I am so confused right now. Guys, thanks for trying to help anyway. I's hard for me to understand what's going on inside of me right now. Am I making things to hard for myself? Is playing video games and feeling good when you make a good play during a soccer game ok? Am I being legalistic? Or maybe it's true: I'm too wicked and too proud to understand and fulfill Gods commands. Maybe any pride at all is evil, and video games are an evil distraction? I don't know. It seems my mind and soul are being torn in different directions.
My pastors have told me that I might be legalistic. That I need to trust in God's love, and that playing video games and having fun are ok things. But I read the Bible and I read things saying that I must hate my life. I read black and white statements that say that if I willfully sin and don't repent I will be judged. How can I even repent for things I don't feel are bad? How can I even ask God to help me repent for things I don't feel are bad?
I have no idea who God is. Is he a caring father who has a plan, and will make things alright despite the fact that I see no hope for myself. Will he help me even though I have lost faith in him and any desire to follow him? Or is God more difficult to please and get help from? Am I lost, and only by being someone completely different will he come to my aid. Am I too proud, arrogant, evil, etc. that he just rejects me? I have been asking him for help for a while now. I'm here now at a cross roads and I don't know what to do, or what I CAN do.
As I feared following Jesus is very difficult. From what I understood it IS in fact constantly attempting to be perfect. To fight yourself at all times. I'm astonished at how you guys do it.
And everyone gives me a different opinion, with different formulas to fix my problem. Some I can do and bring me hope (Tapero), others crush me and make me lose faith. But who do I believe? Why should I believe Tapero over others? Just the other day I was looking for information on repentance. One good article brought me hope. It said repentance (and salvation) is the lords. That only God's grace can help us. But then I read another article saying that we had to essentially practice external repentance all the time, and that there was alot of work to do. I have no idea who to believe.
Again, thanx for your advice, I hope you'll pray for me.
Hi, people tend to forget what it was like when they came to Jesus and what occurs in CF is that people will write out all these things, which they've learned over the years and then make them requirements for others, when really is for themselves alone to begin with as each person is different and each person unique.
Most of us, if not 99% come to Jesus with none to little knowledge of the bible at all, and amazing.. we are born again.
So not to worry.
As I said, my pastor understood, and was a humble man, and knew that it was not man who does the work in anothers life, and after he lead me to Christ, which was by me answering two questions (he didn't tell me that), but after that, I asked a question and left. He had no idea I had just come to Jesus, been born again, nor did I.
As to legalistic, in my earlier posts, I was concerned that perhaps you had been somewhere where such was given.
okay, think of it this way.
It is our natural self, meaning before we are in Christ, to think that good is right and bad is bad, on most things for most people; not all.
so, we come to Jesus, and we assume things. We assume what a Christian is, what the bible says, and what and Who God is like. Often it comes from a lifetime of others saying things.
But in general, most people work their way to God, or is what they try to do, meaning those of other faiths. Most feel that what they do will yield them whatever it is their faith says.
So humans in general, even if not of any faith, are on a good works system.
If I dont hurt anyone, etc etc. Is ingrained in us.
But is not how we come to Christ nor stay in Jesus.
So what you may have done, when you came to Jesus, is brought those principals with you. Making a determination on what is and what is not okay. You set up laws for yourself; based on your experience, and understanding, and misunderstanding etc.
We know this. That in no way at all can we save ourselves. When we come to Jesus is His totally His work which enables us to come to Him to be born again.
So, that's the start. There is nothing at all you can do or not do to place you in the body of Jesus, aside from having faith/trusting in Jesus. But what I mean is, it is not because of anything you did. I did not know to repent before I came to Christ, as many will insist must be done, but I didn't change in any way, nor even know much about coming to Christ until afterwards. I didn't know a thing until I learned in the bible and from hearing sermons and asking questions.
Amazingly God worked in me, even before any of that. Again, recall tht many people will toss things at you that you must or should or ought, when in fact, they've gotten this either from a pastor or from years of reading the bible, and now what was NOT required of them to be in Christ, suddenly they toss at any others trying to come to Christ or those struggling in Christ. And we all struggle..but we can be firmly planted, in Jesus..and so not be tossed around by the words of others.
To boot, many will say they must repent to come to Jeuss, when in fact, no one does so until after they come to Jesus, because otherwise it's just words, as until it's being done, it has nothing to it.
One can sincerely say, i repent, i trust you Jesus, I commit my life to you. But how does one turn away from their old life, or some sins or many sins in a seconds breath.
They don't and can't. Some will say it's the sincerity. Doesn't matter, proof is in our lives. it's fine to say Lord, I desire to change, to turn from this old life and turn to you, and your desires, but until one is in Christ, they have no clue as to what it's about.
Even though people hear things, until we are in Jesus, until we have the Holy Spirit indwelling us, which occurs once we are in Christ, we don't have the power of God in us, helping us. As well, we've yet to read the bible, so we're brand new and the bible does not get absorbed in a reading. It's a lifetime. Something strikes us today, didn't yesterday, and may not tomorrow, or may be a truth we always recall.
