Why was is okay for men to marry multiple women but women couldn’t?

[eleos1954]

Genesis 19:6-8, this isn’t really about marriage but I just noticed how lot was willing to give up his daughters like they were nothing, and God didn’t say anything about it. How come it was okay for women to be treated like that. Not to sound rude or anything, but I don’t think it matters what culture or time it was, it was still a sin, right? And there were many men in the Bible that married many women, and yet it was okay? I don’t think submitting has anything to do with it, because in the end you are suppose to submit to each other and stick with each other. I understand “man of the house”, or whatever you wanna call it but it’s just doesn’t seem fair that women could be treated like that and nothing was said. Many women were raped, and forced into marriage, and that was okay by God? What if she didn’t want to marry her own rapist... I just don’t understand the things that God seems to let pass. Are women really beneath men? Do we not matter as much? Were we just put here for men’s pleasure?

[/QUOTE] and that was okay by God?[/QUOTE]

No .. and it never has been OK by God.

Genesis 2:24
Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and they shall become one flesh.

Much of the bible depicts the history of mankinds' sin and wrong doings. The history of mankind NOT following the Lords teachings and some that did follow the Lords teachings.

The Lord chose love and forgiveness always wanting mankind to change their evil ways and yes, even for those who committed great atrocities.

We have examples of what is good to do and what is NOT good to do.

The way men treated women badly in the past and the way some do today .... is NOT ok with the Lord ... He is however long-suffering and wanted and wants people to change for the good and gives them time to do this.

When you look at anyone going against the teachings of the Lord (historically) .... there were consequences that resulted from them ... yet many of them received forgiveness and were saved.

2 Peter 3:9
The Lord is not slow to fulfill his promise as some count slowness, but is patient toward you (all), not wishing that any should perish, but that all should reach repentance.

and ... some did ... and some do and some will

Ecclesiastes 1:9

What has been will be again, and what has been done will be done again; there is nothing new under the sun.

Romans 5:8
But God shows his love for us in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us.

 

[JackRT]

I understand why people avoid the clear language of scripture, especially when it contradicts their socially engineered theologies.

What you call the "clear language of scripture" is frequently not as clear as we might think. As an example consider the following essay written by the late Walter Wink (Former Professor of Biblical Interpretation, Auburn Theological Seminary, New York City)

http://www.stpetersloganville.org/images/Homosexuality_and_the_Bible.pdf

 

[SwordmanJr]

What you call the "clear language of scripture" is frequently not as clear as we might think. As an example consider the following essay written by the late Walter Wink (Former Professor of Biblical Interpretation, Auburn Theological Seminary, New York City)

http://www.stpetersloganville.org/images/Homosexuality_and_the_Bible.pdf

Oh, no worries. I don't rely only upon our English translations. I also delve into the Greek and Hebrew. I agree that some passages are more difficult than others to fully understand without some reasonable doubts. However, in relation to the scriptures central to our conversation, they are reasonably clear so as to avoid error in understanding their meaning.

Jr

 

[DrinkFanta74]

Genesis 19:6-8, this isn’t really about marriage but I just noticed how lot was willing to give up his daughters like they were nothing, and God didn’t say anything about it. How come it was okay for women to be treated like that. Not to sound rude or anything, but I don’t think it matters what culture or time it was, it was still a sin, right? And there were many men in the Bible that married many women, and yet it was okay? I don’t think submitting has anything to do with it, because in the end you are suppose to submit to each other and stick with each other. I understand “man of the house”, or whatever you wanna call it but it’s just doesn’t seem fair that women could be treated like that and nothing was said. Many women were raped, and forced into marriage, and that was okay by God? What if she didn’t want to marry her own rapist... I just don’t understand the things that God seems to let pass. Are women really beneath men? Do we not matter as much? Were we just put here for men’s pleasure?

Bible Query from Genesis

Go to Genesis 19:8. There are questions asked about this particular verse.

"Many women were raped, and forced into marriage, and that was okay by God?"

Are you perhaps referring to Deuteronomy 22:28-29?

 

[HatedByAll]

I did not read the second and third pages of comments on this tread, but there probably was one simple reason that God allowed men to have multiple wives in the early parts of the Old Testament that is not relevant today. War, wild animals, and very dangerous jobs. It is likely that there was simply many more live women of breeding age at times than there were men because many of the breeding age men died before their time. After times of war, there were probably just not enough men to go around for each woman to have her own. . .

 

[joshua 1 9]

Genesis 19:6-8, this isn’t really about marriage but I just noticed how lot was willing to give up his daughters like they were nothing, and God didn’t say anything about it. How come it was okay for women to be treated like that. Not to sound rude or anything, but I don’t think it matters what culture or time it was, it was still a sin, right? And there were many men in the Bible that married many women, and yet it was okay? I don’t think submitting has anything to do with it, because in the end you are suppose to submit to each other and stick with each other. I understand “man of the house”, or whatever you wanna call it but it’s just doesn’t seem fair that women could be treated like that and nothing was said. Many women were raped, and forced into marriage, and that was okay by God? What if she didn’t want to marry her own rapist... I just don’t understand the things that God seems to let pass. Are women really beneath men? Do we not matter as much? Were we just put here for men’s pleasure?

