Would God take me back, and other questions.

[TessHopes]

I'll explain. Some time ago, I lost my best friend. His death was sad but not unexpected. At the time, I prayed God to care for him, and believed it would be so. As time went on, I was unable to accept the loss, and turned to God for help. Whatever I did, I could not shake the utterly desolate feeling of being completely alone. I cannot describe the blackness surrounding me. For the first time in my life, I had really REALLY needed God, and he was not there. The Christians I spoke to were patronising at best and nasty at worst. I could not keep my faith, and the only person who displayed any compassion at all was Buddhist. After a lot of tears, I decided God had abandoned me and I became Buddhist. Not having a God as such, and just looking inwards seemed so much better than having a God that would ignore me when in such great pain. I don't know, perhaps my anger prevented me from hearing Him but I looked for signs that He was with me and I saw none at the time, and it broke my heart.

Now years down the line, I realise I miss God. I've been empty. I want to ask him back into my life, but I don't know how. I feel I turned my back too long ago, and sinned too much and He won't want me back anyway. I did drugs, had sex without being married (although later married the man in question - I know it doesn't make it right), was intimate with another woman and much more. For most of the things I've done I am truly sorry, however some were just new experiences and although I may not want to repeat them I can't be sorry for what I learned from them.

I want to put the past behind me, but the Christians I speak to only lead me to think there is no place for me in Church. Having lurked on your forums, I'm hoping some kind person can help.

Is it too late for me? Even if I wholeheartedly repent now will I still go to hell?

My husband (due to his nasty experiences with the Church) refuses to take part in any organised religion and will not believe in God - long story. The Bible says that a woman need not be Christian if her husband is as his belief will - I'm sorry I forget the phrasing - pass onto her and any children. Can this work the other way round and if not...well that's slightly unfair!

I had so many questions that I could not find the answers to, and when I asked at my local Church, I was told "Because God says so." I'm sorry, sometimes that's the way it is and I understand, but occasionally I need more than that! The Bible is not as black and white as I first thought, or maybe I over think things too much.

I'll stop now, this is probably getting a little rambling. Please be gentle to this first time poster.
Many thanks.

 

[drich0150]

Is it too late for me? Even if I wholeheartedly repent now will I still go to hell?

Just because you leave God doesn't mean He leaves you.

You may need to "wholeheartedly repent" in order to to reopen your eyes ears and heart again. Once you do you will see that He has been there the whole time.

The Bible says that a woman need not be Christian if her husband is as his belief will - I'm sorry I forget the phrasing - pass onto her and any children. Can this work the other way round and if not...well that's slightly unfair!

I'm not quite sure if that is a biblical principle. Do you know the Book Chapter and verse you are referencing?

I had so many questions that I could not find the answers to, and when I asked at my local Church, I was told "Because God says so." I'm sorry, sometimes that's the way it is and I understand, but occasionally I need more than that! The Bible is not as black and white as I first thought, or maybe I over think things too much.

If you have questions ask them here or in the "Exploring Christianity" Section of the web site.

 

[ephraimanesti]

I want to put the past behind me,

Is it too late for me? Even if I wholeheartedly repent now will I still go to hell?

Many thanks.

MY DEAR SISTER,

Read our Lord's Parable of the Prodigal Child--Luke 15:11-32--to see how Abba welcomes back His beloved children who have strayed. IT IS NEVER TOO LATE!

His arms are open for you, too! RUN TO HIM!

MUCH LOVE TO YOU IN CHRIST,
ephraim

 

[salida]

God never left you, Romans 8:35,39. And he will always forgive-1John 1:9.

1 Cor 7:13-mentions a believing wife should stay with her unbelieving husband if he wants to stay. Why? Because hopefully one day your walk with Christ will cause him to want to turn to God with prayer.

Pray and ask God to have the holy spirit come back in your life and take one day at a time. I would find a different church. A church should have christians who show the love of God in their heart. Plus, one can find inspirational friends there.It sounds like you could be going to a christian country club and not a serious church.

Its only too late for those who have not accepted Christ in their life time.

 

[razeontherock]

Tess, continue to hope! There are people here who care, and we have a consensus of opinion because - there is no condemnation to those who are in Christ. I do urge you to seek out a Church that recognizes it is a hospital for the Spiritually sick, and exhibits hospitality and acceptance. (For you to try to pick a "good" Church based on them having sound doctrine will be difficult or impossible for you now.) In the meantime this forum may be ONE resource where you can find help, but the Bible is a much more consistent resource
Do you have a Bible translation you are comfortable with? I find "The Message" by Eugene Peterson to be immensely helpful and easily understandable; maybe others here know of something even better.

Let me address some specific concerns:

Now years down the line, I realise I miss God. I've been empty. I want to ask him back into my life, but I don't know how.

