Would you marry a woman who was a former stripper or X-rated star if she turned into a Christian ?

[timothyu]

Has anybody considered why these gals may be in these professions in the first place? It's not like the world is set up to readily given them other options. Sure there may be some that see sex as no big deal and a route to entrepreneurial success, but I'll bet most are coerced either by oppressors or by circumstances involving financial blackmail (including loans), food and shelter, especially for dependants. There are bad seeds in very walk of life (not just stripping or prostitution which aren't even the same level) but there are also those with little or no choice in the matter. It would depend on their attitudes/character, not just circumstance.

 

[Ignatius the Kiwi]

No. Decisions have consequences and living life as a pornstar will make you repellant to most men. Men are under no obligation to marry promiscuous women, even if they have repented.

 

[timothyu]

Men are under no obligation to marry promiscuous women, even if they have repented.

How about the men who had no problem paying her?

 

[Ignatius the Kiwi]

How about the men who had no problem paying her?

They are facing the consequences of their actions as well. Porn addiction is very real and has affected a good portion of guys (if not most) negatively.

Any man who actually pays these online
Promiscuous women (i would use a harsher word) is already being duped out of his money. They look pathetic to women.

Do we as Christians have to ignore the pasts of our partners so long as they repented? Regardless of how a man or woman feels?

 

[Paidiske]

I mean don’t Godly women reject Christian men for reasons more minimal than this why can’t men do the same ?

Well, nobody's saying that you can't. Obviously you can. I think what we're discussing is the ethics of basically defining someone by one aspect of their history, which Christianity has generally seen as questionable.

For what it's worth - as someone who's brought her own complicated history and trauma into a marriage - I think it's fair enough to say that a history can bring challenges, and to ask yourself if you personally feel well equipped to deal with those challenges. The answer may be no.

I think it's more problematic to frame the question in terms of the worth or value of a prospective partner. There's a vein of contempt that runs through these discussions which is really quite disturbing.

 

[Divide]

(not just stripping or prostitution which aren't even the same level)

That was my mistake. I dated a dancer for about a year. It didn't come out right away that she was a dancer. She didn't strip just danced in bikini, pantyhose and high heels. But she had the same mentality. She'd break up with me on Friday and be back monday.

She was good at hiding it. Yeah, that's the girl I want to marry, lol.

 

[Divide]

There's a vein of contempt that runs through these discussions which is really quite disturbing.

I hope you don't mean me. But the fact is that the difference in the women who have and have not used that for a money source is very disturbing. A big difference. But still it's just a prefrence or wisdom whatever you want to call it.

 

[Ignatius the Kiwi]

Well, nobody's saying that you can't. Obviously you can. I think what we're discussing is the ethics of basically defining someone by one aspect of their history, which Christianity has generally seen as questionable.

For what it's worth - as someone who's brought her own complicated history and trauma into a marriage - I think it's fair enough to say that a history can bring challenges, and to ask yourself if you personally feel well equipped to deal with those challenges. The answer may be no.

I think it's more problematic to frame the question in terms of the worth or value of a prospective partner. There's a vein of contempt that runs through these discussions which is really quite disturbing.

When it comes to marriage this one aspect of life has always mattered and is going to be a serious barrier to a Christian marriage for anyone engaged in it.

Promiscuity has never been something men in particular value in a woman they're considering marrying. Why would it?

 

[RDKirk]

It's simple but not easy.

But this is something I know: God forgives us to the extent we forgive others. Jesus was pretty clear about that more than once. If we sin and hope that God will fully reinstate us when we repent, then we must be willing to fully reinstate others when they repent.

 

[Paidiske]

Promiscuity has never been something men in particular value in a woman they're considering marrying. Why would it?

Nobody's arguing that we should value promiscuity. What I was arguing was that framing the question of a person's sexual past as a matter of the value or worth of that person is rather degrading.

 

[QuestionQuest74]

That was my mistake. I dated a dancer for about a year. It didn't come out right away that she was a dancer. She didn't strip just danced in bikini, pantyhose and high heels. But she had the same mentality. She'd break up with me on Friday and be back monday.

She was good at hiding it. Yeah, that's the girl I want to marry, lol.

What mentality she had ?

 

[timothyu]

They are facing the consequences of their actions as well.

So you don't think they already accept each other for who they are or could do in the future for who they were? Pretty hard to condemn someone is you were a co-conspirator.

 

[Ignatius the Kiwi]

So you don't think they already accept each other for who they are or could do in the future for who they were? Pretty hard to condemn someone is you were a co-conspirator.

No, because that relativistises all sin as equal. A guy who is a virgin but has looked at porn doesn't have to consider marriage to a pornstar, mainly because the circumstances are different.

A woman doesn't have to marry a man who was a chronic cheater or womanizer. The gospel should not be used as a weapon to shame those who haven't committed the sin.

 

[timothyu]

No, because that relativistises all sin as equal. A guy who is a virgin but has looked at inappropriate content doesn't have to consider marriage to a inappropriate contentstar, mainly because the circumstances are different.

A woman doesn't have to marry a man who was a chronic cheater or womanizer. The gospel should not be used as a weapon to shame those who haven't committed the sin.

Ok you expanded on my original example but yes I agree with what you say. To go a step further, Christians especially are obligated to do nothing with those who may be taking advantage, simply because they believe we must care for all as self so they can manipulate that to their advantage.

 

[Sabertooth]

I generally agree with what you're saying but if you've ever been graced enough to be able to marry an upper class lady. I don't mean financially, I mean one who is actually humble in spirit.

An ex-SW could have issues that are contentious to marriage, but if those have been resolved, her past is no disqualification. (I have never been a SW, but it holds true for any act of promiscuity. I am speaking from personal experience.)

 

[2PhiloVoid]

I mean don’t Godly women reject Christian men for reasons more minimal than this why can’t men do the same ?

We can reject people all we want. There's no requirement that a man 'must' choose a particular person from a particular background and marry that person.

And in light of your OP, we're simply talking here about whether or not it's "ok" to marry a women with an "industry" experience. So, it is "ok" to do so if that is what you and she want to do, assuming you're both Christians.

 

[QuestionQuest74]

An ex-SW could have issues that are contentious to marriage, but if those have been resolved, her past is no disqualification. (I have never been a SW, but it holds true for any act of promiscuity. I am speaking from personal experience.)

What issues they would have that is contenous to marriage ?

 

[timothyu]

Is this a survey to test the acceptance for a 21st century version of I Love Lucy?

 

[Sabertooth]

What issues they would have that is contenous to marriage ?

1. Sexual sin often brings with it deliverance issues.*
2. That person (either gender) could continue to struggle with promiscuity.**
3. Chronic STDs could be an issue.

If those are resolved, her sexual past is otherwise negligible.

*Deliverance is not an allowed topic here. Visit a church that has a deliverance ministry, if you would like to explore that further.
**I fail to see how the spiritual consequences of sex work differ from those of garden-variety sexual promiscuity...

 

[Ignatius the Kiwi]

Nobody's arguing that we should value promiscuity. What I was arguing was that framing the question of a person's sexual past as a matter of the value or worth of that person is rather degrading.

Is sexual promiscuity a positive or negative aspect we seek out in a partner as Christians?