What's on your mind?

I am totally worn out.

DragonFox91 said:

I've definitely thought in the past we should identify as something else. I think that's a big reason in the past people would identify by their denomination, people saw Christian was just too broad a term. We don't really identify ourselves by a denomination as much anymore in some part b/c identifying ourselves by a denomination feels wrong to us, but we also feel Christian is just too broad a term, so we are stuck without a name.

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I’ve developed the ability to talk about the Lord and biblical principles without using any labels. Sometimes it’s necessary to meet a person where they are or find common denominators in shared interests. I’m less concerned about the word and more focused on the light. If the latter is lacking it doesn’t matter what I call myself. Have I made a difference today? Is someone bettered by my presence? Was I His hands and feet? Those are the questions that keep me accountable and draw others to Christ. Living the word is more important.

It increasingly feels like we’re living in Sodom and Gomorrah and I’m growing tired of the proliferation of sex and debauchery in our culture. Barely there attire is having its moment before the congregation and men are speaking out. Gym attire is on the hot seat and many are complaining. Why is it necessary to be sexy while exercising with no concern for others? Most of the pieces are too sheer, too tight or leave nothing to the imagination.

But they didn’t stop there. A recent incident at Disney World brought additional ire. Women were scantily clad in bubble skirts that didn’t cover their bottom. It looks like a micro mini skirt in the front and when she walks away the back is exposed. How did we get here? What compels someone to dress like that in a setting with children and families? It’s indecent.

I wish that was it but it’s not. We have mesh dresses that look like fishing nets and under clothes are optional. We’re no longer wearing pants and opting for pantyhose in their place with a onesie top that looks like a swimsuit. And if this wasn’t shameful enough, Kim Kardashian introduced a nipple bra through her Skims line. We’re finding new lows.

Someone likened this behavior to streetwalker culture and it’s genuinely moving in that direction. I feel for the children and adults who have to stomach it. The church isn’t immune to the problem. Trends find their way into pews on Sunday morning and men have complained.

While society uncovers itself some are opting for modesty instead and I hope it continues. No one considers the consequences of overexposure and what one may invite by dressing that way. My heart goes out to the men and husbands who are trying to do the right thing and honor the Lord and their spouse amidst this dilemma. We should ask the Lord to convict the offenders and raise a new standard of holiness in its place. That is my prayer.

Sometimes I think about writing. It would be cool to have a substack (or something like that, or a blog) where I could write things and it's actually seen by people.

peaceful-forest said:

Sometimes I think about writing. It would be cool to have a substack (or something like that, or a blog) where I could write things and it's actually seen by people.

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What topics would you like to write about for a blog ?

bèlla said:

It increasingly feels like we’re living in Sodom and Gomorrah and I’m growing tired of the proliferation of sex and debauchery in our culture. Barely there attire is having its moment before the congregation and men are speaking out. Gym attire is on the hot seat and many are complaining. Why is it necessary to be sexy while exercising with no concern for others? Most of the pieces are too sheer, too tight or leave nothing to the imagination.

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I'm surprised men are speaking out. Usually they're for it. Which is a big part of the problem. "If I tell what women to wear, my girlfriend will break up with me & I like women dressing like that anyways".

Actually, for a long time I refused to go to the gym b/c I knew the attire there is not good. Then I just started to realize that that attire is everywhere.

bèlla said:

Someone likened this behavior to streetwalker culture and it’s genuinely moving in that direction. I feel for the children and adults who have to stomach it. The church isn’t immune to the problem. Trends find their way into pews on Sunday morning and men have complained.

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Yeah, you see it at church. I'm thankful I go to a church that tends to attract the kind of person that sees that as a problem, but when I have opportunity to attend other churches, it's no different then the world what's being worn. I find that alarming. & it's like, I get it, it's not always meant for reasons like that, people just want to dress in a way that 'will give them confidence', but when you're a Christian, you're attitudes should be changing about what you're wearing. He's dressing you. When I was younger I would dress very plain & boring b/c I was uspet at everything & everyone. Then when I started to grow in the Lord I started to dress nicer. You can tell a lot about someone by how they dress, what is influencing them, how are they thinking, what's motivating them.

bèlla said:

While society uncovers itself some are opting for modesty instead and I hope it continues. No one considers the consequences of overexposure and what one may invite by dressing that way. My heart goes out to the men and husbands who are trying to do the right thing and honor the Lord and their spouse amidst this dilemma. We should ask the Lord to convict the offenders and raise a new standard of holiness in its place. That is my prayer.

