What sort of stuff do you carry, Hamm? Does it vary a lot, or is it the same all the time, or...? (I know nothing about the world of logistics, clearly!)
It can be rewarding. It can be lots of other harder words, too.
The day I recognised God was calling me to ministry, I was frustrated with my job, and didn't know what to do with my life, and really was exasperated while I was praying. It went a bit like, "Well, Lord, you made me, and you know my strengths and my weaknesses and my gifts, even better than I do; so here it all is, it's all yours, just tell me what I'm supposed to do with it!" (Read that in a fairly huffy tone).
And my sense of what God said in reply was - If you're really offering me all of it, then come and serve me.
And now fifteen or so years on from that, I can honestly say this job involves everything I have to bring to it. All my skills and gifts and strengths and experience - and weakness and wounds and cultural baggage and whatever else - I can't hold back or wall off parts of myself to keep separate from the work, because this work goes to the core of who you are as a human being before God, and in community with others.
So yes, it can be really rewarding; and it can be incredibly hard and exhausting and it can wound you in ways I think few other jobs could. The only reason I can survive it is in God's grace which gives me the strength and the courage to keep going. On my own I wouldn't have had what it takes, honestly.
Sorry, that might have been a slightly self-indulgent ramble! The moral of the story might be; pray for your pastor.
