Tony Ramirez said:
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So why did God bother to save my life so I can suffer through this antisocial pandemic? At least if I would have died I would have gone to Heaven happy.
My heart goes out to you in your struggle, and I cannot try to assuage your angst with platitudes or stories about others having similar problems. But what I can do is share my situation, and how I deal with it.
It boils down to remembering the great truths promised you by God, and sometimes leaning on them so hard that your problems can make a telephone pole look like an upside down U.
September 26, 2019 I was diagnosed with a chronic debilitating neuro-muscular disease from which I shall never recover, but die. Thus it is a service connected total and permanent disability. By 2025 or sooner, I expect to see Jesus face to face. My death will come from suffocation while on a ventilator.
Nevertheless, I refuse to let my condition dictate how I feel, nor do I let it make me sad when I an no longer able to do what I once enjoyed
The reason for that is because I understand that my present illness is independent of the attributes of God. He still is a good God, He remains a loving God, and never will He abandon nor forsake me.
Romans 8 teaches me that:
Romans 8:37 No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us.
38 For I am sure that neither death nor life, nor angels nor rulers, nor things present nor things to come, nor powers,
39 nor height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord.
In those verses, there is great serenity, and if you do not have it, ask God for it. In all things, Christians are more than conquerors