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Yeah, it seems like it just gets worse. The ones who are trying to do it right are in the minority. Good luck raising a daughter in this age. They learn it from others. Today in church we discussed raising kids & influences they will face.
It's an interesting topic for me. Many Christian parents want to be very strict following the Bible's commands for parents. Many Christian parents are more lax. They think we can't live & we don't live in a bubble. I think Option 1 tends to forget that. But I think Option 2 is too lax.

I don't know, I try to not let it bother me b/c most of the time it's not Christians anyways, so like, they can't help themselves b/c they don't have the Holy Spirit.
& one reason it bothers me is b/c it's not limited to the pagans, & they're influencing us

DragonFox91 said:

I'm surprised men are speaking out. Usually they're for it. Which is a big part of the problem. "If I tell what women to wear, my girlfriend will break up with me & I like women dressing like that anyways". Actually, for a long time I refused to go to the gym b/c I knew the attire there is not good. Then I just started to realize that that attire is everywhere.

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I’m glad they’re speaking out. It’s unfortunate they realize the indecency has gone too far and women are clueless. Every since leggings became a trend it’s been a downhill spiral.

DragonFox91 said:

You can tell a lot about someone by how they dress, what is influencing them, how are they thinking, what's motivating them.

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That wasn’t acceptable in the past. The older women in the church would take them aside and counsel them. Many women don’t get that at home and rely on the internet for fashion advice. I saw a reel with a woman getting dressed and she had on a slip. Few knew what it was. Moments like that are jarring. You know we’ve gone too far but when it hits you in the face it’s sad.

I think modesty is best for both. When a woman uncovers herself she invites the wrong attention. Some are doing it because of trends and others desire the male gaze. They want to be noticed but that isn’t the way you should go about it.

DragonFox91 said:

Yeah, it seems like it just gets worse. The ones who are trying to do it right are in the minority. Good luck raising a daughter in this age. They learn it from others. Today in church we discussed raising kids & influences they will face.

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You need level-headed parents with common sense. If they haven’t found their way to God the other will keep them sound. There was a piece about a popular song today and the line dance many are doing. It seems harmless but it’s being played in church which was shocking but that isn’t worst part. Videos appeared on Tik-Tok of a little girl doing the same. They gave her a stage name and started booking her for events and she’s 3-4 years old.

The first one was tame but the rest were not. She’s mimicking the women around her and performing for adults. If that isn’t bad enough the parents created an account on OnlyFans where she’ll provide lessons. I haven’t confirmed the latter but we were so incensed by the notion that we entreated the Lord on her behalf. Warnings were given in the comments but they’re seduced by the money and I think we’ll see more of that.

DragonFox91 said:

It's an interesting topic for me. Many Christian parents want to be very strict following the Bible's commands for parents. Many Christian parents are more lax. They think we can't live & we don't live in a bubble. I think Option 1 tends to forget that. But I think Option 2 is too lax.

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I think structure is a must and boundaries should be clear and enforced. You don’t have to lock them up but communication is required. Most parents go awry because they won’t tell the truth and hide their mistakes. Which gives an air of perfection and makes the child feel misunderstood. I wove our mishaps into lessons which became sources of humor later on. You’ll have a closer bond by doing so and they’ll confide in you as they mature.

DragonFox91 said:

I don't know, I try to not let it bother me b/c most of the time it's not Christians anyways, so like, they can't help themselves b/c they don't have the Holy Spirit. & one reason it bothers me is b/c it's not limited to the pagans, & they're influencing us

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Christians do the same. You’d be surprised. Someone I follow on YouTube was convicted of her gym attire and she’s an author with a ministry. I doubt she went as far as some. But cleavage, short dresses and fitted clothing are pretty common. Nevertheless, there’s a place for things like that. It’s meant to be worn for your spouse and that’s the missing component. They don’t have a husband and they’re taking the foreplay outdoors when it belongs elsewhere.

peaceful-forest said:

Sometimes I think about writing. It would be cool to have a substack (or something like that, or a blog) where I could write things and it's actually seen by people.

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Maybe you should. What’s holding you back?

Things that make you go hmm…

When you open YouTube and the title says woman leads a prayer at church while wearing a blazer and booty shorts. And you couldn’t see her bottoms at all. All you saw were pantyhose. I’m beginning to wonder if the devil is sending them. There’s no way you could think that’s okay. Thankfully, she’s being rebuked by men and women. We need more of that.

Please pray!

LoveDivine said:

What topics would you like to write about for a blog ?

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I've been thinking about my experience with Gab and writing about that, and calling out the falsehood on there.

