- May 16, 2006
- 316
- 18
- Country
- United States
- Faith
- Non-Denom
- Marital Status
- Married
Hey everyone.
I've been in a great relationship with a wonderful girl since August. We are both Christians and God is a big part of our lives. We got along so great and were completely happy. But then I broke something to her in November that seemed to rock the boat.
I told her in early November that I don't celebrate Christmas. My parents never taught me to believe in Santa even as a small child. And we also never put up trees. We do give gifts, but without alot of the fluffy traditions. I was raised believing that alot of these traditions are of pagan origin. That said though, I am not judgmental about it. It is a personal conviction that I'd never try to push off on someone else, even my girlfriend or wife. But my girlfriend got really upset with this because Christmas is a huge thing with her family. She seems halfway upset that if we were to ever get married, I wouldn't want our kids to believe in Santa (something that she claims was one of the most fun parts of her childhood), and I wouldn't want to put up a tree, and halfway I suspect is because she is afraid of how her family would react to my "crazy beliefs".
Well we made it through the holidays and I thought she'd accepted that because we love each other so much, we could find a way to work through this difference. But then three weeks ago, she said she wanted us to just be "best friends". She said it was because she feels like it was what God was leading her to do, but she also mentioned the holiday thing, so I believe that is the bigger issue.
Now I understand where she is coming from. This is a time of year she loves very much. I don't even want to ruin it for her. I told her i would never try to force my own beliefs on her. That she is saved and loves God means everything to me. But I still don't think I'd ever be able to feel right teaching kids about santa and such. I feel like it would compromise my own convictions and relationship with God. But honestly, maybe because it has never been a big deal in my family, but one day a year doesn't seem worth giving up a completely amazing and loving, and Christian relationship over.
I guess what I want to know is how big of a deal would this be to all of you if you were in her situation. If someone you are completely in love with and who treats you with nothing but love and respect reveals to you that they don't celebrate holidays, would that lead you to end the relationship? Because I'm so insecure now that I'll never be able to find love without sacrificing my own convictions. I mean, how can I compete with Santa clause?
Sorry for the length of this message. Thanks for any input.
I've been in a great relationship with a wonderful girl since August. We are both Christians and God is a big part of our lives. We got along so great and were completely happy. But then I broke something to her in November that seemed to rock the boat.
I told her in early November that I don't celebrate Christmas. My parents never taught me to believe in Santa even as a small child. And we also never put up trees. We do give gifts, but without alot of the fluffy traditions. I was raised believing that alot of these traditions are of pagan origin. That said though, I am not judgmental about it. It is a personal conviction that I'd never try to push off on someone else, even my girlfriend or wife. But my girlfriend got really upset with this because Christmas is a huge thing with her family. She seems halfway upset that if we were to ever get married, I wouldn't want our kids to believe in Santa (something that she claims was one of the most fun parts of her childhood), and I wouldn't want to put up a tree, and halfway I suspect is because she is afraid of how her family would react to my "crazy beliefs".
Well we made it through the holidays and I thought she'd accepted that because we love each other so much, we could find a way to work through this difference. But then three weeks ago, she said she wanted us to just be "best friends". She said it was because she feels like it was what God was leading her to do, but she also mentioned the holiday thing, so I believe that is the bigger issue.
Now I understand where she is coming from. This is a time of year she loves very much. I don't even want to ruin it for her. I told her i would never try to force my own beliefs on her. That she is saved and loves God means everything to me. But I still don't think I'd ever be able to feel right teaching kids about santa and such. I feel like it would compromise my own convictions and relationship with God. But honestly, maybe because it has never been a big deal in my family, but one day a year doesn't seem worth giving up a completely amazing and loving, and Christian relationship over.
I guess what I want to know is how big of a deal would this be to all of you if you were in her situation. If someone you are completely in love with and who treats you with nothing but love and respect reveals to you that they don't celebrate holidays, would that lead you to end the relationship? Because I'm so insecure now that I'll never be able to find love without sacrificing my own convictions. I mean, how can I compete with Santa clause?
Sorry for the length of this message. Thanks for any input.