Would or should a person leave a church under some circumstances or at least tell them privately?

[Lik3]

I wrote them in the title to mean a fellow church member, especially one that she or she knows, like a friend or relative. Say a person has been a loyal member of a church and they see or find something they disagree with? Would you privately tell a minister that they don't preach enough about salvation or if there is other doctrine you don't agree with? What would you do to a brother or sister in Christ, including a pastor, deacon, or bishop who is rude or preaching a false doctrine?

I recall there was a division in the church I attended and we have had numerous pastors in the last few decades and one pastor even was a victim of a beat down by some of the members. (Of course, I was a kid and I may have remembered things differently. It was a shock to me however.) Would you confront the members privately, if they were relatives of yours who took part in the violence or would you (and the pastor) just leave the church altogether? There have been so much going on and while things have calmed down, there was a pastor that just up and left the church (they would have voted him out anyways) and another pastor who some of the members hated and the others liked who was also voted out of the church.

Because of this, some of the members left. In this scenario, did those members who left do the right thing? I assume that they became members of other churches, but church members like the rest of us are regular people too. Is leaving the church being this is true a big mistake or should they learn how to confront fellow church members without both members getting too angry or go out of line? I have written this because what should a believer do in some circumstances without being self-righteous. Because of all that has happened, and even though things have calmed down, I am concerned that this pastor may be voted out or just leave. Should I be?

 

[yeshuaslavejeff]

church members like the rest of us are regular people too.

What does this mean ?
Is it really true?

 

[Albion]

Because of this, some of the members left. In this scenario, did those members who left do the right thing?

I'd say so. There is something wrong with this congregation that cannot be easily remedied.

 

[Lik3]

Sure, yeshua. Maybe I didn't word it properly, but who among us haven't sinned?

I stand corrected. I was being redundant without realizing it. Anyways, what I meant to write was "church members are regular people who too are imperfect beings who have sinned." I think that just because one is a member of a church doesn't mean that we should not be so self-righteous (high and mighty without sin).

 

[yeshuaslavejeff]

Sure, yeshua. Maybe I didn't word it properly, but who among us haven't sinned?

I stand corrected. I was being redundant without realizing it. Anyways, what I meant to write was "church members are regular people who too are imperfect beings who have sinned." I think that just because one is a member of a church doesn't mean that we should not be so self-righteous (high and mighty without sin).

No worries on one hand.
Many many many problems on the other hand.

If a church becomes apostate (as written many are and will be),
then leave it -
"come out of her MY PEOPLE" (i.e. don't stay if /when God says come out).

 

[seeking.IAM]

I believe Christians should attach themselves to a body that nurtures their faith and provides them with meaningful worship opportunity. Sometimes, but not always, one needs to leave a church to which they are attached to find that.

I believe the responsible thing to do is to let others know about that thing that causes one's dissatisfaction. Doing so gives them opportunity to fix it, should they agree your concerns have validity. If they do not agree, I think it is better that one finds a suitable body with which to worship rather than staying in a place they are miserable out of some sense of obligation.

I left a church after being a member and occupying leadership positions for over 20 years. It was hard to do, but it was the best thing I ever did to re-vitalize my Christian walk. I have no regrets.

 

[Doug Melven]

I have never heard of voting a pastor out of a church.
Voting one in, yes.

If my pastor preaches anything I think is not right, I will talk with him privately.
In front of everyone I will be totally supportive. But when I talk privately I state what Scripture shows and we can have a discussion.
As long as the fundamentals are agreed upon, the rest is small stuff, and we can agree to disagree.
For my church the fundamentals are those things pertaining to salvation.


And any candidate for pastor should have already been tested to ascertain what he believes.
The church must have a clear doctrinal statement, and any candidate must be in line with this doctrinal statement.
Doing those things would solve a lot of problems.

 

[Tolworth John]

Say a person has been a loyal member of a church and they see or find something they disagree with? Would you privately tell a minister that they don't preach enough about salvation or if there is other doctrine you don't agree with? What would you do to a brother or sister in Christ, including a pastor, deacon, or bishop who is rude or preaching a false doctrine?

If you are a church member, one should always seek to talk with that person privatly. Partly to clarify what it is they are preaching/believe and partly so any remonstration on ones part is delivered privately.
Ditto with rude/abusive behaviour.