The main point is that we can not blame God for the mess that man and the devil has made out of His Creation. In the beginning God made them male and female in God's image He made them. God's plan was for man and women to be joined together and become one. In the same way Creator wants to become one with Creation. Jesus lived His life as an example for us to follow. Even though He is the Son of God, HE did not come to be served, He came to be a servant. In the same way the Husband is to sacrifice Himself for his wife. Just as Jesus went to Calvary and gave Himself for HIS Bride the Church. So that we could be joined together and become one with Him. Even we rule and reign with Christ as Joint Heirs. In the beginning of life women are given authority over male children to raise them up in the way they are to go. Proverbs 31 talks about a women of virtue and how she is to manage her household. Even we learn how a women is to raise her son to treat women with love and respect. If the parents fail to raise up a child in the way they are to go why would we blame God for what they failed to do? We need to go back to Adam and Eve to study God's plan and purpose.

 

[joshua 1 9]

Where does it say that a man married more than one wife

David was said to have 8 wives. IF he wanted more God said all he had to do was ask. He got into trouble when he desired another man's wife. 2Samuel12:8,9 "I gave your master’s house to you and your master’s wives into your arms. I gave you the house of Israel and Judah, and if that was not enough, I would have given you even more. Why then have you despised the command of the LORD by doing evil in His sight? You struck down Uriah the Hittite with the sword and took his wife as your own, for you have slain him with the sword of the Ammonites"

 

[SwordmanJr]

Genesis 19:6-8, this isn’t really about marriage but I just noticed how lot was willing to give up his daughters like they were nothing, and God didn’t say anything about it. How come it was okay for women to be treated like that. Not to sound rude or anything, but I don’t think it matters what culture or time it was, it was still a sin, right? And there were many men in the Bible that married many women, and yet it was okay? I don’t think submitting has anything to do with it, because in the end you are suppose to submit to each other and stick with each other. I understand “man of the house”, or whatever you wanna call it but it’s just doesn’t seem fair that women could be treated like that and nothing was said. Many women were raped, and forced into marriage, and that was okay by God? What if she didn’t want to marry her own rapist... I just don’t understand the things that God seems to let pass. Are women really beneath men? Do we not matter as much? Were we just put here for men’s pleasure?

Joslyn, it appears you've never lived under a monarchy, nor experientially lived in other cultures. Where it is true that sin is sin, the vast variances in mindsets across borders can vary wildly, including values.

Jr

 

[SwordmanJr]

Though some of his wives were his downfall. As matter a fact, I believe this story is a cautionary tale not to have multiple wives.

This is a typical extreme into which most love to carry that example. The logic is flawed at a fundamental level. Making the vast leap from having 1000 wives, and the known problems in relation to that one man, to not having more than one, that clearly is the irrational go-to for those who don't know the scriptures. It's one thing to be a product of cultural, feministic thinking, and quite another to do so at the expense of truth.

Jr

 

[SwordmanJr]

I did not read the second and third pages of comments on this tread, but there probably was one simple reason that God allowed men to have multiple wives in the early parts of the Old Testament that is not relevant today. War, wild animals, and very dangerous jobs. It is likely that there was simply many more live women of breeding age at times than there were men because many of the breeding age men died before their time. After times of war, there were probably just not enough men to go around for each woman to have her own. . .

You said, "...God allowed men to have multiple wives in the early parts of the Old Testament that is not relevant today.

Could you explain to us how you figure it isn't "...relevant today"? How did the coming of Christ Jesus change any of that, considering that he's the same yesterday, today and forever? Did Paul of Tarsus change that? By what means and what statement? Many seem to assume that the restriction Paul appears to have placed on the elders and bishops somehow automatically carries over to all others, in spite of the fact that Paul's words were directed at a very targeted group rather than being panoramic. I have yet to figure out how something addressed to two specific functions translates over against all others, but I have heard some very off-handed and seriously questionable sounding corruptions of the text in order to force it into saying something that it does not.

Please elaborate.

Jr

 

[HatedByAll]

You said, "...God allowed men to have multiple wives in the early parts of the Old Testament that is not relevant today.
Please elaborate.

Jr

There are many things in the Bible that are not explained by the Scriptures. I can not explain with scripture some of these because the Scripture itself often leaves them unexplained. For instance, after Adam and Eve, being there was only one family on earth, brothers and sisters, first cousins, aunts and nephews, and uncles and nieces, had to marry for anyone to have a spouse. Does the Bible explain this? No, not in my opinion. Men having multiple wives in the early Old Testament is the same way. Probably necessary at the time because of the number of deaths of men due to factors such as war, etc. I can not support that by Scripture, nor do I wish to try, since it has no relevance to my situation today. That is all I meant by what I said. If you are reading more into it than that, it is only because you are reading between the lines, instead of examining what I actually stated.

 

[JackRT]

The answer to the question in the OP is "patriarchy". It pervades the OT but is somewhat modified in the NT.

