- Dec 20, 2003
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Again, sexual relations between married people is a good thing. It's not the choice between a good or bad thing, it's the choice between a good thing and perhaps an even better thing.
From this passage in Revelation "It is these who have not defiled themselves with women, for they are chaste; it is these who follow the Lamb wherever he goes; these have been redeemed from mankind as first fruits for God and the Lamb" (Revelation 14:4), St. Augustine writes "The Lamb walks the way of virginity. Follow him there, you virgins, for on this count you follow him wherever he goes....The masses of the faithful, unable to follow the Lamb to this blessing, will rejoice with you, but they will not be able to sing that new song which is for you alone."
Augustine had a chequered past with sex and his journey led him to complete renunciation. Paul also was a confirmed bachelor. Marriage is a sacrament in the Catholic church that mirrors Christs own relationship with the church and so having sex in marriage is not defiling or unchaste.
Just as the old covenant has "typologies" that point us to the new, within the new there are those signs that point us on to heaven. Consecrated virginity is one of those signs, for there will be no marriage in heaven. They are the "firstfruits" of our redemption.
Jesus speaks of this when he say that there are those who will make themselves eunuchs for the sake of the kingdom of heave (Matthew 19:12).
While it would be unusual from married people to take that route, St. Paul certainly doesn't seem it to be an impossible thought. "36 If any one thinks that he is not behaving properly toward his betrothed, if his passions are strong, and it has to be, let him do as he wishes: let them marry—it is no sin. 37 But whoever is firmly established in his heart, being under no necessity but having his desire under control, and has determined this in his heart, to keep her as his betrothed, he will do well. 38 So that he who marries his betrothed does well; and he who refrains from marriage will do better. (1 Corinthians 7:36-38)
If there ever was a person who would perhaps be "firmly established in his heart, being under no necessity but having his desire under control, and has determined this in his heart, to keep her as his betrothed," I think St. Joseph would be the one. And if there were ever a "firstfuit" of our redemption, then I believe that would be Mary.
It is true we will not have sex in our glorified states. There is a strong tradition to suggest that Joseph did not have normal marital relations with Mary and that seems to have been an early interpretation of the bible passages. Josephus's proclamations about James being the brother of Jesus might be either false or distracting as he could have been a half brother. Some people are called to completely renounce sex. Whether Mary was such a consecrated virgin , married to Joseph only for the protection and provision marriage provides is possible. In that context a virgin birth was not an intrusion and a special sign of Gods favour. But the silence of the earliest church fathers and scripture on this is quite deafening
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