Don't look now Tess, but you already have! "Even as you have done it unto the least of these, so have you done it unto" [Jesus Himself]

I would encourage you to pray for a whole heart to seek Him with, for "in the day you seek Me [God] with a whole heart, you will find Me." Personally, once I finally realized I DID NOT HAVE a whole heart to begin with, I started getting somewhere. Then I came across the passage where God promises to pluck out of us a stony heart, and give us a heart of flesh. I put this together with the stony ground in the parable of the sower, and very shortly I had "power from on high," which was sorely needed in my situation. You are unique, but I expect there still might be some overlap?

If nothing else, I hope you see that w/o reading the Bible a LOT, you are in for extended and needless suffering.

I want to put the past behind me, but the Christians I speak to only lead me to think there is no place for me in Church. Having lurked on your forums, I'm hoping some kind person can help.

I hate to say this, but you can find people like that here, too. Kindness is part of the fruit of the Spirit we are to exhibit as Christians, yet I'm not perfect either so I won't say that those types serve no useful function. You will need to ignore certain things, as long as we are in "this life." Notice how Jesus ignored the derision of men for reaching out to the lost! Again, a Church that does this is more than likely "good," and at least good enough for you for now.
Look for small groups in addition to weekly worship Services. There might even be something specifically for your needs? Ask if you can join their prayer meetings!! Seriously, the most powerful Christians are usually the only ones that will bother to go to those, so this may put you on the fast track to getting your needs met.

My husband (due to his nasty experiences with the Church) refuses to take part in any organised religion and will not believe in God - long story. The Bible says that a woman need not be Christian if her husband is as his belief will - I'm sorry I forget the phrasing - pass onto her and any children. Can this work the other way round and if not...well that's slightly unfair!

First of all, in Scripture 'what's good for the goose is good for the gander,' to coin a phrase. If you read Psalms enough you will realize not to 'pull punches' with God. I'm not telling you to be a miltant femi-nazi, but being PC via terms like "slightly unfair" goes against the whole-heartedness you will need in your relationship with God, beginning from square one. So yes, gender-wise it is a two-way street. (There are still differences that continue though, and a very unpopular one is that the husband is head of the wife)

Next, the Bible passage you refer to, let me give you a real world example:

one of the best examples of Christ I've ever met was a horrible drunkard for many years. He was married to a Christian woman who PRAYED. I think this is what that passage has in mind. 'Nuff said?

I think it would be very difficult for anyone from an online forum to render an opinion on your marriage. Contrast that to the power of the Church, (capital"C," indicating God's presence and power) which may be able to provide all sorts of help!

I had so many questions that I could not find the answers to, and when I asked at my local Church, I was told "Because God says so." Occasionally I need more than that! The Bible is not as black and white as I first thought,

Don't apologize; God gave you your mind and your curiosity! I will also point out that an experience like you relate here does not necessarily mean a "bad" Church; maybe just insensitive individuals? Did you make an app't to speak with the Pastor? A very large Church may have other people specifically for this. A good sign to look for is willingness to say "I don't know," rather than expecting you to blindly accept their point of view.

I hope you are seeing that a whole-hearted effort on your part will seek out every avenue: Godly people (willing to help you with your struggles) within the Church, attending worship services, reading the Bible all the way through, and prayer. (Not necessarily in that order) I would put prayer as mainly you talking to God, and reading the Bible as God speaking directly to YOU. I hope it's obvious which is more important? A real key is when you see something in the Bible you need or want, to pray for that right then and there ... and don't become over-anxious or obsessed with what you don't understand. Read it, ask questions, and GROW. In Christ,

Ray

 

[Prisca982]

Dear TessHopes.

Please be utterly assured of God's love for you. He sent his Son to die for you. It is never too late, and no sin is too deep for the blood of Jesus and the forgiveness of God. If you have missed him, he has missed you tenfold and is longing to hear your voice.

The verse you are referring to is 1 Cor 7v14. It's a bit complicated - it talks about a husband OR a wife being sanctified by their believing partner. I'm not sure what it means exactly, but if you find a good church (look for one that relies upon the Bible and teaches forgiveness through grace alone) then I am sure the leaders would be willing to help you understand it. What I do know is that if you pray for your husband, God can do more abundantly than you ask or think.

I am so sorry that you have had such a bad experience of Christians. The trouble is that the best of us are still sinners and far from perfect; however, if you find a Bible believing church then you will hopefully meet with some who are more sanctified and more gracious

I wish you every blessing in Christ xx

 

[aiki]

I'll explain. Some time ago, I lost my best friend. His death was sad but not unexpected. At the time, I prayed God to care for him, and believed it would be so. As time went on, I was unable to accept the loss, and turned to God for help. Whatever I did, I could not shake the utterly desolate feeling of being completely alone. I cannot describe the blackness surrounding me. For the first time in my life, I had really REALLY needed God, and he was not there.

