A story that is probably not true, but makes a point:
Some people were standing on the beach when they heard a man cry out: "Help! I'm drowning!"
While they watched the man struggle and struggle, the lifeguard continued to sit in his spot, though he was watching the man.
"Go get him! Save him! Do something!" the people shouted to the lifeguard.
But the lifeguard continued sitting and watching the man.
Finally, when the drowning man had exhausted himself and was starting to sink, the lifeguard dove into the water, quickly swam to the man, and just as quickly hauled him back safely to shore.
"Why didn't you save him when he first cried for help?" the people asked the lifeguard.
"If I had gotten to him when he was still flailing and panicking and had his strength, he might have pulled us both under in his efforts to swim. I had to wait until he had no more fight left in him. Then I could safely get ahold of him when he would no longer resist me and inadvertantly fight against my efforts to save him."
- - -
As long as your CoC or other friends are still strong in their dogmas and doctrines about Sola Scriptura and inerrancy and needing "no Creed but Christ" and "no book but the Bible" and "no Traditions of men," then your debates will be like the above story, in which you very likely could lose or weaken your faith.
Or your debates will be like the proverb: "Never try to teach a pig to sing; it wastes your time and it annoys the pig." (Plus, you get all covered with mud, etc.)
Wait till their foundational doctrines start to evidence or manifest to themselves some serious cracks. After you have begun to seriously live the Orthodox life, with or without their criticisms and arguments, but being faithful in prayer and in the life of the Church, and you persevere in these things and in being at peace within yourself and with all men, then when they come to you for help re: why what they have been taught and/or believed does not jive with history or even the Bible itself, then they might be ready to listen to another point of view.
Or if they ask questions, or even if they argue or criticize you, instead of getting in an argument with them, give them an irenic (i.e., peaceful) book or booklet on the subject. There are several out there that discuss or present the Orthodox Church and her beliefs without attacking Protestantism. E.g.:
- Timothy Ware's THE ORTHODOX CHURCH
- Frederica Mathewes-Green's books
- LIGHT FROM THE CHRISTIAN EAST: AN INTRODUCTION TO THE ORTHODOX TRADITION by James R. Payton, Jr.
- COMMON GROUND by Jordan Bajis
- THE MOUNTAIN OF SILENCE
- FATHER ARSENY: PRIEST, PRISONER, SPIRITUAL FATHER
Henry Chadwick's THE EARLY CHURCH is by a non-Orthodox church historian and might give CoC people an overview of Church history that will alter their preconceptions.
Avoid the polemical/argumentative books/authors like Clark Carlton and Matthew Gallatin and Frank Schaeffer and Michael Whelton. I tend to find that Regina Orthodox Press books can often be argumentative, and not always effectively so. (At least that's my view of some of these books.)
If they don't want to read it, that's fine. You continue to pray and live your faith.
This doesn't mean that all confrontation and debate is useless or unnecessary. Some converts are won in that manner.
But as Archbishop +Dmitri wrote in his book on the Parables: "Thus, when we are only beginners in the Christian way and not yet strengthened and armed against attack, we should not make a show of what we have nor attempt to convince others. We might easily be defeated by skilled detractors and end up full of doubt. Or we could appear proud and self-righteous. A life lived in complete accordance with the truth is finally the most convincing argument for the Gospel."
