redleghunter: (1) "what makes pre fall accounts absurd?"
Ah, so a literalist like you imagines that snakes crawl without limbs as a punishment for the Serpent's seduction of Eve? And your literalistic mindset believes that humans are created in His "image and likeness (1:26-27) and therefore look like a "God guy" so human in appearance that He goes for a stroll in the Garden (3:8).
"(2) not about reproduction but birth pain."
Nonsense! There is no hint of procreation in the 2nd creation story; nor is there any contrast between painless an pain-free birthing. By the same token, consider Adam's curse: There is no implicit distinction between Adam's sweat-free work prior to the Fall and his need to work "by the sweat of your brow" afterwards."
"(3) so what? Cain coupled with a sister. Ewww for us now but not then."
Sorry, there's no evidence of any other children for Adam and Eve. Indeed, Cain is forced to become a wanderer and live in exile away from his family and needs to worry that "
anyone who meets me may kill me (4:14)." So where do all these other people in distant places come from? Hmmm
"How did the fall of mankind happen? If not the Adam and Eve account then where do we get the original assurances of our redemption?"
A Fundamentalist student once asked theologian Karl Barth: "Dr. Barth, was there or was there not a snake in the Garden of Eden?" Barth wryly and aptly replied, "It's not important whether there was a snake. What's important is what the snake said."
Remember, the Fall resulted in humanity becoming "like us (God), knowing good from evil (3:24)." Do you actually believe it would have been better if Adam and Eve had avoided the forbidden fruit and thus missed out on the chance to learn good from evil? No, God foreordained that humanity would be born with a fallen nature (Romans 11:32), and this myth offers profound symbolic imagery to demonstrate the nature of evil.
"Do you think the crossing of the parted Red Sea by the Israelites as absurd? Was that not a miracle?"
First, the Hebrew makes it clear that it's not the "Red "Sea," but rather the "Sea of Reeds." The same word is used for the reed basket in which the baby Moses was hidden. So this points to the marshy lakes east of Goshen as the locale for any sea crossing. The actual Red sea is too deep and jaggedly hilly in terrain for a walkthrough.
The best explanation for what might have happened is provided by the eyewitness account of Alexander Tulloch to the parting of a Reed Sea near Goshen in 1882:
http://www.weatherwise.org/Archives/Back Issues/2011/January-February 2011/red-sea-full.html
There is a scholarly consensus that this miracle never happened--a consensus I don't share. Moses didn't compose the Pentateuch and certainly didn't recount the story of his own death! Modern scholars rightly reject that claim in favor of the JEDP source theory. Still, despite considerable embellishment, the story strikes me as basically true, but then I believe in a God of miracles and have even experienced miracles.
For example, the alleged number of slave escapees is 600,000 men (Exodus 12:37)--2 million counting women and children. The claim that so many Israelites could survive in the desert for 80 years with virtually no water taxes one's credulity. No, it's not plausible to imagine enough water from a rock to satisfy the thirst of 2 million people!
I also find it troubling that there is no archaeological evidence for such a huge 80 year migration of people through the wilderness and no evidence outside the Bible for so massive an escape and defeat of the pursuing Egyptian army. No, I don't think it's satisfactory to claim that the Egyptians simply suppressed this event. The other details that are hard to swallow include the contest before Pharaoh in which even the Egyptian "wise men" can turn their staffs into snakes (7:11-12)!