If they reject out of hand what you are saying, present it to what ever form of church government there is.
If they won't touch the problem resign your membership and explain in the letter of resignation why you are leaving. Do ensure that every member of the governing body/council gets a copy of your letter.

I can't comment on the behaviour of the church you mentioned, except to say don't join such a church.

 

[Basil the Great]

It is a personal decision for each individual Christian. One may or may not wish to give an explanation, based upon the particular circumstances.

 

[yeshuaslavejeff]

I left a church after being a member and occupying leadership positions for over 20 years. It was hard to do, but it was the best thing I ever did to re-vitalize my Christian walk. I have no regrets.

COOL! FREEDOM IN CHRIST>
Just think how it would be if everyone >>

should have already been tested

tested and was tested in the body of Christ so there would not be errors and heresies continuing and promoted even... ... ....

When people find out that they themselves can read the Bible with others, and agree on God's Plan of Salvation, and kick out anyone who teaches heresy, IT IS WONDERFUL ! CLEAN ! HOLY ! (SET APART)

 

[Sola1517]

Say a person has been a loyal member of a church and they see or find something they disagree with?

Depends on what it is. Is it something immoral or unethical?

Would you privately tell a minister that they don't preach enough about salvation or if there is other doctrine you don't agree with?

Depends again, does that type of preaching appear mainstream? If I were you I might leave the denomination if that's the case.

What would you do to a brother or sister in Christ, including a pastor, deacon, or bishop who is rude or preaching a false doctrine?

I'd be honest with them. Are these things actually happening?

I recall there was a division in the church I attended and we have had numerous pastors in the last few decades and one pastor even was a victim of a beat down by some of the members. (Of course, I was a kid and I may have remembered things differently. It was a shock to me however.) Would you confront the members privately, if they were relatives of yours who took part in the violence or would you (and the pastor) just leave the church altogether? There have been so much going on and while things have calmed down, there was a pastor that just up and left the church (they would have voted him out anyways) and another pastor who some of the members hated and the others liked who was also voted out of the church.

Oh okay.

Because of this, some of the members left. In this scenario, did those members who left do the right thing? I assume that they became members of other churches, but church members like the rest of us are regular people too. Is leaving the church being this is true a big mistake or should they learn how to confront fellow church members without both members getting too angry or go out of line? I have written this because what should a believer do in some circumstances without being self-righteous. Because of all that has happened, and even though things have calmed down, I am concerned that this pastor may be voted out or just leave. Should I be?

I'd sit tight and see what happens.

 

[faroukfarouk]

Depends on what it is. Is it something immoral or unethical?

Depends again, does that type of preaching appear mainstream? If I were you I might leave the denomination if that's the case.

I'd be honest with them. Are these things actually happening?

Oh okay.

I'd sit tight and see what happens.

It's good to sort out problems keeping them within the local church.

 

[Sola1517]

It's good to sort out problems keeping them within the local church.

That's why I said sit tight at the end there.

 

[Albion]

My view was conditioned by the description given in the OP of a church that has had exceptional disputes and numerous confrontations...with no sign of an overall improvement in the situation.

While the advice--under normal circumstances--should probably be to speak privately with the appropriate person, etc., in the case being brought to our attention here, there is every indication that the problem is far gone beyond that point.

If this is accurate, leaving for another congregation would be advisable. It certainly would not be wrong to do.

 

[faroukfarouk]

That's why I said sit tight at the end there.

Well, good! There is a simplicity about New Testament church composition and activity; Acts 2.41-42 is a good guide.

 

[faroukfarouk]

I'd be honest with them. Are these things actually happening?

PS: Local elders do need to be approachable.

 

[Sola1517]

Well, good! There is a simplicity about New Testament church composition and activity; Acts 2.41-42 is a good guide.

I know Jesus talks about it in Matthew chapters 16 and 18.

 

[Sola1517]

I wrote them in the title to mean a fellow church member, especially one that she or she knows, like a friend or relative. Say a person has been a loyal member of a church and they see or find something they disagree with? Would you privately tell a minister that they don't preach enough about salvation or if there is other doctrine you don't agree with? What would you do to a brother or sister in Christ, including a pastor, deacon, or bishop who is rude or preaching a false doctrine?