Do you mean you could not sense Him? What was it you were expecting God to do, exactly?

The Christians I spoke to were patronising at best and nasty at worst. I could not keep my faith, and the only person who displayed any compassion at all was Buddhist. After a lot of tears, I decided God had abandoned me and I became Buddhist.

Hmmm...If you thought God had abandoned you, then you must have thought He was with you - at some point. How did you come to this belief? Why did you think He was with you and then not?

Not having a God as such, and just looking inwards seemed so much better than having a God that would ignore me when in such great pain. I don't know, perhaps my anger prevented me from hearing Him but I looked for signs that He was with me and I saw none at the time, and it broke my heart.

Yeah, I can understand that. Um, why, if you were angry with God, did it break your heart to find Him absent? Or was your anger directed elsewhere?

Now years down the line, I realise I miss God. I've been empty. I want to ask him back into my life, but I don't know how.

Well, I find a box of chocolates and a nice card does the trick...(kidding, just kidding!) What is it you think you have to do to induce God to take you back? Really, the only thing God wants when He enters your life is to be God in your life. He can't be anything else, can He? I mean He is God, right? You just have to submit yourself entirely to Him. Simple, eh? Or, maybe not...God wants to be the Boss of you; He calls the shots; He orders your values and morals; He says what goes and what stays in your life. God's not into half-measures, I'm afraid. How about you?

God has bridged the gap between you and Him through the person of His Son, Jesus Christ. Receiving Christ as your own personal Saviour and Lord is the sole avenue through which anyone gains acceptance with God.

John 3:36
36 He who believes in the Son has everlasting life; and he who does not believe the Son shall not see life, but the wrath of God abides on him."

1 John 5:11-12
11 And this is the testimony: that God has given us eternal life, and this life is in His Son.
12 He who has the Son has life; he who does not have the Son of God does not have life.

Romans 10:9-13
9 that if you confess with your mouth the Lord Jesus and believe in your heart that God has raised Him from the dead, you will be saved.
10 For with the heart one believes unto righteousness, and with the mouth confession is made unto salvation.
11 For the Scripture says, "Whoever believes on Him will not be put to shame."
12 For there is no distinction between Jew and Greek, for the same Lord over all is rich to all who call upon Him.
13 For "whoever calls on the name of the Lord shall be saved."

I feel I turned my back too long ago, and sinned too much and He won't want me back anyway. I did drugs, had sex without being married (although later married the man in question - I know it doesn't make it right), was intimate with another woman and much more. For most of the things I've done I am truly sorry, however some were just new experiences and although I may not want to repeat them I can't be sorry for what I learned from them.

No one's sin can exceed God's mercy and grace. God does intend for us to change, however, to abandon those things as evil that we once may have cherished. Are you ready to do so?

I want to put the past behind me, but the Christians I speak to only lead me to think there is no place for me in Church.

Pffft! Nonsense! The church is full of people who were once "alienated from God and enemies in their mind toward Him by wicked works" (Col. 1:21) Many of the earliest Christians came out of some pretty awful pasts. Paul the apostle explains:

1 Corinthians 6:9-11
9 Do you not know that the unrighteous will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived. Neither fornicators, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor homosexuals, nor sodomites,
10 nor thieves, nor covetous, nor drunkards, nor revilers, nor extortioners will inherit the kingdom of God.
11 And such were some of you. But you were washed, but you were sanctified, but you were justified in the name of the Lord Jesus and by the Spirit of our God. (underline mine)

See? If God can redeem these folk, I'm sure He can do the same for you! Every Christian was at one time a hell-bound sinner. As the Bible says, "There is none righteous, no, not one." (Ro. 3:10)

My husband (due to his nasty experiences with the Church) refuses to take part in any organised religion and will not believe in God - long story. The Bible says that a woman need not be Christian if her husband is as his belief will - I'm sorry I forget the phrasing - pass onto her and any children. Can this work the other way round and if not...well that's slightly unfair!

You misunderstand the verse in 1 Corinthians 7. Verse 14 speaks of external, associative sanctification, not internal, spiritual sanctification. Everyone must be "born again" and set apart, or sanctified, unto God in their heart. All that being married to a Christian does, however, is sanctify one's relationship to that Christian person before God. No one is made a child of God by association; each person must choose Christ for him/herself.

Selah.

 

[Maggie893]

Hey Tess!

It is not too late for you and I think you know that based on your post. There is nothing that you have done that God can not forgive you.

He loves you completely......in ways you can't even yet begin to imagine. Not "feeling" His presence has nothing to do with the reality of His constant presence....it's simply a byproduct of you not knowing Him well enough...not engaging Him often enough....setting expectations that He has not agreed to. Put all that behind you.

