I'm confused and guilty and I'm not sure what to do or how to feel

[S.O.J.I.A.]

threadstarter seems to be on the right track.

 

[FireDragon76]

Really they accept the sprinkle baptism now in some of the Protestant churches? Didn't know that tbh

Yes, My baptism was only by sprinkling, which was common in the Methodist church back then, for reasons of practicality. The Lutheran tradition had affusion (pouring) as the oldest practice, the same as in Catholicism. The quantity of water doesn't determine the validity of the baptism, in fact this has been the understanding in the early Church going back to the Didache, which only expresses a preference for immersion without requiring it.

 

[FireDragon76]

There's nothing that stops you from being both evangelical and catholic. That is my orientation, after all, and I see plenty of examples of real Christians in the Catholic church who do not take their faith in Jesus as their Lord for granted. Your upbringing may have left you with an erroneous impression of what the substance of the Catholic faith actually is.

 

[98cwitr]

Visit some churches, see what fits. Take Sunday worship seriously and the church will come to you.

 

[NIrelandGillian]

I pray God will guide you and your boyfriend to a fellowship of believers where His Word is faithfully preached and the people are friendly with each other and towards visitors. I also pray for guidance and wisdom for you concerning your family and graciousness in your dealings with them.

Gillian

 

[Gwen-is-new!]

I really do want to learn about other religions. I've been doing some research and I'm going to meet with people to talk to. To be honest though, I would really like to be re-baptized if possible. I want to find a new start in Christ, and it would be nice to remember and consent to my baptism, since I was baptized as an infant. My Mum won't support it, but I want to do it. I really appreciate all your encouragement. I'm in an environment where I receive very little of that, and it's really hard to cope. Thanks for your help and insight.

Your post is exciting. It seems you have been "born again" - not a word you heard in the Catholic church. It seems you have repented and put your trust in Jesus Christ as your Lord and Savior, and by all means should be baptized as an adult - making your public profession and being submerged as a symbol of the death, burial, and resurrection of our Lord.

I would like to recommend this site: Bible Questions Answered

Keep your FOCUS on HIM - His love, joy, and peace, and your issues with your family will become very small

 

[AlexDTX]

I was born and raised Catholic, and considered myself a Catholic for most of my life. I was baptized and confirmed into the Catholic church, and went to church every Sunday. However, I never took my faith very seriously. Until a few years ago, I didn't even own a Bible, I didn't pray on a regular basis, and I basically just went through the motions of a Catholic life without really committing myself to God and entrusting my salvation to Jesus.

I've made some changes since then. About the time I started University, I began realizing the need for Christ to be an active part of my life, and to guide me. It was a turning point in my faith, and I was completely invested, as "new Christians" usually are. It would still rise and fall from time to time, but I've kept true to my beliefs and to God. I now pray on a regular basis, and am trying to keep in the habit of reading my Bible consistently.

You need to understand the difference between the organizations of the Church and the organism of the Church. It has also been called the visible and invisible church. Salvation has nothing to do with organization and everything to do with organism. Believers are everywhere. Walk with Jesus and He will use others to help you see the difference between the two. We are all the catholic church according to the etymological meanings: catholic is Latin meaning universal, and church is German meaning house, specifically, house of God. Our bodies are the house of God, not brick and mortar structures.

The foundation of organizations are doctrines, where as the foundation of the organism is Christ. If you have experienced the new birth, you have been organically joined to Jesus. Doctrines are tools, not life. Jesus is Life, but doctrines help us to understand Life if the doctrines are based in his Life. That means are the teachings based upon the knowledge of his character? He does not change. His values and design of creation came from his eternal being.

All things come in seasons. You will need a season of an organization to help you in understanding the Life. However, organizations are human efforts that have human needs, thus are also businesses. The needs of business, you will find, corrupt the doctrines of Life and tend to cause organizations to stray away from Life.

People speak of revivals because organizations can depart so much from Life that they become dead congregations, and the remembrance of the Life needs to come back.

Keep your eyes on Jesus and remember all his interactions with you. He is the litmus test to see if a denominations doctrine is life embracing or is that life being suffocated by the needs of business to death?

 

[Striver]

I would cover a couple of things for you:

1. Please do not base your decision entirely on how you feel. Closest label for me is Baptist, with an appreciation for both how the Reformed and Pentecostals tick. This will play into another bullet point, but limit what's meant by feeling to questions like: 1) Am I, most importantly, worshiping God where I am at? Is it reasonably in accord with Scripture? 2) Do I connect not only with the service/liturgy/etc, but also the people and the community? Churchgoing, like love and marriage, is not necessarily something that gives you the warm and fuzzies all of the time. Worship takes a bit of work and effort, and you may be flat at times, because we all are fallen and subject to emotions. Don't let someone in a different season of life make you feel guilty.
   
2. If you are no longer connected where you are at, move on. Trust me, I didn't move denominations (not yet anway), but my wife and I are in agreement that we stuck around too long at one church. Turns out some friends of ours felt the same for many of the same reasons, we later discovered. There was a real problem there that we both tried to trudge through. I vote for sticking to it at the start, but if it becomes clear God is telling you something about moving on, listen. I didn't - we didn't - and it affected other areas of our lives until we finally did it.
   
3. The grass is not always greener... In fact, as one preacher put it, the grass is really greener, but the water bill is higher. Any church will have problems. As believers, I think we must look to Scripture to see if the problems are run-of-the-mill, or if it is an issue of the heart regarding doctrine or practice.
   
4. Don't make a decision based upon the guilt, approval or _______ of others around you. We all are culturally wired and sometimes when you break out of the traditional culture, it can hurt loved ones. It's important to listen to others (Proverbs 11:14) and seek counsel, but it works to a point.

