The update may or may not be worth it, but here is an approximation of what I wrote and lost:
This. Very much this.
The end of my Christian life was preceded by a decade long attempt to form a coherent theology that accounted for reality as I perceived it while maintaining Christianity in a recognizable way.
At some point, though I didn't articulate it this way until later, I recognized what for me is a fundamental axiom of thought: All axioms are inductive -- including this one.
What I mean is that we adopt things as axioms because those are things that we've experienced as being true.
The axioms that were required for me to be a Christian lacked that inductive-ness. For me, there is no experience of Jesus being real, right here, right now; there is no experience of this person being 100% divine and 100% human; there is no experience of trinity, heaven, hell, nor of any god at all. Any experience I may have thought I had was a "one-off". One cannot adduce the truth a proposed axiom from a one-off. Induction doesn't work that way.
Without this induction, belief in a proposed axiom is not justified.
(This, then, was the last sentence.)