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kingoffools13

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Personally I'm tired of seeing virginity held up almost as an idol by some young Christians.

Much easier said by someone who didn't bother to wait, but your assessment that it is an idol (or even close) is hyperbole. It is simply important; and a vastly polarized issue. The more people continue to ignore the way things should be, the more monumental it will make the issue for the rest of the people choosing to wait. It forms not only simple differences in social standards, but in turn will eventually effect the people that they come in contact(specifically romantic/sexual relationships) with ... primarily in a negative way.

So perhaps its not so much that virginity is an idol but sex(specifically premarital/extramarital), because it is a sin that people have deemed worthy of choosing before God's will; and it is not idolized by the young Christians, but by the people (Christian or no) who choose to participate in it.

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Cordelia

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Much easier said by someone who didn't bother to wait, but your assessment that it is an idol (or even close) is hyperbole. It is simply important; and a vastly polarized issue. The more people continue to ignore the way things should be, the more monumental it will make the issue for the rest of the people choosing to wait. It forms not only simple differences in social standards, but in turn will eventually effect the people that they come in contact(specifically romantic/sexual relationships) with ... primarily in a negative way.

So perhaps its not so much that virginity is an idol but sex(specifically premarital/extramarital), because it is a sin that people have deemed worthy of choosing before God's will; and it is not idolized by the young Christians, but by the people (Christian or no) who choose to participate in it.

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I don’t disagree with you – this was what I was getting at in the first part of my post when I mention ‘respect and a Godly attitude’ towards sex. I didn’t have this before I became a Christian, which is why I didn’t ‘bother’ to wait.
 
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kingoffools13

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I don’t disagree with you – this was what I was getting at in the first part of my post when I mention ‘respect and a Godly attitude’ towards sex. I didn’t have this before I became a Christian, which is why I didn’t ‘bother’ to wait.

I'm not speaking about your specific situation, only responding to your thread. Please understand that I'm not condemning your actions specifically or you as a person. Saying "bother to wait" was a general statement not aimed at you. The flipped side of what I believe is that there is grace and mercy for those that have done things in the past (knowing or unknowing of God's attitude towards the issue).

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kingoffools13

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Uh, yeah, but Bathsheba's husband was dead. It's not adultry if the person is a widow.
Not on Bathsheba's part, but I think it was on David's ... it was the intention of his heart to have another mans wife ... any way you look at it thats adultry, even if he smoothed the edges by first murdering the man before taking his wife. God was unpleased, to say the least, about this action of David's and took the life of his son, and almost everything else, away from David.

I think it was reasons like this and many of the other things that David did in his life (both good and bad but primarily bloody) that lead God to restrict David from building Him a temple.


I also think the true sign of God's grace and forgiveness is shown when the very next child that David and Bathsheba have together was Solomon (but I shouldn't have to explain why that is so significant).

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Luther073082

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Uh, yeah, but Bathsheba's husband was dead. It's not adultry if the person is a widow.

Ok I probably don't know the context of this but this post made me laugh.

You know honestly though, this episode with David I think makes most of us feel like "I guess I'm not such a bad person after all"

I have to say with all the things I've done in my life. . . at least I've never knocked up a married woman and then had her husband wacked to cover the whole thing up.
 
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Sketcher

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I'll have to find my sources but I've read that the more sexual partners you have, the more you are prone to mental illness and a bunch of other disorders. In fact, I was discussing with a friend the other day about an article claiming that it actually causes a mild form of brain damage haha.

I do believe that it is spiritually damaging and that it makes it harder to trust subsequent partners irregardless of how the relationship ended and that it makes it more difficult to connect to them emotionally.
Yeah, this is a major reason that I want a woman who has saved herself. I'm not saying one partner will put her over the edge, but the more partners she's had, the more baggage we both get to deal with. Yay.
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Tamara224

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Ok I probably don't know the context of this but this post made me laugh.

You know honestly though, this episode with David I think makes most of us feel like "I guess I'm not such a bad person after all"

I have to say with all the things I've done in my life. . . at least I've never knocked up a married woman and then had her husband wacked to cover the whole thing up.