For example, one of the things they promote is that everyone should get married and have children. But that actually contradicts the Bible and real life. There are some that are unable to have children, and there are some that have been called to celibacy. So how can they claim that God's will is for everyone get married (especially get married young) and have children?

bèlla said:

Maybe you should. What’s holding you back?

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I haven't written anything out. If I have said anything about Gab, it's either on here or my Bluesky account.

I'm not sure if what I'd like to write would be appropriate for Substack, but definitely another place where the article (or a comment) can be various lengths.

peaceful-forest said:

I've been thinking about my experience with Gab and writing about that, and calling out the falsehood on there.

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Are you prepared for the blowback from your perspective? Including personal insults and harassment? I’m not trying to discourage you but it’s important you consider the climate when choosing a topic. Many begin with good intentions but the stress and negativity can take a toll. Just being honest.

peaceful-forest said:

I haven't written anything out. If I have said anything about Gab, it's either on here or my Bluesky account.

I'm not sure if what I'd like to write would be appropriate for Substack, but definitely another place where the article (or a comment) can be various lengths.

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I would address the topic without bringing Gab into it. You’ll add fuel to the fire and unless you have a word about taking them on specifically that’s confirmed. I wouldn’t do it. You can discuss unbiblical teachings without taking shots at the platform. And you‘d need to consider monetization in light of that. Is this a pet project or a side hustle? If the latter’s the goal be strategic.

bèlla said:

Are you prepared for the blowback from your perspective? Including personal insults and harassment? I’m not trying to discourage you but it’s important you consider the climate when choosing a topic. Many begin with good intentions but the stress and negativity can take a toll. Just being honest.

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I don't ever intend on posting it on a place where I would get massive hate about it, like Gab.

From what I've been able to see on Bluesky, nobody likes Gab.

But you do bring up a good point about getting all sorts of negativity from the writing. And it is most certainly something I need to think about.


I will reveal a personal experience I had when I did have a Gab account: a well-known account on there had made an unbiblical statement about women. I responded back with the truth. I wasn't rude or inappropriate in any way. He blocked me later that day. I was actually upset about it because I did like his posts. But I believe that's when my eyes were opened about what exactly was going on there. I don't regret what I said to him. To me, it revealed that he was a phony, and was not interested in serving God the right way.

I would address the topic without bringing Gab into it. You’ll add fuel to the fire and unless you have a word about taking them on specifically that’s confirmed. I wouldn’t do it. You can discuss unbiblical teachings without taking shots at the platform. And you‘d need to consider monetization in light of that. Is this a pet project or a side hustle? If the latter’s the goal be strategic.

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I wasn't interested in making money off my writings. I just wanted to write.

I do think Gab is a propaganda place to convince people to engage in certain things that are passed off as Christianity when it is not. I was one of those people that fell for some of it. It's dangerous, especially if you don't know the truth. But God rescued me from the lies and showed me the truth.

One of the things is this trad wife stuff. They try to tell people that women "voluntarily left good homes" to practice feminism; they completely ignore cases where the abusive husband left the wife, or the wife had to divorce the abusive husband. They tell people to get married young and have babies; not everyone can do that. They call women derogatory names, while ignoring men's sins.

Gab has satan-inspired things going on that is passed off as "Christianity".

peaceful-forest said:

I don't ever intend on posting it on a place where I would get massive hate about it, like Gab.

From what I've been able to see on Bluesky, nobody likes Gab.

But you do bring up a good point about getting all sorts of negativity from the writing. And it is most certainly something I need to think about.


I will reveal a personal experience I had when I did have a Gab account: a well-known account on there had made an unbiblical statement about women. I responded back with the truth. I wasn't rude or inappropriate in any way. He blocked me later that day. I was actually upset about it because I did like his posts. But I believe that's when my eyes were opened about what exactly was going on there. I don't regret what I said to him. To me, it revealed that he was a phony, and was not interested in serving God the right way.




I wasn't interested in making money off my writings. I just wanted to write.

I do think Gab is a propaganda place to convince people to engage in certain things that are passed off as Christianity when it is not. I was one of those people that fell for some of it. It's dangerous, especially if you don't know the truth. But God rescued me from the lies and showed me the truth.

One of the things is this trad wife stuff. They try to tell people that women "voluntarily left good homes" to practice feminism; they completely ignore cases where the abusive husband left the wife, or the wife had to divorce the abusive husband. They tell people to get married young and have babies; not everyone can do that. They call women derogatory names, while ignoring men's sins.

Gab has satan-inspired things going on that is passed off as "Christianity".

