- Nov 4, 2013
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The first expression I guess you can call it that is becoming more clear to me the more I trust God and centering Christ in my life. Is that I am so so gratful. You don't believe how grateful I am that God not only saved me which in itself is amazing and a testiment to how God knows us so well.
But that He also makes everything ok. He offers something more than this life. Which I know without Him I could have been anything evil that we see in the world. Even the persuit of this worlds riches. Which I had done.
That God can not only change individuals but families or groups of people and even moreso difficult situations that seem impossible if you believe.
I sometimes feel like the Prodigal son twice over and yet God still forgives me and loves me. The more I know this the more I want to please Him.
In some ways I see myself as lucky that I experienced what I did such as addiction and crime. Or becoming the world and experiencing all that this involves including the persuit of money and material gain.
But being raised a Catholic but leaving pretty early and into the public system. The result I might add of a divorce and family breakdown. Which has led to the family being seperated for years in different parts of Australia.
Nevertheless I always felt God somewhere in the background. So I wonder if I was always saved and then became the Prodigal son a couple of times. Because I was saved I think when in my 20s. After getting into a lot of trouble I ended up facing long term jail or rehab lol. Back in those days the whole drug rehab and courts was starting. They must have seen I had potential lol.
But after some years I drifted away from the church, got married, travelled the world, lived in England for a few years and came back. Then continued my lifestyle as Aussies do. I was back on home turf and knew the culture of sex and drugs and rock and roll. In reality it was heavy drinking and lots of pot. Then businesses again and it ended in a heart attack at the age of 45.
Then things began to change. Not right away. But I was reflecting on my life and what the meaning of everything was. But was also having these internal battles or perhaps arguements with myself about the typical stuff that skeptics bring up. Evolution and science is the answer and makes more sense ect.
But I began to want more meaning and knew there was more this this mystery that meets the eye. Which I think was Gods light still flickering in my mind or spirit. I began to work in the care industry and I think this was the gradual process that got me back to God. It was not easy as I had many doubts and I had a tendency to get fixated on ideas and arguements and rationalism and all that.
But then it all just did not matter. Still the persistent inkling tugging at my soul and conscience of God and the vision of Christs sole footprints in the sand because he was carrying me.
But I am glad for this as no matter what God was there and all those trials and mistakes were part of what got me to where I am and I don't think I would have the same meaning and fullness of life without this.
But heres the strange this and I am not sure others feel the same. But for some reason Kirks murder has caused me to be even more sure and careful of my belief. Seeing all the division and hate and chaos has sort of made me retreat and get back to the basics. To be more Christlike than ever before as it seems the culture itself is changing that it should cause Christians to reflect.
Everyone is different and that is the great thing that through Christ everyone becomes an example and together this is a force. More so now than ever I think Christians need to preprove their belief and be more Christlike regardless of the world. It is getter harder but also that is when Christ shines.
But that He also makes everything ok. He offers something more than this life. Which I know without Him I could have been anything evil that we see in the world. Even the persuit of this worlds riches. Which I had done.
That God can not only change individuals but families or groups of people and even moreso difficult situations that seem impossible if you believe.
I sometimes feel like the Prodigal son twice over and yet God still forgives me and loves me. The more I know this the more I want to please Him.
In some ways I see myself as lucky that I experienced what I did such as addiction and crime. Or becoming the world and experiencing all that this involves including the persuit of money and material gain.
But being raised a Catholic but leaving pretty early and into the public system. The result I might add of a divorce and family breakdown. Which has led to the family being seperated for years in different parts of Australia.
Nevertheless I always felt God somewhere in the background. So I wonder if I was always saved and then became the Prodigal son a couple of times. Because I was saved I think when in my 20s. After getting into a lot of trouble I ended up facing long term jail or rehab lol. Back in those days the whole drug rehab and courts was starting. They must have seen I had potential lol.
But after some years I drifted away from the church, got married, travelled the world, lived in England for a few years and came back. Then continued my lifestyle as Aussies do. I was back on home turf and knew the culture of sex and drugs and rock and roll. In reality it was heavy drinking and lots of pot. Then businesses again and it ended in a heart attack at the age of 45.
Then things began to change. Not right away. But I was reflecting on my life and what the meaning of everything was. But was also having these internal battles or perhaps arguements with myself about the typical stuff that skeptics bring up. Evolution and science is the answer and makes more sense ect.
But I began to want more meaning and knew there was more this this mystery that meets the eye. Which I think was Gods light still flickering in my mind or spirit. I began to work in the care industry and I think this was the gradual process that got me back to God. It was not easy as I had many doubts and I had a tendency to get fixated on ideas and arguements and rationalism and all that.
But then it all just did not matter. Still the persistent inkling tugging at my soul and conscience of God and the vision of Christs sole footprints in the sand because he was carrying me.
But I am glad for this as no matter what God was there and all those trials and mistakes were part of what got me to where I am and I don't think I would have the same meaning and fullness of life without this.
But heres the strange this and I am not sure others feel the same. But for some reason Kirks murder has caused me to be even more sure and careful of my belief. Seeing all the division and hate and chaos has sort of made me retreat and get back to the basics. To be more Christlike than ever before as it seems the culture itself is changing that it should cause Christians to reflect.
Everyone is different and that is the great thing that through Christ everyone becomes an example and together this is a force. More so now than ever I think Christians need to preprove their belief and be more Christlike regardless of the world. It is getter harder but also that is when Christ shines.
