow closer to the Lord. There's nothing wrong with growing apart, it will happen and happen again.
I think also, regardless of whether you stay with them or part ways, you need to find a Christian community who you can be in fellowship with. Find someone to pour into you like a mentor, someone willing to disciple you and help you grow more in your faith; someone older and who has more experience in life. Also find people (maybe through the same outlet) who are your peers that are also chasing after God. If you don't have a church, find one! It can be a great community to have and to also meet both devout peers and a mentor.
I hope this was helpful!! It's just stuff that has really helped me to know while I'm starting my own life in college. I'd love to hear from you and may God bless you and guide you!

 

[younglite]

I love hearing your heart, Buckeye Baby. Your struggle is a healthy one for anyone wanting to follow Jesus with all that they are.

The early church would not recognize people living in known sin as true disciples of Christ. This is different from the one who struggles with sin, yet is committed to casting it aside for Christ. If you feel so led to warn your "Christians" friends about their excuse that Jesus hung out with sinners: take them to Mark 2:15. Jesus didn't hang out with sinners who wanted to keep sinning. These "sinners" were those who decided to follow Him, not those who sang His praises at church and lived like the world otherwise. His message was one of repentance and loving obedience.

I applaud your endurance. Keep your determination to strive for Him! "He who endures to the end shall be saved." ~Jesus

 

[Gwen-is-new!]

Thank you for your advice!

Welcome to the forum, and please stay around! I have no doubt you have a lot to contribute!

 

[drich0150]

Put yourself to work at a pace that challenges you, whether it be in the church at work or even at home, those who can keep up you keep those who can not you cut loose. you have an obligation to love worship God with all he has given you. if he has given you 3 talents then you need to put all three talents to work even if your friends are maxed out at one each. find those also working with 3 or more and work with them.

 

[Blade]

What did our brother Paul Peter James.. John etc do? See the good in them 1st.. pray for them. FOR ME the second I think know I am better (not the best word sorry) I stop.. look at myself.. we all grow differently. What we SEE on the outside of others may not be what is really there.. its the HEART the Father sees..

 

[dqhall]

Matthew 5:41 Whoever compels you to go one mile, go with him two.

Roman soldiers had the right to press a person to carry their gear a mile. The Romans were hated by the Jews of Jesus' day. The taxes were high, the Romans had idols, myths, sexual immorality, and did not believe in the God of Israel. Jesus taught unconditional love of a sinner. Jesus did not teach his disciples to rise up against their oppressor. In 66 AD the Jews rose up against Rome. By the end of 70 AD Jerusalem residents were dead or enslaved worse than when they had the high taxes and oppression.

 

[Dr Bruce Atkinson]

My biggest quandary is this: How does one read the word, learn the word and see clearly the instructions and desires of the Lord for our life and then actively pursue the continual growth in "getting there" while still being surrounded by others who are either not making any progress, not desiring any progression, not bearing any fruit and/or simply do not believe in their "inner circle" of friends? How does one continue to grow in their faith while everyone else around them seems to stay the same? It seems we have "nothing" to talk about because they don't want to grow- or they don't "get" what I am saying as I share revelation's I may have received that day from reading or otherwise- and it leaves me feeling "empty" as if there is no one to talk too and subsequently I have become very "isolated" which as mentioned is very difficult for someone who is so outgoing such as myself.

I am in no way saying I am any better than anyone ( please don't misunderstand) but, I am struggling as this group of friends I have had for years continues to dwindle- and in earnest my only desire is for "more" -- I want more of God, a deeper walk, a more serious walk and one that includes other's who "get that"?

But, my friends say I just need to "love them" the way they are- I need to not be so judgemental, I need to accept it if they drink, party, curse, sleep with people, live with people without being married ( while Christians ) because they say they are learning just like everyone else- but, those patterns never really change so are they really learning? Even my more devout Christian friends are saying I need to just "accept" others more and stop being judgemental, they quote scriptures about Jesus befriending tax collectors, prostitutes and the like as a means to get me to see that I need to just "accept" everything and not let it affect me. And then there are those of course who don't believe in God at all.

They say these things to me ( above ) all the while telling me I am the "only" person in their life that is that "God" person for them-- they love that I listen to them, ( but, they don't want to listen to me) they love that I inspire them, edifying them etc. and that's wonderful that I can help them-I am grateful and maybe I am "missing it" isn't that the point after all- to help others? But, still, I struggle.