I didn't begin with the obligatory 1) Pray! and 2) Visit churches because you're saying you are already doing this alongside reading the Bible. As someone who was baptized twice, I have a little regret. In my story, my first baptism took place at the age of 13 and was something I wanted to do. At the time, I was a Methodist that had slipped in since we started out at a Baptist church before moving towns. At my last church, I let the pastor talk me into a dunking (immersion) because I felt it reasonable at the time and didn't see an obvious argument preventing immersion. I also felt somewhat obligated to do my part to help the church.

At the end of the day, I regret it a bit because it almost regards my first baptism as invalid, but I don't think it will be something that keeps me from heaven from what I've studied. My point with baptism is that it's so open ended, that I wouldn't get caught up on this one issue. That said, if you are convicted of believer baptism, then spend some time in prayer and study and go forward.

I pray for the working and blessing of God in your search!

 

[Emli]

I love hearing that you are committing to Christ. Your life will transform into the most wonderful experience! There will be a lot of trials, but it will be so worth it.

I have been a Christian for two years, and I have not been to church once. That may sound strange to a lot of people, but where I live, in Sweden, I'm not sure I had an option (the churches are very unbiblical).

God kept me from going to church, because He wanted to teach me how to rely on Him, not on other people. We have grown very close and I have learnt so much. The thing is, we don't need other people, we only need Christ. Maybe He wants you to learn how to rely on Him only as well. I'm not saying you shouldn't meet with other believers like I haven't, but I, like others in the thread, believe that it is a bad idea to commit to a particular church or a denomination, because we are supposed to commit to Him and to serve all of our sisters and brothers.

As others have said, you should rely on Scripture only. Believe all of it. That's what I did and Jesus has He has truly honored the promise that He made in John 14:21 "Whoever has my commands and keeps them is the one who loves me. The one who loves me will be loved by my Father, and I too will love them and show myself to them.” He will do this for you as well.

As for your mother... Remember that Christ told us to love Him more than our family. Luke 14:26 Keep this in mind and take great comfort in it. You are not wrong, even if it feels horrible. It can only bring you closer to Christ.

God bless you. I will pray for you.

 

[JESUS=G.O.A.T]

Yes, My baptism was only by sprinkling, which was common in the Methodist church back then, for reasons of practicality. The Lutheran tradition had affusion (pouring) as the oldest practice, the same as in Catholicism. The quantity of water doesn't determine the validity of the baptism, in fact this has been the understanding in the early Church going back to the Didache, which only expresses a preference for immersion without requiring it.

The quantity matters to an extent

Sure it doesn't matter if you are baptized in a pool, tub, river, but it does matter at least if your body is in water vs a raindrop.

Also if lets say baptism were to be a preference, and JESUS prefered immersion and the first church prefered immersion, and we all know the acts church did immersion, then why not do it? Why not do what JESUS and the first church "prefers".

 

[FireDragon76]

The quantity matters to an extent

Sure it doesn't matter if you are baptized in a pool, tub, river, but it does matter at least if your body is in water vs a raindrop.

Also if lets say baptism were to be a preference, and JESUS prefered immersion and the first church prefered immersion, and we all know the acts church did immersion, then why not do it? Why not do what JESUS and the first church "prefers".

Preference does not mean strict legal requirement. Particularly if there are things like size, cost, or modesty that are a factor.

 

[paul becke]

Hey everyone. I'm pretty new to this thread, so I'm sorry in advance for such a heavy question, but I think insights from other Christians might really help and somewhat calm the storm inside me.

I'm in a bit of a tough spot in my faith and I'm not really sure how to handle it. I don't have a lot of Christians in my life, so it's hard to know to to turn to in times of trial. This might be a longer post, so I'll probably post a tl;dr version at the end for those who don't want to/don't have the time to read it all.

I was born and raised Catholic, and considered myself a Catholic for most of my life. I was baptized and confirmed into the Catholic church, and went to church every Sunday. However, I never took my faith very seriously. Until a few years ago, I didn't even own a Bible, I didn't pray on a regular basis, and I basically just went through the motions of a Catholic life without really committing myself to God and entrusting my salvation to Jesus.

I've made some changes since then. About the time I started University, I began realizing the need for Christ to be an active part of my life, and to guide me. It was a turning point in my faith, and I was completely invested, as "new Christians" usually are. It would still rise and fall from time to time, but I've kept true to my beliefs and to God. I now pray on a regular basis, and am trying to keep in the habit of reading my Bible consistently.

Here's where the actual problem starts. I don't want to be a Catholic anymore. I'm still a Christian, but I consider myself more non-denominational, because I don't know which denomination will best fit what I've learned and what I beleive. Here are my main issues with the Catholic church:

1. We pray to saints. I know we're not using them as idles, but rather as mediators, but Jesus is the only mediator between Man and God. The Bible says this in 1 Timothy 2:5 " For there is one God, and there is one mediator between God and men, the man Christ Jesus". I don't believe that there is any benefit from praying to Saints. I don't if I'd call it sacrilegious, as that's a bit far, but it feels like a wasted prayer. We're only supposed to pray to God our Father and Jesus Christ as our mediator with the Father, since they're one in the same.

2. Many Catholics believe in purgatory. We don't talk about purgatory in church very often, but apparently it's still an accepted belief in the Catholic church. The need for purgatory, or a place of repentance would make Jesus' death meaningless, because it would mean that his death did not cleanse us of our sins and make us righteous in the eyes of God.

3. The Catholic church believes that confession is necessary. If you want to confess, go for it. It's good to confess your sins, but the Catholic church seems to promote that as the only way to be forgiven. I believe we can confess to God directly and He will still hear us. Also, Catholics priests give us penance to complete, like saying 8 Hail Marys. I find that wrong because it's praying to someone other than God, but also doesn't make anyone reflect on their sins or correctional actions. If you've sinned against someone, you should make it right with that person, and if you've sinned against God, make it right with God. Something about just saying the prayer 8 times and hope that makes it all okay is misguided to me, like there doesn't have to be real repentance involved. It certainly can and should be, and I'm sure many Catholics do take a confessional practice very seriously, but going through the motions is a possibility without much reflection.

