TheLastGeek
Lovable Mess
- May 19, 2023
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I'm sure that's part of it.I think a lot of people get more anxious at night and struggle with insomnia. Maybe because you don't have the tasks of the day to distract your mind?
No life is wasted when you're permanentSee, the sun is starting to set now, and while it's such a beautiful, tranquil time of day, I start feeling... anxious and unsettled. I think it's due to several things, more personal than I wish to share here in public. I hope one day to be healed of whatever the cause(s) are. And I wish I didn't have to spend so many years feeling this way. It's hard not to feel like giant hunks of life are just wasted on trying to fix the damage caused by other people.
You're so very thoughtful. Thank you for sharing this. And for your kind words and wishes. I will always gladly take any prayers than anyone is willing to send up on my behalf. I need them. I'm always trying to improve, to grow, to be a better version of myself, to fix all that is "wrong" with me. Sometimes, I just feel so tired of trying.No life is wasted when you're permanent. Speaking from experience, there's a good chance that whatever has affected you will always be a part of who you are. What happened to me left an indelible mark but The Lord has used what happened not just to my benefit but to the benefit of people who I don't yet know or haven't even met. What happened to you may never leave you but I hope if that's the case that your feelings towards the indelible mark may change and that it would draw you closer to The Lord in time. His love is so great that it can drown all of our woes under it but sometimes in order for the torrent to wash away some of the effects it requires endurance to stand in the water and let the rot be washed from us.
God bless
Your invisible endurance glorifies The Lord in ways we won't understand until we die. What may seem like a night of meaningless endurance may prove to be the linch pin looking back 5 years from now and may result in incredible life-changing fruit from the perspective of your entire life. It may even be an action which contributes to another action that saves your life the following day or changes your life in 2-3 years. The Lord loves you and will be with you no matter your feelings. One thing that always comforts me is remembering the fact that the Creator of everything dwells inside us and knows us better than we know ourselves. You'll be in my prayersYou're so very thoughtful. Thank you for sharing this. And for your kind words and wishes. I will always gladly take any prayers than anyone is willing to send up on my behalf. I need them. I'm always trying to improve, to grow, to be a better version of myself, to fix all that is "wrong" with me. Sometimes, I just feel so tired of trying.
But I keep going anyway.
One can hope.What may seem like a night of meaningless endurance may prove to be the linch pin looking back 5 years from now and may result in incredible life-changing fruit from the perspective of your entire life. It may even be an action which contributes to another action that saves your life the following day or changes your life in 2-3 years.
Again, so kind. Thank you.The Lord loves you and will be with you no matter your feelings. One thing that always comforts me is remembering the fact that the Creator of everything dwells inside us and knows us better than we know ourselves. You'll be in my prayers.
This is something I'm still learning to do. I could go deeper into this, but this isn't the place for that.Edit: P.S. don't forget to take a break from that self improvement and just rest. The Lord takes great pleasure in the mere fact that you exist and are alive right now and sometimes all that's required of us is to just live. God didn't think that existence was worth making without you personally in it.
The Lord is with you alwaysI feel like I am in the ocean; the waves are crashing up against me, knocking me down, and I am just trying to keep my head above water.
Your invisible endurance glorifies The Lord in ways we won't understand until we die. What may seem like a night of meaningless endurance may prove to be the linch pin looking back 5 years from now and may result in incredible life-changing fruit from the perspective of your entire life. It may even be an action which contributes to another action that saves your life the following day or changes your life in 2-3 years. The Lord loves you and will be with you no matter your feelings. One thing that always comforts me is remembering the fact that the Creator of everything dwells inside us and knows us better than we know ourselves. You'll be in my prayers.
Edit: P.S. don't forget to take a break from that self improvement and just rest. The Lord takes great pleasure in the mere fact that you exist and are alive right now and sometimes all that's required of us is to just live. God didn't think that existence was worth making without you personally in it.
Thanks mateWell said, Bondservant.
I'm glad you have the desire to look young & have that attitude. I feel like w/ most men, including myself, we want to look a little bit rougher & not like a boy anymore.This morning had the second of two people in the last few weeks tell me they thought I was in my late twenties instead of thirties.(and one of them was actually another guy this time instead of all women. AND he sounded genuinely shocked when I revealed my true age.)
It is most flattering that this often other people find me to still look youthful, even if not necessarily physically attractive.But then, I myself have always been much more concerned with looking innocent to strangers, rather than "hot".
I'm trying to build up my Christian section on my bookshelf - either rebuying things I got rid of, or buying things for the first time I previously read or watched & only just borrowed or rented.
Netflix is apparently attempting a reboot of the series, though I'm hesitant to expect anything stellar from Netflix.Ooooh Narnia talk! I'm so disappointed they still haven't made movies of the remaining 4 books, especially b/c 3 of the 4 are perhaps my favorite in the series (chronicles, would be the more accurate word over series, I suppose)
I'm trying to build up my Christian section on my bookshelf - either rebuying things I got rid of, or buying things for the first time I previously read or watched & only just borrowed or rented. I'm missing one of the Narnia movies, I can't find it at any of the stores that sell movies by me!!!
Why is kindness - true, gentle, loving, warm kindness - so rare anymore?
If you encounter it often, I'm glad. You seem like a very sweet soul.I for one do not think it is so rare. As Evil gets stronger, so does Good.
You seem like a very sweet soul.
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