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I hate this mentality. It pretty much reduces a woman's entire worth and value to being a wife/ mother. Not everyone desires that or will be fortunate enough to experience that. They shouldn't be made to feel worthless. Obviously, these are very important roles that should be celebrated, but far more important is a woman's devotion to Christ. These types actually don't care about that; it's more important to them that a woman please men rather than God. They always emphasize submission to their husband and hardly ever submission to Christ. It shows their priorities. There are many women who may be called by God to serve him in specific ways that are not confined to the roles of motherhood or being a wife. The early church was filled with women who died for their faith. They died brutal deaths like heroes. Yet somehow, we care more about how many children a woman has by the time she's 30? Lol. It's stupid.

peaceful-forest said:

But you do bring up a good point about getting all sorts of negativity from the writing. And it is most certainly something I need to think about.

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Negativity is a powder keg on the internet and there’s too much rage bait. This is where people air their grievances and let off steam. Middle ground is advisable and you don’t want to be pigeonholed into camps or factions. Balance your commentary with real life applications. Share the concern about a misconception and how you address it and what you’ve learned from your study. You can also include uplifting feedback for singles and others lacking companionship and support. I think that’s a stronger topic overall.

peaceful-forest said:

I will reveal a personal experience I had when I did have a Gab account: a well-known account on there had made an unbiblical statement about women. I responded back with the truth. I wasn't rude or inappropriate in any way. He blocked me later that day. I was actually upset about it because I did like his posts. But I believe that's when my eyes were opened about what exactly was going on there. I don't regret what I said to him. To me, it revealed that he was a phony, and was not interested in serving God the right way.

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Writing isn’t about us and bear in mind its relation to the gifts of the spirit. How can your musings serve the kingdom? When you put yourself in the public eye you have a different responsibility. You‘re representing Him in the media. You don’t have the liberty in that space you’d have elsewhere. We lead with light not grievances. God is bigger than Gab.

peaceful-forest said:

I do think Gab is a propaganda place to convince people to engage in certain things that are passed off as Christianity when it is not. I was one of those people that fell for some of it. It's dangerous, especially if you don't know the truth. But God rescued me from the lies and showed me the truth.

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It’s important to make peace with the reality of this medium. Independence is a fallacy and most platforms are owned by the major players or acquired by them at a later time. Christians are operating on other people’s real estate and they will silence you. We have to use our heads to get our message out without setting off landmines. Remember Paul’s words.

peaceful-forest said:

One of the things is this trad wife stuff. They try to tell people that women "voluntarily left good homes" to practice feminism; they completely ignore cases where the abusive husband left the wife, or the wife had to divorce the abusive husband. They tell people to get married young and have babies; not everyone can do that. They call women derogatory names, while ignoring men's sins.

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Sometimes irritants are callings in disguise. The things that upset or bother may be places for ministry and service. You have a beef with the media —-and that’s what Gab is—and it’s misrepresentation of christian teachings. There’s only one way to combat it. You have to join the fray. But you can’t allow injury to blind you to the truth and fair-mindedness is a must. Scripture is our primary source for the word of God not the internet.

We’re responsible for the things we take in and given principles to follow for discernment. If users opt to do otherwise you can’t ignore their culpability. Due diligence begins with us and ignoring that is costly. Irrespective to what the platform says or how they describe themselves. The lies wouldn’t land if they were in the book. That’s your quandary. How will you solve it? The dilemma was entrusted to you. ;-)

I would commune with the Lord and strategize. And you need to be monetized. If you do it right it’ll grow and require more time and commitment. You have an opportunity to solve a lot of problems by doing so. Not only your concerns about the scripture but personal issues you’ve mentioned recently. You’ll meet a lot of people over time.

Nevertheless, I like it. Just be shrewd and you’ll be okay. Don’t play into their hands and get shadow banned. You know what we wrestle against. Keep that in mind in your decisions.

~bella

LoveDivine said:

I hate this mentality. It pretty much reduces a woman's entire worth and value to being a wife/ mother.

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They’re probably playing to the algorithm. Most of the comments from single women desiring a spouse are overwhelmingly seeking the same. They’re not focused on careers they’re looking for security. You’d have to look into their analytics and find the racial makeup. Trad wife content began with caucasian women and the majority were mormon in the early days. Most of the content on food, parenting, home, wellness and crafts was provided by mormon wives and I was there at the beginning.

Now we’re on 2.0 and the christian variant is foremost but that’s a little misleading because a lot of them are mormon but they use a different label. The church doesn’t give christian wives what the other receives. They don’t have to homestead because they’re getting compensation elsewhere. That’s why Nara Smith and Ballerina Farm are popular. They have the mormon media behind them and the majority aren’t aware how many they have in the public eye influencing viewers.