Really? What the story of David and Bathsheba teaches me is not that "I'm not such a bad person" but that even though I am a bad person, God will still forgive me, if, like David, I humble myself and repent.
 
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Tamara224

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Not on Bathsheba's part, but I think it was on David's ... it was the intention of his heart to have another mans wife ... any way you look at it thats adultry, even if he smoothed the edges by first murdering the man before taking his wife. God was unpleased, to say the least, about this action of David's and took the life of his son, and almost everything else, away from David.

Well, if you want to get to the nitty-gritty of David's adultry, you should also keep in mind that even after David had been forgiven for his sins... He was still married to several other women. Poor Michal. But, for whatever reason, God doesn't seem to have counted polygamy as adultry.

But my point was that once Uriah was dead (not getting into how or who caused it), Bathsheba was no longer married. So it wasn't on her account that it would have been considered adultry. So... in line with the post I was responding to... it wasn't considered adultry when she moved into the harem.
 
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Luther073082

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Really? What the story of David and Bathsheba teaches me is not that "I'm not such a bad person" but that even though I am a bad person, God will still forgive me, if, like David, I humble myself and repent.

The law teaches me that I am a bad person.

This teaches me just how forgiving God is of our sins. That God forgave someone who did something that (at least in human terms) is about 20x worse then anything I've ever done.
 
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JonMiller

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Uh, yeah, but Bathsheba's husband was dead. It's not adultry if the person is a widow.

So you think God could forgive David for committing adultery and murder.

But if he hadn't murdered, that he couldn't have repented unless he put Bathseba aside?

Naw, repenting is about not committing adultery again. If she is now your wife then that is the start over point.

JM
 
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Tamara224

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So you think God could forgive David for committing adultery and murder.

But if he hadn't murdered, that he couldn't have repented unless he put Bathseba aside?

If her husband was still alive then how could David have married her? If he didn't "put her aside" and Uriah was still alive, then it would continue to be adultery.

Here's the sequence of events:

Bathsheba and Uriah are married.
David and Bathsheba have an affair.
Bathsheba gets pregnant.
David murders Uriah.
David takes Bathsheba as his wife.

Now, if the fourth event hadn't happened, then the fifth couldn't have either. If David and Bathsheba continued to have relations, it would still have been adultery. There wouldn't have been any "putting aside" (if by that you mean divorce), because they never would have been married. But they could have repented by no longer committing adultery.

Naw, repenting is about not committing adultery again. If she is now your wife then that is the start over point.

:scratch: This doesn't make any sense. If she is his wife, then he's not committing adultery (again). But if she's married to someone else, he is.
 
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Luther073082

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If her husband was still alive then how could David have married her? If he didn't "put her aside" and Uriah was still alive, then it would continue to be adultery.

Here's the sequence of events:

Bathsheba and Uriah are married.
David and Bathsheba have an affair.
Bathsheba gets pregnant.
David murders Uriah.
David takes Bathsheba as his wife.

Now, if the fourth event hadn't happened, then the fifth couldn't have either. If David and Bathsheba continued to have relations, it would still have been adultery. There wouldn't have been any "putting aside" (if by that you mean divorce), because they never would have been married. But they could have repented by no longer committing adultery.



:scratch: This doesn't make any sense. If she is his wife, then he's not committing adultery (again). But if she's married to someone else, he is.

If the fifth event had not happened David and Bathsheba would not have continued to have relations because they would have both been dead. (Especially her, there is a chance he could have gotten off if they couldn't conclusivly trace it back to him) .

Either way they would have stoned her.
 
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justanobserver

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How important is it that your spouse is a virgin when you get married? Do you think that you could "deal" with it if that had made a mistake in the past and weren't...or would you feel like you had been "cheated" out of something with that person?


LoL! at my age and stage in the game, I dont think its a concern anymore!
 
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Teufelhund

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If the fifth event had not happened David and Bathsheba would not have continued to have relations because they would have both been dead. (Especially her, there is a chance he could have gotten off if they couldn't conclusivly trace it back to him) .

Either way they would have stoned her.
I hate to bring this up, but very few kings are ever stoned.
 
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