Hi
I am in my fifties and have lived a very full life, I am new to faith having finally admitted to myself that my recovery from addiction ( alcohol ) is not something I alone can achieve. Given that I have been given honest advice from close friends on how best undertake my search for a Church where I might belong. As a start I have been visiting local churches in Ottawa, ON, Canada. A United Church of Canada, an Anglican Church and a church which is part of the Christian and Missionary Alliance of Canada ( has US branches as well). My main source of conflict is my political and social views, I am sure this is a familiar issue. For the best part of my adult life I rejected any Church that restricted women, were anti abortion or same sex marriage. Now I appreciate these three issues are very important to people. The dumb things is they are not really that important to me...I used them as an excuse to ignore the good, loving, caring aspects of Churches. Almost like I put blinkers on and stopped myself from going any further. If anyone knows an alcoholic or is one, they will recognise this child like characteristic that is part of our make up. Any excuse to deny is grasped with amazing veracity.
So often the advice is to find a congregation that I enjoy, find a pastor/Minister who speaks a language I understand, find a Church that will help me on my journey. To follow my heart ( the issue with my heart is that it is still raw from being exposed recently to the real me and I am learning to live an honest, caring , productive life). Prior to going into any of the Churches above I would have laid best on the United Church being my preference as I connect their social stances with mine ( or what I thought were mine), however to be honest the Church I have enjoyed the most is the CMA church and I know from their literature and from talking to people at the Church including the pastor that they do have opinions that previously I would have walked away from. So my internal turmoil is that I am not directly affected by the three social issues listed above BUT they were the sticking points in my formative years that I believed then. I don't know what I believe now. I am still trying to work all of this out, part of me feels I am wrong to turn my back on my former ideas, BUT these opinions were those of a drunk who was totally self absorbed and frankly would not have lifted a hand to help anyone unless there was something in it for me. I am not that person anymore. Anyhow, thanks for reading this
If anyone has any advice I would welcome it, please don't quote scripture if possible. I really don't understand it enough to interpret it properly, something I intend to change but that will take time .
I am in my fifties and have lived a very full life, I am new to faith having finally admitted to myself that my recovery from addiction ( alcohol ) is not something I alone can achieve. Given that I have been given honest advice from close friends on how best undertake my search for a Church where I might belong. As a start I have been visiting local churches in Ottawa, ON, Canada. A United Church of Canada, an Anglican Church and a church which is part of the Christian and Missionary Alliance of Canada ( has US branches as well). My main source of conflict is my political and social views, I am sure this is a familiar issue. For the best part of my adult life I rejected any Church that restricted women, were anti abortion or same sex marriage. Now I appreciate these three issues are very important to people. The dumb things is they are not really that important to me...I used them as an excuse to ignore the good, loving, caring aspects of Churches. Almost like I put blinkers on and stopped myself from going any further. If anyone knows an alcoholic or is one, they will recognise this child like characteristic that is part of our make up. Any excuse to deny is grasped with amazing veracity.
So often the advice is to find a congregation that I enjoy, find a pastor/Minister who speaks a language I understand, find a Church that will help me on my journey. To follow my heart ( the issue with my heart is that it is still raw from being exposed recently to the real me and I am learning to live an honest, caring , productive life). Prior to going into any of the Churches above I would have laid best on the United Church being my preference as I connect their social stances with mine ( or what I thought were mine), however to be honest the Church I have enjoyed the most is the CMA church and I know from their literature and from talking to people at the Church including the pastor that they do have opinions that previously I would have walked away from. So my internal turmoil is that I am not directly affected by the three social issues listed above BUT they were the sticking points in my formative years that I believed then. I don't know what I believe now. I am still trying to work all of this out, part of me feels I am wrong to turn my back on my former ideas, BUT these opinions were those of a drunk who was totally self absorbed and frankly would not have lifted a hand to help anyone unless there was something in it for me. I am not that person anymore. Anyhow, thanks for reading this
If anyone has any advice I would welcome it, please don't quote scripture if possible. I really don't understand it enough to interpret it properly, something I intend to change but that will take time .