I can tell you a similar story...I grew up knowing Jesus and wanting to be like Him but I eventually moved away from Him and eventually broke everyone of the ten commandments at least once. But Jesus didn't leave me in the pit of brokenness. He drew me back and I surrendered it all to Him. I can tell you for sure that He can completely forgive you.

God can not love you any more than He does right now and He can not love you any less than He does right now. His love is complete, perfect and all encompassing...not dependent at all on you.

Don't spend time worrying about the future, your husband, where you have been or what you think you have to do. Just get to prayer and release all that sin to Him who can cleanse you completely. Spend time in His word. Listen to some Christian music that helps keep you focused on who God is. Keep Him primary in your heart and mind.

He will do all you need.

I'll be praying for you!

 

[Maggie893]

.. sorry glitch doubleposted.

 

[LWB]

Yes TessHopes, God will accept you back.

If your leg suffered an infection and became so bad it seemed the only thing to do was amputate it, but then it came good and finally recovered to full health again, would you still want to amputate it for what it put you through?

You are a part of Christ's body, and the entire body will rejoice to have you back.

Simply repent of your sin and put yourself right with the Lord. Refresh yourself with the gospels and take the teachings of Christ to heart. Obey them, and it will be like you never left.

 

[Phaedron777]

It sounds to me like you were never really saved. The solution is to get saved. Then you will know God and reach the point where you can't fall away. I can relate. After my dad killed himself and my grandma died I was angry at myself and bitter towards God for many years. I used to think God hated me.

Try prayer, reading the Bible, and fasting. When you are born again for real you will receive the Holy Spirit and find comfort, among the nine fruits of the spirit. Good luck in your journey.

 

[cranberries]

I'll explain. Some time ago, I lost my best friend. His death was sad but not unexpected. At the time, I prayed God to care for him, and believed it would be so. As time went on, I was unable to accept the loss, and turned to God for help. Whatever I did, I could not shake the utterly desolate feeling of being completely alone. I cannot describe the blackness surrounding me. For the first time in my life, I had really REALLY needed God, and he was not there. The Christians I spoke to were patronising at best and nasty at worst. I could not keep my faith, and the only person who displayed any compassion at all was Buddhist. After a lot of tears, I decided God had abandoned me and I became Buddhist. Not having a God as such, and just looking inwards seemed so much better than having a God that would ignore me when in such great pain. I don't know, perhaps my anger prevented me from hearing Him but I looked for signs that He was with me and I saw none at the time, and it broke my heart.

Now years down the line, I realise I miss God. I've been empty. I want to ask him back into my life, but I don't know how. I feel I turned my back too long ago, and sinned too much and He won't want me back anyway. I did drugs, had sex without being married (although later married the man in question - I know it doesn't make it right), was intimate with another woman and much more. For most of the things I've done I am truly sorry, however some were just new experiences and although I may not want to repeat them I can't be sorry for what I learned from them.

I want to put the past behind me, but the Christians I speak to only lead me to think there is no place for me in Church. Having lurked on your forums, I'm hoping some kind person can help.

Is it too late for me? Even if I wholeheartedly repent now will I still go to hell?

My husband (due to his nasty experiences with the Church) refuses to take part in any organised religion and will not believe in God - long story. The Bible says that a woman need not be Christian if her husband is as his belief will - I'm sorry I forget the phrasing - pass onto her and any children. Can this work the other way round and if not...well that's slightly unfair!

I had so many questions that I could not find the answers to, and when I asked at my local Church, I was told "Because God says so." I'm sorry, sometimes that's the way it is and I understand, but occasionally I need more than that! The Bible is not as black and white as I first thought, or maybe I over think things too much.

I'll stop now, this is probably getting a little rambling. Please be gentle to this first time poster.
Many thanks.

I am sorry for the pain you went through.Please know it is never to late to come back to God.Jesus will never turn away anyone who comes to him never never turn you away.He will heal your heart and pardon you freely and restore your soul.

Both man and wife each have to come to Jesus and ask for forgiveness and believe on Him for themself.Their spouse believing in Jesus will not get them to heaven although the spouse can pray that Jesus lead them to repentance and live a godly loving lifestyle for an example.

Jesus welcomes you with open arms when you come to Him,it is never too late and he loves to have mercy on you and restore your soul.He forgives as soon as you ask him too.It will help if you spend lots of time in prayer and reading the bible alsoThis will renew your mind.Jesus longs to comfort you and give you peace and rest.All you have to dois come.

 

[yourstrulyjulie]

It is never too late!!!

and I've never heard that part about a husband passing faith onto everyone, though it looks like others have already explained that.

 

[razeontherock]

Is it too late when the OP was from last June, and it was her only post?