And the repenting or turning away from and turning to God is a lifelong process.
People can say they repented of all their sins, but they didn't, because there is always sin in our lives.
You may not yet grasp about turning away from things, but rest assured in Jesus you will see changes occurring in yourself, maybe not now, maybe later, each of us is different.
If you are legalistic with yourself, set yourself free. It is not a good place to be as has little to do with God. We can't work our way to God.
Not to be confused with good works. Once we are in Christ, we naturally or supernaturally now, do good works. It just goes hand in hand with now we are a new creation.
All depends on your walk with God, where you are at. Depends on your understandings. God knows what you do and dont' understand. God knows your heart. God loves you very much.
okay, on to your next portion. No, things will not go good because we are in Jesus. We will suffer and struggle, we may be homeless, jobless, without food, tortured, in prison, accused falsely, etc. Same can happen to non Christians, but what is very important for Christians to know is that what God does is work all things to our good (for us in Christ.) That doesn't mean he causes all things, for her surely does not.
He does not cause a man to sin, does not allow a person to sin, does not give us cancer, does not toss us in the road tobe a parapalegic, does not tell the rapist okay to rape that baby, does not tell the greedy one, to oppress a peoples, keeping food and water fromthem, nor have people make sex slaves of people.. God has no part in that. No part in when a job is lost, a loved one dies, tragic accidents, starvation, weather disasters, illnesses eetc.
He works things to our good.
It is clear we are going to suffer and struggle in this world to the day we die, but without Jesus I dont' see how people make it through, as is only with Jesus that I get thru each day. And often the thing I do most is take thoughts captive and bring them to Jesus.(is a verse, part of one) and I take my pain, my hate, my anger, whatever it is and bring it to Jesus, and talk to God, and as I said, we can have nothing at all materialistically in this life, but we can be weathly spiritually, and that is the blessings.
Not wrong at all to have things, to want a house a place, to live, good, job, car, health etc..nothing wrong, but is not what it's about being a Christian.
Is nothing at all to do with those things.
is doing as Jesus says; love others, return good for evil, consider others better (in a healthy way, my addition there), wash others feet, meaning don't feel too high to be a servant to all, feed the poor, help your neighbor, love others, do good, don't sin, etc. there's tons..and I said in ohter post not one of us does every single thing Jesus has commanded us to do or not to do, and though is what we strive for and seek for as we desire to be more like Jesus.
And if you don't feel likethat yet in some or many things, it's okay.
We are rich in Christ, spiritually..but only as we are blessed. God does not withhold blessings, He's right there, but we pull away from God when we sin, or say just are not thinking about God for a time, we miss the very natural blessings which come from doing right, good, serving, etc. The blessings are there for the taking, they are spiritual blessings.
When something happens, something awful or just stressful whatever it is, we lean on Jesus, carry me thru this Lord, I can't handle the pain, I can't take it, help me, we cry out, and we may not even sense God there, but He is, and so we know again, God works all to the good for us in Christ,and tho we may not see tht good in this life, we may see it in retrospect, may not.
In Hebrews, the faith chapter, not one of those 'giants of faith' recieved what was promised ..in their lives; says this:
All these people were still living by faith when they died. They did not receive the things promised; they only saw them and welcomed them from a distance. And they admitted that they were aliens and strangers on earth.
As you know in the world is much suffering much. We who live in usa or other places wealthier than other places are more concerned about the 2nd car, the house, etc. and all.. where others just want to be able to feed their kids, or eat that week or not be beaten or such..same can occur here, but is more common in other countries.
And surely many are Christians.
Paul, when he writes of what occurred to him and others is gripping. And was cause they were serving God, telling the world about Jesus..and they suffered greatly but still considered it a privledge. I hope my faith gets back to that place again as it once was there..
in china people are being tortured, inprisoned, blackballed from jobs, etc, because of the gospel and they are saying, don't pray the persecution stops cause we consider it an honor to suffer for Jesus' sake and the sake of the gospel and many are coming to Christ through these..
Again, wish I were in that place, that faith, and have been, but we go thru ups and downs as I said.
God can help us with things, does help us with things. But why Mary and Joey both have parents praying for their safety and one gets kidnapped is beyond us. both have praying parents; both parents have strong faith trusting God for their childrens safety, and one is kidnapped.
Is because is evil in the world, and we sin, and as well the demonic stuff which we can't see or know about, tho we have a bit of insight into that in the bible.
So in ending.. in this dark evil world full of free will beings who do what they desire, God pulled us out of the darkeness, when we trusted in Him and we are now in the body of believers, with spritual blessings and truths we never had, and we are free from teh guilt of sin, tho we sin, we tell God and He forgives, he forgives us when we come to him past present and future but we confess our sins and tell a friend as well for help.
I got off on a tangent and missed a lot of your letter, by doing so, but will come back if this thread continues..and sorry I did go off as I see I missed a lot of things in your post.
got to go,
take care,
tapero