So, those are a few reasons I'm distancing myself from Catholicism. I live in a house where my religion is a bit unsupported. My father is agnostic and very cynical about the existence of God. He believes in something greater than us, but not necessarily God. My mother is a non-practicing "paper Catholic". Like me, she was born and raised Catholic, she went through the motions and she still considers herself Catholic. However, she doesn't go to church, never reads the Bible, and the title seems to be all that matters. Please be clear that I'm not trying to put down my mother, but outlining the environment in which I live. My boyfriend of a year and a half is Baptist. I've been to his church and I really like it there. It's always very lively and people are much more friendly and social than my church, where people find their usual spot sit down, and then leave when mass is over. His entire family is Baptist and it's a very supportive environment. He can talk to his parents about religion, and discuss it without starting an argument or debate, and I want that so badly, but it's something that I don't have in my home environment. Being with him and his family has really helped me grow in my faith and explore other denominations and their practices, and I've never had the opportunity to do that before.

Ever since I began practicing my faith a few years back, my Mother has been asking why I became such a "Bible Thumper". If I ever do or say something that she doesn't approve of, she'll say that I'm not a good Christian like I pretend to be. Now that I'm trying to switch denominations, she hates it. The way she sees it, if I'm born and raised Catholic, I should always be Catholic, no matter what, don't even question it. She refuses to question anything and thinks it's wrong to do so, and she doesn't want me to be anything but Catholic. She thinks that my idea on changing denominations is because I'm piggybacking off someone else's faith, but I'm actually learning and growing in my own decisions.

I still technically belong to a Catholic church, but my boyfriend and I are looking into a new church. We've visited an Anglican church, next week we're going to a Baptist church, and we're also willing to look at Lutheran churches as a possibility. We're researching these denominations together and we're trying to find a good fit for both of us.

Today I didn't go to church. My boyfriend is working so we couldn't go together, and I was physically exhausted and wanted the extra sleep before I work this afternoon. I realize that it isn't a great or valid reason for missing church, but I took time to pray to God and ask him to help me get my faith in order and guide me in my faith journey.

My Oma (grandmother) who usually goes to church with me, since my parents don't go anymore, was criticizing me after she went to church. She was calling me lazy for not going without any good reason besides wanting extra sleep, and telling me that again, I'm not a good Christian and can't "pretend" that I'm serious about my faith. I told her that I'm still reading my Bible, but she said that doesn't matter at all because I'm not receiving the Eucharist, so obviously I'm not a very good Christian.

When I do go to the Catholic church however, my mother will tell me that I'm a hypocrite because I say I'm not a Catholic but still go to a Catholic church. Because I'm baptized and confirmed as a Catholic, my Oma says that I am legally a Catholic, and unless I'm baptized into another church, I will still be a Catholic and my mother absolutely hates the idea of me getting re-baptized as anything else, even though I feel like a second baptism and a new start with Christ would be a good thing. So now I'm here. I feel guilty for missing church, but I'm still not sure if I should still go to that church.

Tl;dr I'm SO torn because I don't want to be a Catholic anymore, but I don't know which Christian denomination I want to commit to yet. I live in a home without any spiritual support, and my mother hates that I want to be any other denomination, so she puts me down based on that. I'm trying to find a new church with my boyfriend, but we haven't made any final decisions yet. I'm criticized when I go to our family (Catholic) church, I'm criticized when I don't, so I constantly feel guilty whether I go or don't go. I'm trying to figure EVERYTHING out, but I don't know what to do or how to feel and whenever I make ANY decision or have any realization, I'm met with criticism from someone in my family telling me why I'm wrong. What should I do?

I am amazed that you are a cradle-Catholic and have picked up so little of the faith. I think you would do well to take the classes that new converts take before they formally become a Catholic, or else investigate some of the more mainstream Protestant churches, where virtually the whole congregation are well familiar with the Holy Spirit consciously and personally.

 

[JESUS=G.O.A.T]

Preference does not mean strict legal requirement. Particularly if there are things like size, cost, or modesty that are a factor.

True if you see baptism as a preference thing I see now how any form of baptism can pass. I see what you mean now.

 

[dqhall]

Hey everyone. I'm pretty new to this thread, so I'm sorry in advance for such a heavy question, but I think insights from other Christians might really help and somewhat calm the storm inside me.

I'm in a bit of a tough spot in my faith and I'm not really sure how to handle it. I don't have a lot of Christians in my life, so it's hard to know to to turn to in times of trial. This might be a longer post, so I'll probably post a tl;dr version at the end for those who don't want to/don't have the time to read it all.

I was born and raised Catholic, and considered myself a Catholic for most of my life. I was baptized and confirmed into the Catholic church, and went to church every Sunday. However, I never took my faith very seriously. Until a few years ago, I didn't even own a Bible, I didn't pray on a regular basis, and I basically just went through the motions of a Catholic life without really committing myself to God and entrusting my salvation to Jesus.

I've made some changes since then. About the time I started University, I began realizing the need for Christ to be an active part of my life, and to guide me. It was a turning point in my faith, and I was completely invested, as "new Christians" usually are. It would still rise and fall from time to time, but I've kept true to my beliefs and to God. I now pray on a regular basis, and am trying to keep in the habit of reading my Bible consistently.

Here's where the actual problem starts. I don't want to be a Catholic anymore. I'm still a Christian, but I consider myself more non-denominational, because I don't know which denomination will best fit what I've learned and what I beleive. Here are my main issues with the Catholic church:

1. We pray to saints. I know we're not using them as idles, but rather as mediators, but Jesus is the only mediator between Man and God. The Bible says this in 1 Timothy 2:5 " For there is one God, and there is one mediator between God and men, the man Christ Jesus". I don't believe that there is any benefit from praying to Saints. I don't if I'd call it sacrilegious, as that's a bit far, but it feels like a wasted prayer. We're only supposed to pray to God our Father and Jesus Christ as our mediator with the Father, since they're one in the same.

