Worst thing ever said to you or a loved one about your disability

[andynew]

I have a neurological condition, which makes my muscles weak.

Anyway, back when i was about 9 (13 years ago or so) and could walk a little but used a wheelchair, a taxi driver picked me up with my mum.
One of the first things he said was "can he talk?" to my mum.

I just laugh about it now, even though it was quite hurtful at the time

 

[CounselorForChrist]

Keep in mind I am LD with an IQ of 138...so to put it lightly I am competent.

I notice often someone whos LD has a high IQ. When I had my IQ test at like 12 my IQ was 148. It remained that way until my brain injury which dropped it to 109. At which point I lost most of my schooling, memories...etc I also gained the ability to not remember things easily. Which when people here I lost so much IQ they think/treat me like I am mentally incapable. I'm still me and 109 is still a great IQ.

However the worst comment to me was by my own family members (all of them). My grandmother found out I won my SSI case she said:

Grandmother: So your disabled? (does cocky mumble). Are you still going to try and work? You really should!".
Me: I did have a few jobs before but they didn't last long. Even the SSI lawyer and judge agreed I may never be able to work since my health has gotten worse.
Grandmother: You couldn't flip burgers or something?
Me: No, it was already discussed!
Grandmother: Well I know so and so whos mental re-tarded son gets paid to fold boxes.
Me: What does that have to do with me and what I have?
Grandmother: Your don't have mental re-tardation and yet you can't work.
Me: What if I had no arms?
Grandmother: I seen stories of people with no arms who work too!
Me: (sighs) Everyone is different.

Fast forward a 2 years:
Grandmother:: Still no job yet?
Me: I do fix computers at home a bit, so its been good.
Grandmother: I mean a real job that you could survive from. One where you don't need to live at home.
Me: I live at home because my doctor things its best for now. And fixing computers is still a real job. It gives me something to do!
Grandmother: Are you sure you just aren't holding yourself back?
Me: Yes grandma, I am. I love not working! The daily comments of of being told I am lazy, useless, a burden, not lovable... I strive for those comments! It makes me so happy! I love not being able to fit in with anyone and then behind left behind. I love how family avoids me like the plague and doesn't accept me. Or how I sit home most days crying wishing I had a life. (being sarcastic obviously)
Grandmother: (silence then starts talking to someone else)

I've gotten better at dealing with the comments now. But its hard knowing your own family treats you like junk, even when you have amazing things going on. I am marrying my fiance overseas in a month and have sold everything I can to get there and pay for the wedding. When I told my family I just got insults or no one 100% really caring. My grandmother simply said "Oh, are you sure you want to get married since...you know?". >.<

You'd think seeing a disable man get married to woman that loves him and looks past his disability would at least make them smile. I'm staying strong though. I made it without them or their money. I don't need them now and I won't need them later. God is my family!

Of course I told my parents my grandmother and other family members are no invited to the wedding here. My moms fine with it. My dad is not. He says its wrong as a christian to not invite them. I told him I don't hate them, but I love them from a distance. Theres a difference.

 

[LJCTAM]

I have a handicapped parking permit. I had spinal surgery a year ago due to herniated disk. The disc is surrounded by a hard shell called an ulnar that holds fluid. Not only was my disc out of place, the ulnar was broken, the fluid had all leaked out, and my sciatic nerve was being crushed.
In addition to that I have degenerative disk disease in my back, osteoarthritis in my back. bursitis in my hip. rheumatoid arthritis, and fibromyalgia.
I once had a man who was parked in another spot watch me park in a handicapped spot. He then after I went into the store left a really nasty hateful letter on my windshield cussing me and telling me he called the cops with my license number and threatening I would be arrested. Granted this did not happen and would not since I have the permit legally, but it made me mad.

sounds like people where I live
IQ range: 137-153 = pfft
EQ range: low to I don't care

 

[Armoured]

I had a stroke 18 months ago, I've since recovered really well, I lost no higher mental function, just my co-ordination is a leeetle off when running, and my startle reflex is ridiculously heightened. Oh, and I've lost my gag reflex, but all in all, could be way worse.

However, when I first got out of hospital, I had a pronounced limp and barely functional left arm, and my speech was really slow and slurred, I could almost cope with people talking down to me, as though I was severely mentally disabled, you know, really slowly and with small words. What I think upset most was the people who wouldn't talk to me at all, but insisted on talking to my wife about me while I was standing right there, like you would about a pet, or furniture. Hearing people talking about how "tragic" it was that my wife and daughter were "stuck with me", again, from people talking right in front of me as if I were deaf was pretty rough, too.

 

[CounselorForChrist]

sounds like people where I live
IQ range: 137-153 = pfft
EQ range: low to I don't care

If I recall they say people with high IQs lack most eveything else. Einstein wasn't good at being sociable, he didn't know how to tie his own shoes even. My friend was like that. High IQ, low brain function outside of it LOL.

 

[LJCTAM]

If I recall they say people with high IQs lack most eveything else. Einstein wasn't good at being sociable, he didn't know how to tie his own shoes even. My friend was like that. High IQ, low brain function outside of it LOL.

oh freakazoid, how you are correct unfortunately

 

[HonestTruth]

If I recall they say people with high IQs lack most eveything else. Einstein wasn't good at being sociable, he didn't know how to tie his own shoes even. My friend was like that. High IQ, low brain function outside of it LOL.

People who are learning disabled can have high IQ's. I know from personal experience. My IQ is very high but my ability to solve puzzles rates about as low as that of a five year old. This probably due to severe head injuries suffered during my terribly traumatic childhood.

 

[FutureAndAHope]

Hi,

I am not actually disabled. But I have some encouragement from the bible for those of you who are. Many people who are sick think to some degree in the back of their mind that God may be punishing them. But sickness, and disability are not a measuring sick of success or failure in God. Elisha one of the greatest prophets in the bible, who had performed many miracles of his own, became sick and died of his sickness. God did not heal him. Yet a man was thrown into the grave of Elisha, and when the dead man hit Elisha's dead body, the man who had been thrown into the grave came alive again. So a man who died sick rose a guy from the dead. Your sickness does not determine your position and power in God. Do amazing things for God, he is with you.

 

[moerunamida]

I just lost my job due to my health. I have something called sponydylolisthesis which basically is my lower vertebrae is slipping off my spine. I get a lot of nerve pain/numbness in my toes. My job I had was very physical, and I had to lift heavy things. It aggravated it to the point where I had to chose if I wanted to be fired or quit. I've had this back condition and felt the pain from it for over 17 years. The worst thing that has been said to me was going to doctor to doctor, year after year and hearing "There is nothing wrong with your back. You're fine."

I also get migraines daily. No idea why that is happening, been getting them off and on like that since I was a child. Have to find a neurosurgeon for both of these issues, get an MRI, and see what the next step is.