think about this.

[explodingboy]

My personal opinion is that the regret you would have and the guilt in the hurt you would cause this poor young lady mean you should get married. You have also given this lady your word you would marry her and the bible is also clear on keeping your word.

However, I agree with others that if you cannot change your mindset you would make your wife horribly unhappy.

Just to point out that maybe marrying isn't the best idea if he's looking at the bible specificly to justify not getting married. big ol red flag of he probably isn't going to make it in the long run even if they do get married.

whats going to cause more heartache, breaking up now or having to get a divorce a year or so down the line because he decided he still think marriage is a sin.

 

[Blank123]

just to clarify, i'm not saying i think he should follow through. i do think if there are any doubts its better to break up now and save a lot of heartache in the long run, i just don't like seeing the Bible misrepresented in order to justify it.

If he's misunderstanding Scripture on this point there are plenty of us who would be more than happy to talk with him about it but if he is just reading into it to make a difficult decision easier or so he can use the Bible as a scapegoat then thats wrong IMHO. Its better to be honest.

God *can* call some people to singleness (there's no doubt if you're called though) but the most overused, cliched breakup line in Christian circles is that God needs to be more of a priority or that God wants them to be single. And thats something to be *incredibly* careful even saying, God doesn't like it when we put words in His mouth and He doesn't like it when we use Him as a scapegoat to lie to someone we are supposed to care about. Thats, of course, putting to the side the incredible amount of pain it can cause the other person when it comes to light that it wasn't God behind the breakup after all. So it better be 100% true when it is said.

 

[dobieman0488]

my friend said it's idolatry, that I'd be too consumed with her and our children. He actually said we love each other too much to get married, because than I'd need to "hoard" money to take care of her and kids.

 

[Blank123]

it sounds like your friend also has some issues with Scripture and marriage itself that he needs to resolve with God before offering advice on either subject or beocming romantically involved with anyone.

God created marriage, why would he do that if its sinful? Is it possible for God to be leading us into temptation through the creation of marriage? James wouldn't agree with that:

Let no one say when he is tempted, “I am tempted by God”; for God cannot be tempted by evil, nor does He Himself tempt anyone. - James 1:13

what you need to do is ignore what other people are telling you and dig into Scripture. Do an indepth study of what God thinks about marriage, not what Paul's opinion was on the subject, and don't rely on single prooftexts - build a Biblical argument one way or another using different books and passages.. And see if you still reach the same conclusion that God despises marriage and considers that those who marry are guilty of sin.

 

[chris414]

...

 

[explodingboy]

my friend said it's idolatry, that I'd be too consumed with her and our children. He actually said we love each other too much to get married, because than I'd need to "hoard" money to take care of her and kids.

Your friend shouldn't be giving dating/ relationship advice.

tha is all I can say comes to mind reading this.

 

[Margim]

...or theological/religious advice for that matter.

 

[SiyoNqoba]

If you actually care about following God, then maybe you should stop listening to what your friend says and start listening to what God says.