I have a real good Christian friend that I met online. The only think that kept me from wanting to date her is the fact she has young children...esp. at our ages...mid-40s.
Anyways, that's not really the issue here. Me and her are real big movie buffs. We actually became very good friends and she's always keeping in touch with me. Seeing how I'm doing, etc. The way a good friend should be...I miss that I'm the one always having to make the phone calls to my friends or always the one reaching out.
We see movies together or talk about them a lot. She gets my references and such via TV and movie culture. Big movie buffs. I believe one time we were seeing a Marvel movie and the trailer for the new flick came out. It was a sequel from the 80s and she got enthusiastically excited! We also connect on a lot of other levels and interest and can pretty much just talk about anything as she's a deep person.
I figured that'd be next on our agenda when it came out...as it was quite obvious.
Later, I had showed her some additional footage of that upcoming flick, and apparently, it has some profanity in it. I didn't think much of it, but when the movie came out she said she'll pass on it because of that reason. That it would not get her closer to go God to be around profanity.
I was like "That was unexpected...when did this happen?!" She said in the past year, she has decided to even take her faith up a notch to avoid even these kinds of things. She equated profanity to pieces of embers from a fire, landing on your soul (I am paraphrasing)...but I'm thinking, "Um...what's with the funny talk?" I thought she kind of lost it overnight or something.
I dunno, but maybe I'm numb to profanity, but I"m just there to enjoy the story. Of course, when I was growing up, my dad cursed some when he'd be working on a project or something...and we'd even joke about the fact when the project was done. So it's no big thing to me. Water off a duck's back.
This got me thinking about finding a Christian woman in my life and how it's been either these types of women (no kissing before marriage, profanity in TV and movies, drinking occasionally, etc.) These kinds of things that women find to be deal breakers in a Christian partner, even claiming these men (like myself) are "Christian in name only"....which is rather presumptuous.
I had known a woman that refused to date a man that drinks, even a single beer order at a dinner gathering after Bible study. She had a crush on a guy, until he ordered a beer....later...she married him, so I guess she compromised on that hang up. I am guessing she felt she may have been unrealistic in her expectations? I"m guessing since she was always around him at church, the familiarity built some attraction...and she thought, "Meh, now the dirnkin' isn't such a big deal". Which happens.
So I talked to my female friend/movie buddy and mentioned how there are some Christians have the "live and let live" attitude. Basically I asked her, "Okay, so you don't watch those kinds of movies...anymore, would you be okay with your husband/boyfriend saying, 'Hey, me and Bill are going to see the new so-and-so movie! Is that okay?"
Basically, she can watch her Hallmark movies, and he can watch what he wants.
She said, "Nope, because then he'd be bringing that into the home".
That said, as a Christian, it's made it even all the more challenging to find a Christian woman. I told her this...and in fact, I said if it weren't for her kids, I'd be interested in her. I even told her that she's probably going to have a hard time finding a man that shares this specific belief about movie content....but she won't budge.
That said, I mean, which is worse, would you want your spouse stealing? Cheating on you? ....or watching a movie with some profanity? Is profanity really THAT big of a deal for some Christians as I know for some they don't even give it a thought?
I think this is where I had resolved to even dating Christians without such strict convictions. I've even considered single women that complain to be "spiritual" if anything.
Anyways, that's not really the issue here. Me and her are real big movie buffs. We actually became very good friends and she's always keeping in touch with me. Seeing how I'm doing, etc. The way a good friend should be...I miss that I'm the one always having to make the phone calls to my friends or always the one reaching out.
We see movies together or talk about them a lot. She gets my references and such via TV and movie culture. Big movie buffs. I believe one time we were seeing a Marvel movie and the trailer for the new flick came out. It was a sequel from the 80s and she got enthusiastically excited! We also connect on a lot of other levels and interest and can pretty much just talk about anything as she's a deep person.
I figured that'd be next on our agenda when it came out...as it was quite obvious.
Later, I had showed her some additional footage of that upcoming flick, and apparently, it has some profanity in it. I didn't think much of it, but when the movie came out she said she'll pass on it because of that reason. That it would not get her closer to go God to be around profanity.
I was like "That was unexpected...when did this happen?!" She said in the past year, she has decided to even take her faith up a notch to avoid even these kinds of things. She equated profanity to pieces of embers from a fire, landing on your soul (I am paraphrasing)...but I'm thinking, "Um...what's with the funny talk?" I thought she kind of lost it overnight or something.
I dunno, but maybe I'm numb to profanity, but I"m just there to enjoy the story. Of course, when I was growing up, my dad cursed some when he'd be working on a project or something...and we'd even joke about the fact when the project was done. So it's no big thing to me. Water off a duck's back.
This got me thinking about finding a Christian woman in my life and how it's been either these types of women (no kissing before marriage, profanity in TV and movies, drinking occasionally, etc.) These kinds of things that women find to be deal breakers in a Christian partner, even claiming these men (like myself) are "Christian in name only"....which is rather presumptuous.
I had known a woman that refused to date a man that drinks, even a single beer order at a dinner gathering after Bible study. She had a crush on a guy, until he ordered a beer....later...she married him, so I guess she compromised on that hang up. I am guessing she felt she may have been unrealistic in her expectations? I"m guessing since she was always around him at church, the familiarity built some attraction...and she thought, "Meh, now the dirnkin' isn't such a big deal". Which happens.
So I talked to my female friend/movie buddy and mentioned how there are some Christians have the "live and let live" attitude. Basically I asked her, "Okay, so you don't watch those kinds of movies...anymore, would you be okay with your husband/boyfriend saying, 'Hey, me and Bill are going to see the new so-and-so movie! Is that okay?"
Basically, she can watch her Hallmark movies, and he can watch what he wants.
She said, "Nope, because then he'd be bringing that into the home".
That said, as a Christian, it's made it even all the more challenging to find a Christian woman. I told her this...and in fact, I said if it weren't for her kids, I'd be interested in her. I even told her that she's probably going to have a hard time finding a man that shares this specific belief about movie content....but she won't budge.
That said, I mean, which is worse, would you want your spouse stealing? Cheating on you? ....or watching a movie with some profanity? Is profanity really THAT big of a deal for some Christians as I know for some they don't even give it a thought?
I think this is where I had resolved to even dating Christians without such strict convictions. I've even considered single women that complain to be "spiritual" if anything.
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