2. Many Catholics believe in purgatory. We don't talk about purgatory in church very often, but apparently it's still an accepted belief in the Catholic church. The need for purgatory, or a place of repentance would make Jesus' death meaningless, because it would mean that his death did not cleanse us of our sins and make us righteous in the eyes of God.

3. The Catholic church believes that confession is necessary. If you want to confess, go for it. It's good to confess your sins, but the Catholic church seems to promote that as the only way to be forgiven. I believe we can confess to God directly and He will still hear us. Also, Catholics priests give us penance to complete, like saying 8 Hail Marys. I find that wrong because it's praying to someone other than God, but also doesn't make anyone reflect on their sins or correctional actions. If you've sinned against someone, you should make it right with that person, and if you've sinned against God, make it right with God. Something about just saying the prayer 8 times and hope that makes it all okay is misguided to me, like there doesn't have to be real repentance involved. It certainly can and should be, and I'm sure many Catholics do take a confessional practice very seriously, but going through the motions is a possibility without much reflection.

So, those are a few reasons I'm distancing myself from Catholicism. I live in a house where my religion is a bit unsupported. My father is agnostic and very cynical about the existence of God. He believes in something greater than us, but not necessarily God. My mother is a non-practicing "paper Catholic". Like me, she was born and raised Catholic, she went through the motions and she still considers herself Catholic. However, she doesn't go to church, never reads the Bible, and the title seems to be all that matters. Please be clear that I'm not trying to put down my mother, but outlining the environment in which I live. My boyfriend of a year and a half is Baptist. I've been to his church and I really like it there. It's always very lively and people are much more friendly and social than my church, where people find their usual spot sit down, and then leave when mass is over. His entire family is Baptist and it's a very supportive environment. He can talk to his parents about religion, and discuss it without starting an argument or debate, and I want that so badly, but it's something that I don't have in my home environment. Being with him and his family has really helped me grow in my faith and explore other denominations and their practices, and I've never had the opportunity to do that before.

Ever since I began practicing my faith a few years back, my Mother has been asking why I became such a "Bible Thumper". If I ever do or say something that she doesn't approve of, she'll say that I'm not a good Christian like I pretend to be. Now that I'm trying to switch denominations, she hates it. The way she sees it, if I'm born and raised Catholic, I should always be Catholic, no matter what, don't even question it. She refuses to question anything and thinks it's wrong to do so, and she doesn't want me to be anything but Catholic. She thinks that my idea on changing denominations is because I'm piggybacking off someone else's faith, but I'm actually learning and growing in my own decisions.

I still technically belong to a Catholic church, but my boyfriend and I are looking into a new church. We've visited an Anglican church, next week we're going to a Baptist church, and we're also willing to look at Lutheran churches as a possibility. We're researching these denominations together and we're trying to find a good fit for both of us.

Today I didn't go to church. My boyfriend is working so we couldn't go together, and I was physically exhausted and wanted the extra sleep before I work this afternoon. I realize that it isn't a great or valid reason for missing church, but I took time to pray to God and ask him to help me get my faith in order and guide me in my faith journey.

My Oma (grandmother) who usually goes to church with me, since my parents don't go anymore, was criticizing me after she went to church. She was calling me lazy for not going without any good reason besides wanting extra sleep, and telling me that again, I'm not a good Christian and can't "pretend" that I'm serious about my faith. I told her that I'm still reading my Bible, but she said that doesn't matter at all because I'm not receiving the Eucharist, so obviously I'm not a very good Christian.

When I do go to the Catholic church however, my mother will tell me that I'm a hypocrite because I say I'm not a Catholic but still go to a Catholic church. Because I'm baptized and confirmed as a Catholic, my Oma says that I am legally a Catholic, and unless I'm baptized into another church, I will still be a Catholic and my mother absolutely hates the idea of me getting re-baptized as anything else, even though I feel like a second baptism and a new start with Christ would be a good thing. So now I'm here. I feel guilty for missing church, but I'm still not sure if I should still go to that church.

Tl;dr I'm SO torn because I don't want to be a Catholic anymore, but I don't know which Christian denomination I want to commit to yet. I live in a home without any spiritual support, and my mother hates that I want to be any other denomination, so she puts me down based on that. I'm trying to find a new church with my boyfriend, but we haven't made any final decisions yet. I'm criticized when I go to our family (Catholic) church, I'm criticized when I don't, so I constantly feel guilty whether I go or don't go. I'm trying to figure EVERYTHING out, but I don't know what to do or how to feel and whenever I make ANY decision or have any realization, I'm met with criticism from someone in my family telling me why I'm wrong. What should I do?

I found some churches near me posted YouTube videos of their services or live streamed them. I watched a year's worth of sermons from one church in my den as I liked the pastor. They have community events at some churches like monthly pot luck suppers, church picnics and pancake breakfasts. It helps the lonely and the sociable. As a teenager, I went with a church youth group to visit old people in a nursing home. During December we went caroling around a suburban neighborhood. I have not seen or heard Christmas caroling in recent years. Once I took a course in the New Testament Gospels. I have the course textbook. The binding is falling apart, but it is kept: "Gospel Parallels - A Synopsis of the First Three Gospels, RSV 1952." I also searched for other study guides, learned Biblical Archaeology and studied Biblical geography. It is up to you to find what church or schedule you are comfortable with.

 

[Meowzltov]

Hey everyone. I'm pretty new to this thread, so I'm sorry in advance for such a heavy question, but I think insights from other Christians might really help and somewhat calm the storm inside me.

