faceofbear do you ever feel like your walking on eggshells when it comes to your faith in God? I dont mean that in a disrespectful way at all, I just mean that I feel like he is just waiting for me to make that final and last mistake so he can end my life and cast me into the flames of Hell.
I know that sounds horrible but I would rather be open and honest than to try to hide all this stuff deep down inside of me.
Robert,
I always FEEL like I'm walking on eggshells, yes. However, my feeling isn't what I'm dependent on. I am dependent on Christ's blood. If Christ's blood is insufficient, then I am still in my sins.
I constantly wonder why I God doesn't just kill me. In fact, I'm shocked in certain cases that He hasn't. But it's just greater proof of His patience with us all.
The thing is, Robert, that you feel horrible about your sins, but you feel horrible because you don't have a righteousness of your own. That is, you want to be righteous so you can boast. But we are dependent on Christ, not ourselves. You see, when you and I question why God hasn't killed us, it is because we are dealing with our relationship with God on works, not on Christ. If we see Christ as He is, a propitiation, His blood as our forgiveness, and His crucifixion as our freedom, then we would not feel this way. Well, we may FEEL this way, but we'd know different.
The issue is that we still want a righteousness of our own. Even if you are saved, you still want it. But this is why we need Christ. When we think we need a righteousness, we point to Christ because He died for the unrighteous. When we feel unrighteous we are assured because Christ died for the unrighteous. At both points, it always points to Christ. See, you're reliance is on your own righteousness, not on the blood of Christ which pardons us.
Just ask yourself:
Was Christ delivered over for our sins?
or
Did Christ died for nothing?
and
Are you justified by works?
or
Are you justified by Christs resurrection?
See Romans 4:25
If you believe Romans 4:25, you may not feel saved, but you are. And what do you do with your sin? Well, if you're like me, you know by now that every time you sin it's because you want to. So, just stop. Don't say, "Well I have to wait for God to do something. I have to get rid of my laptop. I have to get filters." Just stop. That's it. Christ freed you through His crucifixion. You are no longer a slave to sin. And remind yourself when you are tempted, "Christ died for me." If you have this in mind, you can certainly use it for licentiousness (I'm not condoning that thought, I'm just stating you might use it as an excuse), but I think it'll produce the opposite result.
Robert, I think, for both of us, we've been saved but we're just skeptical. I mean, honestly, if you're like me, you don't just doubt your own salvation, but everyones.
When you doubt, ask yourself why you're doubting. We doubt because we don't feel righteous. We doubt because we don't appear righteous. But this is why we have to consciously remember, "But I'm not justified by my righteousness, or else Christ died for nothing. However, Christ was delivered to death for my sins, and raised for my justification."
But remember, faith isn't the most important. Love is. We might say, "Well without faith we cannot please God." True. But, though we might emphasize faith as much as we want, the Bible also teaches obedience. It emphasizes faith AND love (which love believes all, not just some -- therefore we please God through love because it consists of faith).