I find myself thinking and feeling that I want to be around people who are striving towards "the mark" in their life as I am- those that actually want to grow in their relationship with the Lord that don't want to stay complacent and "lukewarm" if you will - and finally I find myself wondering why that desire within me is so wrong and more importantly why I have to "lose everyone" in order to achieve it?

Okay, that's a whole lot of "questioning" I do realize- but, has anyone experienced this? It saddens my heart as I feel like everything that I have known is being stripped away and while there is a deep desire for me to keep going and keep moving forward trusting God - because we have come so far- I do find myself stepping back from time to time trying to "accept" or "force" myself to become complacent with what everyone is "asking" me to do while attempting to live out my own life but, I always feel like there is "more" for me and if I keep in this same holding pattern I won't ever find out what it is?

Thanks for listening new friends and any wise words of experience in this area would be appreciated- thanks!

Edit: It appears the entire top portion of this thread disappeared- sorry ( I'm new ) and it appears I posted this thread in two different forums- sorry again!

This is not an unusual difficulty.
First, your growth is really between you and the Lord. Study the scriptures (and commentaries). Pray continually. Do not depend on everyone else. They are "all over the map" in terms of spiritual maturity.
Second, do keep looking for mature Christians to help mentor you. Look for a church which focuses on the the essentials of the gospel and discipleship.

Bottom line: God has a plan for you and your growth. Be patient and persevering. God's timing is not ours. God will provide the opportunities at the right time. He is in charge of your growth and will do it.

 

[Toro]

I honestly think what you may be going through is change.
We can not be who we once were... we can not be old wineskins with new wine.

There will be parts of our lives that get stripped away over time, even far into our walk with Christ. If He convicts us to put it down (whether "it" is a person, thing, habit, hobby... etc) we must obey.

We are to trust in Him that which He allows to be removed from us is removed for our growth so we do not become stagnant.

As for being frustrated that others wont grow. We are not even responsible for our own growth, IF we could take credit for our growth and changes then we as men(or women) would have reason to boast and therefore our boasting would be for our glory.

Instead our changes are brought about by Christ and in Christ alone. For there is NOTHING good in ANY of us. We are all weak and sinful in our nature given to us all through Adam.

We shouldnt compare our light to another's light. The light we have is what God has given to us.

Instead, look at what one DOES with the light th hey have been given.

For example... I have heard it put this way. I do not agree with Catholicism, BUT while I believe God has given me light and truth to see where I HIGHLY disagree with Catholics..... I can not disagree that someone like Mother Teresa was far more kind, far more loving than I have been, even now that I try to give myself completely to Jesus.... I am still far less loving and compassionate to my brother and sister.

So IF they have 1 talent and have 2 t as lents... rejoice that brother or sister has produced for the Lord r as ther than bury it and produce nothing.

We are to warn, but there are plenty of judges in this world... we can reach a brother or sister much more effectively by reflecting the light if Christ. (Being humble, being in prayer and abiding in Him more than we can by saying "You have a speck in your eye".

The more we get out of Gods way with our free will, the more His light will shine through us... the more those around us will take notice.

We cant save ourselves, so we are even more helpless in saving others.... but we CAN get out of Gods way so He can use us to save or cause growth in others by making sure we agree with His will instead of always choosing our own free will.

 

[BuckeyeBaby]

The advice of your friends suggesting that you be less judgmental and emulate Jesus accepting all kinds of people is worth heeding. Pharisaism is always a hazard of a religious life.

When people say they are struggling, but yet you have a desire to be around "real Christians", that is indeed judgmentalism. A nonjudgmental person would simply give the benefit of the doubt in those circumstances. That doesn't mean you have to participate in activities that are objectionable, but it does mean that criticizing people is bound to alienate them. If your criticism creates a stumbling block to the Gospel, that is a serious offense and should not be treated lightly.

Thank you for your advice!

 

[BuckeyeBaby]

This is not an unusual difficulty.
First, your growth is really between you and the Lord. Study the scriptures (and commentaries). Pray continually. Do not depend on everyone else. They are "all over the map" in terms of spiritual maturity.
Second, do keep looking for mature Christians to help mentor you. Look for a church which focuses on the the essentials of the gospel and discipleship.

Bottom line: God has a plan for you and your growth. Be patient and persevering. God's timing is not ours. God will provide the opportunities at the right time. He is in charge of your growth and will do it.

Thank you for your advice!