I'm in a bit of a tough spot in my faith and I'm not really sure how to handle it. I don't have a lot of Christians in my life, so it's hard to know to to turn to in times of trial. This might be a longer post, so I'll probably post a tl;dr version at the end for those who don't want to/don't have the time to read it all.

I was born and raised Catholic, and considered myself a Catholic for most of my life. I was baptized and confirmed into the Catholic church, and went to church every Sunday. However, I never took my faith very seriously. Until a few years ago, I didn't even own a Bible, I didn't pray on a regular basis, and I basically just went through the motions of a Catholic life without really committing myself to God and entrusting my salvation to Jesus.

I've made some changes since then. About the time I started University, I began realizing the need for Christ to be an active part of my life, and to guide me. It was a turning point in my faith, and I was completely invested, as "new Christians" usually are. It would still rise and fall from time to time, but I've kept true to my beliefs and to God. I now pray on a regular basis, and am trying to keep in the habit of reading my Bible consistently.

Here's where the actual problem starts. I don't want to be a Catholic anymore. I'm still a Christian, but I consider myself more non-denominational, because I don't know which denomination will best fit what I've learned and what I beleive. Here are my main issues with the Catholic church:

1. We pray to saints. I know we're not using them as idles, but rather as mediators, but Jesus is the only mediator between Man and God. The Bible says this in 1 Timothy 2:5 " For there is one God, and there is one mediator between God and men, the man Christ Jesus". I don't believe that there is any benefit from praying to Saints. I don't if I'd call it sacrilegious, as that's a bit far, but it feels like a wasted prayer. We're only supposed to pray to God our Father and Jesus Christ as our mediator with the Father, since they're one in the same.

2. Many Catholics believe in purgatory. We don't talk about purgatory in church very often, but apparently it's still an accepted belief in the Catholic church. The need for purgatory, or a place of repentance would make Jesus' death meaningless, because it would mean that his death did not cleanse us of our sins and make us righteous in the eyes of God.

3. The Catholic church believes that confession is necessary. If you want to confess, go for it. It's good to confess your sins, but the Catholic church seems to promote that as the only way to be forgiven. I believe we can confess to God directly and He will still hear us. Also, Catholics priests give us penance to complete, like saying 8 Hail Marys. I find that wrong because it's praying to someone other than God, but also doesn't make anyone reflect on their sins or correctional actions. If you've sinned against someone, you should make it right with that person, and if you've sinned against God, make it right with God. Something about just saying the prayer 8 times and hope that makes it all okay is misguided to me, like there doesn't have to be real repentance involved. It certainly can and should be, and I'm sure many Catholics do take a confessional practice very seriously, but going through the motions is a possibility without much reflection.

So, those are a few reasons I'm distancing myself from Catholicism. I live in a house where my religion is a bit unsupported. My father is agnostic and very cynical about the existence of God. He believes in something greater than us, but not necessarily God. My mother is a non-practicing "paper Catholic". Like me, she was born and raised Catholic, she went through the motions and she still considers herself Catholic. However, she doesn't go to church, never reads the Bible, and the title seems to be all that matters. Please be clear that I'm not trying to put down my mother, but outlining the environment in which I live. My boyfriend of a year and a half is Baptist. I've been to his church and I really like it there. It's always very lively and people are much more friendly and social than my church, where people find their usual spot sit down, and then leave when mass is over. His entire family is Baptist and it's a very supportive environment. He can talk to his parents about religion, and discuss it without starting an argument or debate, and I want that so badly, but it's something that I don't have in my home environment. Being with him and his family has really helped me grow in my faith and explore other denominations and their practices, and I've never had the opportunity to do that before.

Ever since I began practicing my faith a few years back, my Mother has been asking why I became such a "Bible Thumper". If I ever do or say something that she doesn't approve of, she'll say that I'm not a good Christian like I pretend to be. Now that I'm trying to switch denominations, she hates it. The way she sees it, if I'm born and raised Catholic, I should always be Catholic, no matter what, don't even question it. She refuses to question anything and thinks it's wrong to do so, and she doesn't want me to be anything but Catholic. She thinks that my idea on changing denominations is because I'm piggybacking off someone else's faith, but I'm actually learning and growing in my own decisions.

I still technically belong to a Catholic church, but my boyfriend and I are looking into a new church. We've visited an Anglican church, next week we're going to a Baptist church, and we're also willing to look at Lutheran churches as a possibility. We're researching these denominations together and we're trying to find a good fit for both of us.

Today I didn't go to church. My boyfriend is working so we couldn't go together, and I was physically exhausted and wanted the extra sleep before I work this afternoon. I realize that it isn't a great or valid reason for missing church, but I took time to pray to God and ask him to help me get my faith in order and guide me in my faith journey.

My Oma (grandmother) who usually goes to church with me, since my parents don't go anymore, was criticizing me after she went to church. She was calling me lazy for not going without any good reason besides wanting extra sleep, and telling me that again, I'm not a good Christian and can't "pretend" that I'm serious about my faith. I told her that I'm still reading my Bible, but she said that doesn't matter at all because I'm not receiving the Eucharist, so obviously I'm not a very good Christian.

When I do go to the Catholic church however, my mother will tell me that I'm a hypocrite because I say I'm not a Catholic but still go to a Catholic church. Because I'm baptized and confirmed as a Catholic, my Oma says that I am legally a Catholic, and unless I'm baptized into another church, I will still be a Catholic and my mother absolutely hates the idea of me getting re-baptized as anything else, even though I feel like a second baptism and a new start with Christ would be a good thing. So now I'm here. I feel guilty for missing church, but I'm still not sure if I should still go to that church.