 

[yeshuaslavejeff]

Are women really beneath men? Do we not matter as much? Were we just put here for men’s pleasure?

What does the Bible say ? Sometimes (needs definitions clarified though). Sometimes (ditto). No. (what does the Creator say in the Bible, why He created woman?)

And the title question, "Why was is okay for men to marry multiple women but women couldn’t? "
because it was never okay for women to marry women, whether one or multiple. That is called by the Creator an abomination.

 

[SwordmanJr]

There are many things in the Bible that are not explained by the Scriptures. I can not explain with scripture some of these because the Scripture itself often leaves them unexplained.

If I may, I'd like to answer that with another question: Why do social and cultural conventions somehow legitimately push the need for anything in scripture to be explained? In other words, why place the cart before the horse (so to speak)? Scripture should define culture and society for us believers rather than the other way around to the extent that we would then begin to question scripture and/or demand explanation.

For instance, after Adam and Eve, being there was only one family on earth, brothers and sisters, first cousins, aunts and nephews, and uncles and nieces, had to marry for anyone to have a spouse. Does the Bible explain this? No, not in my opinion.

Why should it? We can understand from science why the Lord instructed Moses to have it penned into the Law that made incest a sin. Why? Well, look at what it does to the most innocent....the offspring. The Lord knew that genetic deterioration far enough from the fall of mankind would bring about those severe mutations. The depths of depravity in the human heart is such that many would still have cast aside concern for the affected offspring in order to satisfy their sexual lusts for each other, and the convenience of being with someone they grew up with rather than having to get to know a stranger. God's Law was the only way to bring about the necessary force against what is known to be damaging to the innocent.

Men having multiple wives in the early Old Testament is the same way.

No. Comparing incest with polygyny is a fundamental fallacy. How you made that irrational leap in logic for comparisons completely escapes me.

Probably necessary at the time because of the number of deaths of men due to factors such as war, etc.

God blessed some men with plural wives purely as a blessing, which had nothing to do with the death rates of men in relation to women, or anything else modern people today assume into the text. So, that's an argument from silence where the Lord's word is concerned.

I can not support that by Scripture, nor do I wish to try, since it has no relevance to my situation today. That is all I meant by what I said. If you are reading more into it than that, it is only because you are reading between the lines, instead of examining what I actually stated.

I hope my responses have been spot on since I quoted your exact statements in order to keep everything in context and to the point of what you stated.

Jr

 

[SwordmanJr]

The answer to the question in the OP is "patriarchy". It pervades the OT but is somewhat modified in the NT.

I'll try to remember that when I read Paul's reiteration of the headship of the husband over the wife, which permeates the entire OT.

Now, if you're talking about how some men treated their wives in ancient times, that's one thing, but the Lord's foundation for the family did not change with the coming of Christ Jesus.

Jr

 

[yeshuaslavejeff]

Scripture should define culture and society for us believers rather than the other way around to the extent that we would then begin to question scripture and demand explanation.

Amen!
Most threads and posts in most forums would not exist if Scripture was the Standard, which Yahuweh (God the Creator) Says it is.

 

[yeshuaslavejeff]

God blessed some men with plural wives purely as a blessing,

This part is questionable.
For even King Solomon, since his supposed being blessed with many wives led King Solomon astray. (as it did or has or could others).

Worse possibly, someone TODAY might think it would be a blessing , and thus SEEK with wrong motives , stumbling, more than one wife....

 

[SwordmanJr]

This part is questionable.
For even King Solomon, since his supposed being blessed with many wives led King Solomon astray. (as it did or has or could others).

Solomon is one of the main characters where I would draw the line. His taking that many wives was of his own doing. Nowhere does scripture state that they were given to him by God. Please keep in mind my statement where I said that God gave SOME men plural wives as a blessing.

On the other hand, Nathan stated to David that it was the Lord who gave to him Saul's wives "...into his bosom..." (which is highly romantic language beyond merely caring for them as some have assumed into the text), and that had David needed more, the Lord would have given them to him. We also read of no problems with Gideon and all his many wives, but all those men in the Bible with plural wives who are not said to have had problems arising from plural wives mostly remain ignored by the polygyny bashers out there.

Worse possibly, someone TODAY might think it would be a blessing , and thus SEEK with wrong motives , stumbling, more than one wife....

I totally agree with you. I personally know three different families (through my dad's affiliations) where the one of the men has two wives, and the other two have three wives. They are a fantastic testimony to God's provisions.

Most men today, being the emasculated feminists so many of them are, would never be able to effectively love more than one wife. Most can't even love one effectively, much less two or more. Many men today are not even men by historic standards. Many are panzies who prefer to wear women's undergarments and outer wear than to stand up firm against corrupted and evil social standards.

Jr

 

[JackRT]

Plural wives as a blessing is a difficult concept for me to get my head around. Years ago I met a Muslim man who was living here in Canada for a few years. He had his wife with him. I asked if he would take three more wives when he returned to Egypt. His reply was straightforward ---- "Do you think that I am insane?"