God will bring you a husband I have no doubt. Been keeping my vow no sex til marriage 18 years. I am a man waiting on a wife. There is someone for you be patient and don't settle. Stand strong in The Lord.
I know what you mean. Some great guys that are totally good for you and good to you just aren't the one. In this day and age though the pickings are slim as good husband material is few and far between. Mens values have changed or something. The culture has become so superficial and perverse with inappropriate contentography and infidelity. Like everyone does it and it is normal. It is not normal. When I was growing up people went on dates. Occasionally you would have the taboo " one night stand". Nowadays " hookups" are the thing, where the first date is a meeting based entirely around sex and there is no getting to know someone. Men are the number one threat to women so how is this even remotely a good idea? I have been asked blatantly rude, forward, perverted things by taxi drivers like it was no big deal and the level of disrespect is astonishing. I don't know if I would trust another human being with the salvation of my soul. It is too important to me and for the most part your everyday run of the mill human being that is out there today honestly is not worth it.
( 1 ) Yes! You can't marry a man just because he ticks the boxes I.e he's good or impressive etc but you don't have feelings for him, it doesn't work, it's called 'settling' for anyone, rather than 'the someone', and it breaks both hearts, believe me I've been on both sides of this fence and it's very painful for both concerned either side of the coin, I think God gives us feelings and a brain so we can use both.
I really feel for you Lybrah,
All good points but I should add that women are not entirely innocent in the Quantum leap. The Women's movement put women in careers where they outshined their male counterparts and basically left the kids to be raised by relatives, day care, or nannies and in cases where the parents split up, alone. Don't get me wrong- I get it. Women's equality, Blah blah but the families suffered. Men got insecure. Thus born the ' Sugar Mama's. I don't know how the American Church created a monster, but I know Hugh Hefner and Larry Flint did. Men are so perverse and one tracked it has become impossible to think of a nice man taking you out to dinner without being asked inappropriate questions and assuming it's a free-for-all. Let's just say the quality of people has changed. The media exploits women in the name of strength. It is no secret that the music industry invested in a bunch of for profit prisons and told the rappers to rap about violence and guns to keep the prisons full to make them money. The whole world is selling out to the devil for a quick buck they will have for a second compared to eternity.
Amen to that.There's culpability on both sides.
The Women's Movement would have little effect on happy campers. If the marriage was fulfilling and mutual respect and regard was plentiful; earning a wage wouldn't diminish the union. But that wasn't the case. There were a lot of disgruntled women at home. Work became an escape hatch that provided the autonomy and recognition they lacked. They didn't want to be under his thumb.
It's important to recognize your partner's contribution. Whether it's financial, domestic, etc. Everybody wants to be appreciated. Taking people for granted never ends well.
Insecurity is innate and often begins in childhood. That's where the breach occurs. We compensate for those experiences as an adult. Which is why some men define themselves by their work or what they earn. Performance may have been the lone avenue for notice. If he got good grades or an award they made a big deal. But little achievements might have gone ignored. He equates success with acceptance and seeks esteem and validation from the opposite sex. But it didn't begin with her.
I'm not suggesting male/female interactions don't cause insecurities. But insecurity in itself is a culmination of experiences which fosters feelings of rejection, lack of safety, and so on. One encounter would rarely do it. It's the continuum which causes the problem.
When we're insecure we have to do some housekeeping and allow the Lord to heal and restore us. We can't look to others to fix it or make us feel better. We must seek wholeness.
Most women have no desire to be the breadwinner. And more than a few won't respect him if she is. Sometimes your market value is higher than your companion's. It takes a mature person to handle the difference. Disparities can create a negative atmosphere. High wage earners (women) must sift carefully. A suitor doesn't always reveal their discomfort. Some aren't aware.
Marriage gets a lot of focus. Many feel invisible or ignored who don't fall in that populace. Some suggest they've made it an idol. Overemphasizing one way of being while neglecting the rest is unbalanced. Some are called to marry and others are called to singleness. Both are valuable paths.
Gentlemen still exist. Not all men conduct themselves that way or saturate their minds with inappropriate content. inappropriate contentography is a problem. But disrespecting a woman is another matter. That's a character flaw.
I concur. I don't agree with disparaging messages for either sex. We all have strengths and weaknesses. Women are more empowered in the media than men. The pendulum has swung in the opposite direction. Both extremes were sinful. We're called to love. Not oppress one another.
We need God more than ever.
feeling's.they get in the way. You develope feeling's for a person over-time by getting to know them.