Tl;dr I'm SO torn because I don't want to be a Catholic anymore, but I don't know which Christian denomination I want to commit to yet. I live in a home without any spiritual support, and my mother hates that I want to be any other denomination, so she puts me down based on that. I'm trying to find a new church with my boyfriend, but we haven't made any final decisions yet. I'm criticized when I go to our family (Catholic) church, I'm criticized when I don't, so I constantly feel guilty whether I go or don't go. I'm trying to figure EVERYTHING out, but I don't know what to do or how to feel and whenever I make ANY decision or have any realization, I'm met with criticism from someone in my family telling me why I'm wrong. What should I do?

First of all, I want to say it's absolutely wonderful that at last you are developing an intimate relationship with our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ! It's life altering, isn't it?! This is a very good thing to have happened.

However, I'm so sorry that you have stayed in the Catholic Church for so long without paying attention. I feel just awful that you are jumping ship without really knowing what you are leaving. I teach confirmation, and I see kids who basically "endure" the class time instead of trying to learn to know Christ. They will probably go through confirmation because their parents will pressure them to do so, and it will be a sacrilege because they have no idea what they are doing, and are in no way prepared to live their lives as Christians. In your case also, I am reading a lot of ignorance of basic Catholicism, and I'll try to deal with your misconceptions in a moment. But first let me say that my heart is breaking that you want to leave the Church without even knowing what she teaches!!!!! You have to admit, that's not very fair.

I'm not going to say to stop learning about other churches (I myself know a great deal about the various denominations), but I WOULD say to you, don't leave Catholicism before you know what you are leaving, and you have a lot of homework to do. I would start with attending a basic RCIA class -- and that's just for the foundation. You need to read the Catechism, and become familiar with that. And you need to read the Bible, since the Church believes everything that is taught in the Bible. If you have questions, make appointments with your parish priest, or find a mentor in the church that you can run things by. We have a forum in here called One Bread One Body (OBOB) where folks would be happy to discuss things with you.

The Catholic Church agrees that Christ is supposed to be the central part of your life, not Mary, not the saints, not the Pope. We need an deeply intimate relationship with Christ. We get that through developing our prayer life, reading the Bible, meditating on Christ, and receiving the Eucharist. It sounds like you are working on this at last, and I am so happy for you! But don't give up the Eucharist part--it all works together.

Let's look at some of your issues.

1. The Saints are part of the Body. There is only one Body of Christ. It's not like there is one Body here on earth and a second Body up in heaven. The entire Body shares joys and sorrows. And we pray for one another. In fact, we are commanded to pray for one another, and we are told how worthwhile this is. "Therefore ... pray for each other so that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous person is powerful and effective." James 5:16 This is called intercession. We intercede for each other. I intercede for you. YOu intercede for me. The saints intercede for us, praying for us to the Father through Christ. And none of it competes with Christ's mediation.

2. Purgatory was part of Jewish belief. Every time Christ mentioned Gehenna, he was speaking of Purgatory. In Judaism, the dead in Gehenna are prayed for, and they are expected to resurrect for the World to Come. Purgatory is also written about by Paul in 1 Corinthians 3:10-15.

10 By the grace God has given me, I laid a foundation as a wise builder, and someone else is building on it. But each one should build with care. 11 For no one can lay any foundation other than the one already laid, which is Jesus Christ. 12 If anyone builds on this foundation using gold, silver, costly stones, wood, hay or straw, 13 their work will be shown for what it is, because the Day will bring it to light. It will be revealed with fire, and the fire will test the quality of each person’s work. 14 If what has been built survives, the builder will receive a reward. 15 If it is burned up, the builder will suffer loss but yet will be saved—even though only as one escaping through the flames.​

We also know that Purgatory, or rather Purgation, is necessary, because God requires perfection in addition to forgiveness. "Be ye perfect even as your Father in heaven is perfect." Matthew 5:48 Who is perfect in this life???? So what is left unfinished upon death, must be finished after death. Now here is where your catechesis fell down. PURGATORY DOES NOT WORK OFF SINS OR EARN HEAVEN. Only those who are already forgiven and going to heaven go to purgatory. Purgatory is the place for purification for the saved.

3. The Catholic Church believes that confession is necessary because Scripture commands it. "Therefore confess your sins one to another." James 5:16 It is written this way because in the Early Church, confession was said out loud before the entire congregation, and penance was meted out before all. It was all very public for a long time. But there was a problem when it was done this way: GOSSIP. People's lives were destroyed by gossip. So finally the Church changed the format to a private confession with the presbyter/priest.

3.1 Confession is not the only way to be forgiven. A pure act of contrition will do. The problem is that most of us don't manage to do a pure act of contrition. How many of us have the heart of David when he wrote Psalm 51?

3.2 There are those who grow up in ignorance, brainwashed to ignore scripture and never confess aloud. God grants them mercy in their ignorance--this is how Protestants can be forgiven. But don't you know better??????

3.3 Remember, too, that confession is only necessary for what Scripture calls "a sin unto death." 1 Peter 1:16

3.4 Protestant Churches are disobeying Scripture because they ONLY "confess" directly to God instead of to another.

I'm so sorry you are living in an unsupporting home. That must be pretty rough for you. I find it very telling that it is your mother, the "paper Catholic" that is accusing you of being a hypocrite for continuing to go to Mass. Your Oma, who is the one walking the walk, welcomes you. And so do all practicing Catholics. You will always be a Catholic, part of our family. If you have not committed any mortal sins, you are welcome to Eucharist. If you have committed a mortal sin, a priest waits for you in the confessional to help you come home.

I agree that you should absolutely not get re-baptized, since it is a VIOLATION of scripture: "One Lord, one faith, one baptism." Ephesians 4:5 It's not what YOU think is a nice idea; it's what GOD says is the right thing.

I am glad that you are drawing near to Christ for the first time. This is wonderful. But let's make sure we do this not only with all our heart, but with all our mind. Be thoughtful. Ask questions. Listen to answers. Learn. Go slow.

In Him

OH

 

[Goodbook]

Fellowship can be anywhere as long as its with other christians and you dont give up meeting together. This is so you can be encourgaed and encoruage each other.

