So now we’re in this territory:
They don’t get as much regular exposure to someone of the same sex or opposite sex as someone with two opposite gendered parents. The most loving thing a same-sex parent could do would be to divorce their same-sexed spouse and bring an opposite gendered parent into the household. It’s not just speculation anymore. We have testimonials from these parents and their children.
1. Children with the two parents of the same sex as themselves struggle to relate to the opposite gender correctly. I remember watching a video of a girl raised by lesbian parents who was scared of men, for example, and she had to get over that. People in these situations may adopt homosexuality themselves because they view heterosexuality as too difficult or homosexuality as “normal”. If they wish to be heterosexual and follow Christ, they are left with a long and painful journey of learning about the opposite sex and how to relate to them correctly, while at the same time avoiding sexual compromise and getting pulled into abusive relationships (how are they supposed to avoid abusers when they don’t know what normal male or female behavior is like?).
2. Children with two parents of the opposite sex as themselves struggle to know who they are in terms of gender. I read a story in
To My Trans Sisters about a biological male who turned trans because he was surrounded by women growing up with no male influence to show him who he was. Thus he assumed he was a girl too.
Admittedly this can have better outcomes, but it requires proactive effort on the part of the parents to expose their child to other same-sex adults. Example:
The other idea of a woman being raised by two dads creeps me out a bit because it’s similar to how I was raised, only much worse. As a woman being raised with my dad and brother, I was left with twice the amount of masculine influence, despite the fact that my mom was around. This means that I adopted a masculine temperament and was criticized by my female peer group for not performing as a woman. To this day it’s easier for me to get along with men and boys in my life and I still struggle with makeup and being female, getting along with women, and dealing with my significant quantity of masculine hobbies. I was fortunate that my mom taught me how to sew and how to read and how to study the Scriptures, at least. These are all things that Christian women are expected to do, in addition to cooking delicious baked goods (the latter of which I had to learn on my own).
I was raised with the idea that femininity was weak and inferior and that I had to perform masculinity to be accepted by the men in my life, and even to be myself. I’m not saying that’s universal, but I confess discomfort with the idea. Not to mention the fact that if the two dads aren’t actually loving, the consequences could be horrific beyond all description.
