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Does spiritual growth increase emotional intelligence?

Michie

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In 1995, psychologist and science journalist Daniel Goleman "published a book introducing most of the world to the nascent concept of emotional intelligence.” And 30 years later, these 5 components remain vitally important:

1. Self-awareness
2. Self-regulation
3. Motivation
4. Empathy
5. Social skills

Emotional intelligence is obviously crucial for anyone who wants success in their marriage, family, career, and friendships. But is there an overlap with your spiritual life? In other words, does spiritual growth increase emotional intelligence?

Continued below.
 
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Gregory Thompson

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Christian spiritual growth involves psychological work regarding personal sins and out of control desires. The exercise of "taking thoughts captive" results in more "emotional intelligence." However, since this emotional intelligence results in an awareness of "sin" and it's role in the creation as it is now ... it won't at all conform to the worldly models found in self help literature.

Christian spiritual growth also involves a form of spiritual warfare. Since Christians are aware of the existence of demons, and God, and their worldly contemporaries are not .. this further increases the chasm of perception.
 
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sunshine_

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I definitely think so!

I just finished reading Daniel Keyes' 'Flowers for Algernon', which for anyone that doesn't know, is a novel about a very unintelligent person with an IQ of 70 being given an experimental medical treatment that allows him to learn things at an extremely fast rate with good retention, so that after 3 months he finds himself with an IQ of 190 and he's the smartest man in the world. The novel explores a lot of things, but one of the main concepts was how despite being very smart, he completely lacked emotional intelligence, because emotional intelligence is developed by personal life experiences, not through books. The result was that despite being knowledgeable on all things and having learnt so much in 3 months that would take most people a lifetime, he was completely lonely with no friends and an inability to further his relationship with one of the women in his life. It got me thinking about how a person's connection with their faith and their actions over the course of their lifetime in accordance with that faith will provide much more for their emotional intelligence than any book could. You can't just 'get' emotional intelligence in the span of a few months, it's an ongoing process that literally takes a lifetime. In that sense, I think the lessons someone can learn from their faith would definitely help with their emotional intelligence.
 
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Michie

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Christian spiritual growth involves psychological work regarding personal sins and out of control desires. The exercise of "taking thoughts captive" results in more "emotional intelligence." However, since this emotional intelligence results in an awareness of "sin" and it's role in the creation as it is now ... it won't at all conform to the worldly models found in self help literature.

Christian spiritual growth also involves a form of spiritual warfare. Since Christians are aware of the existence of demons, and God, and their worldly contemporaries are not .. this further increases the chasm of perception.
Self help literature as well as a lot of Christian self help literature is a lot of murky nonsense. It takes a lot of discernment. While worldly self help is a lot of the latest fads, I find a lot Christian self help lit the same but under a thin guise of carefully selected Scripture verses. Don’t get me wrong, there are gems out there but they seem to be few and far between. A lot depends on the spiritual state of the reader as far as what hits and misses.
 
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Akita Suggagaki

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Like many things it is a tool.
1. Self-awareness
2. Self-regulation
3. Motivation
4. Empathy
5. Social skills

Can be aspects of spiritual growth. Faith is the greater context of all these.
 
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Akita Suggagaki

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You can't just 'get' emotional intelligence in the span of a few months, it's an ongoing process that literally takes a lifetime. In that sense, I think the lessons someone can learn from their faith would definitely help with their emotional intelligence.
like conversion itself. There may be an initial "rebirth" but the process is on going and lasts a lifetime.
I suppose even an atheist can be emotionally intelligent. But can a saint lack it? I suppose we are all on a spectrum of it.
 
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stevevw

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I think delayed gratification is strongly associated with emotional intelligence during development. Its a strange and even outdated idea in todays world of instant gratification or even pre empted gratification in wanting emotional comfort without the sacrifice.

I am wondering if delayed gratification is linked to self sacrifice in Christ which I would say involved a greater capacity to not only delay comfort and feelings but reside in suffering for a greater good.

I would say that is venturing into stoism such as the ancient Monks and into a higher level of transcendence beyond the emotional level.
 
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Gregory Thompson

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Self help literature as well as a lot of Christian self help literature is a lot of murky nonsense. It takes a lot of discernment. While worldly self help is a lot of the latest fads, I find a lot Christian self help lit the same but under a thin guise of carefully selected Scripture verses. Don’t get me wrong, there are gems out there but they seem to be few and far between. A lot depends on the spiritual state of the reader as far as what hits and misses.
A lot of the books that are popular tend to "balloon" topics instead of writing in depth. If you are well studied however, finding those gems is easier since the Holy Spirit can bring God things back to remembrance at the most unexpected of times.
 
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JustaPewFiller

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My vote is that it can, and it likely should, but it doesn't always.

Maybe it depends on the definition of "spiritual growth" ?

In my time, I've met a few Christians who by most accounts would be labeled "good Christians". They knew the Bible backwards and forwards, they were in church most every time the doors opened, they didn't listen to any secular music or watch secular movies or tv (except for the news). Didn't drink, didn't smoke, etc.. and had lived this life style for years.