When people say they dont go to church but they are christian well I wonder are they just avoiding other christians? Are we that bad??? Church is wherever two or three are gathered in His name.

Also, if you have more than three christians, it helps with the harmony. I mean, you can have an alto, a soprano, a bass AND a tenor. Plus...when having the lords supper you get more variety in food.

 

[Sketcher]

3.4 Protestant Churches are disobeying Scripture because they ONLY "confess" directly to God instead of to another.

Wrong.

We always confess to God, who is always the most important one to confess to, when going by the pattern of Scripture. We teach that if you have sinned against another, you should also confess to that person. We teach that you should have someone who is trustworthy that you can confess other sins to. Small groups have a tradition of a "four walls rule" - what is confessed to the group doesn't leave the group.

 

[Daniel Marsh]

Hey everyone. I'm pretty new to this thread, so I'm sorry in advance for such a heavy question, but I think insights from other Christians might really help and somewhat calm the storm inside me.

I'm in a bit of a tough spot in my faith and I'm not really sure how to handle it. I don't have a lot of Christians in my life, so it's hard to know to to turn to in times of trial. This might be a longer post, so I'll probably post a tl;dr version at the end for those who don't want to/don't have the time to read it all.

I was born and raised Catholic, and considered myself a Catholic for most of my life. I was baptized and confirmed into the Catholic church, and went to church every Sunday. However, I never took my faith very seriously. Until a few years ago, I didn't even own a Bible, I didn't pray on a regular basis, and I basically just went through the motions of a Catholic life without really committing myself to God and entrusting my salvation to Jesus.

I've made some changes since then. About the time I started University, I began realizing the need for Christ to be an active part of my life, and to guide me. It was a turning point in my faith, and I was completely invested, as "new Christians" usually are. It would still rise and fall from time to time, but I've kept true to my beliefs and to God. I now pray on a regular basis, and am trying to keep in the habit of reading my Bible consistently.

Here's where the actual problem starts. I don't want to be a Catholic anymore. I'm still a Christian, but I consider myself more non-denominational, because I don't know which denomination will best fit what I've learned and what I beleive. Here are my main issues with the Catholic church:

1. We pray to saints. I know we're not using them as idles, but rather as mediators, but Jesus is the only mediator between Man and God. The Bible says this in 1 Timothy 2:5 " For there is one God, and there is one mediator between God and men, the man Christ Jesus". I don't believe that there is any benefit from praying to Saints. I don't if I'd call it sacrilegious, as that's a bit far, but it feels like a wasted prayer. We're only supposed to pray to God our Father and Jesus Christ as our mediator with the Father, since they're one in the same.

2. Many Catholics believe in purgatory. We don't talk about purgatory in church very often, but apparently it's still an accepted belief in the Catholic church. The need for purgatory, or a place of repentance would make Jesus' death meaningless, because it would mean that his death did not cleanse us of our sins and make us righteous in the eyes of God.

3. The Catholic church believes that confession is necessary. If you want to confess, go for it. It's good to confess your sins, but the Catholic church seems to promote that as the only way to be forgiven. I believe we can confess to God directly and He will still hear us. Also, Catholics priests give us penance to complete, like saying 8 Hail Marys. I find that wrong because it's praying to someone other than God, but also doesn't make anyone reflect on their sins or correctional actions. If you've sinned against someone, you should make it right with that person, and if you've sinned against God, make it right with God. Something about just saying the prayer 8 times and hope that makes it all okay is misguided to me, like there doesn't have to be real repentance involved. It certainly can and should be, and I'm sure many Catholics do take a confessional practice very seriously, but going through the motions is a possibility without much reflection.

So, those are a few reasons I'm distancing myself from Catholicism. I live in a house where my religion is a bit unsupported. My father is agnostic and very cynical about the existence of God. He believes in something greater than us, but not necessarily God. My mother is a non-practicing "paper Catholic". Like me, she was born and raised Catholic, she went through the motions and she still considers herself Catholic. However, she doesn't go to church, never reads the Bible, and the title seems to be all that matters. Please be clear that I'm not trying to put down my mother, but outlining the environment in which I live. My boyfriend of a year and a half is Baptist. I've been to his church and I really like it there. It's always very lively and people are much more friendly and social than my church, where people find their usual spot sit down, and then leave when mass is over. His entire family is Baptist and it's a very supportive environment. He can talk to his parents about religion, and discuss it without starting an argument or debate, and I want that so badly, but it's something that I don't have in my home environment. Being with him and his family has really helped me grow in my faith and explore other denominations and their practices, and I've never had the opportunity to do that before.

Ever since I began practicing my faith a few years back, my Mother has been asking why I became such a "Bible Thumper". If I ever do or say something that she doesn't approve of, she'll say that I'm not a good Christian like I pretend to be. Now that I'm trying to switch denominations, she hates it. The way she sees it, if I'm born and raised Catholic, I should always be Catholic, no matter what, don't even question it. She refuses to question anything and thinks it's wrong to do so, and she doesn't want me to be anything but Catholic. She thinks that my idea on changing denominations is because I'm piggybacking off someone else's faith, but I'm actually learning and growing in my own decisions.

I still technically belong to a Catholic church, but my boyfriend and I are looking into a new church. We've visited an Anglican church, next week we're going to a Baptist church, and we're also willing to look at Lutheran churches as a possibility. We're researching these denominations together and we're trying to find a good fit for both of us.

Today I didn't go to church. My boyfriend is working so we couldn't go together, and I was physically exhausted and wanted the extra sleep before I work this afternoon. I realize that it isn't a great or valid reason for missing church, but I took time to pray to God and ask him to help me get my faith in order and guide me in my faith journey.