I recall there was a division in the church I attended and we have had numerous pastors in the last few decades and one pastor even was a victim of a beat down by some of the members. (Of course, I was a kid and I may have remembered things differently. It was a shock to me however.) Would you confront the members privately, if they were relatives of yours who took part in the violence or would you (and the pastor) just leave the church altogether? There have been so much going on and while things have calmed down, there was a pastor that just up and left the church (they would have voted him out anyways) and another pastor who some of the members hated and the others liked who was also voted out of the church.

Because of this, some of the members left. In this scenario, did those members who left do the right thing? I assume that they became members of other churches, but church members like the rest of us are regular people too. Is leaving the church being this is true a big mistake or should they learn how to confront fellow church members without both members getting too angry or go out of line? I have written this because what should a believer do in some circumstances without being self-righteous. Because of all that has happened, and even though things have calmed down, I am concerned that this pastor may be voted out or just leave. Should I be?

I'll give you this link
https://www.9marks.org/article/church-discipline-primer/

 

[faroukfarouk]

I'll give you this link
https://www.9marks.org/article/church-discipline-primer/

Yes, there is a Biblical order of things in seeking to resolve difficulties.

 

[com7fy8]

What would you do to a brother or sister in Christ, including a pastor, deacon, or bishop who is rude or preaching a false doctrine?

First, if I have a relationship with communication with a person, I might offer what the person needs. Then either give the person a chance to keep growing, or bring it up with someone who is trusted by the church, and trust that person to take care of it.

one pastor even was a victim of a beat down by some of the members.

Do you mean they beat the person up? That's a crime, if they did. People like that possibly do not know God. If you have a major number of people who do not know God and do not know how to relate in love, you possibly do not have a functional church there. And I would not expect Christians to stay there. I'll offer more below.

Would you confront the members privately, if they were relatives of yours who took part in the violence or would you (and the pastor) just leave the church altogether?

I might go by if I have a rapport with the people. They could be unbelievers whom I am not required to evaluate and deal with. But even if they are not of God, still I might offer things if we have the ability to have a conversation. Also, ones might be getting convicted and they are bothered by how they fail. But if there is physical violence, this could mean those members are domestic abusers, also, and they could be very dangerous; so I would be careful about trying to talk with them.

another pastor who some of the members hated and the others liked who was also voted out of the church.

So, they have brought in a pastor who is not accepted by the whole church, possibly. Or, they thought the person was great, then ones changed their minds. I do think we need to have all Christians in a church in agreement > I mean people who obey God and are for real in love. Work things out with these people, in prayer, and do what you all agree on, together.

See who you trust, and talk with those people. Work things out with prayer and agreement. You can meet at homes, away from trouble makers, if you decide God wants you to stay. But I am sure you should have a number of mature example people who help you in a church, or else very likely you need to find who is an example leader >

"nor as being lords over those entrusted to you, but being examples to the flock." (1 Peter 5:3)

a pastor that just up and left the church (they would have voted him out anyways) and another pastor who some of the members hated and the others liked who was also voted out of the church.

This could mean your church does not know how to evaluate in prayer whom God has chosen to lead your church. With God, we can make reliable choices about whom we trust; so if we keep getting caught involved with wrong people, this is not the fault of those wrong people, if we can't tell the difference between a person of genuine love, versus a con artist or other evil or disqualified person. With Jesus, we can tell the difference about whom to trust and how God has called each one to be trusted.

did those members who left do the right thing?

Well, what if they are not Christians, but they have just gotten in a huff? Then, even if the church is wrong, they still are wrong, too.

But if ones who know God have left, this could be because God has moved them. But in case your church is bogus for being able to know whom to select as a pastor, then how come those people ever were there, in the first place . . . considering God could have led them to a church with example leadership and unified members?

I have written this because what should a believer do in some circumstances without being self-righteous.

So, this is good, how you know you need to not be self-righteous. But if people tempt you to be self-righteous, because of their wrong behavior and evil spiritedness . . . just don't give in to the temptation!!

And prayerfully evaluate if it really has been God who has had you go there. People can go where things are not right, as an evasion of what would be required if they were to go to a real church. They can point the finger at others, and not get the real correction they need, themselves.

Hebrews 12:4-11 talks about the correction which children of God are guaranteed to get with God. And you need example leaders to help you with this.