Don’t get me wrong. I don’t think everyone is called to marriage and the majority can’t afford to live on one salary. But when you’re working 9 to 5 and watching someone on the screen playing with sourdough and looking relaxed it messes with your head. Before the pandemic women weren’t seeking six figures en masse. That’s an outgrowth of the lockdown and you’re seeing it in retail and advertising because it sells.

There’s a lot of women wishing they could have the same and they’ve garnered male support. Some are pronatalists, others prefer traditional roles, some want self-sufficiency along with the others and so on. Stay-at-home wives are the new flex on social media. That’s why it’s getting so much attention. And the 50/50 conversations are part of that.

~bella

bèlla said:

They’re probably playing to the algorithm. Most of the comments from single women desiring a spouse are overwhelmingly seeking the same. They’re not focused on careers they’re looking for security. You’d have to look into their analytics and find the racial makeup. Trad wife content began with caucasian women and the majority were mormon in the early days. Most of the content on food, parenting, home, wellness and crafts was provided by mormon wives and I was there at the beginning.

Now we’re on 2.0 and the christian variant is foremost but that’s a little misleading because a lot of them are mormon but they use a different label. The church doesn’t give christian wives what the other receives. They don’t have to homestead because they’re getting compensation elsewhere. That’s why Nara Smith and Ballerina Farm are popular. They have the mormon media behind them and the majority aren’t aware how many they have in the public eye influencing viewers.

Don’t get me wrong. I don’t think everyone is called to marriage and the majority can’t afford to live on one salary. But when you’re working 9 to 5 and watching someone on the screen playing with sourdough and looking relaxed it messes with your head. Before the pandemic women weren’t seeking six figures en masse. That’s an outgrowth of the lockdown and you’re seeing it in retail and advertising because it sells.

There’s a lot of women wishing they could have the same and they’ve garnered male support. Some are pronatalists, others prefer traditional roles, some want self-sufficiency along with the others and so on. Stay-at-home wives are the new flex on social media. That’s why it’s getting so much attention. And the 50/50 conversations are part of that.

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That's interesting. I wasn't aware of the Mormon connection. I've watched some channels that I don't mind. Farmhouse on Boone is one that comes to mind. It can be relaxing to watch someone do ordinary tasks and cook, etc. It's also more wholesome than all the garbage out there. I agree with your point that the lifestyle they promote can seem really special to those who are stressed from working full days. But it's also important to remember that is their job - they get endorsements and are paid to promote their content. There is nothing wrong with that, but it's also not an entirely accurate picture of the lifestyle. I think they glorify it and it can make some women feel inadequate. It's not entirely attainable to live that way unless it is your source of income. I just wish there was balance. There is so much gross, sexual content bombarding us regularly ( combined with insane feminism ) and then there is this trend. In general it seems that everyone wants to become an influencer or have a YouTube channel. I think the unrealistic expectations have destroyed the work ethic for many.

Yeah, we've discussed this in the past. Even otherwise good Christian teachers on social media really emphasize the need for people to have children & that's what people need to do. They'll post very true things about the Bible & being a Christian & then you'll get a post like 'get married & have LOTS of children! The Bible says this!' & it's like, what?

I try to ignore those posts now. Clearly they are not talking to singles or couples who otherwise can't have children. I also don't think they factor in the timing should be right.

I really wish there were more Christian leaders who were single. (The other day I was thinking why does it seem all the missionaries are married when the Apostle Paul was single?)

@LoveDivine I've seen posts saying like motherhood is the highest calling or whatever, & that's not true. You are right. Whatever a Christian's calling is is the highest calling b/c it's a calling from the Lord. He placed it special for that individual person. We are all given different missions. And we also all have the same mission in saving souls.

A lot of these attitudes aren't new & go back the beginning. We see Jacob's wives have this attitude for example in Genesis. But the Bible says 'in that day the barren will rejoice.' They have not been forgotten. The overwhelming message of the Bible is it is not a sign of where you stand w/ God.

People like the 'be fruitful & multiply' verse but they ignore that means multiplying in God's image. If you are not multiplying in God's image, you're not fulling the command. (I wonder now if it's not so much a command as it is 'I am allowing you to'). So since there's a lot of people not in God's image, it is up to those further along to help them. In this way, we can all help here & are following God's command. To make sure no one is still confused, Jesus settles this w/ the Great Commission.

All this being said, I do believe if a couple is capable, they should have children. I think the Traditionalists are right there. But I think a lot of them got married at 18, had children at 19, & think that's just how life is for everyone.

I was browsing the Mormon website not too long ago & there was a lot on marriage. It appeared to be one of their main hooks. Both marriage now & marriage in heaven. A clever lure to draw people in