Hi, all!
I’m on the very edge again, financially. Prayers much appreciated. If anyone feels so moved, I have an American credit union account. I feel ashamed to ask for help. All these years I have been one who helped others. Now I am forced to swallow my pride and accept whatever with gratitude. Kind people have helped out, but it runs out.
I’ve been surviving off of charity over the past year and a half at least, collectively, we have been making only two grand a month where our real expenses add up to three. This situation arose in part because I was misled when we moved here; I thought we would each be getting a basic salary of one grand each plus another for me in after-school/weekend lessons; it turned out to be only half of that. We scrambled, both took on more lessons, both online and off,but it wasn’t enough. Without my mother’s widower, we’d have already sunk, but he has reached his limits, too. Other people have showed kindness in one-shot deals, and I’m grateful, but it’s used up. We’ve gotten a long way. My older daughter, over the next year, should be able to mostly support herself in Germany (she already works teaching German as a foreign language, but it’s not enough for rent, tuition, insurance, food, and spending money), but my son will still need support for the same for a few years; he has already started working what they allow students there to do, but it’s hardly a quarter-time job, not good for more than spending money. We have to provide a little more than one grand for the two of them monthly. I have been doing it through online work with Russian clients, but got a bad blow this week - the phone I relied on to handle the banking died completely, and the tech wizards in the capital city could not revive it, and thanks to sanctions, you can’t download the apps and they block international banking with Russia every way they can.
I’m ready and able to work, but can’t find paying clients any more, and I have to charge what I’m really worth - I worked myself close to a heart attack on the local minimum wage my first year; frightened my wife to death, and had to cut back my workload. And the local economy is depressed, and the locals can’t pay much. My current school is in financial default, and we the teachers do not know if and when we will be paid further.
We are also being pressed to move back to Russia, for multiple reasons, but the climate in Russia is really hostile to us, as Americans, as anti-war, as anti-Stalinist and anti-lock-step with government positions. We (myself, grandmother, and my younger daughter) are completely alone here, only my wife has friends. The situation with those two is not good, I can’t give details, but if something bad happened here, we’d be in big trouble, we barely avoided a complete disaster this last month. So going back to Russia is seriously on the table, though how I’d support my kids in Germany from Russia through this financial and digital iron curtain, I have no idea. We ourselves could get by, though barely. At least we own a home and have access in theory to basic medical care there and a roght to live there, not as tourists or on VERY temporary residency like here. But even that requires money and overcoming difficulties, like getting our car back there through the sanction blockades, and restarting life there.
Or we stay here. I do have offers that might prove more serious and stable in the fall, though I’d have to go and work in another city. The issues and worries about my legs and health, and grandmother and our daughter, would remain in force. We’d have to survive the summer, and this year we won’t have to pay double rent in July and August, but it will go up 33% and the summer camp that we ran for two years that paid for those summers is not materializing this year so far.
There’s more, but it wearies me to tell it all, and if I were not at the end of my rope, I’d just soldier on like so many of you are. We all have our problems. I’ve currently got just enough in my American credit union account to pay for my daughter‘s passport. She just turned 16 and needs an adult passport. I’ve been robbing from the cash that I had hoped to pay for next month‘s rent with, due in a week or so. I may or may not get paid for my work at the school in April in a couple of weeks. Some things I can only say to a priest. We’ve got food on the table for this week, and that’s it. I hope to get 100€ for a translation job I did next week, but that’s how thin things are.
I feel ashamed to ask, but if anyone feels they can help, I’ll take any help I can get. I’ve taken care of myself all my life, but now, hitting my sixth full decade, and still responsible to support children and the elderly, I am overwhelmed. I need incarnate help.
Even your prayers help. I am sure that when I was in the hospital with my daughter, we could have gotten in serious trouble, but I believe St Nicholas interceded for us, in part through your prayers. I’m not willingbto write about that publicly, though.