To spank or not to spank please vote

[Charlie V]

It just occurred to me.

Personally, I think the best way to get the best behavior out of your children is not to spare the rod.

The fishing rod, that is. Take them out fishing.

Or if car shows are your thing, take them out to look at the hot rods. May be take them out for a ride in your hot rod -- but be sure to turn off the radio, and talk to them. May be even sing with them -- don't worry if you have a bad voice.

Go out into the woods, gather some rods and build a campfire. Then tell stories and roast marshmellows.

If your daughter likes twirling, learn to twirl a baton-rod with her. Even if you're the father.

That's the best way to raise children. Spend time with them. Show them some love. That's the way not to spare the rod.

Charlie

 

[£amb]

What happens when the child get older, say something like 8 or 9, or maybe even 12 or 13? Is one swat going to be enough? I doubt it. Isn't that when the swats turn into spanks? How many spanks is enough for older children? Why wasn't the child taught boundaries at a young age so that they would never need swats no matter the age?

It seems to me that "if" the child had learned boundaries when they were wearing diapers, that they would not have need for swats when they were older.

Beyond that, the visual of even a single swat on a child in diapers is killing me.

.

I have an 11 and a 9 year old. They were spanked when they were young. They learned their bounderies. They no longer get spanked now because they are at an age where I can talk to them. They understand what their actions have done to me or someone else, and are able to make amends for their actions. My oldest has a very big heart and will think about what he's done and will ask for forgiveness.

 

[Charlie V]

I have an 11 and a 9 year old. They were spanked when they were young. They learned their bounderies. They no longer get spanked now because they are at an age where I can talk to them. They understand what their actions have done to me or someone else, and are able to make amends for their actions. My oldest has a very big heart and will think about what he's done and will ask for forgiveness.

My daughter is 7. She was never spanked, yet she knows her bounderies.

And, may be this is strange, but I was always able to talk to her. Not about the stock market or nuclear physics or anything like that, but we could talk from the time she was babbling.

My daughter also has a big heart and thinks about what she does -- though she rarely needs to ask for forgiveness because she's pretty good, over all.

Charlie

 

[£amb]

My daughter is 7. She was never spanked, yet she knows her bounderies.

And, may be this is strange, but I was always able to talk to her. Not about the stock market or nuclear physics or anything like that, but we could talk from the time she was babbling.

My daughter also has a big heart and thinks about what she does -- though she rarely needs to ask for forgiveness because she's pretty good, over all.

Charlie

Not sure if that was sarcasm or not, but that's great for you.

 

[Charlie V]

Not sure if that was sarcasm or not, but that's great for you.

It's not sarcasm. I was telling you truthfully about my daughter.

Charlie

 

[£amb]

It's not sarcasm. I'm not even sure how it could have been sarcasm. I was telling you about my daughter.

Charlie

I apologize. It's late, I'm tired and I read it that way. My son has been talking since 12 months old and still has not clammed it up...

 

[Charlie V]

I apologize. It's late, I'm tired and I read it that way. My son has been talking since 12 months old and still has not clammed it up...

S'all right. I'm tired too, and I re-read and I saw how it could have been taken that way.

I know kids are a handful. My wife has to keep reminding me that my daughter isn't as perfect as I think she is.

 

[£amb]

I guess all this talk about spanking/not spanking has gotten me tired. There are those who don't spank and have great kids and there are those who spank and have great kids. All I know, is at the end of the day, we love our children and want the best for them.

 

[£amb]

S'all right. I'm tired too, and I re-read and I saw how it could have been taken that way.

I know kids are a handful. My wife has to keep reminding me that my daughter isn't as perfect as I think she is.

hehe...wait until she hits the "preteens". My niece will be turning 11 in September, and she is an emotional basket case. Alot of that is due to her upcoming puberty stage. I thank God he blessed me with boys..

 

[quatona]

Well, knowing if you believe in "biblegod" would have kept me from using my time explaining all that, for one.

I see how a faith (or non-faith, for that matter) icon would have spared you some efforts. Sorry. However, I would like you to understand my side of the issue: With those icons that would describe some aspects of my worldview (agnostic, atheist) many persons (and, unfortunately, mostly christians) associate a lot of irrelevant stuff that is not expressed by those terms.Thus, when I labeled myself "atheist", I permanently found myself being notions ascribed to that I don´t hold. I see the same happening to agnostics. So not labeling myself is mainly for the purpose of sparing me and my communication partners unnecessary misunderstandings.

I will be gone for a few days, Rachel, but I think we have explored the topic exhaustively. I for one wouldn´t know what to add except repeating myself.
May I use the opportunity to commend you on your discussion style? Despite the significant differences in our opinions it has all the time been a great pleasure discussing with you.
quatona

 

[CBlade]

It definitely depends on the type of child, but I would definitely go with "spank". As a little kid, my older brother and I were home-schooled and always doing things when we weren't supposed to (I followed his lead), and I think we drove our mom crazy, that's why she yells so much now, because we wouldn't listen to her when she told us things, or even yelling didn't help too much. It was just the thought of..."When your father gets hope, you'll be sorry you ever did that". And I always was angry at getting spanked, but it made the disobedience happen much less often. I don't know exactly how I would've turned out without it.

 

[woman.at.the.well]

yes i do believe in spanking! it definitely has a place and a purpose. i work at a school and can tell right off the parents who do not have biblically sound discipline measures in place in the home.

 

[TuxThePenguin]

"biblically sound discipline measures"
is awfully vague could you narrow it down to OT or NT
I suppose being stoned isn't too bad.

OT - I was slapped I believe only once (and probably not hard) and the threat of it was all that was needed afterward.
I think I turned out ok - some may disagree.

 

[TheUJKiller]

I agree in spanking. A child without discipline cannot know right from wrong.

Raise your child in the way he should follow and when he is old he will not depart from it.

 

[ebia]

yes i do believe in spanking! it definitely has a place and a purpose. i work at a school and can tell right off the parents who do not have biblically sound discipline measures in place in the home.

If "biblically sound discipline" means beating them with a stick, then I agree - they are some of the most messed up kids.

If "biblically sound discipline" means stoning them to death, then I guess the funeral is a give away.

 

[ebia]

I agree in spanking. A child without discipline cannot know right from wrong.

Spanking is not the only (or even a particularly effective) form of discipline, so the two parts of your statement are pretty disconnected; part two is definitely true but part one doesn't follow from it.

Raise your child in the way he should follow and when he is old he will not depart from it.

Yep. Beat him as a kid and he'll beat his kids (and probably other adults) in turn.

 

[TheUltimateWarrior]

Spanking is not the only (or even a particularly effective) form of discipline, so the two parts of your statement are pretty disconnected; part two is definitely true but part one doesn't follow from it.


Yep. Beat him as a kid and he'll beat his kids (and probably other adults) in turn.

my parents spanked me and the only beating im doing is beating illogical reasons on internet forums to not spank kids

 

[ebia]

So far I think I've seen you post:
non-sequiteurs
defeats of straw men
bible quotes out of context
swap back and forth between whether you take certain proverbs literally or not

 

[TheUltimateWarrior]

So far I think I've seen you post:
non-sequiteurs
defeats of straw men
bible quotes out of context
swap back and forth between whether you take certain proverbs literally or not

I havent done any of those things actually. THanks for playing.

 

[Isis-Astoroth]

I was 'spanked' as a child and I can tell you, the fear of being hit after I used to wack my sister (I was quite vicious as a child) definately taught me right and wrong. As long as you don't smack a child out of anger, and only for discipline I think it is fine.