But let something not go their way or someone do something they do not like and .. oh wow. Katie bar the door! Most of those 5 hallmarks of emotional intelligence go out the window.

Please note, I said "a few". Thankfully not most. For those few somehow all the time in church didn't bring about a huge amount of emotional intelligence.
 
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FireDragon76

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Like many things it is a tool.
1. Self-awareness
2. Self-regulation
3. Motivation
4. Empathy
5. Social skills

Can be aspects of spiritual growth. Faith is the greater context of all these.

Yes, without faith it is impossible to have a great many, if not all of these, in abundance. That's not just a pious platitutde, it's a lived experiential reality. Cynicism and emotional trauma can damage our ability to grow and flourish as human beings, and can be a source of injury to faith.

Also, many people, especially Christians, neglect their own embodied experience of the world, which is foundational to being a highly integrated person. This is especially important in the modern world, where many people live in their heads. Dance, yoga, tai chi, meditation, playing a music instrument, exercise, those can all be very helpful for getting in touch with the body's wisdom.
 
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Akita Suggagaki

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fhansen

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In 1995, psychologist and science journalist Daniel Goleman "published a book introducing most of the world to the nascent concept of emotional intelligence.” And 30 years later, these 5 components remain vitally important:

1. Self-awareness
2. Self-regulation
3. Motivation
4. Empathy
5. Social skills

Emotional intelligence is obviously crucial for anyone who wants success in their marriage, family, career, and friendships. But is there an overlap with your spiritual life? In other words, does spiritual growth increase emotional intelligence?

Continued below.
Our faith gives me both the reason and the ability to improve in self-control as well as empathy. Soundness of mind is another benefit.
 
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Akita Suggagaki

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Our faith gives me both the reason and the ability to improve in self-control as well as empathy. Soundness of mind is another benefit.
1. Self-awareness would be needed for 2. Self-regulation (self control).

3. Motivation can certainly come from our faith.

4. Empathy, not to be confused with sympathy and pity. It takes vulnerability.

5. Social skills, you know, some people seem to be born with them or learn them easily. Others, hardly at all. I think this is where conversion makes the biggest impact, changing our whole way of being in the world. Often the most important social skill is simply listening well.
 
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com7fy8

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Does spiritual growth increase emotional intelligence?
If by spiritual growth we mean to grow to become and to love like Jesus . . . this will affect our emotions. And yes it is emotionally intelligent to live only in Jesus love and the emotions of Jesus in us.

Jesus says >

"'Take My yoke upon you and learn from Me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls.'" (Matthew 11:29)

So, Jesus is gentle and humble in His love with His love's emotions. And while we live in Jesus and His love, then, we have gentle and humble emotions. I would say this is intelligent . . . so submit to Jesus so we share with Him, like this.

And part of getting with Jesus and growing in Jesus is how we reject emotions which are not gentle and humble in God's way of loving >

"Let all bitterness, wrath, anger, clamor, and evil speaking be put away from you, with all malice." (Ephesians 4:31)

God is almighty to get rid of any evil emotions. We can not do this, by our own understanding and strength; but we depend on God to do this with us. And then He gets us into His love and His way of relating, instead >

"And be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God in Christ forgave you." (Ephesians 4:32)

I offer how this says to "be" . . . kind . . . not to "act", but this is how to be. This means how our character becomes kind in God's love, so that wrong emotions can not get the better of us. We grow in Jesus with His natural immunity against sin-sick emotional stuff ! ! !

So, this is not only a matter of what humans might call "intelligence". But in the character of Christ in us, this character has God working in us to reject and get rid of wrong emotions and drives, with almighty immunity of God in us making this work so well. If the emotions are unkind to us, they are not God and need to be rejected.

So, if emotional intelligence means to submit to God and how He gets rid of wrong emotions and corrects our character so we are submissive to Him in His love and gentle and humble emotions of love . . . yes, spiritual growth does increase this.

"Therefore submit to God. Resist the devil and he will flee from you." (James 4:7)

"Be sober, be vigilant, because your adversary the devil walks about like a roaring lion, seeking whom he may devour." (1 Peter 5:8)

We can be devoured by unforgiveness, anger, worry, and lusts. But God is able to make us "sober" in His love with His immunity almighty against these cruel and sin-sick things. Also, we have >

"Do all things without complaining and disputing," (Philippians 2:14)

People and our relationships can be devoured by arguing and complaining. And, again, God is the One who is almighty and sensible and swift enough to detect and reject what in us would start to get us to argue or complain. Plus, I have found to my delight, God can easily stop me right in the middle of my arguing and self-righteous complaining against other people. And He can restore me into sweet and sensitive sharing with Him in His peace . . . where we have our Creator's own creativity for how to love and relate with any person, at all. God commands us to submit to Him in the ruling of His peace in our hearts >

"And let the peace of God rule in your hearts, to which also you were called in one body; and be thankful." (Colossians 3:15)

Here we have our Father's own creativity, in His own peace ruling :)
 
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