My Oma (grandmother) who usually goes to church with me, since my parents don't go anymore, was criticizing me after she went to church. She was calling me lazy for not going without any good reason besides wanting extra sleep, and telling me that again, I'm not a good Christian and can't "pretend" that I'm serious about my faith. I told her that I'm still reading my Bible, but she said that doesn't matter at all because I'm not receiving the Eucharist, so obviously I'm not a very good Christian.

When I do go to the Catholic church however, my mother will tell me that I'm a hypocrite because I say I'm not a Catholic but still go to a Catholic church. Because I'm baptized and confirmed as a Catholic, my Oma says that I am legally a Catholic, and unless I'm baptized into another church, I will still be a Catholic and my mother absolutely hates the idea of me getting re-baptized as anything else, even though I feel like a second baptism and a new start with Christ would be a good thing. So now I'm here. I feel guilty for missing church, but I'm still not sure if I should still go to that church.

Tl;dr I'm SO torn because I don't want to be a Catholic anymore, but I don't know which Christian denomination I want to commit to yet. I live in a home without any spiritual support, and my mother hates that I want to be any other denomination, so she puts me down based on that. I'm trying to find a new church with my boyfriend, but we haven't made any final decisions yet. I'm criticized when I go to our family (Catholic) church, I'm criticized when I don't, so I constantly feel guilty whether I go or don't go. I'm trying to figure EVERYTHING out, but I don't know what to do or how to feel and whenever I make ANY decision or have any realization, I'm met with criticism from someone in my family telling me why I'm wrong. What should I do?

Hi read 1 Timothy 2 and Hebrews chapters 7 through 10 in context concerning mediator thing.

Concerning denominations, check the local Library for a copy of Mead's Handbook of Denominations.

I am going to suggest Free Methodist because they are more understanding and tolerable to Catholics.
They speak to the person of Jesus and not argue doctrine from misinformation like you have in the mediator thing. Concerning your Mother, get a copy of below to listen to with her and Grandma.

Truth and Life Dramatized Audio Bible
LIGHTHOUSE CATHOLIC MEDIA

The "Truth and Life Dramatized Audio Bible" is a brilliantly-recorded production of the Revised Standard Version (Catholic Edition) of the New Testament. Endorsed with an Imprimatur from the Vatican, "Truth and Life" is truly the first of its kind. This 18-CD, 22-hour set is narrated by a star-studded cast and includes beautiful music and sound effects which help make Scripture come alive.

Looking for a digital version of the Audio New Testament? Download the FREE Catholic Study Bible App featuring the Truth and Life Audio, the full text of the RSV-CE Bible, Ignatius Press Study Content, and other amazing content!
https://www.lighthousecatholicmedia.org/store/title/truth-and-life-dramatized-audio-bible

 

[SLB]

I'm SO torn because I don't want to be a Catholic anymore, but I don't know which Christian denomination I want to commit to yet. I live in a home without any spiritual support, and my mother hates that I want to be any other denomination, so she puts me down based on that. I'm trying to find a new church with my boyfriend, but we haven't made any final decisions yet. I'm criticized when I go to our family (Catholic) church, I'm criticized when I don't, so I constantly feel guilty whether I go or don't go. I'm trying to figure EVERYTHING out, but I don't know what to do or how to feel and whenever I make ANY decision or have any realization, I'm met with criticism from someone in my family telling me why I'm wrong. What should I do?

It looks like you're already doing what needs to be done. You're reading your Bible, checking out other churches and examining, what you believe, and they believe, in light of the scriptures. That's all good. Some times the practicality of how to get to the church you'd like to attend, just doesn't seem to be a workable option.

Some years ago I was looking for a new home church and I visited one church and it was just like the Holy Spirit said "home". I didn't drive, or have a car, at the time and this church was on the other side of the city with no easily connecting bus routes. I prayed about it. On Monday, when I got on the bus to work, I sat reading my Bible and a lady sat down beside me and noticed what I was reading. She started a conversation and mentioned that she and her husband attended the very same church I went to on Sunday and since they had to go by my place anyway, would I like them to pick me up and take me to church! God will find a way to direct you to the church He wants you to attend and will make it possible for you to get there.

Whatever decision you make, make sure it's the right decision for you. Attending your boyfriend's church means you have someone to introduce you to other people and it makes it easier to fit in, but a boyfriend is not yet a husband and you need to make sure the church you attend is right for you, giving you the kind of fellowship and the kind of teaching you need. No one but God knows the future and this boyfriend may not be there long term.

Your mother's attitude is probably a result of her lack of knowledge about other denominations. She may have been raised to believe that anything not Catholic is heretical and so she wants you to stay with what she knows and is sure of. Without doing the kind of Bible reading and studying for herself like you have, she may not see any problems with Catholic teaching. If she has a problem with you missing church one Sunday, you might remind her that Jesus said in Mark 2:27 And he said unto them, The sabbath was made for man, and not man for the sabbath.

Keep looking for the church God wants to plant you in and keep praying about it. God will show you the way

 

[FireDragon76]

I teach confirmation, and I see kids who basically "endure" the class time instead of trying to learn to know Christ. They will probably go through confirmation because their parents will pressure them to do so, and it will be a sacrilege because they have no idea what they are doing, and are in no way prepared to live their lives as Christians.

As a Methodist that was my experience of confirmation. It's usually done because there is nominalism going on and people just want to get this "rite of passage" over with. It can lead to false assurance that they've internalized things when they haven't, and consequently many mainline churches lose people at around the same age when people grow up and "think for themselves". Many leave church altogether, because they have never really owned the faith for themselves and have never been taught it is important to do so.

The Catholic Church agrees that Christ is supposed to be the central part of your life, not Mary, not the saints, not the Pope.

It's important to separate out polemics from truth. Baptists in particular are full of this stuff. Lutherans have much the same experience as Catholics here: being targeted by ignorant sheep-stealers who want to convince us that our sacramental faith is insufficient.