- Feb 13, 2019
- 1,306
- 854
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- Country
- United States
- Faith
- Lutheran
- Marital Status
- Married
In 2014, I was diagnosed with Cancer. I have been put through the ringer since then with surgeries, procedures, and the list goes on. About that time my wife started a online affair with another man.
Since then using credit cards, loans, our savings, and not paying our bills for the last three months, she has sent him close to $100,000. I found out about it just last month. She admitted to it, said she was wrong, an sorry, but she won't take full responsibility, if she doesn't like the questions, she just says I don't remember. If you ask me, she has no remorse, no shame, she doesn't care what her actions have done to our family, and feels quite proud of it.
She lied to me about our finances a thousand times, and took steps to hide her actions, and cover her tracks. She put this guy above me, our adult children, our innocent pets, our home, and our property. She said she will "NEVER" do anything like this again, but she won't come clean about anything other than "yes I did it".
She has devastated us financially, we will at some point have to file chapter 7 bankruptcy, which doesn't matter to her either. I am under no illusion she will stop these behaviors, she hid it from me for six years, and I will have no way of knowing if she gets additional credit cards, or other email, or social media accounts.
Some months after this started, she retained an attorney ($10,000 part of our savings) and made plans to abandon me in the Hospital following one of the major operations I had in 2015. She won't come clean about why, or who the attorney was, she just says "yep I gave him the money" but claims to not remember why, same with the $5,000 (more of our savings) she wire transfered to some guy in the UK..."I don't remember" and another $7,000 (the rest of our savings) sent to "Janet Ward" with the same "don't remember".
We have been married 35 years, and are knocking on the back door of 60 years of age (57 and 58). I can't say I hate her, I love her, but she has lied so much, destroyed us financially, and was so calm and collected about it, so calculating, and proud of what she has done, and absolutely cares nothing about those she has hurt, or the repercussions of her actions.
Additionally, she is the subject of a lawsuit from somebody in New Jersey who claims she sold them $5,600 in devalued gift cards, she admits it, but it doesn't concern her that she ripped the guy off, she claims to have "proof" that they were fully charged when she sold them...trust me, I doubt she has any proof.
Although I love her, I can barely stand to look at her, or stay in the same room with her, I want out. I don't know if any of this qualifies as a biblical reason for divorce, but she is slowly killing me, and using up what life I have left, as I have never been in remission from the Cancer, and have taken a turn for the worse over the last eight months. I have some very aggressive treatments coming up in the following weeks, and I don't think I can trust her to be there for me.
Any comments, suggestions, or Ideas would be appreciated.
Thank you all.
Since then using credit cards, loans, our savings, and not paying our bills for the last three months, she has sent him close to $100,000. I found out about it just last month. She admitted to it, said she was wrong, an sorry, but she won't take full responsibility, if she doesn't like the questions, she just says I don't remember. If you ask me, she has no remorse, no shame, she doesn't care what her actions have done to our family, and feels quite proud of it.
She lied to me about our finances a thousand times, and took steps to hide her actions, and cover her tracks. She put this guy above me, our adult children, our innocent pets, our home, and our property. She said she will "NEVER" do anything like this again, but she won't come clean about anything other than "yes I did it".
She has devastated us financially, we will at some point have to file chapter 7 bankruptcy, which doesn't matter to her either. I am under no illusion she will stop these behaviors, she hid it from me for six years, and I will have no way of knowing if she gets additional credit cards, or other email, or social media accounts.
Some months after this started, she retained an attorney ($10,000 part of our savings) and made plans to abandon me in the Hospital following one of the major operations I had in 2015. She won't come clean about why, or who the attorney was, she just says "yep I gave him the money" but claims to not remember why, same with the $5,000 (more of our savings) she wire transfered to some guy in the UK..."I don't remember" and another $7,000 (the rest of our savings) sent to "Janet Ward" with the same "don't remember".
We have been married 35 years, and are knocking on the back door of 60 years of age (57 and 58). I can't say I hate her, I love her, but she has lied so much, destroyed us financially, and was so calm and collected about it, so calculating, and proud of what she has done, and absolutely cares nothing about those she has hurt, or the repercussions of her actions.
Additionally, she is the subject of a lawsuit from somebody in New Jersey who claims she sold them $5,600 in devalued gift cards, she admits it, but it doesn't concern her that she ripped the guy off, she claims to have "proof" that they were fully charged when she sold them...trust me, I doubt she has any proof.
Although I love her, I can barely stand to look at her, or stay in the same room with her, I want out. I don't know if any of this qualifies as a biblical reason for divorce, but she is slowly killing me, and using up what life I have left, as I have never been in remission from the Cancer, and have taken a turn for the worse over the last eight months. I have some very aggressive treatments coming up in the following weeks, and I don't think I can trust her to be there for me.
Any comments, suggestions, or Ideas would be appreciated.
Thank you all.
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