And, it won't go away until you are ready to let it go honey. Sara, recently you life was spared. And, it was spared for a reason. I know that at this time in your sheer depression you cannot see that reason. That you cannot see a light at the end of the tunnel. But, there is always light at the end of a tunnel Pet.
Most want to hurt themselves because they feel that they are worthless, that they are just no good.
That's how the individual feels. But, it's not how other's who love them view them.And, it's not how the world views them. It's how they view themselves.
Often God brings us down to our lowest level in order to pick us up, because that is His priviledge. And, only the nicest of people suffer so badly they want to injure themselves.They have been through alot and want to end the pain they suffer.
It's as though there's a little something on your shoulder whispering "do it ... do it ... nobody will care." Those thought must be rebuked in the Name of Jesus. It's far better to hold a piece of ice, and feel the cold than to harm yourself in any way because by holding that ice, you are concentrating on something much, much different and something that will not harm you.
There IS a world out there my Pet, a beautiful world.
The nightmares, I think, go with your frame of mind and whatever it is that happened to make you feel this way.
Sara ... it's never anybodies fault that anyone dies. And, I think what you are experiencing is deep, deep grief.
Deep grief is very hard to cope with, it takes time to be able to cope with it. And, for the griever, that time passes too slow and things, I think, get magnified in the mind.
You poor little Darling! What you have been through!!
